Chapter 4
Letters to Juliet
The very next morning, I had breakfast alone in the buffet area. I picked up my sausage and took a bite before resuming my writing. Yes, day and night - whenever I could find free time, I'd pick up my book and start writing. Peace and quiet. Just the sound of nature. I looked at my tea before taking a sip. As I put the cup down, I saw two short legs in my view. I glanced up seeing an obvious nervous smiling Taeyeon. I put my pen down and stared at her in a weird way.
"Good morning!" She said, cheerfully.
"Good morning."
I saw that she was holding some kind of a reddish object in her hand. She saw where my eyes were and showed the object. It was a red apple. "Do you want it?" She asked.
"No.. you can have it." I smiled.
She scratched the back of her neck before taking a huge bite on the apple - making all puffed up. I giggled silently at her face before continuing to write.
After she swallowed that huge chunk of apple, she said, "Grandma wants to sleep in today. She must be tired."
"Is she okay? I mean, does she need anything?" I asked - immediately concerned about her.
"Oh no need, she's a tough lady. Even if she wanted anything, she would insist on getting it herself." Ahh, Jeanne. A strong woman.
Taeyeon then made a lame joke about her grandma that left me staring ridiculously at her. She coughed awkwardly. She was still standing up the whole time she was talking to me. I didn't care to offer her a seat since I didn't want her ruining my quiet time. Just when I thought she was going to leave, she spoke up again.
"So I thought it would be nice to go around town for today since there's nothing to do." She said - giving me a cheeky smile.
"That's a good idea." I said blankly - clicking my pen each time to get her annoyed.
"Well, I suppose you want to.. keep on writing." She pointed at my journal. I took a small glance at my journal before looking up to her again. "Work, work, work." She said. She flashed a smile that made me think about whether I should continue writing or not.
I just stared at her without muttering a word.
I guessed she sensed that I was feeling uncomfortable. "Right.. of course then. C-Carry on." She said before leaving.
"Taeyeon." She looked behind so quickly.
"Since we're here..." I closed my journal and grabbed her hand. We walked to the car - holding hands. I didn't realize we were until she let go of it to get to the driver seat. Well, that's awkward.
***
We drove to town for some sight-seeing. After about 20 minutes, I knew we reached since the place was swarming with people. Some tourists, some locals. It was a huge space where there stood a tall building. It looked like some sort of monument.
"You know, they said this place is famous for their ice cream. Wanna give it a try? It's on me!" She offered with a cheeky smile again. This time, I couldn't resist it.
I pinched her chubby cheeks and said, "Sure thing."
While walking to the ice cream stall, we had a small talk that was quite a big thing for us. Since our relationship started off in a really rocky path.
"I hate to compliment you but uh.. what you're doing for Jeanne is really nice and sweet. I honestly imagined you spending your holiday somewhere else.. so did you volunteer to do this or did you parents asked you to do it? I mean, where do they fit in?" I asked. She looked down on the road.
"I'd like to think they're in some place nice." She looked at me while walking down a slope - side by side. I just looked at her, waiting for her to continue. "They were killed in a car accident when I was ten." She smiled bitterly. I stopped walking. She stopped too but just a couple of steps ahead of me.
"I'm sorry.. I'm really sorry." I grabbed her arm and held it - as a way of consoling her.
"Thank you Jessica. I appreciate it." She said sincerely before tapping the back of my hand, telling me that she was okay. "It was a difficult time... my grandmother lost her son. I lost my parents. That's why I'm not a big believer in happy endings, unfortunately. Anyway, after that grandma stepped in - took an angry obnoxious girl under her wing and made me the simply unpleasant woman I am today." She said. I smiled at her sentence.
***
The bells were chiming as we walked into a big open area. The heart of the beautiful town. Many people were there - couples smooching, families laughing together, friends teasing each other. A cheery atmosphere. I was walking silently, admiring the buildings that looked so unique and fascinating at the same time. Until Taeyeon spoke up.
"So isn't your fiancee starting to feel rather lonely?"
"You know, I doubt Yuri even notices that I'm gone. She's having the time of her life right now. What about you? Don't you have a special someone?" I asked - feeling rather curious.
"That. Is a very, very long story." She said.
"Yeah? Well, I'm not surprised." I smirked at her. She smiled at the ground and shrugged it off.
We continued walking while she talked about her past lover. Sunny was her name.
"It's been a year since I last saw Sunny." She exhaled loudly.
"So you were the one who did the dumping? Well, that's a shocker." She stopped walking and stared at me ridiculously. She did not move for about 5 seconds. I stared back at her - not even blinking.
"Are you implying that I'm more of the type to be dumped instead of doing the dumping?" It took quite awhile to register her confusing sentence in my head. Slow Sica is slow.
I nodded positively.
"Well I hate to break it to you, but yes, I did break up with Sunny." She continued walking.
We walked and walked until we reached the ice cream shop. There were so many flavours to die for. I couldn't pick one, and of course, Taeyeon being the impatient one decided to pick for me. Which was Vanilla. At least she knew my taste.
"Why did you pick vanilla for me?" I asked her.
"You look like a vanilla person. Just saying." She said. She walked out of the shop after paying at the cash counter. She found a place to sit so that we could enjoy our delicious ice cream in peace. I didn't know she liked strawberry flavoured ice cream though. She looked like more of a chocolate person. Oh well.
She pulled out a chair and wiggled her to get comfortable on the chair. I chuckled silently at how dorky this girl could be. We sat there in silence - indulging our ice cream.
"Can I see your journal? If you don't mind." She looked at me with those eyes.
"...Why?" I asked her - squinting my eyes in a judging way.
She giggled and said, "For fun. It's okay if you don't want to." She smiled.
I couldn't resist. God dammit, Kim Taeyeon. What are you doing to me? "Fine." I said. I moved my sling bag and dug into my bag for my journal. She immediately snatched it away from me when I managed to take it out. She lifted an eyebrow a couple of times - proud of her lame accomplishment.
She opened the book and read with full concentration.... while her ice cream.... in a... seductive way. Is it wrong that I couldn't help but stare at her lips? And when the tip of her tongue touches the ice cream... Wait, what am I thinking?!
"Alright, that's enough." I said - attempting to get my journal back. She moved away, still wanting to read my journal.
"Seriously, enough." I reached out again, only to have my hand pushed away. I forcefully took away the book and did the same thing she did to me. The eyebrow thing. I obviously failed and it made her laugh. That laugh.
"But really.. your writing is really good." She said after her laugh subsided.
"Thank you." I said - blankly.
"No! It's really really good." She said louder - leaning forward at the same time with her shoulders slightly above her neck.
I frowned. Did she think it was going to be that bad? "Why are you so surprised?" I asked.
She just looked at me with wide open. "How come you never show your work to anyone?" She asked.
"Because I never feel like it's finished. I guess I'm just an ordinary perfectionist." I shrugged it off before taking a of my ice cream.
"You know that's just another way of saying 'I'm a coward', right? Listen. You've got nothing to be afraid of. You've got talent! You're a writer!" I smiled mockingly before smudging my vanilla ice cream all over her face.
We both chuckled loudly - attracting a few people that were around us.
"What was that for?" She said while chuckling.
"I'm not a coward." I said - grinning.
"And I'm not a nice person." She said before poking my nose with her ice cream. I look at her - shocked that she would actually do that. How did we become so comfortable with each other even though we fight most of the time? I disregarded that thought as I took a tissue and wiped my stained nose.
After all our laughs died down, "Do you think we should get back to your grandmother?" I asked. She nodded - thinking it was a good idea too.
***
The next morning, we continued our usual activity. Finding him. We went all around town and still the same result. Nothing. Seeing Jeanne approach old men awkwardly was fascinating though.
As we were finding for the 10th Sueroz of the day, the map showed us to a very secluded area. It was filled with trees. It felt like a green glob just vomited all over the area. However, there was a mansion. A beautiful mansion. As we reached the gate, we saw the name of the owner on a gold plate. The name, "Sueroz".
Jeanne looked so excited as her one true love might be a very successful man. We rang the gate bell and shortly after that, a woman came out of the mansion and stood near the gate - she was wearing a neat costume. We all assumed that it probably was a maid. She had a slight accent when she tried to communicate with us.
"May I help you?" She asked Jeanne.
"I'm looking for Sueroz.. Is there a chance that he might be in right now?" Jeanne asked with pleading eyes. Heck, even I would fall for those puppy eyes.
She looked at us with a confused face - as though she was judging us to the max. She cleared and took out a notebook that she kept in the pocket of her skirt. She also took a pen from the right side of her hair. She probably stuck it there so it would be convenient for her. She started writing down an address that was close by to this mansion. She slipped the paper through the tall gates and wished us luck. Why? We didn't know.
As we were driving to that area, Taeyeon kept looking at me and grinning ear to ear whenever we made eye contact. Jeanne unexpectedly saw her and smacked the back of her head and said, "Concentrate on the road. I am old but I don't need to die now." I smirked.
After a few minutes of Jeanne nagging her granddaughter, we finally arrived at the address that was given to us.
My heart shattered into pieces when I realized where we were at.
A cemetery.
The fear that we all had came true. I could see Taeyeon raging on the inside and would burst anytime. Jeanne was just standing in front of the tombstone. One particular tombstone. Sueroz. But I knew, it was not him. There was still 2 left. And I am positive it is not him. Jeanne looked calm. Really calm.
Taeyeon suddenly looked at me. Eyes full of anger and... just scary.
"This is what I feared most." I saw her clenching her teeth.
"Taeyeon, we don't even know if it's him." I said in a soothing tone.
"I HOPE IT'S NOT. I hope it's not." She kept repeating it. Getting angrier and angrier. "Either way, we're finished." She said - all of a sudden.
"NO! Not here! Not when we're so close to finding him." I said - marking my words.
"Well, w-when do we stop?" She stammered angrily. "Over the next hill, the next state, the next country?! No. NO! It ends here and that's final."
"There are a couple more of Sueroz that are not far from here. We can still do this. Please." I said.
"IT'S NOT THE ENDING YOU WANT, ISN'T IT?! THIS IS NOT A CLEVER STORY WITH A CLEVER ENDING! IT'S OUR LIVES! IT'S MY GRANDMOTHER'S LIFE! SHE'S ALREADY LOST A MAN ONCE. HOW MANY MORE TIMES WOULD YOU HAVE HER LOSE ONE? You know what, I don't expect you to understand any of this because you don't know a SINGLE THING about losing someone dear to you."
I gulped the lump developing in my throat. Losing someone? Of course I do.. My mother. I didn't want to mention anything, so I just walked away. I went out of the cemetery and entered the car. I wiped my tears away and took a deep breath.
-In the cemetery-
NO POV
"You're wrong Taeyeon.." Jeanne spoke up. "Jessica's mother ran away from her when she was just a little girl.."
"It's different, granny. You know it." Taeyeon said - suddenly growing guilt for the harsh words she said to Jessica. "It's different.." Taeyeon repeated.
Jeanne walked up to Taeyeon and cupped her cheeks in a loving way. "You're right." Jeanne said. "Jessica's mother chose to leave her.. and you know your parents loved you very much. They didn't plan to leave you. It was all unexpected. But for Jessica... it hurts more." Taeyeon looked at the ground.
She screwed up this time.
***
SICA'S POV
It was a gloomy morning for me. I knew I didn't have enough sleep. I stretched my arm to get my phone that was on the table to my right. It was too early for me to get up. I needed sleep. But who could sleep, after hearing such harsh words? It felt like bullets. Going through my body as if I was invisible. I kept repeating the scene in my head. Her eyes filled with anger. My eyes filled with tears. It hurt even more when I realized how our friendship was slowly building, but of course it all came tumbling down. After yesterday, I knew I should not let my guard down.
I heaved a long sigh as I strecthed my body and looked out the window. The sun was just staring at me - like it was telling me to get up and not just sit lifelessly on the bed. I got up, took a shower and decided to have breakfast. Alone. Jeanne did tell me that she was too tired to do anything so we decided to take a day off.
I wore a spaghetti strap dress and flats. I tied my hair into ponytail and applied light make-up. As I stood in the elevator of the hotel, many questions filled my head. Mostly about Yuri. We've stopped communicating with each other for at least a week already. I decided to send her a sweet morning text.
The elevator dinged. I stepped out and cursed when I saw a familiar face. Speak of the devil. I saw Taeyeon and Jeanne eating together. I made eye contact with Jeanne and smiled at her. I could see Taeyeon moving about and trying to get my attention but I tried hard to ignore her. As I approached them, I saw Taeyeon slightly flustering. Jeanne smacked her head, pinched her hand and mumbled something to Taeyeon.
There was an extra chair next to Taeyeon. Taeyeon immediately stood up and pulled the chair for me. I sat down uncomfortably - looking at Jeanne who was opposite me for answers on Taeyeon's sudden change of behavior. Jeanne winked at me and gave me a smile before excusing herself to take a morning walk. I looked at Taeyeon who sipped her orange juice before placing the glass on the table - awkwardly.
I was sitting there for almost 10 minutes and still nothing. I stood up - as I already finished my breakfast and was ready to leave.
"Jessica!" She said and grabbed my hand - pulling my back to my seat. "I'm sincerely sorry about yesterday, Jessica. It won't happen again. I promise." I stared at her.
"Don't make promises you can't keep, Taeyeon." I said - calmly.
She smiled before saying something. "I am wrong and I'm sorry. I'm hot tempered. I'm stupid. I annoy the crap outta you. I hurt you all the time while we were going through this journey, I enjoy every second being with you. You may find that slightly ridiculous but yes, it's the truth. Although I'm all that, I can tell you that I keep my promises. No matter what. I promise, Jessica - that it won't happen again. We might argue. I can't promise a perfect friendship" I smiled at the last word. "But I sure will, try to work it out."
She exhaled loudly when she saw my smile.
"I guess we're okay then?" She said - plucking a grape from the center of the table before popping it into in a cool way. Well, at least she thought it was cool.
"Why not?" I said to her.
Jeanne came back all of a sudden with an expression that looked like a satisfying grin to me. "Well, my work here is done then. I shall head to my hotel room for a quick nap." She brought her hands together before walking off - skipping happily. I giggled silently but all Taeyeon could do is facepalm at how dorky her grandmother can be.
We then went back to our rooms for a nap.
***
It was around 8 at night when I stepped out to enjoy fresh air in the hotel's garden. I looked at the sky while walking to the heart of the garden. The stars were shining brightly in the sky - as if it was winking at me. There were a few people scattered around the garden. Some near the fountain, some under the trees.
Unexpectedly, I saw Taeyeon there - lying on the grass just staring at the sky. I could tell that she was trying to count the stars with her forefinger but failed miserably as there were too many.
I approached her which obviously startled her.
"May I join you?" I asked.
"Please do." She said - fixing her shirt before placing both her hands under her head. I laid down next to her. It was a beautiful sight. No wonder she looked lost.
"I am sorry, Jessica." She looked at me. I looked back at her. We both held eye contact for quite a while before I smiled and focused my attention back on the twinkling stars. I didn't want to think about the fight we had. It was not a healthy topic. Instead, I answered her in a different way.
"I used to lay on the roof of my house just to see the stars during summer time. I thought the stars were balls of fire." She chuckled when I said that.
We sat in a comfortable silence. It was no longer awkward for us.
"Do you think he's out there? Our Sueroz?" She asked - looking at me.
"Yeah." I answered immediately. "I'd like to think he was somewhere, at least." I looked at her. She looked away.
"And am I wrong if I wanted my grandmother to quit?" She asked - seriously.
I sighed. "No, you're not. We can't possible go on forever. It will eventually come to a stop. Maybe one day but definitely not soon." I said, confidently.
"And why is it I feel like a schoolgirl on a Sunday?" I looked at her confusingly. "It's tomorrow but I just don't wanna go." Oh, I get it. I smiled while fiddling my fingers.
I looked at her in the eye and said, "I've always liked school." We both giggled. I saw her eyes looking through mine. It slowly moved down to where my lips were. I instinctively leaned in - looking at her lips too. Then, I felt it.
Her lips on mine.
It started off with a light one but ended up being passionate. We moved our lips in unison. She nibbled on my lower lip before it - seeking for entrance. I grabbed her cheeks and pulled her closer, despite our awkward position. I slowly moved to straddle her - our lips never breaking apart. I opened my mouth slightly, letting her tongue glide into my mouth. She placed her hands on my hips as my hands were caressing her cheeks. She slowly brought one hand to the back of my head, bringing us closer until there was no space left. It felt like magic.
I backed away when Taeyeon touched my cheek. A thing that Yuri would always do.
Yuri.
I moved away from Taeyeon. She sat up and looked at me with a concerned face. I stood up and just walked away. I didn't even look behind as I tried to control my feelings. Yuri. Taeyeon. Yuri. Taeyeon.
What's happening to me?
A/N: I wanted to end this chapter with the fight between Taengsic but nahh~ the kiss scene was quite fast. Why? Because I want to keep this story 10 chapters or below as I have another story in mind. But I'll only start writing that if this story has good feedback. so yeap :) and oh, I might be on semi hiatus because I have exams coming so, forgive me >< see you when I see you~
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