When you're looking at her she seem rather plain, normal, or more like boring. Same expression everyday, every hour, every minute, every second. She doesn't stop. She's boring. She's mystical. What is her personality really like? Worthless Same expression, different personality. Tired eyes, bright smile, the expression.

HER expression. I mean her emotions, Her mood. What is her real feelings, is she always like that? Is she always thinking like that? Happy? Is she really happy? ''That girl is so bubbly, she probably haven't gone through hell.'' It itches, but she wanted them to think like that, but it itches so badly, she wanted to scream, ‘‘it's not true!''  But she held it inside, She smiled. Saying something funny about it instead, commenting, laughing. But, it hurt. Her feelings? What is really inside of her head? What is on her mind?

They hate me.  I'm ugly. Worthless. Stupid. Lonely. Hated, hated, hated. It's been a long time; so long she can remember it. Worthless. She's now a young adult. Worthless  But her childhood is stuck with her.

''I researched it!'' she whispered to her trusted one, the only person who knows a little of the truth. ''It all fits in!'' she added. The person lifted his left eyebrow and looked at the plain girl straight into her boring eyes. ''You're only imagining.'' he said with one tone, rather harsh. The worthless boring one played with her fingers, feeling a bit bad of her so called ''conclusions''

Her eyes wandered through the room, and left to stare at the people around her for a split second before awkwardly looking away. Bipolar? Bipolar? Bi..Polar? .. Happy, sad, excited, embarrassed, sad, happy, sad, happy, sad, sad, sad, sad, happy. Excited. Embarrassed. EXCITED. Sad, thinking, overthinking? Gone, maybe I should be gone.

Bipolar. Bipolar syndrome, ''I'm good!'' '' I can do this!'' .... BI..POLAR.. ''Why did I think I could do this. I .''  EMBARRASMENT. Hated? No.. Loved? Love- no.. Hated. Worthless. worth..less.. ‘‘With a personality like that, no one will like you.'' ‘‘You’re ugly.'' ‘‘Weak’’ ''running, you're just running away.'' ''It would be better if you're not here. LEAVE!!''  Hated. They hate me. HE hates me. It's my entire fault!

She ruffled her hair violently, while mentally slappin herself,  her eyes followed the clean movement the person in front of her was making.

She watched as his beautiful long fingers rolled the thin paper, he looked like a person who've done it his whole life, He wore a poker face and lit up the very edge of the now pipe shaped paper. She saw the pleasure making its way on his face as he was breathing in the nicotine and how his face softened up as it was dancing down his throat and crawling up against the walls of his entire lung.

He slowly breathed out the gray clouds while shaping his mouth in a circle, creating round halos on the air in front of her. She was crossing her arms trying to send of a feeling of disapointment. but he didn't even bat a eye. She had already researched it.  She's mentally sick, depression, Bipolar. Bipolar syndrome. Being with him wasn't going to make it better, But she was addicted.. No,

She IS addicted to him.