“Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have.”

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The warm breeze of summer gently caressed his pale skin as he projected his gleaming eyes on the picture down before him. He saw one old woman busy picking the best basket filled with the freshest vegetables in the town with one little boy clutching in the side of her skirt, as if he was hanging onto her for his dear life. He then noticed a group of mighty soldiers roaming around the market which became pretty much normal after the war. His sight grazed past on the colourful stage of a travelling circus, performing a funny skit in front of the old fellows.

Yixing loved this, having to see everything and everyone right in front of him.

“Your Highness, you do know that once you inherited the throne from your father, you will be able to see more of these things, even better if I must add.” A serene, monotonous voice coming from a girl disrupted his thoughts, as usual.

Beside him was a beautiful girl, maybe just a bit smaller and younger than him. And among all of his favorite things to do, having her beside him was the thing he actually loved the most. At first, he thought that she would make a good sister, since he’s like an older brother to her, answering all of her sensible questions. But as days passed by, he realized that he felt more like a little boy than the great prince of Changsha. He was always stunned at how such a young girl could shaken down his deep-rooted principles in life. Thus, she and her witty statements filled his mind during the nights. She even appeared in his dreams, just the vision of her, peacefully gazing at the vast space in front of her.

He heeded to her, realizing she was in fact looking at him, her solemn eyes directly looking back at him – it was the first. He was sure of that because for some few seconds, he was lost.

“W-What do you mean by that? Of course I am well-aware of that.” He shot her a fast answer, as he tried to get back his breath. He then inhaled a lungful of balmy air and sighed quietly, directing his eyes back to the scene ahead of them.

“Your highness, I doubt it if you don’t get what I mean. You’ve always loved how people do their own errands so I don’t get the logic of you giving up the throne just for a mere little girl like me. It doesn’t make sense to me.” She firmly stated, full of curiosity and maybe a tiny hint of mischievousness. Her voice told him that she was wondering but her eyes showed that she was questioning him instead.

And that was probably the reason why he couldn’t directly look at her. The little girl’s exterior appearance made her seem fragile and delicate. But her eyes told him another thing–that someone behind her was a strong, independent woman. It was really silly for she was just a sixteen year-old girl.

“Well, I then believed you missed something important. You couldn’t read me after all.” He emphasized as a sabotage to her intelligence.

She was speechless for a very short moment. She then humbly bowed her head, displaying her apology to him. “Please excuse me and my misconceptions then, your highness. But if you may do so, please tell me what part of your highness have I misinterpreted.”

He smiled inwardly, letting out soft chuckles. “As a matter of fact, you left out the most important thing about me. I may have loved seeing them people and their activities and may have enjoyed being atop.” He paused and courageously looked at her. “But I might as well spend my lifetime doing all these things with you just right beside me.” He sincerely declared, making the girl look up to him.

“Your highness…” She promptly murmured, speechless. There was never a time for the girl to be speechless, absolutely not before him. She always believed that words are the most powerful weapons she could use against people, sharp yet right words to say to people that surrounded her.

He had definitely captured that breath-taking picture since it was the first time that he had seen her emit a sincere emotion. “I know I’m only seventeen who seems just a ten year-old to you, inexperienced and still have a very long way to go, to reach your level of wisdom, maturity and independence. But I would like you to know that you’re the dearest girl I’ve ever met. I would want to be with you, grow old with you.”

Silence, he had practically heard nothing as he declared those words. He wonder if he had not used appropriate words, as if those things hadn’t justified what he felt inside. And he was scared that he had told her something that might put him in a bad situation.

After all, she was a girl of prudence and sophistication. She could read between the lines and could even go deeper than the underlying meaning of his statements. And if ever he had said it wrongly, she might get the wrong conceptions also.

But she smiled, a sweet and pure smile a girl like her could give. Her lips were trembling a bit, her eyes were getting watery and her fists clenched onto the silk that covered her body. She wasn’t even able to control herself so she had daringly hugged the young prince and cried on his chest.

“It’s my first time knowing that someone is actually putting me on top. It’s my first time learning that someone can actually sacrifice the greater things he has just for me. I have been alone, and I think that I might as well die alone. The other girls around me envy my intelligence, beauty and other more privileges I have but they don’t even know that all along, I’ve been envious of their parents, of their siblings, of their friends. It hurts me so much to bear these things while growing up.”

He felt his heart being pricked as she poured out her wholeness to him. He had always known the catastrophe behind her but he never knew this much. She was indeed a complex being. The whole world only knew that she was perfect, that she couldn’t ask for more since she had it all already. People judged her as a little girl who was so full of herself, that she had so much pride inside her.

They didn’t really know that those were only walls she had built throughout her existence. It was her way to protect herself since she always had the mentality that she was alone. They never understood that she only wanted a company, a friend; someone who could actually take care of her.

And that was the time that he vowed to make her feel loved.

//

“Hate is such a strong word but I hate wars.” Yifei softly brushed the shining black hair of the newly born foal as if it was her own hair she was brushing. “I can’t quite catch the logic of initiating a war. No side wins. Both are damaged, it’s just probably a matter of which side is immensely destroyed. I do think that’s foolish and meaningless. The whole issue is very unfathomable to be very honest with you, your highness.” She then plastered a satisfied smile as the baby horse had finally fallen asleep, probably relaxed already.

Yixing knew that such matter shouldn’t be laughable but he found the girl really amusing. And of course, so that he wouldn’t offend the other kid with his immaturity, he just muffled his laugh.

“Well, my father taught me that it is to show that some kingdoms are more dominant than the others. He emphasizes how glory can be such a necessity for a dynasty to last. I think you already have a perception how huge authorities take pride in their wealth and glory–most of them think that those things make an empire stronger and better.”

“In my opinion, war can never occur if the other side won’t accept it. With that, the side who initiates shall be held responsible for what is lost. However, at the same time, the other side which doesn’t fight back either loses its freedom or loses its dignity. And that’s the very logic I can only think of with why wars can’t be declined. Of course, if I’m the ruler, I might as well lose everything while fighting than lose something without defending my empire. Anyway, a true warrior fights because he defends his beloved country, not because he wants war to happen.”

He was just about to shrug, thinking that he might blabbering too much already, until he realized how occupied the little girl was to him, to the extent that she was staring already at him. “Maybe, you already need to admit the fact that I’m already mature for you…and maybe also the part that I’m a good-looking prince.” He insisted, with a soft laugh.

Yifei judgingly looked at him before breaking into lovely giggles. “Well, if you may say so, Prince Yixing, I might as well think that your statements are refined and well-expressed.” She then accepted the prince’s hands and softly shook off some dusts and hay grasses on her ensemble. “I am very much impressed if I might add.”

“The compliment is too overwhelming my lady, please just one at a time. I can’t handle more, especially now that I am shaking a bit.” The prince replied with a huge smile plastered on his bright face while he gestured the lady to walk first.

“Oh, your highness, I thought you were going to tell me something?” Yifei looked back at the gentleman behind her, as she remembered the previous account that came from him.

The prince went down for some very few seconds that she wondered if he actually did look sad. She waited and waited until the prince finally responded.

“I think we should go somewhere…private.” He smiled, sort of. He then just nervously rubbed his nape and motioned to start walking.

The two of them toured at the stables for a short time before they arrived at the Xiang river. The whole walk was very silent that the lady began to feel uncomfortable and easy too. She just didn’t know if the prince was emitting those things himself or it was just because of the time.

It was already night time and of course, everything in the place was quiet. Only the soft streaming sound of the river could be heard. Maybe some crickets and frogs too but even their own breaths were very still.

“I do think this is private enough.” Yifei muttered, afraid that the prince might actually want some place where he could find peace and serenity. She was very hesitant, since the two of them had been noiseless all throughout.

When the prince threw a melancholic gaze at her, she had also confirmed that something was absolutely wrong. She felt that he really was going to tell her something important, yet, at the same time, she felt that he didn’t want to do so.

“Yixing,” She started, daringly calling the prince with his priceless name. She would be killed if ever someone heard her but she could care the least. Even the prince himself wanted her to call him by his name, just like how friends called each others–disregarding the inborn fact that he’s the one and only prince of Changsha and that she’s the next-in-line head priestess.

The boy looked even more solemn, and heartbroken, with her dying in curiosity. “You know I am a friend right? You could tell me anything–”

“I am leaving.” He cut her off immediately, as if he had just easily dismissed what she was going to say. As much as she was hurt by such ruthless action, she couldn’t get mad at him for she knew better. He was just acting all tough and strong. For all she knew, he must be just holding back his tears.

And so she replied with a stronger response. “Well, I should wait for you then. I don’t know, all throughout my existence, I was practically with nobody until you came and invaded my world. Maybe I could wait for another 16 years; double it, triple it, I don’t care. I could probably wait.”

“You don’t understand Yifei,” He made it clear, accentuating each and every word he had let out. “I am not in knowledge if I could actually come back. Maybe you could wait for twenty, thirty and even fifty years. But what if I couldn’t go back? What if something unexpected happened in the palace? What if I die? What if I’m married off to someone else?”

“What if not? What if that unexpected something didn’t happen? What if you didn’t die? What if you’re married to me instead? I am not your ordinary priestess…if you want, I could work on our next life too.” She cracked a joke, though she believed that jokes were half-meant.

She could see both amusement and annoyance in his brown shaded eyes, as if she was ridiculously funny and credibly wise at the same time.

He then sighed. “You know what? Come here.” He sternly looked directly at her, although his voice sounded like he was pleading her to come to him. Of course she slowly made her way to him and the last thing she knew was that he had already embraced her in his arms.

“You don’t make any sense to me right now, your highness.”

“Well, it’s kind of good not to make any sense. You try it, some other time.” He then unwillingly detached himself from the lady. “An ordinance that came from the Emperor was relayed to my father yesterday. Since he can’t bear a child of his own, he thinks that he might as well pick one from the royal families. That only includes families like Huang, Qi, Yang, Zhu, Mao and Zhang.”

“That’s a lot of competition.” It was the only thing she said, almost faint.

“Competition, that’s if I decided to compete right? Please do not bother yourself, my lady. The only thing I am afraid of is to consume more and more years while in the process of reasoning out to my father about this matter. Worse, you may find someone more mature and more respectable than me while waiting.” The prince admitted, both jealous and anxious.

“Then worry not. After you’ve convinced your father on not taking the crown, then you must’ve done the hardest thing. Your father is a very respectable leader and you’ll definitely walk after his path. I am terrified at the thought of losing you for years but on the bright side, I am excited to see a newly-shaped prince–all grown-up.” Yifei sincerely stated as she held both of the prince’s hands together.

The rest of the night were filled with meaningful stares and smiles worthwhile, promises and dreams were also processed at the same time. The two of them could only hold onto each other’s loyalty, for the river and stars were the only witness they had.

And they knew too well that the day after that night, everything wouldn’t be under their control anymore.

And Yifei woke up with a very heavy heart.

 

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A/N: Everyone, I present this Lay-OC oneshot for one of the winners in the contest "The Beauty and The Wolves || Writing Contest", tixings! If you guys want to check her entry, White and Black, just click it. /throws confetti/ Once again, congrats for placing the seventh! Thanks for participating and I hope you're also going to enjoy this oneshot, hahah! Anyway, the author-nim has requested for a romantic tragedy. I've been really itching to write something angst-y and this is the right time to do so. HO-HO-HO!