"Allowing Him."

        « Cheers! » a Indonesian man screamed, probably the producer who made the SMTOWN concert in Jakarta possible. « Cheers! » the assembly answered back, more than 20 tables organized following the debut stage, Lee Sooman, Kangta, BoA and DBSK at the same table, followed by SJ, GG, Shinee, F(x), and lastly EXO. Were also present the staff, the dancers and many others personal who made the SMtown concert possible. Indeed and like after each concert, wherever the place, whenever the time, SM was having its after concert party where everyone would celebrate another success made by the Agency. Despite their busy schedule, individual concert, SM artist would make it one’s business by performing at the Family concert, showing their strong family bond and of course extreme popularity. 

Soon after the director’s speech, everyone started to stand up, visiting each others at the different tables, and the first to stand up were F(x) and Shinee going over their sunbaes table. Well sunbaes…that was the official name but in reality they would converse with so much ease that you couldn’t really tell who debuted first. But it did not really always happened this way, F(x) used to have a hard time getting along with the others SM artist of their company. Maybe the age difference as well as the fact that they did not train with the others when they were all still trainee played a big role in the « awkwardness » ? But now it was all history and they were laughing and answering back to the Sj’s members jokes. 

Or maybe was it because they were not the SM maknae anymore? Maybe because EXO was now the rookies? 

Next to the door, at the last table, right after the dancers table was EXO, SM latest trending group, the 12 member male group was enjoying from far the family party. Debuting 12 years after BoA and 3 after F(x) they were still new in the business. The oldest being born in 1990, they did not train with the big 3 which meant DBSK, SJ and GG.  And the fact that some of them weren’t korean made it hard to communicate easily. But the main thing was probably that EXO were not present when GG was booed by the public,  when DBSK  was a 5 members group,  when  Sj members went through a car accident,  when Hangeng choose to leave Sj.  EXO was simply not present in the hardest moments, and everyone knows that it’s in the darkest moments that the family bond gets stronger. 

« Kids! » shouted Shindong putting his hand on Suho’s shoulders, « This is your 3rd SM concert right? » he asked them, « Actually hyung, it’s the 4th one.. » corrected him Baekhyun. « Oh Really? » seemed surprised Shindong, « What’s going on? » Key came asking  putting his head on Shindong’s shoulder, « This their 4th SM concert and I did not know. » 

Key looked at Shindong then at the Exo members, « Aish Lucky of you! » he seemed to swear causing Exo to get frustrated, « Wait why? » Suho asked. but the elegant boy was already making his way back to his table.  Shindong was about to answer when suddenly Hyoyeon came passing by causing him to stop, he smiled at her passing by, he saw her heading to SJ’s table. Once he was sure that she was far enough, Shindong looked back at the 12 boys, « Listen kids, come to my room by midnight all right? » he told them looking for their reaction, «All of us? » asked Xiumin, « Yeah all of you. » nodded Shindong, « But Hyung, we’re 12. » informed him Kai, causing the Sj member to laugh, « Super Junior is a 15 members group, 12 is nothing. » he laughed taking a sip from his cup. « Yeah, if we count SJ sunbaenims, and us twelve, the room will be filled with more than… 20 people? » asked Suho. 

Shindong laughed again before putting on a serious face, « Don’t worry about that. Come by midnight that’s all. » he said leaving « Wait! What about manages hyungs!? » asked him Kai, to which Shindong did not mind to answer. 

« Are you sure it’s the 233 room? » asked Tao, « Yeah, he said 233, not 32 or 34. I remember clearly. »answered Suho. « Then knock! » rushed him D.O. Suddenly the door opened, the young leader came face to face with the oldest leader, « Oh Leeteuk hyung! » he bowed soon followed by the 11 others. « Come in! » he said stepping on the side allowing the boys to come in. EXO came in in the hotel luxurious hotel room, and it was completly different from their respective room they would share between 3 members. The room had a living room, a huge view on Jakarta skyscrapers and two wooden door on each side which were for sure hiding luxurious bedrooms. As expected all the SJ members were here, drinking, talking and having fun. But were also present DBSK Shinee and Kangta. « So you finally came?! » asked them Ryewook, « Yeah hyung. » bowed the boys. « No doubt you said there wouldn’t be any problem for us 12 to come; » laughed Chanyeol, « You’ll get to have a room like this when you’ll back will start giving you a hard time » advised them Sungmin. « Anyway, welcome to the real SM concert  after party! » shouted SHindong and Eunhyuk leaving the 12 boys perplex, « Wait, wasn’t the other we had earlier… » tried to say Kris but Minho came cutting him off, « This one was the before, this one is the real. » he told him. « I don’t understand, where are BoA, SNSD and f(x) sunbaenims? » asked Suho. Siwon who until there wasn’t really paying attention to the boy’s arrival came in the discussion. « This is male party only » he told them causing Leeteuk to laugh, « The way you’re saying it is really weird. » he said which made Siwon  leave the same way as he came. « What he tried to say, is that after each concert we hold an « official » party and then we have a real party between us, no staff members, no journalist and no girls allowed. »

« We’ve been doing this for now…8 years..right hyung? » asked Ryewook.  

   Suddenly the door opened allowing Jonghyun and Taemin to come in their hands full of boxes. « The drinks are here! » Eunhyuk came to help them, « Because we’re in Indonesia chic is a muslim country, , we did not find any store selling alcohol, so we bought Juices, Cola and Red Bulls. » Jonghyun said hanging bottles to who would take it. « You’re very lucky » told them Donghae, « Usually we make the rookies drinks alcohol to see how much they can drink. But there’s no alcohol tonight and it seems like the next Smtown concert will take place in September 2013 something like that… ».

 « You’re REALLY LUCKY! » stated again Key remembering how much they made him drink when he was just a 3 months rookie.  

  The night was going well and it was now 2 in the morning, some were already in their own room sleeping, some were sleeping in Shindong’s room while others were having discussion. You could say that the party was getting to its end. Luhan was laying on the couch, trying to get into the discussion Kai and Taemin were having, but both were having fun reminiscing about their past leaving the boy alone. 

« Everyone already left? » asked a man from the door, « Yah Kyuhyun ah lower your voice! It’s two in the morning! » scolded him Leeteuk, but the man did not seem to mind, « Was it that boring without me?» he asked taking off his shoes before going to greet his hyungs, « Were where you? » asked him Donghae, « I was somewhere. » the maknae simply answered,  back hugging Eunhyuk,  « Is this somewhere tall, with long hair and fair skin? »  asked him Donghae causing the others to laugh. « Yeah, and she told me to say hi.  So hi! » Kyuhyun came punching Donghae in the ribs.  « You have such- OUCH- a lovely girlfriend! » the man tried to answer back between two scream of dolors. 

  Luhan was watching the scene from afar, amused by the way the youngest would act with his hyungs, so close and so at ease.  But he suddenly remembered that the man wasn’t close with him and that he had something he was jealous of. So he did not expect the man to suddenly talk to him « Luhan ah! You seem lonely next to these two, why don’t you come with me on the balcony? » Kyuhyun asked him

He was waiting on the balcony, his hoodie zipped, the balcony door, opened allowing an older man to come in, « There! » Kyuhyun handed a red bull can to the youngest. « Thank you hyung. » Luhan answered bowing, Kyuhyun came beside him, putting his arm on the balcony guardrail, « Jakarta is beautiful right? » he asked him, « Yeah hyung. » agreed Luhan, « It was your 1st concert here right? » asked again Kyuhyun, « Yeah hyung ». answered shyly Luhan. « Please, you don’t have to add Hyung each time you’re answering to one of my questions. » exclaimed Kyuhyun, « I’am sorry, I’ll try to change it. » Excused Luhan, but Kyuhyun was showing no interest,  still starring at the view, « You don’t need to change… » he heard him whispering. Leaving the two of them in a silence, a peaceful one for the oldest but a disturbing one for the youngest who did not know how to react with this hyung he wasn’t close to. 

« I saw the way you were starring at her. » Kyuhyun suddenly said, « It was so obvious, the way you stare at her, at every moves she makes » he paused « When she breathes, sings, dances, or even walk. This is so obvious. » he added « Hyung… » tried to cut him Luhan but the oldest went on, « Don’t worry. I don’t have any grudge against you. » Kyuhyun said taking the red bull can from Luhan’s hands, « I don’t have any grudge towards you because I exactly know how you feel. I’ve know her for 8 years, and during these last 8 years I’ve been starring at her the same way you do. In secret at first, not realizing I was even doing it. And seeing you today just reminded  me of my early years. » chuckled Kyuyun before taking a serious tone,  « But do you wanna know the most important part? Why I don’t have any grudge towards you when you’re obviously dreaming of kissing her, on caressing her hair, or touching her arms? » Luhan did not answer, still shocked or perhaps embarrassed but he situation,   « It’s because I’m already doing it. I’m already putting my lips on hers, I’m already caressing her arms and  It may sounds like I’m showing off, but It’s not what I’m trying to do. » he said. 

« The real things is that it took me 5 years to get close to her, to get her to be conformable around me. It was so hard that I’m treasuring each minutes I have to be next to her. And I won’t let anyone destroying what cost me 5 years to build. Do you understand? Not even my parents or my members or her members can come in between her and me. » Kyuhyun told the young boy as he suddenly turned to face him, « But it does not mean you can’t look at her. I’m allowing you to stare at her, to dream about her, because I know the joy it procures. But you have to remember that I won’t let anyone come in and destroy what I build. Because the interest you have for her is nothing compared to the love I have for her. » Kyuhyun finally confessed. 

« Make it quick! The plane won’t depart if you keep on standing up! » BoA’s managers scolded the idols who were still walking around in the plane. Luhan was walking behind D.O looking for  his seats, but to his surprise the place was already taken, « Kris this is my place! » he told him, « I’m sorry but this is my place: E45. » he said showing his ticket. « How come my place is also E45? » Luhan asked back showing his ticket. « There are still available seats in front, go and take a seat! » his manager told him, « Wait what?! » Luhan exclaimed, « Go! or the plane won’t depart and my head is about to explode! » the manager exclaimed, tired of the situation. « I’m offering you to sit in the first class instead of the economic one and this kid is still…AISH! » he screamed going back and looking for his own seat. Luhan starred at Kris but the man had already his earphones on and his eyes glued on his phone. 

   Luhan sighed making his way towards the first class, hoping to find an available seat before reaching the 1st class. He walked passing by the dancers, F(x), Shinee but no seats were free, all occupied. He stopped in front of the blue curtain signaling him that he was about to enter the 1st class, he took a deep breath before opening it. As expected the scenery had nothing compared with the 2nd and ecomic class, the seats were larger, there were tv screens and everyone was already sat at their own place. Not like in the others class where it was still the huge chaos. He made his way between the seats looking for an available seat, he noticed how his sunbaes were all mixed, not organized depending on their groups but all taking place wherever they wanted to. He bowed as he passed next to Sooyoung and Yunho, Siwon and Boa, Sunny, and Sungmin who were playing video games, Yesung, Taeyeon and Tiffany. « Can I help you? » suddenly a stewardess came standing in front of him, « Umm Yeah, there aren’t any place left in the other class, I’ve been told by my manager  to come here and look for one. »  he shyly told her. « Yeah there’s a place left in the front row, come with me. » she informed him, she stopped at the 1st row, the place seemed occupied, he noticed a elbow, a white and feminine elbow, he knew who it belonged to. « There the place next is available. » the stewardess, told him. Luhan made the last few steps until the seat his hand playing with the hoodie he was holding. « Oh Luhan shi! » she greeted him when he came standing next to her, « Seohyun sunbaenim. » he bowed 90°. She starred at him as he remained standing in front of her, « Did you want something? » she asked him, « Oh I’m sorry! » he said realizing he had been starring at her, « They told me to come and look for an empty seat.  Is this seat available? » he asked her, « Yeah, no one sat beside me anyway. » she told him taking her bag and coat from the said free seat. 

  Luhan remained surprised, why was she alone? Wasn’t she always sitting next to Hyoyeon or Yoona? He starred around looking for the GG girls and he noticed the dancing queen next to Yunho and Sooyoung as the Korean beauty was sitting next to Jessica and Yuri. But he suddenly felt that someone was starring at him, a stare coming from his right side, he looked as he find both powerful maknaes next to each other, Changmin was conversing with Kyuhyun while he did not seem to have interest in what the TVXQ member was saying. 

« Aren’t you sitting? » he suddenly heard Seohyun saying to him, « The plane is about to depart. » she informed him. Luhan took one last glance at the older man, his words from last night echoing in his head,  

Flashback

  The sun was rising on Jakarta, it was probably around 5 in the morning and it was still very silent, only the whispers between two men were disturbing the scenery. 

« You can love her and  enjoy being around her but you have to remember that her heart belongs to me… You’re not the first one who tries to get her and you’re probably not the last one. But I’m letting you go  because I know that your intentions towards her are good, and I know that you only want to protect her. When I’ll be overseas, when I’m not around her I trust you to stay by her sides and to protect her.  » he said a smirk appearing on his face. 

« Like Changmin and Minho? » he cut him off,  « Are you taking advantages of my feelings for her? »  Luhan suddenly got the courage to ask. Kyuhyun starred at the young boy, the smirk disappearing from his face.  « I’m not taking advantage of you... I’m trusting you, …this is different. » 

End Flashback

  Luhan remained staring at the other man, he saw Kyuhyun starring at him before  looking away, focusing his attention back to Changmin. The EXO member quickly sat, cold sweat running through his back, he was starring at the wall in front of him when a voice came disturbing him, « What? » he asked her, he noticed her smile, « I was telling you to fasten you seatbelt. » she laughed. « Oh yeah… » he shyly said realizing that he did not have do it. « I’m gonna sleep a little Luhan shi. Wake me up when we’ll be flying over South Korea, all right? » she asked him putting on a mask covering her eyes. 

He starred at her as she started to fall asleep, he noticed her chest moving as she was breathing, soon he started to match with her breath and started falling asleep. 

Falling asleep, the only way he had now left to allow himself to love her. 

" I dream of you when I'm asleep, you even appear when I'm awake  daydreaming. There is no escaping you, I just wished it was true." 

Many of you asked for a sequel, so here it is! Enjoy!! AND of course give me your impressions please. 

Ali.