Ji Hyo sits in front of her TV with her hand buried in a bag of shrimp crackers, staring mindlessly at the figures in the outrageous nightly melodrama. Her phone rings suddenly, which jerks her up in surprise and nearly sends her snacks flying out of her hands. 

It's her fiancé's name flashing across the screen and her fingers instinctively tighten as she grabs the phone. She takes a moment to collect herself before answering. 

"Hey, honey", he greets. 

Her face scrunches at the niceties. "Yes, oppa." 

"I have some good news regarding our move." Our, that word haunts her. Enthusiasm drips out of his voice and he waits eagerly for a similar reaction from her. The actress is still calculating her responding words when he continues. 

He tells her he's booked plane tickets for February 2nd from Incheon, with her last week of activity starting January 25th. He's invested in a loft in the Los Angeles area and promises the view is spectacular and she's going to absolutely love it. 

As he proceeds to the details, she rushes to turn off the TV, not wanting to miss a single syllable. Ji Hyo listens intently, pressing her ear flush against her phone. Her brain processes each sentence in ten different ways, trying to determine if there was any possibility that she would be in staying in Korea after all. Even if not forever, just a few more months. 

Suddenly, it was silent. Chang Joo was finished speaking and now waiting for her to reply. She was too busy analyzing each sentence to recall much of the entire story altogether. It was in one ear and out the other. Obviously, he wants to hear a thrilled feedback, but she leans back into the couch in concentration as she tries to assess how she truly feels. 

The fact that he's put down money to prepare for the move only solidifies the reality. If she was running from the truth before, now she's hit a dead end. There's a brick wall in front of her and as he waits for her to speak, she feels the brick walls closing in on her. Every precious second, the walls inch closer. She should do something before she's crushed. Ji Hyo feels the urgency in the pulsing constriction of . 

Maybe if she says something now, objects to his plans now, then the entire illusion of a brick maze will come crashing down. And she can step through the rubble of her mental labyrinth and she's free to go. 

But she takes too long to formulate her words because Chang Joo assumes her minute of silence as permission to continue. After all, silence means "yes". 

And like that, there was a sickening drop in her stomach. It's as if the brick walls stopped closing in her, but only freeze inches from crushing her from all sides. She's still alive, but she's stuck here and unable to move. Will she live out the rest of her days immobile like this? Was it worth it? 

_ _ _ 

Ji Hyo studies her reflection in her phone, adjusting her turtleneck to cover the bruises on her neck. She's grateful that the cold weather easily allows her to disguise Chang Joo's marks. Next she moves up to her cap, re-angling it when there's harsh shove against her back, Her phone becomes airborne, but a strong hand grabs it before it met a painful death. 

"Yah!", she screams while swiveling around with arms raised ready to attack, only to find her muscled friend grinning back at her stupidly. 

"How was your weekend?", he asks naturally. After all, it had only been a few days since their last text exchange. He was hoping to ride off the momentum from that conversation before she shut him out again. 

She huffs and glares at him with her round eyes. He chuckles and thinks it's adorable. 

"You could've broken my phone!", she lunges towards him, attempting to help him experience a similar force of impact. She hits him and he remains unmoved while she stumbles back herself. 

She can't help but giggle at her own absurdity. She's a child at heart. His hearty laughter accompanies hers and Ji Hyo's eyes transform into crescents. It's been a long time since she's felt like this. Her collar is skewed and her bruises are peeking out, but it's long forgotten. 

 “Yah, will you quit fooling around? Everyone’s waiting for you!”, Kwang Soo shouts in the background and they snap back to reality.  

She feels the stares of all eyes of the fifty-plus cast and crew on them as they walk towards the filming site. 

--- 

It is announced that the day’s theme will be a couple race and slips must be drawn for partner selection. Despite all the screams of excitement in anticipation of female guests, Jong Kook hopes for Ji Hyo. 

As commander of everything, he wins rock paper scissors and steps up first to draw from the can. His fingers dance around the folded slips, deep in concentration, trying to feel the printed ink on his skin. He didn’t want to lose out this chance to be with her. Who knows the next time the actress may decide to emerge from her shell. 

The one with the folded corner or the one with a slight tear in the corner or maybe the one creased on the edge or the smooth, flat one or— 

“Did you fall asleep? Hurry up! I can hear them behind the certain!”, Kwang Soo interrupts, also gifting him with a switch kick to the with his long leg, of which Jong Kook quickly snatches and twists, sending the jokester to the ground in an awkward mess of phalanges. 

He returns to the can and picks the first one he sees and begins to unfurl it. He can hear a collective inhale from the males at the site. 

“Song Ji Hyo”, he reads with a pout, exaggerating his disappointment to match with the jeers of his fellow male members. There were teasing pats on his shoulders from Haha and Kwang Soo in fake congratulations. 

He looks back at them and finds Ji Hyo staring back at him with pitiful eyes. 

Sorry, oppa, it’s me. You’re stuck with me when you could’ve been with someone else. 

She knows it’s overdramatic, but she can feel the very, very early stages of tears pricking behind her eyes. Hold it in, hold it in. She chants to herself as she blinks them back. 

She feels like life forgot about her. She doesn’t want to marry the one who proposed to her, but she has no idea who it should be. All she does know is that nobody wants her. Everyone’s life is moving on without her. 

She feels a gentle hand guide her to the sideline. There’s a slight shuffling before a large shadow is cast over her. She knows without looking that it’s Jong Kook. He’s always there for her, even when she doesn’t want him to be. 

There’s a squeeze on her shoulder and she looks up at him. The sun casts a halo around his head and blinds her eyes. Ji Hyo looks down immediately. 

“You alright?” 

She gives a slight nod. 

The teams break up into pairs for the first mission—popping balloons through hugging. Jong Kook swallows hardly. On top of it having to be with her, he doesn’t even know if she wants to touch him. And if she isn’t cooperative, they can’t pop any balloons, so they can’t win. And god, does Jong Kook want to win. 

As the PD rattles off rules, he can feel a knot of butterflies moving up from his stomach up into his throat. His heart is nearly shooting out his rib case. He still remembers the way she looked at him after the holiday party. Like she wanted his company, like she wanted him. The golden sparkles in her eyes and her sweet voice whispering his name. The way her fingers glided into his hand to lock together and the way the world just stopped around them. He wants to touch her again. 

Each team prepares for the whistle. Ji Hyo stands before him. He looks at her. Her eyes are sad. 

At the blow, the partners rush towards each other and the muscled man feels the woman’s arms around him, embracing him tightly. She lets out a small yelp when he squeezes back with such force, she’s lifted off the ground. 

“Oppa, I can’t breathe”, she chokes out. 

He lets her down and his forearm brushes against her collar, revealing a kaleidoscope of smudged blue and purple against her neck. In the midst of battle, there’s no time for straying thoughts and he tucks it into a fold of his memory. 

Her head is against his chest, which muffles her grunts of effort. Her tousled hair is teasing his neck, and her soft perfume floats up to intoxicate him. Jong Kook finds himself unconsciously taking a deep whiff. He wonders if he’s allowed to gain such pleasure from this. He feels like a ert. Well, an almost-ert. He’s not a ert, mind you. 

Pop! The burst balloon sends her colliding against him. The sudden contact sends his heart racing as she beams back at him in celebration and reaches for another balloon.  

Despite the balloon between them, he feels her curves perfectly. He wonders what it’d feel like without the inflatable. She’s wiggling against him, trying to burst it, and the friction does nothing good for his imagination. 

"Harder, oppa. C'mon. Harder!" Ji Hyo commands, fueled by hunger for victory. His heightened senses pick up her raspy, hard breathing. 

Jong Kook is thinking about everything but the mission and swallows hardly. 

His mind is a complete haze but somehow they win, and he rushes off for an emergency bathroom break afterwards. He pretends not to hear Haha's soft snicker as he passes him. 

The team comes streaming into the next mission station, where there's a piggyback race. If this was still the morning, he would've kissed the PD's feet for designing such a day to spend so much time with her, but now he's beginning to curse the director.  It's definitely much more difficult when she's already in his reach but he can't hold onto her.   

He ignores his battling thoughts as he hoists her up onto his back. She's much lighter than he recollected. Her bony knees are bit painful, stabbing into his sides. He hears her light breaths as she rests her head into the crook of his neck.  

"Hwaiting!", she speaks against his skin, like a secret only for him.  

He readies himself for the piercing whistle. Her arms tighten around his neck as she feels his body tense. 

Next thing she knows, Ji Hyo is brought along for the most thrilling ride of her life--half-filled with excitement, half-filled with fear of tumbling off.  

"Faster, oppa! Faster!", she chants repeatedly while slapping his chest in encouragement. 

After racing across acupuncture mats and weaving through cones, Jong Kook dives across the finish line and collapses with the woman still on him. Their bodies are in a tangle on the ground as they try to catch their breaths. 

Ji Hyo looks over at the muscle man, whose eyes are closed in exhaustion with an arm over his forehead. She notices the crows feet around his eyes, an unfriendly reminder that they're aging. Her eyes flicker to the electric tape now revealed from his shirt having ridden up as he laid down haphazardly. The green stripes weave along his sides before disappearing to his back. 

She suddenly feels guilty for her earlier actions for forcing him to exert even more energy when it's obvious he's not completely recovered. 

A "sorry" slips out before she realizes. 

Jong Kook's arm lifts and he slowly turns to look at her. Their eyes meet. 

"What happened?", he asks. Seeing her startled face, he breaks the tension. "What, did you fart?" 

Ji Hyo's nose wrinkles in disgust. "Oppa, you're so gross", giving him a quick shove. 

"Why are you sorry then?" 

"You shouldn't push yourself so hard", she earlier smile fades. 

He follows her eyes to his bandaged body and quickly pulls down the fabric. "I'm alright, Ji Hyo. I promise." 

"Don't force yourself, okay?", she watches his eyes, needing assurance. 

He just looks back at her. 

"We need you here, always. I need you here", the woman cringes inwardly at the last sentence. Too clingy, Ji Hyo. You're leaving for the US soon, remember? She gives him a congratulatory pat on the shoulder to cover her dark thoughts.

"Hey, love birds! The race is over. Get off the ground so we can film", Jae Suk chirps in the background.

A/N: Yes, I am a terrible author for never updating. I can't promise when the next one will be up, but I haven't forgotten about this yet! I've been struggling with writing the last few chapters, and I appreciate the support so far.