A/N: ignore any grammatical & spelling mistake,enjoy

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" I requested my heart ,go find me happiness,

The poor innocent heart brought me sorrow,so let it be sorrow.,

How the poor heart will know,

what is pain,what emptiness is...??

Out of all the happiness,my pain is better than all.,

Instead i enjoyed my sorrowness,than having fun in celebration.,

I requested my heart, go find me happiness.,

the poor innocent heart brought me sorrow ,so let it be sorrow"

 

 

 

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" I can't love again" those words kept on ringing in her ears was deplorable.

Red swollen eyes depicting lots of pain,her shattered dream,her unspoken lost love,her ripped off heart, damp cheeks tear stained,lips trembling,the girl in the reflection is far away from the girl she used to be.Squeezing her eyes ,shinhye burried her face in her palm.

Finally the salty truth have been rubbed on her face

She didn't recognise the broken-devastated girl in the reflection anymore.She bite her lips sanking her teeth until red blood ozzed out,one more look at her reflection and fresh pool of tear escaped through her once lively brighten eyes; as if she haven't cried enough

" It hurts! my body is paining, my head is swirling, my eyes are stinging,most of all my heart is hurting"

Her whole body trembling, her knees became weak and jelly, she couldn't take it anymore and while sobbing still grieving for her broken - dead heart,shinhye sank on the bathroom floor like a discarded piece of cloth.

" It hurts like hell"

 

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>*** flashback**

 

 

“shinhye ah! If something is bothering you talk to me,have I done something unintentionally to hurt you,huh!!then get angry at me, scold me,beat me as much  to your heart content.But don’t avoid me, don’t stop talking to me” his voice trembling as he cupped her hand resting on his cheeks with his

“please don’t leave me “

 

 

" please don't leave me"

Shinhye's eyes watered hearing his words,she squeezed his cheeks shaking her head saying "i'll never leave you"

 

" You're  the only friend, my family after my mother shinhye ah!, Do you know why cried that day because i found the comfort in you i was longing for all these years. My father left us shinhye ah , i was just ten. He abandoned us leaving a ten year child with his shattered, devastated, heart-broken, depressed mother to deal with with the rutheless,cruel world be humiliated,insulted at every step you took."

" The time when i supposed to laugh ,play,live life carefree,make new friends,weave new dreams.i was left with bulk of responsibility and burden on my shoulder. It was crushing me shinhye ah and you know what  the sad part was, i can't cry or mourn , i can't bring myself to be weak infron't of my mother

He paused,lips trembling,Shinhye wiped his tears with her thumbs that were still resting on his cheeks.

 

"our life became miserable here in seoul, we were kicked out of our own house for not pying the rent,then we moved to Busan to our aunt's house,but it seems like it wasn't the end of our misery.My aunt started treating my mother like a maid,she had to do all the household chores,we were given the remaining food and used cloth.And i can't do anything shinhye ah. It felt like dying.

He bite his lips,a lump formed in his throat,eyes squeezing tight

 

" Yonghwa ah! you don't have to if.....

" no! i want to shinhye ah!.." he took a handful of air in and blinked his eyes several time

" when i was fifteen i started working as a waiter in a restaurant,i was adamant to bring my mother out of that hell from my aunt's house.There i met Jonghyun, we became best buddies,my life was open book to him.Everything was going fine"

 

 

Yonghwa gently took her hand resting on his cheek and threaded his finger with her looking at the sky

 

"Until one day he introduced me to his friend Seohyun.We became close friends and then i found out she was also from seoul,she was my bench girl,my childhood friend ,shinhye ah. I met her when i was ten, at same bench were we met first time ,before leaving seoul. she was the reason why i started playing guitar. I was so happy. My feeling for her grew deeper and deeper and finally after two year i confessed her and we became couple."

 

 

Shinhye stiffled ,face blank, a pinch is felt in her heart

 

"It was the best feeling Shinhye ah!,i was on cloud nine,her smile made me forget all the pain,suffering.Finally i found a ray of hope in the darkness"

He smiled bitterly

"But soon the time came to wake up from my dream world,she cheated me with my own friend"

" My world collapsed once again,once again the person i loved the most betrayed me, abandoned me.I wanted to destroy everything, it was so painful but still i couldn't cry, instead i pushed my grief deep in the depth of my heart and locked it up.The burning sensation was still there in my eyes but the tears can't find their way"

 

"I gave her my heart, soul to her and she left me with nothing.She killed me that day Shinhye ah!."

Shinhye found herself helpless,unable to utter anything, she brought her face nearer and rest her forehead on his feeling his pain

 

" She broke my heart beyond repairing,but the sad part is she's still here....pointing at his heart

"as a pain ,a memory,a past....and i know "   " i can't love again"

Those word felt like a tight slap, a er punch on Shinhye's face,her heart sank to the deepest depth.She sat there motionless letting the word registered in her brain.As if in cue black cloud hovered over there head and started downpouring.

 

" Then we moved back to seoul after my final exam.I got lost in my dark world once again ;only me and my loneliness.I built a shell around me totally disconnecting from the world ,i taught myself no one exist around myself , i'm not letting anyone in my world"

Fresh tear mercilessly streamed down his cheeks

"But then you came..he trailed off "you did nothing but sat beside me listening to my music, my pain without asking anything,without a word.You don't know Shinhye ah in a way you were comforting me .This is what i wanted somebody to listen to my heart i was longing for.You brought me out of my shell  letting me break into your arms,you took me under your wings and it felt so safe"

 

" i don't wan't to face it again Shinhye ah, it's scary, i don't wan't to step in that lonely world again.I need you as my " friend" to be always be my side,my only family , my treasure"

 

They were still in kneeling position looking intensely at each other, she winched at the word" friend" but she pushed that thought away and wrapped her hands around his waist letting him cry on her shoulder like she did before as pearls of water kept hitting them.

 

Shinhye also cried her heart out but she didn't know why...

Is it because Yonghwa's heart can't be mend again or her heart got broken for the first time

 

" You're my first love but i can't confess you"

 

 

 

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COMMENT & SUBSCRIBE & VOTE

 ah! really writting this chapter drained my all energy

 

i'm not familiar with any other k actress so i has to use her as yonghwa's ex, i hope u r fine with that or shall i change her name ,then suggest me other name i'll be waiting
 

what will happen next..hmmmm ?? even i don't know

 

thankzzzz a lot friends 4 reading ,subscribing,commenting , u guyzzzz r the best

 

keep supporting me

 

 

" MAKE SOME NOISE"

 

 

~~**keep spreading dooley love**~~