Restrain
Forcefully Love YouToday, Gyuri seemed not like herself since morning. Jiyoung looked at her confusingly when they sat on the backseat of Jiyoung’s car earlier. Gyuri kept silent as she scanned her file for the work later, Gyuri didn’t even move when the car suddenly made a turn and Jiyoung almost fell from her seat. When they both reach the office, Jiyoung walked together with Gyuri but Gyuri just kept on focusing on the file in her hand, Jiyoung didn’t want to say much but she was sad when Gyuri just ignored her all day.
Gyuri didn’t even glance at her when Jiyoung did the presentation on the meeting earlier. She only looked at the file and wrote down some important parts of what Jiyoung said. Jiyoung tried to talk to her but she ignored her by discussed something with Seungyeon while they both went back to their own office.
“This is so frustrating…”
Jiyoung talked to herself as she sat on her chair and ruffled her own hair. She tried to compose herself by saying that she only need to adjust the new atmosphere because she was so used to see Gyuri around her and cling over her most of the time.
Meanwhile, on the other room Gyuri rested her head on the desk as she sighed heavily. She admitted it that this is the hardest thing she had do, Gyuri kept looking at the clock as she read some files but then she was so into them and not even realize that it’s evening already.
Jiyoung knocked on Gyuri’s room but she didn’t even notice it, Jiyoung decided to come in and saw Gyuri still focusing on her work. She coughed a little to make Gyuri at least seeing her in front of her, but sadly Gyuri still kept looking at her file while saying.
“Why?”
“Do you still want to work? It’s late”
“I guess you better go home first, I’ll be home later. Need to finish some of these, first.”
“Can’t you do it later?”
“No”
“Okay, I’ll go home. See you later at home”
Jiyoung tried to talk calmly as she walked away after Gyuri nodded her head as a sign for her to leave her alone. Jiyoung felt a little bit hurt to see Gyuri acted that way but she didn’t say it and not even show how much Gyuri act affected her.
It’s been a week since both Gyuri and Jiyoung did their work separately, they even hardly seen each other at home. Whenever Gyuri came home, she would go to her room and ate her dinner there while continuing her work. Jiyoung could only sigh, watching her lover totally so into work, she felt lonely a bit.
Jiyoung knocked on Gyuri’s door, she stood there for a few minutes but no one answering. She decided to just come inside and found Gyuri still looking at her paper, her serious expression is a rare sight for her, she looked more gorgeous. Jiyoung shook her head, maybe it was just because she rarely watched this side of Gyuri or maybe it because she missed her. She walked closer to the couch where Gyuri seemed unnoticed about her appearance. Jiyoung sat next to Gyuri and waited for her to turn her head to see her.
“Why, Jiyoung ah?”
“So now you call me Jiyoung?”
“I’m busy, can’t you see?”
“You’re at home now, why don’t you rest for a while?”
“I can’t”
“Why?”
“I need to make myself busy in order to stop thinking about you for a while. You said it yourself, don’t you?”
“So, it’s because of me?”
“You know the answer already”
“Please look at me, when you talk”
“No, I’ll be weak later”
Jiyoung cupped Gyuri’s cheek and turned her head to face her. Gyuri looked really tired, her eyes, it looked like she didn’t sleep for several days. Jiyoung felt sad, her lover really suffered a lot, just like her. The difference is, Jiyoung hide it well up till now.
“I’m sorry”
“…”
“Are you still mad at me?”
“…”
Jiyoung kept looking at that face, how much she missed it. It only a week but it seemed she didn’t see her like forever. She might look like she exaggerated it but that’s how she felt. Gyuri breathed slowly, she kept looking down and didn’t dare to dart her eyes to Jiyoung. She needed to, if not she might already hugged her tight and kept her securely in her arms.
“How about we loosen the rules a bit?”
“Huh?”
“You can hug once we’re both at home, how about that?”
“Are you sure?”
Jiyoung nodded slowly, she couldn’t show her real feeling that she really want to hug her just not when her ego take control. It was hard to deal with herself, but she made an exception for Gyuri. She broke her wall since the first time she kissed her, she hated those feelings. She felt insecure almost with everything, which made her like now. Being all cautious and well prepare, Gyuri sudden reaction toward her was caught her off guard, but slowly she like it.
Gyuri moved her hands slowly to Jiyoung’s waist, she looked afraid to touch her. Jiyoung smiled at her and nodded. Gyuri hugged her and rested her head on Jiyoung’s shoulder.
“I missed you”
“I know”
“You know?”
“Isn’t it obvious? Because I miss you too”
“Really? How much?”
“Shush, now. Don’t ask me too much question, I like this silence better”
“Err, okay. But you’re still going to grant my wish right?”
“Sure”
“Okay, I’ll zip my mouth now”
Gyuri smiled and slowly she fell asleep while kept hugging Jiyoung, Jiyoung thought she still awake so she confessed her heart out.
“I love you, sorry if I can’t say it often. I’m not used to it, but I really fall for you when you kissed me back then when I was ten. Just like you, you’re my first love and first crush too. I think I’m grown up to early, right?”
Gyuri snored a little and shifted her body a little, Jiyoung smiled. She brought her to the bed and laid her down, Jiyoung kissed Gyuri’s forehead and covered her with blanket.
“Sleep well, and see you tomorrow”
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