I made up so many reasons just to avoid that Sugawara. I don’t hate her but in the same time I hate her. How can you conclude that? Simple, I hate her because……forget it. I don’t want to talk or think about her just to break my heart. No. Strictly no! The day has come. I don’t have any extra classes today since it is Saturday. I dressed up like having a date although today should be fake and just practice. Duh, of course I need to dress up properly so that Marius-kun will have the feel.

“Mom! I’m going now to meet my friend. I’ll be back after dinner!” I said putting on my shoes.

“Okay dear!” I heard mom reply. I ran out to the front door while my small purse was flying in the air as I held onto its string.

What should I do? I agree without thinking it properly and blindly accept whatever Marius-kun request. I regret for doing this. I felt so wrong. I shouldn’t be doing since Sugawara now belongs to Marius-kun. In the same time, I feel like avenging myself for letting Sugawara have him and punish myself to let go of Marius fall into Sugawara hands. I ran under the street light as it’s getting darker after the sun set. I like this moment. A romantic night, and nobody will disturb us and just enjoy the sound of water flowing and the crickets singing.

“Good evening, Marius-kun” I said, approaching Marius who was watching through the lights of the opposite city of Tokyo with his hands in his pockets. He stood still under the light that shined on his blonde hair. He turned around when my voice reached him.

“Rin-chan!!! Helllloooooo~” He opened his arms and ran to me. I moved away and he fell on the ground, turning his head and looked puzzled with my movements.

“Erkhem.” I faked a cough. “This will be our first date right, Marius-kun? I hope it will leave a good memory here, together.” I said. I acted differently from who I am. Marius-kun still looked puzzled with my words as he stood on his feet, correcting his attire.

I walked near to the cliff where I can get the brightest light. Marius-kun then stood next to me, admiring the beauty of the Tokyo Tower from here and the shining lights from every building that stands gorgeously in front of us.

“Yes. I hope so.” Marius-kun replied. He is getting into the roleplay. “So, Haruka-san. What are your favourite things? I mean, what do you like to do in your spare time?” he asked.

“Ermmm, I like to glance through on how I spend my time with my friend. Other than that, I like to play piano in the same time composing my own songs.”

“I see. The way you talk as if you came from a rich family background.” He chuckled.

“Ah-ha. I see. I just like doing things alone.”

“Let’s have a seat here. It is nice to have this pretty scenery and enjoy the cool breeze” He said, crossing his leg over the other.

“What do you like to do Marius-kun?” I asked him back. Everything was totally different. I treated Marius differently and he followed my lead. It was not the same as who we are.

“I like to play piano as well. Other than that, I like to do extreme activities.” He said.

“Such as?”

“Such as white rafting, flying fox, rock climbing, camping, rally, ride on a sport bike, riding horse, archery, and shooting.” He said.

“Really?” I was amazed at his activities. A few of them were the same as me. “I like horse riding, shooting and riding on a sport bike!” I said. The two of us broke into small laughter. Marius-kun glanced at his wrist watch and turned to me.

“It’s time for us to go. I will show you one of my favourite places.” He said and reached out his hand. I took his hand and we walked together along the recreation street. He brought me to a restaurant on a boat. There was nobody except the two of us. We went on board and we took a seat at the upper level. The place was very nice and I can see the city from a moving boat.

“It is spring but the weather for tonight is cold. Isn’t it?” He asked, resting his back at the railing while looking at me with his hands in his pocket.

“It is. It was a nice view to see our beautiful city.”

“I have a friend who taught me this. She said, girls do like romantic things even she can cry over a small thing when she feels it is romantic. So, I’m really grateful to have her as my friend.” He said, staring down to the brown parquet under our feet.

“How is she? You seemed to be very close with her.” I said.

“Yes. Very close. Everywhere I go I will think of her and always remember her advices. She taught me a lot. She is very special to me but I never take her as more than a friend. I’m afraid she will be uncomfortable when I’m around if I do that.” He said again. Suddenly, I feel my heart is shattering into pieces. Please, don’t cry here. We are just acting. I felt a sword is stabbing right into my heart, passing through my back bones.

“I see. She must be someone that is very important to you until you feel afraid of losing her. Isn’t it?” I said and flashed a smile. He didn’t reply but just a small smile formed.

“The food is served. Hope you enjoy.” He said and pulled out the chair for me. Our dinner tonight was acting but at the same time, I’m getting butterflies in my stomach. I feel it is going to be real and Marius-kun’s acting skill looks real. We are getting serious and this how it turned out for our practice before Marius-kun’s real date.

“The food is really nice!” I said.

“Really? This is one of my favourite places. I have been here every time I feel sad and lonely. I only bring special person here just to show that this is my place.” He said again. Haih, when it's his real date then he will bring Sugawara to this place again. I should be happy as I’m the first for him to show his favourite place. I will never be his more than a special friend. That will never happen and Sugawara is now officially Marius-kun’s girl.

After the dinner, I went to the railing again and calm myself while the wind brushes my skin. Today is the day where I will call cold spring. My unofficial date is on cold spring day and I don’t know what will happen for the next cold spring.

“Here. I hope you like it.” He said and flashed his famous smile to me. He showed a bouquet of flower with a bar of chocolate in between.

“Waaahh! I love chocolates! Thank you Marius-kun!” I said and slung my arms around his neck and  pulled into my embraces. He looked happy when I grabbed my chocolate from him. I thought I should stop this roleplay when Marius-kun already knows how to approach a girl. I taught him everything in my acting skills but suddenly he broke my hug and bent forward to reach my face. His eyes shut and our lips were a few inches away. What should I do? Should I stop or just continue? Haruka Rin! Decide now! Until then, I froze, do nothing, I swallowed hard and my mind was messed up.

“Oppp!” I said and placed my fingers on his forehead. “You have done a great job. Our acting is over.” I said and playfully smiled at him.

“Really? Wahhhh, I thought I have to kiss you for real” He giggled. “Your acting skill was fantastic! I thought it was a real date. Everything became so serious! Arigatou Rin-chan!!!!” He thanked with his high-pitched voice and hugged me like a cat, his face on mine. Okay….

I didn’t go to school for a few days after that night. I have something urgent that has to be settled straight away when I came back to school. I saw Marius-kun had been sending missed call for more than 10 but I can’t call him back. I was too busy preparing myself.

The next day, I went to school as usual. I was passing the principal’s office but then, I heard a familiar voice. “Yes. I came here because I have a few friends studying here. I don’t feel enjoy with my previous school.” He said. Wait, this voice. I waited for him to come out of the principal’s office not far from the door. A few seconds after that, he came out with a secretary.

“Rin-chan?!” He looked shock when he saw me in front of him.

“Sato Shori?! What are you doing here?” I asked. Why?! Why'd I have to meet him, here?! Shori’s presence make his the topic of the day. Yeah,yeah. I know. He is one of the beautiful guy because of his handsome face. Snap it out! This is not the time to think like that. I’m talking why I’m meeting my ex-boyfriend here?!

“Ah, good to see you here Haruka. Sato Shori will be placed in your class.”

“WHAT?!” NO! Not in my class! Asdfghjkl. I was about to delete him from my past but now I have to face him again?!

“It is from the upper’s order.” Said the secretary. “Since you are already here. Bring him to your class before recess time over.” She said and left Sato Shori and I alone outside of the principal’s office. No, I mean not just the two of us but still he knows me and I know him so yeah, considered as the two of us.

I have to bring him with me. OH MA GAWWDD. While on our way, suddenly Shori spoke up first. “Rin-chan, it has been awhile after that day.” He started. “And, I kinda missed you.” What?

“I thought we are totally over. You went to the best school and why do you have to apply here?” I asked.

“I came here because I want to go to school with you. I don’t find it is interesting a few couple of weeks although my group of friends was there. I just want to be with you. I regretted for asking a break up from you. Thinking of long distance relationship will never work but I don’t feel that way. Can we just start all over again? I will take as a yes if you don’t reply” he said. I don’t know whether to say it a yes or a no. I just don’t know how to react.

The next day, I went into the school compound and saw two girls were talking to him. Shori looks hot from behind with our school uniforms. His style of putting his hands into his pockets has never change. “Sato-kun, I really like you. Will you go out with me?” the girl put his palms together waiting for Shori’s answer. “Yes Sato-kun, she really likes you.” Her friend said. But then I saw Shori sighed, “Sorry, I have someone else already. You can ask another guy  to go out.” He said and left the place. The girl who confessed burst into tears after being rejected. Woah, are you serious Shori?

Shori is gaining his popularity lately. Marius-kun and Shori are now top the most popular in our school. I’m not jealous of what but recently Sugawara is famous for girls. And plus, she is in a relationship with Marius-kun. “Rin!” someone called. I turned around and saw omg that again but this time someone that is precious to me followed her behind.

“……….?”

“Rin-chaaaannnnn!!” Marius-kun ran, hugging me like his usual hugs. Take that ! Now your boyfriend is hugging someone else! To my surprise she is not shocked after all. I mean she didn’t show any kind of disgrace but I don’t care as long as Marius-kun takes me first than her.

“Rin, I heard you have a new classmate today. Can you show us who is he? Is he handsome?” Sugawara chuckled earning a glare from Marius-kun.

“I don’t know. Why don’t you look for yourself. I’m not sure where he is.” I replied. And by the way, where did Shori go? I haven’t seen him anywhere when the bell rang.

“Okay then. See you later Rin-chan.” Marius-kun waved and Sugawara left me with her smile. Qwertyuiop, I hate to see Marius-kun with her. Just, gah! I should have just let Marius-kun kiss me that night. Muehhehehehe…

As I was walking at the corridor, suddenly I saw Marius-kun through the window. He cupped his hands around Sugawara’s cheeks and she slung her arms around his neck as Marius-kun bend forward, reaching for her lips. My eyes widened but then a strong grip from behind turned me around. I faced a broad chest with a hand at the back of my head. I was still shocked at the view I was watching before until it make me fall on my knees.

I can’t say anything. I feel pain in my chest, thumping to its max as if it is going to explode and die without any reason. I recognise this body. Its shape belongs to someone I know. Someone I used to hate before. Someone that I have forgotten for a second after I met Marius-kun. I’m hoping that I can control everything inside me but this time, my eyes formed a crystal clear liquid at the edge of my eyes. It rolls down to my cheeks without anybody stops it.

“I’m sorry for being late.” Shori said, to my hair, hugging me tightly as I buried my face into his firm chest.

“There is nothing have to do with……….with  y-you.”

Shori brought me up and we walked back into the building. My eyes were swollen in red, people who look at me will think that I’m a vampire. But I don’t care what people will say until I can make up my mind to calm myself first. Unfortunately I met the couple who came across from the other corner.

“Rin-chan! Eh? What happen to you? Why are your eyes red? Are you sick?” Marius-kun asked, both of his hands held my arms. Can.You.Just.Go.Away? If possible don’t see me at this time.

“Please don’t disturb her. She needs her time to recover.” Shori said, letting go of me from his hands.

“Oh. Okay. Tell me if she is alright after that.” Marius-kun said again. No. I will not be alright. It will stick in my head for a long time and it will cause my heart to shatter like broken shards.

The next day I didn’t go to school. The clock almost struck to noon and suddenly I heard, “Rin-chaaaannnnn!!!!!!! We came to visit you!!!!” Marius-kun? I poked my head out of the window and saw Shori was right next to him and glad to say that, that is not around.

“We will go upstairs. You don’t have to come down.” Shori said. They went to my room and took a seat at the edge of the bed. “I brought a set of nutritious porridge for you. I cooked them by myself.” Shori said again.

“Oh, thanks.” I said and took the porridge bowl from him.

“Never mind, I will help you.” He took back and opened the cap. Marius-kun was there and watched all of Shori’s movements innocently. Shori fed me with his porridge and it taste very good. I didn’t know that he was a good cook. He changed a lot.

“I didn’t know the two of you were lovely birds.” Marius-kun interrupted. He flashed his famous smile again and that makes my heart deflate. We are not.

“I will make some hot chocolate for Rin-chan. Marius, please take care of her for a while.” Shori said and excused himself.

“Ahhhhhh~”

“I can do it by myself Marius-kun.” I said and snatched the bowl from him.

“No. You are sick. I will do this for you.” He snatched back. Well, okay fine. This is my opportunity to have some lovely moments with him. A few seconds after that, he asked about the practice the other day.

“Rin-chan, I don’t think I will apply what we have practice the other. I don’t feel the same way with what I have done to Sayuri. I just……don’t feel it right.” He said.

“You mean? You missed out something?”

“No. I don’t apply everything on the same time but I just feel like keeping the tips for someone else.” He said. What is he talking about? I don’t get it. “Maybe I just don’t know or maybe I don’t like her truly yet.”

Shori’s POV

I was holding a tray with hot chocolate on it. Suddenly I heard a serious talk among Marius and Rin. “Maybe I just don’t know or maybe I don’t like her truly yet.” That is what I clearly heard from Marius mouth. It was quite shock for me when he said that but then I saw a glimpse of shadow from the corner of my eyes. I turned around and saw Sayuri was looking down to her feet. She heard everything. She heard everything that Marius had said. When she saw my presence, she quickly wiped her tears and ran down the stairs. I put aside the hot chocolate and ran after her. She was sitting at the stairs while watching the sprout small garden. I went to her and took a seat.

“I guess you have heard what I have heard.” I said looking into the sky.

“That can’t be help.”

“Maybe they were fated to be together. Not to say this to ruin your relationship with Marius but I have to say that we both are clapping with one hand. It was clearly seen when Marius said that and he saying it for serious. While my case, I was Rin-chan’s past. I have dated her for over 2 years. I came back just to take her back with me but I didn’t expect that Marius has opened her heart.” I said. It was painful to say this but at least it will be better than keeping to itself.

“I realised that. Marius-kun hasn’t chosen which path he should use but the answer was already there. Everything that he does was a fake. He did it on purpose just to make me happy. I can see that he likes Rin-chan more than me but he never say. He really says he wants to protect me and will not hurt me but his heart never agrees with it. His movements were clearly said.”

“I guess it is time for me stop from butting into their lives. It is up to you after this but mine is almost time.” I said and stood up, making my way to Rin-chan’s bedroom.