You're about 23~26 years old, and you have some kind of heart disease. You've been in and out of the hospital since high school, so you don't have a GED or diploma, and you're in the hospital now waiting for a donor heart. Your hobby is sketching. Donghae is your doctor, this is an alternate universe where Donghae is not a part of Super Junior, but Donghwa is. And yes, they're brothers in this story, too, just you fail to realize it somehow. Donghae (the choding) is your doctor, what did you do wrong in your last life~? And yes, even if Bonamana technically came out in 2010, Jaedelle is bending facts and saying it came out in 2012-2013ish for this.

A Failing Heart

You stare at the IV drip, boredly counting the drops. You stare at ceiling, almost hoping to find dead bugs in the lights so you could count them, but there's none there; the cleaning staff are very thorough. You stare out the window and watch the leaves outside fall. Your attention moves to the TV and you see your favourite idol group performing on Music Bank, and let out a little squeal. Then you realize the time; Dr. Lee will be making his rounds soon. You sigh, sitting up and grabbing your sketchbook from the nightstand as your favourite member's dance and vocal solo begins.

"What kind of present should I buy, buy, buy, buy for you? Oh, I'm going crazy just thinking of how you'll be happy."

And you begin sketching Lee Donghwa, your ultimate bias, as the song continues, glancing up every now and then at the monitor.

"Listen, Girl."

"I like you."

"Baby girl."

"I love you."

"I'm the only man for you."

"Please listen to my confession."

"Hey, you're pretty good," you jump slightly as a stethoscope cord suddenly enters your line of vision, swinging under your nose. "So you like him the best, eh? Me too." Donghae smiles warmly and laughs as you slam your sketchbook shut, feeling embarrassed.

"Teacher, please don't sneak up on me like that," you stammered.

"What kind of present should I buy, buy, buy, buy for you? Oh, I'm going crazy just thinking of how you'll be happy," he sings, sounding exactly like Donghwa. Obviously, he's teasing you again by mimicking your bias' dance moves while offering you the end of the stethoscope.

You want to roll your eyes, but you find yourself smiling and amused. Donghae made each day in your hospital stay interesting. At first, you were annoyed whenever he mimicked your ultimate bias, but now, since it's been such a long time, you've gotten used to it, even started to appreciate it. And maybe it's because you're sick, but you're beginning to think Dr. Donghae looks exactly like Donghwa. Even their names are similar. You look between the screen and the doctor as he checks your blood pressure, seeing more and more similarities between the idol and the man that's been taking care of you for the last few years and frown.

"Cheer up, kiddo," he chuckles when he sees your frown and ruffles up your long, dark hair. You glare up at him and he laughs again.

"Teacher, you messed up my hair," you growl.

"Again," he completes your sentence with glee. "I'll stop when you stop making me feel old by calling me 'teacher.' I'm younger than your Donghwa-oppa, you know. So you should call me o--"

"Lee Donghae-ajusshi," you accented the word 'ajusshi,' and he pouts. You stare at him for a few seconds, wondering how the mentally-five-year-old boy got into a top medical university so early and graduated at the top of his class a year before his peers. You laugh as he begins to dance Sorry, Sorry next to you and call him oppa to make him stop pouting while dancing and making a scene in the hospital.

"Teacher--" you stop as he reaches for your hair. "Donghae-oppa . . ."

"Yes~?"

"You really look like Donghwa-oppa, and maybe it's because I'm sick . . ."

He smiles. "Of course, it's because I'm handsome."

"No, you really do look and sound like him, maybe I'm going crazy . . ." you say sleepily.

"Or you're just a bit tired," he says gently, tucking you in. "But yeah, I get that a lot, even from our mum."

"Did you get some work done to look like him or something?" you mumble, slowly falling asleep.

"Why would I get work done to look like my brother?" you think you hear as the world gets blissfully dark.

" . . . stable now. Good job as usual, Dr. Lee."

"Thank you, sir." You hear Donghae talking to another doctor as you wake up.

"Oh, morning," he says cheerily, but something about his smile seems forced today.

And you notice that there's more needles in your arm today.

"Sorry, I noticed your blood pressure was a bit low for the last few days and your condition was worsening," Donghae says quietly. "So I kind of distracted you after switching your IV drip with this--" he points at a now-disconnected medicine bag. "While you were sketching."

The words and somber tone that he was using now don't register in your brain.

"I'm sorry, but we still haven't found a donor for you--"

You begin to turn to look at the heart monitor, but Donghae stops you, forcefully turning you to face him and hugging you tightly. His eyes were a little bleary. Why?

"I swear I will find a heart for you," he says, eyes burning. "I won't let you die." And with that, he leaves you to check on other patients and another specialist comes in to talk to you about possible alternatives and end of life matters.

More days pass, and those days become whole months and seasons. You watch the trees lose their brightly colored leaves and snow luxuriously coat the world outside. You spend many days sleeping, feeling more tired and numb as each day passes, since Donghae no longer checks up on you. You watch the snow melt into spring as your new doctor tells you they've secured a heart and scheduled you for surgery.

And then the day before and of the surgery, you spend dreaming about Donghae-oppa. He was running around with someone who looked a lot like him, happy and smiling the whole time. When they notice you standing there, he keeps smiling as his look-a-like approaches you.

You wake up and nearly have a heart attack when you see Lee Donghwa fast asleep in a chair next to your bed. He stirs upon hearing you yelp, and you see that his eyes are red and puffy, much like when he delivered a speech when his group won the Mutizen award for their single, You. He stretches and yawns, looking a lot less graceful than he did when he was on stage.

"Hey squirt, how are you feeling?" Donghwa asks, his voice so similar to Donghae's that it makes your chest feel tight. When you just stare at him with wide eyes he sighs and scratches his head. "Aren't you supposed to be my biggest fan?" You stare at him like he's growing more heads by the second as he begins dancing his part in Bonamana, offering you a stethoscope and rosary instead of a rose. "My little brother wanted you to have these."

"Pardon? Is your little brother a doctor?"

Donghwa smiles sadly. "He was. And he was your biggest fan."

"But I'm not famous, why would I have a fan?" You clutch at your chest as it feels like it's about to explode.

"Donghae really liked you a lot," Donghwa fluffs out his cheeks, looking at the ceiling. "Please take care of his heart."

END

20130725 - Yay, Donghae's installment done. Apologies for typos and choppiness. To clarify, Donghae passed away at the end and ended up donating his heart to keep you alive.

20130727 - minor grammar, content, and alignment fix, the fact that the bottom part of the story wasn't aligned was bugging Jaedelle & disturbing my sleep -.-

20130817 - minor word change