Hope.

A wish or desire accompanied by confident expectation of its fulfillment.

Hope lives in our soul and is eternal.

No matter how harsh life can get, there would always be a grain of hope within us. We may not know or feel it but for sure it’s in there somewhere.

Hope brings about trails and notion to an anticipated end.

A drive within us is present whenever we want to accomplish something we find incredible. It’s like a fuel for your soul that moves you forward to further lengths in order to achieve that point of triumph and contentment.

Hope is what keeps every human creature alive and going – besides love.

It is the very essence of the bond that connects two distant and curtailed spirits together. These two life-forces opt for one main reason. They may disagree at first but in the course of their lives they will realize how much they long for a companion in life. Someone who will complete, complement and bring out the best in them.

Chances of meeting the “one” for us are quite slim. We model our types according to our ideals and what we think would balance our personality. Yet there are others who leave it all to Fate to decide on who they will end up with. You should stay awake and alert but be cautious. We tend to be blinded by their certain characteristics. Sometimes the attitude which we know would lead us to trouble is right in front of us. Instead, we ignore it and brush away the idea of leaving that soul away.

Thus, creating a mistake. Which leads to another and another and another.

A domino of mistakes.

Just as I experienced.

Beginning in my youth.

It was my mistake to fall ardently in with this individual, thinking she loved me back. Passion and foolishness created me to be sightless to this fact.

But the result was a never a mistake but a precious endowment that later ended up to be a great loss.
It was my mistake not to try my hardest to make things work out between us for the sake this innocent life.

But it was not my mistake that she did not even attempt to salvage what we had. She loved me for what I had, not for who I am.

It was my mistake to quit and give up on the both of us, leaving the one thing that held the relationship together. I feel remorseful for the guiltless soul that I’ve left behind.

But never was it a mistake to meet the new person who showed me what life really is about. She taught me three simple essentials in life;

Love. The most important ingredient of all. You are not a soul if you don’t love.

Courage. It’s what challenges us to survive and fight for what we love. Without this, we wouldn’t learn to…

Hope. The force that keeps us going amongst the adversity.

She possessed all three...

And these three I personally learnt from her...

She’s a woman.

A teacher.

A student.

A unique individual.

My best friend.

My love.

My wife. Hope she will be.

She’d done a lot of things for me and I would want to do the same for her.

I lost her once; I’m not losing her again.

She’s suffered too much because of what I’ve done.

I can only imagine the distress she had burdened for twenty years because of my slip-ups.

It was a mistake to let her go away and not try to bring her back to me.

But it was ...

It was ...

It was my mistake that she suffered the worst of all grieves because of me.

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I don’t want to look back anymore on those past memories...

It’s too anguishing and acrimonious to muse over these past events in both our lives.
I came to apologize to her.

My friend.

My love.

My Esmé.

I look back to the window and the rain stopped. The coldness diminished a bit. I immediately let go of my hand from the pane.

As I continue to write may nothing go wrong. If such will happen, may our love story be passed on. How simple yet complicated our love story is.

Sincerely yours,

Blake Yixing.

02/16/33.