Where am I?

I see nothing but a white backdrop, so white it blinds my eye

I shouted, but there's no response.

I'm in heaven?

I must be.

"Ainosuke!"

I heard someone call my name from a far; the voice so faint, but music to my ears.

I walked towards the source...and I see the shadow of a girl.

"Mirai?...Mirai!"

It's her, but why is she moving further as I appraoched her.

"Mirai! Where are you going?! Wait for me"

Another voice called out to me.

Standing in the opposite direction is Riko.

"Ainosuke...don't leave me alone.."

What should I do?!

I stood helplessly in the middle as I see Mirai drifts further away from me.

No matter how I reach out to her, I can't

Riko~

Mirai~

******************

"Ainosuke? My highness?! are you awake?" I opened my eyes, only to see 3 familiar faces watching over me - Yuya, Chinen and Daiki. I realised I was in a cramp carriage, and the ride was so bumpy that I must have woken me up. When I tried to sit up, the pain on my shoulder sent an electrifying pain down my nerves.

"Itai~....where am I?" Chinen helped me up and I sat as comfortably as I could in the small space.

"on our way back to the palace. Your mother sends a word that Lady Riko is pregnant with your child, due to deliver next month. We have been out for a few months already. They want you back immediately because Lady Riko isn't in her best condition. You have to stay beside her until she delivers." Yuya said, while Daiki and Chinen avoided my eyes. They knew my concerns, they knew what I am about to ask.

"where's Mirai? what about Yuto?!" I asked anxiously.

"Don't worry. They are on the horse behind us. Queen Mirai has asked Yuto to ride her back to the palace." Yuya added.

"I'll get her in! the breeze is too chilling, she'll catch a cold." I felt so disappointed that she chose to stay away from me at this time when I needed her most. I just wanted her by my side until we reach the palace. I don't want anything to change. Why can't we be like how we are when we are outside the palace, by each other's side. The uneasiness is overwhelming me, my heart can't settle down at all.

"Ainosuke, sit down! Listen to me. You should know her better than we do. She is gonna be more hurt if she's gonna be by your side right now.  She'll be comfortable with Yuto right now. Trust him" Chinen couldn't help but explained the situation to me.

I took a peek out of the carriage and saw Mirai on the horse with Yuto wrapped behind her back. I felt my heart cringed at the sight, just like in my dream. Well, now my dream totally makes sense. It's a precursor to our predicament.

************

"Mirai, wrap this around you...It's getting cold" Yuto removed his coat for me.

"arigatou, Yuto. Yuto, can I ask you for a favour?" I asked

"anything for the lady, as long as it's nothing that will harm you" Yuto's smile gave off so much comfort that itself is sufficient.

"Please stay by Ainosuke and Riko's side, regardless what happens, forever and ever. can you promise me that?" Yuto shrunk a little as though he knew what I have under my sleeves, but gave his promise anyway.

"I will, so will Chinen and the rest. King Ainosuke is nothing like the other Kings that the Nakajima family or any of the other royal guards' family have served. He's understanding, kind, playful at times, compassionate, brave and loyal to his people. He even treats his guards like his family. This can bring him a long way. This missionary has indeed increased the already high trust people placed in him. As for Riko, she should be least on your worries. She has a loving brother, I have seen their sibling love before, it's strong. Ainosuke cares alot for her as well, so he will not see her get hurt, just like how he shield you and protect you" Yuto explained. Tears uncontrollably rolled down my cheeks, and he noticed.

"All the guards will protect you as well. You are one of the most innocent Queen we have served. We'll not let anyone hurt you."

I tiltled my head to look at Yuto, and he gave me a reassuring smile that made my heart settle down a little.

"My Queen, if you don't mind, lean on me and get a bit of sleep. It'll be a long, tiresome journey for you. So just lay on me and rest until then. You will need all the strength you need for later" Yuto did say the truth. I do need all the energy I need to face the music back at he palace. Riko's pregnancy will indefinitely lead to a change in the relationship between me and Ainosuke. We just got so much closer, and I am starting to see the end. Maybe he's really not mine to be. With this piece of news, I know that the plan that I have drawn out for long is coming to a close.

*********

After hours of travelling, finally we reached the entrance of the palace. The capital is flooded with people rushing towards the road to send their regards and congratulatory well-wishes to me for the news of Riko's pregnancy has travelled near and far.

I took a step out of my carriage with Chinen and the rest since the carriage was unable to pass through the crowded streets. The same goes for Mirai and Yuto who came down from their horses.

"Congratulation!!! MY KING!! YOU'RE THE BEST!"

"AOIHOSHI HAS GOTTEN AN HEIR!"

The people shouted and cheered, and above that I tried to call out to Mirai, but she didn't hear. I moved towards her and finally took hold of her hand.

"Ainosuke?" I heard my name. I tried to sustain a strong grip on her hand, but the crowd was getting so rowdy that before we can make a few steps forward, our hands broke off and we got separated.

"MIRAI!!!!" again, I couldn't hear her above the crowd. All I could hear is Yuto shouting, "DON'T WORRY, I'LL BRING HER IN!" Chinen and the rest grabbed me and hurried me into the palace gates before we get engulfed by the crowd.

Why is it so hard to even enter the palace with Mirai, hand in hand? I can't even protect her, or lessen her pain.

Gomenasai Mirai~ Be strong for me.

***********

Mirai stared at her hand which Ainosuke held her in and then broke off. It's not just a simple separation... it's symbolic. It's hurtful. It's so hurtful that Mirai tightened her grip on Yuto's arms. Yuto sensed the pain Mirai is experiencing and knew she's about to break any moment. But there's nothing else he could do for her, except stay beside her. Another thing that bothered Yuto was the thing that Mirai made him promise earlier. Why does it make him feel that Mirai is planning something, something that will be disadvantages to her.

Whatever it is Mirai is planning, I have to find out. She better not be doing something silly.

Everyone in the palace welcomed the return of the King. Ainosuke wanted to wait for Mirai to return with Yuto but he was called urgently to his mother's chamber. Before AInosuke disappeared behind the corridor, he took a quick glance behind and saw Mirai and Yuto. Their eyes found each other, and it transmitted yearning and sadness. The moment was excruciatingly heartbreaking, and it was so brief as he was rushed to the chamber.

*****************

I entered my mother's chamber only to see my mum furiously staring at me, and behind her was Riko, who is barely recognisable because of her huge tummy. Remind me how long have i gone~

"Itaiii" my mother continously slapped my arms and reprimanded "You leave your pregnant wife alone and you left for work for so many months. You should just come back when the baby is gone, you insensible boy"

"Gomen gomen okasan. stop, it hurts" my mother noticed the wound on my back and stopped.

"what the hell happened?"

"it's just a small wound, but you just aggravated it." I tormented her guilt. The mother-son interaction however came to an abrupt stop when Riko's cried my name.

"Ainosuke~" she ran towards me and almost tripped over, but luckily i caught her.

"You're a lot lighter the last time we met, Riko" I tried to ease the tension.

She smiled briefly.

"Gomenasai, Riko. I won't leave you again" I hugged her wholeheartedly and dropped a kiss on her lips as a way to say my apologies. Tears flowed from her eyes, and I finally realised the pain and loneliness she endured the months that I've left. My remorse surfaced and it distracted me from Mirai.

************

Unconsciously, Ainosuke shelved Mirai at the back of his mind, temporarily forgetting about his guilt, his yearn, his desire to be there beside her, protecting her and loving her.  Riko is bearing all the pain to help him birth a heir which can resolve all the issues, and put him as a legitimate King. He has to be a good husband to Riko who he knew he didn't love her as a woman, but a sister. This fact hurts him the most because this made Riko the most tragic woman in Aoihoshi who will never get the heart of the man she loved. He knew there's nothing he could do to make up for this, he literally took away her happiness by giving her a false love that will never be true, for his heart is occupied only by his first love, Mirai. All he could do, is to keep Riko company, to give her the care and concern that a husband should. But this undeniably hurt the other lady.

Mirai stood outside the chamber, uninvited into the reunion scene. Yuto tried to persuade her to stay away, as he knew the scene will hurt her, but her curiousity wouldn't allow. Curiousity kills. She finally understood the statement when she saw Ainosuke and Riko in intimate hugs and kisses. Her heart hurts so bad, she felt like killing herself on the spot. It made her more determined of one fact

There's no place for 2 people in his heart.

***************************