I pick up the note Umma wrote only hours ago. Her clumsy handwriting makes me giggle through my tears. 

 

"Dear Bummie, stop crying. I know you are, don't try to even convince me you are not. If you are reading this, I ended up leaving you. I am sorry, I said I would never leave you, yet I did. I have a request, you know like the lady's on their death bed in the dramas we used to watch. Become yourself, become the 'Key' we always talked about. Don't let your father bother you about it, I wrote him a note too, but I doubt that will do anything. I left the key's to my studio, and everything to you, it's all paid off, so live there if he can't leave you alone. I love you, Bummie. 

-Love Umma"

 

I lay the note down, I dry my tears and decide to do something that 'Kibum' would never do, but I want to do. I grab my car keys, and smile. I know Umma would hate that I was siting there crying. I drive a little to fast, and forget to use my blinker twice, but I don't get pulled over. I walk in the mall, I have only been here once by myself. It was not like I had friends to come with, but Umma would bring me, I didn't mind all the kids laughing because I had my mothers support. I go to the hair dresser, Umma and I would go to. The woman who always cuts our hair, comes over.

"Walk-in? That surprising, mister planner." She says. I roll my eyes off, and take my glasses off. She looks at me confused. I sit down in a chair, seeing as how she is not busy.

"So where's your Umma?, I have missed her, lately." The woman asks. To be honest, I feel happy someone cares about Umma more than feeling sad about her death. It's not that I am cold hearted, but I rather remember the good than the bad. Plus, I hate the depressed feelings I get.

"Umma finally died about six hours ago, give or take some time. Her cancer had been bad the past month." I inform her. She stares at my like I am crazy. She goes to open but I cut her off, "It's not like I don't  miss her, I just want to get started on what she asked on her death bed." The woman nods, not really understanding, but, whatever its not her business.

"The same?" She finally asks. I shake my head and explain that I want my dull brown hair bleached, and cut into something different that normal. She seems confused, but does what I ask. I sit there and hum. I watch a few people come make appointments, or get one of the other girls to cut their hair. I look in the mirror and smile. This is exactly what I wanted. I pay her with a ten dollar tip. It doesn't seem like much compared to what she did for me. I smile and leave. I go to a few stores, and by about three different shirts and five pairs of jeans. I get some foundation and eyeliner, as well as hair products. I get in my car and drive home. I think when I get back and at her funeral, I will allow myself to mourn. I see Appa's car in the driveway, I already know this is going to end badly. It always ends horrid with Appa if Umma is not around, and now she will never be around. I mentally slap myself for thinking like that. I know I will be depressed if I do, yet, I still can't stop myself. I grab my bags and go inside.