Leeteuk was slouched down at the computer. His chin rested in his palm as he stared at the screen. The repetitive sound of clicking was the only thing heard in the room, as he continued to punch the right arrow key on the keyboard in front of him.

 

The days following their meeting with the social worker had been hard ones. If Leeteuk wasn’t crying, he was moping around the apartment or sleeping.

 

Kangin was at a loss with what to do. There was nothing he could do within his power to give his husband what he wanted most and it killed him to see his heartbroken face everyday.

 

“Teuk-ah,” he called softly tapping on the door frame.

 

Leeteuk didn’t look back, he just continued to hit the button.

 

“What are you doing?” asked Kangin walking in and standing behind Leeteuk’s back.

 

He placed his hands on Leeteuk’s shoulders, massaging them as he focused on the images that were flashing across the screen.

 

Each picture was one of the four children they had been denied to adopt. Leeteuk stared blankly ahead as he watched their smiling and innocent little faces go by.

 

“We could have taught him how to ride a bike…we could have taken him to the zoo…we could have been there on her first day of school…we could have been there to help him ease away the pain,” said Leeteuk breaking down as he looked at the face of the last boy they had just tried to adopt.

 

Kangin stretched his arm down the length of Leeteuk’s and grabbed his hand, pulling his fingers away from the keys. Leaning over, he wrapped his other arm around Leeteuk’s chest and hugged him tightly.

 

“It’s just not fair! These were our kids!” he said as his shoulders heaved with each sob.

 

“I know, I know,” said Kangin holding him tighter.

 

“Why can’t they just give us a chance? Why can’t they just put their hate aside just once?” He cried as he closed his eyes.

 

Kangin allowed him to cry for a few minutes as he held his trembling body.

 

“Baby listen to me. I know you're hurting, because I’m hurting too. I am. But we have to keep ourselves and each other, together. We will be parents one day, I truly believe that. But we just have to wait for the right time and the right child. You have to tell yourself that the reason it hasn’t happened yet is because there’s some child out there, that will need us so much more than these other ones and that we’ll have to be ready for them when they need us.”

 

Leeteuk took in Kangin’s words as he tried to relax into the comfort of his hug.

 

“I know…it just hurts me that these poor babies have to suffer because of someone else’s beliefs,” sighed Leeteuk sadly as he sniffled, staring at the little boy’s face again.

 

“But think of the joy it’s going to bring that young couple. This is their time to start a family, and ours will be soon too, I know it,” said Kangin and he kissed Leeteuk’s head.

 

Leeteuk nodded as he rubbed his red eyes. Kangin released him from his arms and placed his hands back on his shoulders.

 

“How about we go out for a bit?” suggested Kangin.

 

“I don’t know,” said Leeteuk shaking his head dismissively.

 

“Come on, a little sunshine will be good for you. You’ll feel better, I promise,” smiled Kangin.

 

Leeteuk looked over his shoulder at Kangin and slightly laughed when he saw him still grinning.

 

“Fine, fine, just please don’t make that scary smile anymore,” said Leeteuk completely laughing now.

 

Kangin moved closer to Leeteuk, still smiling. Realizing he had no intention of stopping, Leeteuk dogged out of the way to avoid him, but Kangin kept moving closer.

 

“Ah! Hajima!” laughed Leeteuk as he now ran out of the room, still trying to avoid Kangin’s creepy smile.

 

                                                            ~~~

 

She tugged on the black sweatshirt, trying her best to hide her protruding belly. Turning from side to side, She tried her hardest to make it not obvious, but there was no way to hide an eight month baby belly.

 

Biting her bottom lip she sighed. Staying inside was just not an option anymore. So she put on her baseball cap really low, and grabbed her oversized tote bag, making sure to carry as much of it as she could across her stomach.

 

It was early evening as she walked outside of the dorm she had been living in for almost one year now. The sky was hazy as she walked down the street, keeping her eyes low to avoid anyone’s stares.

 

She walked all the way to the outskirts of campus and got onto the first bus that stopped. She had to get away from anyone who might know her.

 

                                                            ~~~

 

After having dinner at a quiet restaurant, Kangin and Leeteuk walked out and decided to take a walk around the neighborhood. The weather was particularly warm that evening for early spring time, but it was a nice departure from the frigid winter they had just finished.

 

As they walked along the streets, they saw families with one or two children jumping around as their parents tried their best to entertain their wishes.

 

Kangin slipped his hand into Leeteuk’s, pulling him close as they continued walking by.

 

‘I’m trying my best to not hate every parent out here,” said Leeteuk with a soft chuckle.

 

“I know, me too,” sighed Kangin with a smile.

 

“These are the parents we need to approach for adoption. They’d probably gladly hand one over,” said Leeteuk nodding towards one family who’s youngest was throwing a temper tantrum as the older sibling stood by annoyed while their parents tried to calm the baby.

 

“Huh!” Laughed Kangin. “If that’s our only option, I’m gonna have to put my foot down. We’ll get a dog instead, I’m sure it would be more well behaved any way.”

 

Leeteuk laughed as he smacked Kangin’s ribs. “Be nice! Even the brattiest of children has their sweet moments.”

 

“Hopefully we won’t have to find that out first hand,” said Kangin.

 

“No, our kid will be the greatest behaved, most loving and loved, smart and kind person this world has ever seen,” said Leeteuk as Kangin let go of his hand to put his arm around his waist, pulling him even closer.

 

“Well if they have you for an appa, I know they will be,” said Kangin and he gave Leeteuk’s cheek a kiss.

 

“Thank you yeobo,” said Leeteuk softly. “Oh, look, can we stop for a coffee and hot choco?”

 

They were stopped in front of a small coffee shop that they used to frequent often.

 

“Sure why not,” said Kangin and he opened the front door for Leeteuk and then followed him inside.

 

Once they had ordered their drinks, they sat down at a table near the window so that they could people watch as they drank.

 

Neither of them really noticed though when a young girl walked in with a black sweatshirt and a baseball cap pulled very low.

 

“Can I have a…hot chocolate please?” She asked softly not making eye contact with the cashier.

 

She was used to not doing that these days.

 

“5,600 won,” said the cashier after he entered her order.

 

The girl reached into her bag and pulled out a 5,000 bill and then searched for coins. The cashier began to grow impatient as She searched the bottom for coins. She pulled out two 100 coins, then another, and then two more.

 

“I need one more,” he sighed, now completely annoyed.

 

“I—I’m sorry, this is all I have,” She said motioning towards the money in his hand.

 

“Well then I guess you don’t have enough,” he said moving to give the money back to her.

 

“Please, I came a long way, I just really need a place to sit for a while and I really would like a hot chocolate,” she pleaded.

 

“Miss, you don’t have enough so you can’t— he started when suddenly a hand holding 10,000 won appeared over her shoulder.

 

Both her and the cashier stared the money and the hand.

 

“Here, I think this will cover it,” said Leeteuk gently shaking the bill so that the boy would take it.

 

“No!” She said shaking her head as she  turned around and looked slightly away from Leeteuk’s face. “Samchon, really it’s not necessary.”

 

“It’s fine,” said Leeteuk with a smile. “Enjoy your hot chocolate. They make the best here.”

 

The girl finally looked at Leeteuk as he took his change and then walked back to his table to finish his own hot chocolate.

 

She awkwardly scooped up her money and then walked to a table in the back, trying her hardest not to bring any more attention to herself.

 

When Leeteuk had returned to his table  Kangin was leaned back in his chair, with his hand resting across his mouth.

 

“What’s wrong?” asked Leeteuk as he looked at Kangin’s pose.

 

“That was really kind of you Teuk. It just really made me happy to see you help out a young girl like that, so selflessly.”

 

“Well I couldn’t sit here and let that boy embarrass her like that any longer,” said Leeteuk slightly blushing.

 

“And these are the moments I wish that asinine social worker could see,” muttered Kangin as he slowly shook his head.

 

“Let’s not talk about him,” said Leeteuk leaning forward as he slightly frowned.

 

‘You're right. Listen, we’ll find a new social worker, some one that will take us seriously, and we’ll try again soon, all right?”

 

Leeteuk nodded and then looked across the room at the girl.

 

She looked nervous, as if she felt someone was watching her every move. The café wasn’t crowded at all. There were only two other couples inside, but to watch her, you would think it was standing room only.

 

Kangin followed Leeteuk’s eyes behind him and saw him staring at the girl.

 

“Why are you staring at her?” he asked shaking his head.

 

“She looks so lonely…and terrified,” said Leeteuk frowning.

 

Kangin looked once again. “Well she’s clearly pregnant, although it looks like she’s trying to hide it and she is alone, so you’re probably right Teuk.”

 

“I wonder what she’s doing in this neighborhood. She seems too nervous to be comfortable with her surroundings,” mused Leeteuk.

 

“Maybe she’s just visiting friends or maybe she’s lost and just decided to come in off the street and clear her head for a minute,” shrugged Kangin.

 

Leeteuk continued to watch the girl as her buzzer suddenly went off, making her jump.

 

She scrambled to her feet and then waddled down to the counter where the impatient boy took her buzzer and pushed her drink towards her.

 

Giving a small nod of thanks, she cupped her mug and then slowly made her way back to her table.

 

“Teuk-ah, you’re staring. That’s probably going to make her even more uncomfortable than she is now,” said Kangin touching his arm.

 

“I know, I just…it’s a little heartbreaking Kangin-ah, she looks so helpless…maybe I’ll just go and—

 

“What? You want to go over and talk to her?” asked Kangin incredulously.

 

“I just want to make sure that she’s okay. She couldn’t buy herself a hot chocolate, maybe there’s a reason for that. Not to mention, like you said, she’s pregnant and there’s no man here with her. Isn’t that a little strange to you?”

 

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to go over and harass some young girl about her life story. Please don’t—

 

But it was too late. Leeteuk stood up and looked at the girl sitting in the corner of the room. He slowly made his way over to her table until he was standing right in front of it.

 

She jumped slightly when she realized he was there.

 

“Excuse me Miss? Hi. I don’t mean to bother you, but I thought maybe you could use someone to talk to. My name is Jungsoo, but you can call me Leeteuk. Is it alright if I sit down?” he said softly.

 

She swallowed hard before looking up at his eyes for one quick second. When she saw that they were genuine, she barely nodded.

 

Leeteuk pulled the chair out and sat down across from her as Kangin watched, speechless from the other side of the room.