Suho x Luna

A/N Hi to all my subscribers! I'm so sorry for being absent for so long. A lot of personal things got in the way so I was lacking time to update anything for you guys. I'm all back again though! I'll be posting this story first while I work on an angsty one (this one is slightly angsty maybe, but not as much as the other one I'm working on), because I remember that has been requested before and I did not forget about it at all! If you have any more requests on pairings you like to see or on a setting for a story please don't hesitate to leave it in a message! ^_^

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Joonmyun had been tossing and turning in his bed for the last couple of hours. Even though he felt exhausted, sleep wouldn't come to him. There were too many thoughts going though his mind and he just couldn't make them go away to find to allow himself to fall asleep. Now that Luhan also left the group he started to think he might have failed as a leader. He was the one that needed to protect s, but over the last couple of months he realized he couldn't protect them against everything-- even how much he wanted to he couldn't. By now most of the k-pop fanbase knows their company was not the best one to say the least. They were like slaves that had to do what the company told them to do and make money for them. As leader he could only do so much to make things better for s. He feared for all of them, how much more could they take? How many more of their brothers will they have to lose? He felt the anxieity and despair building up inside of him. 

He needed to go out and get some fresh air. Laying here in his room made him feel trapped. Trapped with his thoughts. Nothing good would come from that. Overthinking will not make him feel any better. Actually nothing really could make him feel better at this moment. He slipped out of his bed, putting on his pants and grabbed a hoodie before he quietly made his way to the front door to exit the dorm. He wasn't really sure where he was going, but he would just go where his feet would take him.

Everything was so much  more quiet during the night. It made him feel a bit calmer, but also more alone. It is true what they say leaders are usually alone with their thoughts. Leaders usually don't want to bother the other members with thier feelings, because they are the ones that need to solve things for the other members and need to be there for them. They need to be the strongest. It gave a lot of pressure at times. 

Last minute he decided to get inside a subway station and get on the first and the best metro to take him away somewhere. He would get out on a random stop, somewhere where it was quiet and where he would be all alone. Though the streets were quiet yet there was always someone around and right now he was craving silence. He wasn't sure it would be that good for him. All he knew was he wanted to be alone, truly alone. Actually he was just scared to walk into a fan or more than one fan and he couldn't handle that right now. He felt sorry towards their fans as well. They must be hurting too.It pained him to know there was nothing he could do for s and fans to make their pain go away. 

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Sunyoung was having a horrible time falling asleep. Something was nagging at her and she wasn't quite sure what it was. F(x) performing as four was nothing new really. They have done it numoerous of times. Sulli taking a break was as if she just had a different schedule and couldn't make it to perform with them. It's never the same missing a member. Sulli was going to come back eventually-- or so she liked to hope. It still bothered her. There was alwaysa chance she didn't want to do this anymore and she will leave too. It made her wonder how the exo member must feel right now. She learned that Luhan wasn't going to come back anymore either and that made him the second person to leave Exo. She felt for them. She was always pretty sensitive to other people's feelings especially to those she cared for.

With a sigh she pushed off her blanket. Sleeping wasn't going to happen right now so she might as well get up and go for a walk. As soon as she put on some clothes she headed out the door. Maybe she should send Joonmyun a text tomorrow. As leader it must be extra hard on him. She wished she could be there for him as support. Not only as support but as someone to give him the love that he deserves. She still had feelings for him-- it became painfully clear to her when she saw him on their concerts. They usually tried to avoid each other. They tried to make it as less awkward as possible, but last time she wished she could have given him a hug. He looked like he needed one so badly. 

Sunyoung enjoyed the night time, she liked looking at the stars and the moon. Everything seems more peaceful during the night, even if you could hear some of the city sounds it was mostly quiet. There were almost no cars on the road, not too many people. It was a great time for idols to get out and take a walk or go on dates. She remembered how they would sneak out at night when they were still dating. It were such fun times and she missed these times a lot. It's hard to get over someone that is in the same company. Every time she thought she did it was just her mind playing tricks with her, because as soon as she saw him her heart would skip  a beat and there were butterflies in her stomach.

She stopped walking for a moment when she noticed she had actually walked into a subway station. She had been so consumed in her thoughts that she didn't even really payed any attention where she went and ended up here. She shrugged-- she might as well take a ride on one of the metro's and see where it would take her. It will be an adventure and she liked going on those-- most preferably with someone though. 

After passing a few stops she noticed someone sitting on a bench and he looked so familiar. Even with his hoodie up she could see blond bangs coming from under them. He was looking down, but something inside her told her it was Joonmyun. She quickly got out and walked up to the figure. What were the odds that it was actually him. He had been on her mind a lot-- not only today and now she saw him here on this deserted metro station, not really knowing where they were exactly.

"Joonmyun oppa?"

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Joonmyun had been sitting on the bench at this random station he decided to get out on god knows how long. Only here, so far away from everything and everyone he allowed himself to cry. He didn't like to cry in front of people-- Oh sure he has done it in front of s and on good occasions they would make fun of his ugly crying face. In this situation he just wanted to be strong for s, so crying alone here all by himself was the only option he got.

He lost count on how many metro's he had seen pass-- no one ever got out though. A sudden voice shocked him. "Pl-- please go away. Leave me alone." His voice was sounding hoarse. He didn't realize it was someone he knew and thought it might have been a fan. He kept sitting like he did, a bit hunched over, elbows resting on his upper legs while he either stared at his hands or the ground. Sunyoung didn't expect these words from him, but she figured she might have surpised him to actually realzie it waas her. "It's me, oppa. Sunyoung." She sat down next to him and slowly wrapped her arm around him. "What are you doing here all by yourself?"

It was a silly question really, because for some reason she had ended up on the exact same place as he did. He shrugged. "I couldn't sleep. Too many thoughts. So I went for a walk and ended up taking the metro and it got me here." She nodded a few times at his answer, even though he couldn't see her. "Hm." She gently squeezed his shoulder. That simple little gesture of hers made tears roll down his cheek once again. "Sunyoung... I just don't know what to do. How can I make things right?"

Sunyoung frowned a little. "There's nothing you can do, really. It's not your fault, oppa." It was obviously the company's fault and there was nothing they could do other than to support the desicion their friends were making. She sighs softly while moving closer to him. He was feeling cold-- almost icy cold and it made her wonder how long he had been sitting there. She slowly moved her legs and placed them over his lap while pressing her body closer to his, pulling him close to herself to make him feel warmer and to comfort him. 

He knew she was right. None of this was his fault and all he could do was sit back and support the desicions his friends-- his brothers were making for themselves. He knew they were better off like this. They were free to do what they want and not restricted like the company made them feel. He took in her scent when she pulled him closer to herself, resting his head against her shoulder as he tried to stay as close as possible. He only now realized he had been starting to feel cold-- nights were not as warm anymore now thet fall was approaching. She felt nice and warm though. "I know. I just don't want to lose more of them. That sounds selfish maybe, but we've been through a lot together so I just want us all to stay together. I don't know anymore though. Is this all worth it? I had to give up so much for this dream, friends, time with family---- you, and now it already starts showing cracks. I'm scared it might shatter someday. I never wanted to give you up, but I did it for your safety. The company already knew we were going to be popular among a lot of girls and I don't want you to get hurt or trouble when they would learn of us dating..."

She bit her lip gently resting her head on top of his head while rubbing over his arm. She really didn't know what to tell him. That things will be okay in the end? That's such a cliche thing to say and most of the time doesn't even really cheer someone up. "You've been doing great as leader. You hve to take care of eleven boys. Vic unnie sometimes goes crazy because of of us and we're only with five people all together. I'm really proud of you, oppa. No matter what the future brings you will be still an amzing leader. This will only make you stronger in the long run. As individual and as a group." She bit her lip more. He felt the same way as her-- it was hard to be together yet they both still wanted it to be. "Oppa....I--" She pulls away a little to look at him-- slowly leaning in more as they both stared into each other's eyes. The urge to kiss him was at it's strongest right in this moment, so she did. 

She leaned in more until her lips met his-- moving her lips against his, staying like this for a few minutes until they both pulled away. He seemed a bit surprised which made her giggle. "Why?" "I just thought you didn't want me anymore. That you were over me." She shook her head. "No, I still like you." There was no way i hiding her true feelings any longer. She still liked him and still wanted to be with him after all this time. It was crazy really, but it might be true what they say; you never lose feelings for someone you once loved. Whether they were good or not, you always felt something. Some peole might be better in hiding it or denying it.

Her answer had made his heart almost burst out of his chest. "Sunyoung, would you--- would you like to be my girlfriend again? Taeyeon noona and Baekhyun are together too and the fans are not even mad. We were together before so you know." He shrugs a little. "They might not be that upset about us dating after all. If you want though..." Maybe he spoke too much and too soon. He saw a smile forming on her face which only grew wider the more he said. "What?" She shook her head still that smile on her face. "I think it's cute how you talk so much when you get nervous. Of course I want to be your girlfriend again." She leans in to kiss him again. "Though I think we should go. I don't want you to get sick. You've been sitting here for quite some time, hm?"

He nods, he wasn't sure how long exactly-- he only knew it had been quite some time before she came. They stood up and he took her hand in his while they started to walk. It felt like the old times again. The only difference was that he was no longer a trainee for the rest everything was the same. The feeling he got when he was with her-- she truly made him feel hapier. A better person.

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They had the last metro back. He had taken her home and kissed her goodnight before he headed back to his own dorm. Things felt a little better. The anxiety and despair he felt before were not completely gone, but it was a lot more bearable. He had her warmth, her smile, her love-- her everything and that made him feel so much happier. At least something in his life went right at this moment. Now he felt he could be of better help to s as well-- give them more suppport while feeling a bit stronger again.

He gladly snuggled into his bed-- his eyes feeling heavier. He knew he was going to be able to sleep just fine now. Before he would let himself doze off though he took his phone to send her a text: "I love you, my cute puppy. Are you free tomorrow? We should go do something."

Sunyoung had ben waiting for his text-- the only reason why she was still awake. She smiled happily at his words and quickly texted him back: "I love you too, my cuddle bear. I am! As long as it's somewhere warmer~."