The lights from tv flashed on Donghae's face. Meaningless midnight dramas and commercials spoke annoyingly in the background. Donghae curled up in the sofa, asleep.

At 12am, Donghae didn't receive a happy birthday that he expected.

Tonight, Hyukjae didn't come home.   

At 4 am, the door knob was turned, quiet footsteps came from the door. A plaid blanket was tightened around Donghae's body. The tv was turned off. Donghae frowned in his dream. A person cuddled up next to Donghae.  

At 6 am, the first light of the day penetrated through the window in the kitchen, reflected on the mirror in the bathroom and  the room brightened up with warmth. Two bodies cuddled on on the sofa, both soundly asleep. But Donghae isn't frowning anymore.

At 8am, the smell of breakfast woke Donghae up, Hyukjae was preparing eggs and ham. 

At 9am, Hyukjae dragged Donghae out of their dorm with Donghae walking beside him reluctantly.

"What's up?" Hyukjae tried to lift the mood up. "Nothing." Donghae coldly replied.

But of course, Hyukjae knows that he is upset. After spending two years together everyday, how could he not notice?

Hyukjae smiled and put his hand on Donghae's shoulder. "Where are we going anyway?" Donghae asked and thought, "is he taking me to celebrate my birthday?"

"Just a walk," Hyukjae said.

"Oh." Donghae replied with sense of disappointment.

They arrived at the nearest park, there was no one there considering that is a weekday morning. The tall trees lined the sidewalk, green and yellow leaves alternate, creating a peaceful mosaic collage of warm colors. A small vintage house made out of red bricks was located next to the entrance. Hyukjae blindfolded Donghaes eyes with his own hands. Donghae smiled and thought, "so he is giving me a surprise after all?"

Hyukjae walked closely behind Donghae, with his hands covering Donghae's eyes, he slowly guide Donghae on the sidewalk. Naturally, their footsteps synced.
Left, right, left, right.
Since Donghae's eyes are covered, he could only hear  leaves crunched beneath their shoes.

Hyukjae uncovered Donghae's eyes. In front of his eyes was a gazebo on the edge of a small river. The flow of water harmonizes with the swans' sound.The white gazebo had a grey roof, the sides decorated with white and grey curtains. Donghae entered and took a seat. Hyukjae put a small strawberry cake on the table.

"Happy birthday Donghae, I'm thankful for your birth and thankful for our meeting. We are together now, and we will be together forever."

Music starts from the background, Hyukjae's voice came through the speakers while Hyukjae sing along.

Time flies with me
It walks too fast so it makes me cry sometimes
Among this place full of masked people, the one who reach out to me was you
The one who dried my tearful eyes it was you
Could you be my darling? Now I’ll be the one who holds you
You’re not alone, I’ll be here by your side, don’t be scared
To you who let me know I was not alone
I just wanna thank you, I appreciate it
I’m shy so I send this song instead
Why is no one here?
I thought the only warm left is under my bedclothes, in my room
Like MJ, “You’re not Alone”
Who reached out to me while I didn’t know, it was you
Worn out from a day’s work, it was you who raised me up
Baby, are you listenin? Now I’ll be the one who holds you
You’re not alone, I’ll be here by your side, don’t be scared
To you who let me know I was not alone
I just wanna thank you, I appreciate it
I’m shy so I send this song instead


Hyukjae sang with his eyes closed, Donghae gazed at Hyukjae's face, carefully engraving this moment into his heart.

Even when we meet on the street
Even when we meet on the subway
Even when we meet on the bus stop
Even when I write my diary at night
Even when I buy my coffee to ease the cold
Even when I watch sitcoms alone
Even when we meet on the street
Even when we meet on the subway
Even when we meet on the bus stop (hold my hand)
Even when I write my diary at night
Even when I buy my coffee to ease the cold
Even when I watch sitcoms alone
You’re not alone, I’ll be here by your side, don’t be scared
To you who let me know I was not alone
I just wanna thank you, I appreciate it
I’m shy so I send this song instead    

The song ended as a tear formed at the corners of Donghae's eyes. His tear lingered around the edges of his eyes. "Is that why you didn't come home last night? You were making this?" Donghae asked. "Of course, did you really think I forgot your birthday, Hae?" Hyukjae replied while humming the sweet melody that remained in Donghae's mind. 

Donghae pulled Hyukjae's wrist and leaned in for a light peck on Hyukjae's soft lips. "Thank you."

Hyukjae smirked and quickly a mouthful of cream from the cake into his mouth, kissing Donghae and sharing the sweetness of the cream. Donghae's tongue swirled in Hyukjae's mouth. Hyukjae's mouth was just as sweet as the cream. Hyukjae's tongue danced around Donghae's tongue in response. The cream melted in their mouths. Finally, they parted for a brief moment, "Let's finish what we didn't..." Donghae's cheek flushed while he look at Hyukjae's shocked expression.

Hyukjae pulled Donghae tighter, slowly ping his dark green sweater, "Achooo!" Donghae sneezed from the cold breeze. Hyukjae immediately zipped his sweater back. "Let's not... You will catch a cold." Hyukjae muttered, Donghae hesitantly helping Hyukjae zip his own sweater. Donghae pouted, his gaze slowly traveled down. Donghae saw that Hyukjae's crotch is already swelled up, Hyukjae lowered his head while biting his lips to hold it in. Donghae poked the side of Hyukjae's waist, "It's hard to hold it in....right...?"

Hyukjae, embarrased of what Donghae noticed, nodded shyly.

 "Aish...Mola!" Donghae snickered and pull his sweater off,  removing Hyukjae's clothing as well. Hyukjae couldn't hold it anymore, he held Donghae gently by the edge of the table as Donghae's legs surrounded Hyukjae's waist. 

The wind unleashed the opaque white curtains, unleashing both of their desires as well. Behind those semi-transparent curtains,  two bodies relied on each other for heat in the midst of autumn. Every collision brings out their lust. Deeply connected, wanting for more. Panting heavily, words of passion escaped between each breath. 

The river flows by their side, just as time is slipping away from their grasp. The sun moves westward, Hyukjae massaged Donghae's waist as Donghae is falling asleep. 

"Does it hurt a lot?" Hyukjae asked worriedly. 
"With your size, What do you think?" Donghae joked. 

Hyukjae was aroused again, "The moment you mention it... aish.."
"Let's do it again," Donghae stuck his tongue out childishly , not knowing that it meant another ual tease for Hyukjae. 
"Now...?!" Hyukjae didn't want Donghae to get hurt. But it was too late to ask since Donghae already lay beneath Hyukjae's chest.

That afternoon, Donghae almost couldn't walk, Hyukjae lift Donghae up on his back while walking back to their dorm. 

A letter sticks out from the mailbox next to their dorm. Hyukjae grabbed it on the way. Hyukjae slowly lay Donghae down on the bed, Donghae grunted slightly as Hyukjae touch his waist. Wrapping Donghae with thick blankets, Hyukjae placed a kiss on Donghae's forehead. Donghae was asleep soundly, Hyukjae pulled out that letter. Inside the envelope, there was another envelope. The first note wrote,  "If... and only if… you want to know about what happened 10 years ago… you may open this envelope. Your father trusted this letter upon me, instructing me to give this to you when you are old enough, so, read this at your own risk. I don’t even know what’s in it…"  

Without much thought, Hyukjae slide the envelope into his drawer and shut it tightly. 

Why bother to dig up the past and worry about it in the present?
What happened already happened, what's the point of finding out when it won't change anything? 

What’s inside the envelope, like God’s blessing; grudges and grief will be resolved. 

Or. 

What’s inside the envelope, like Pandora’s Box; evils and curses will be leashed out as a result of curiosity. 

Or.

Maybe both…?