Two days had pasted by and still Jonghyun was waiting by his phone. Onew hasn't called him even once and on the daily morning practice he's been missing. No one had heard from him and he couldn't have gone home because Bling Bling had payed a visit there too and the parents was as worried as himself. Onew... He tried to calm down with a hot cup of coffee by his window, or no his and Onew's window. Coffee couldn't chear him up a bit this morning so he put back the cup back on the table and went to the bathroom for a shower instead.

The water was hot and overhealming, but he didn't like it colder either, nothing was perfect. When he finally got out of the shower he took about a minute in front of the mirror. Good, now he looked even skinnier for next preformance, the fangirls would go crazy. Either they'd say "Oh, no! Our Bling Bling haven't eaten probarly...is he depressed??" or something like this: "Jonghyun has done some exercise to lose weight, now he's even more handsome". The hunger jusy wasn't there and somehow he couldn't see the meaning of life without his beloved Hyung by his side for eternity. A tear fell down his cheek. I'm a such crybaby.  

A known ringtone began to play out in the livingroom when Jonghyuns phone rang. No thoughts about being to loud in the appartment when he suddenly ran out to answer.

"Yoona?? Why on earth are you calling me? And this early...aren't you guys on a tour? You could use some rest so I suggest you hang up" He sighed, he'd nerver though of his exgirlfriend to give him a call like this out of the blue. Two things had to be makes clear: First: he had never been so hurt like that one time when the SNSD girl just disappeared for weeks. She never called to see how things were going, she didn't show up even once, she'd even mist her boyfriends birthday where the SHINee boy for once had planed a romantic dinnner to spend some lonely-time with her. And second: She could get annoying at some points so he just couldn't stand her.

Now a annoyed voice yelled a little in the handset and Jonghyun had to snaps out of his flashback.

"Are you even listening?"

"Yeah" It was a lie. How could he regrester a word from that mouth who belonged to someone he thought of as a liar?

"Can't you help me with my preformance? I really need someone who can sing the other part of the duet otherwise it'll be a solo insted" A part of him still believed in that cute voice. Damn Yoona! After about one minute of hesitation he finally answered.

“Okay, I’ll do it…” he almost whispered. Not unexpected that she wouldn’t hear it.

“Can you say that again?”

“Fine” A bad thing about the second oldest member, he’d always give up to easy, which maybe was the reason that all girls just adore him, he’s a nice guy but stubborn sometimes.

“Thank you Jonghyun. Can’t we meet to discuss this a little more? What about you coming to our next concert in Seoul? Would that work out?”

No,no,no,no!! He wanted to scream but told himself to keep calm, maybe this could help his career.

“Sure, why not. On Friday, right?” They spoke a few more minutes and then she hung up.

He had got himself into a bad situation but now there was no way out.

The boatrental house was full of people, most of them was old couples who wanted to get some rest by travel away from the noisy cities. Everything was in the bag atleast: a new hat to keep the sun away, glasses, clean clothes like shirts and shorts and some other belongings. He had saved some money for this trip and of course there was money over for food, like chicken. Now it was Onew’s turn to get a boat, finally.

A white and blue boat soon left the wharf with waves that surrounded it.  One of his dreams had came true, he had got to sail over the ocean a hot summer day. He felt so free and young like a little boy. This had made him forget a little about the accident the other day. When he had drove for a half hour he desided to take a food-break. The stomach was his dominant part. Once he tried to don’t think about anything related to something grilled or fried it just got worse, poor dubu Onew. It took less then two minutes to swallow all the chicked he brought, now there just was one thing he totally forgot about, what was he going to eat tomorrow? It’s not like you can call a helicoter and say: “Hey, come here with some nice meals, I don’t want to starve!!” It sounded better in his head than it would’ve done in reality. Well, time to head back again then.  

There was no trace of Taemin, Key had been searching for hours and desided it was for the best if he gave up for now. Minho had left that room directly after his beloved boy ran away so the chances that they might be together now were high. The boy with a pink t-shirt as usual went to the recording studio. Lucky as he was the door wasn’t locked so he easily got in. A faint memory of kicking in a door to a louge and disrupt his maneger was something he just wanted to forget. On the table there was a computer. Damn! I most have forgot about it when I left here last time! He checked over all the folders but no change there. Phew. Fortunatly his journal pages were unharmed too. Sure he was a part of the group SHINee but one of his good abilities was to composing. The very first one was written for his first girlfriend who broke his heart. The story is very touching really, how someone just can stand to leave you on your birthday. Pour Key’s head started to spin from that moment and so he continued with writting lyrics and search for good sounds.

    “A lonely bird wanted to fly. But were could it possibly go?

   The sky’s too big, the ocean’s too deep.

   Maybe a ladder could help it climb

   But a small, small little bird easily falls”

This was today’s work. The words were taken right from the middle member’s heart. Sometimes he felt lonely, well sure he had friends but he’ve always seen himself like a odd person who stands out from the rest...a black swan. And with many dreams it were difficult to choose his place in life. This career was never something he ever would’ve imagine, especialy not when he didn’t come in to the SM Enterainment at the first shot. The boy could sing, dance and speak many languages, of course the quality of being a quick learner could come to be useful. Now Key had no regrets and he loved all of the others. Minho had gotten closer to him because of the reason they share the same bunk-bed, but now there was a small fear for sleeping in the same room. What to do?? Homophobia...could that be it? He tried to consider if all this might be okay but then this picture of Taemin and Jonghyun being girl’s pop up in his head. No,no,no,no!! No way in hell! He slided down the wall until he reached the floor then thumped his head against it. This didn’t make sense to him.

Minho went back to his dorm and got really surprised by what he founded at his window. There was Taesun with a white rose in his hand. When Flaming Charisma almost had reached the spot where Taemin’s older brother sat the other boy turned around to show his face. He handed over the rose with a small label on. There were only one person who had that handwritting, Taemin. “I’m sorry…”

To be continued...