The whole ride home you sat at the back of the car clenching onto Donghae’s arm while Hyukjae watched you from the rearview mirror. You flinched every time a speeding car passed by and just squeezed Donghae’s arm tighter. He didn’t mind, instead he just had silent conversations with Hyukjae through the reflection of the mirror. At one point you drove through a tunnel which made everything darker. You started shaking as you were mumbling to yourself. Soon soft whimpers could be heard from you and tears started to fall down you face. Donghae tried his best to calm you down by holding your shaking body and placing your head on his chest. Hyukjae got scared and turned around to see how you were, but he realized that wasn’t the best idea when he almost swerved into the next lane and an incoming car honked loud. Hearing the noise made you scream and panic and that caused Donghae to cry since he didn’t know what more he could do to calm you down.

“Eunhyuk! Watch the road! Mina’s  already scared to death of driving! You want her to have a heart attack?”

“Mianhae…I was worried.”

“You don’t have to worry about anything. I’ve got her and I’m not going to let anything happen. Just focus on getting us home.”

Hyukjae listened to his friend and kept his eyes on the road. He kept stealing small glances from the mirror just to check on you and saw that you were slowly calming down as your eyes began to shut. Hyukjae saw how his friend was holding you and couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. He knew Donghae was his best friend and that he shouldn’t feel like that but seeing you in that condition made him want to be the one who was sitting at the back comforting you. He felt like it was his job and he felt bad that Donghae was the one protecting you at the moment. There were many times through the drive where Hyukjae wanted to ask Donghae if they could switch seats, but then he was always reminded of Donghae’s driving skills and realized that it was best if he continued to drive.

Once home, Hyukjae parked the car in the drive way and ran to the back so that he could help Donghae carry your sleeping body into the house while Donghae got out all of the bags containing your belongings and your medication. Hyukjae gently set you down on your bed and watched your sleeping body as he tucked some of your hair behind your ear. He only stopped looking at you when he felt a hand in his shoulder. He turned around to see a smiling Donghae.

“She looks so peaceful Hae. Almost as if nothing happened.” Hyukjae just continued to your hair as he stared at your face.

“Let’s hope she’s like that when she wakes up…What did that doctor tell you anyway?”

“He just told me to keep an eye on her. He said that she would be stressed for the next couple of days and that if anything happens, I should take her back.”

“Good advice. I think she’s gonna need help from all of us.”

“So you’ll help me take care of Mina?”

“Of course. She’s like a sister to me.”

Hyukjae just smiled. “Thanks Hae, you’re a really good friend…So what now?”

“Well I’m gonna go back home and tell the others that she’s fine. They’ve been worried sick about the both of you and they’ve been calling me all day.”

“Oh right. Do you need a ride home?”

“No need. What if Mina wakes up in that time? She’s gonna need you by her side the second her eyes open.”

“Are you sure?”

“Hyukkie, you spend too much time worrying about everyone. I can make it back on my own. You have bigger things to deal with.” Donghae smiled and pat his friends back before he made his way out. After that Hyukjae pulled up a chair by your side and just read a book while he waited for you to wake up. About an hour had passed and Hyukjae was feeling rather hungry so he went down stairs to make enough ramen for the both of you. In that time you had finally woken up. You saw that you were finally in the comfort of your own bed and you noticed that you were alone. You cautiously got up and walked around the house in search of anyone. You made it to the kitchen and saw Hyukjae pouring the noodles into two separate bowls.

“Hyukjae?”

He turned around and softly smiled at you. “Jagi! You’re awake.”

“What day is it?”

“It’s only the afternoon. Donghae and I brought you home from the hospital a couple of hours ago.”

You nodded slowly and walked over to him to see what he was cooking. When you were by his side he put an arm around your waist and pulled you into a side hug. “How are you feeling?”

“Okay, I guess…I’ll set the table.”

Hyukjae held you in place. “You don’t have to do that. I can set the table.”

“Hyukjae, Dr. Choi said that the fastest way for me to fully recover was to slowly get back into my normal routine. I don’t need to be taken care of like a little kid.” You pulled his arm off of your waist and walked towards the cabinet where you had the glasses. You pulled out two and set them on the counter. Hyukjae just watched you as you went to the fridge and searched for the water filter. You seemed to be doing fine so he just turned back around to pour the rest of the ramen into the bowls.

You gently poured the water into the glasses and you just watched them fill up. From the glass, the water looked so peaceful. You saw the way each drop crashed into each other and the little bubbles of air that formed just at the surface of the water. You started to think about how you were gasping for those little bubbles of air and how you were choking on every drop of water that was entering your lungs. The feeling was still fresh in your body and you started to shake as you felt cold water running down your skin. Your mind finally focused back when you realized that you had poured too much into the glass.

“Damn!” Out of shock you accidentally you dropped both the water filter and the glass. Hyukjae turned around the second he heard the shattering sound against the floor. He ran to your shaking body and held you close, telling you that everything was alright. You kept on mumbling into his chest and he couldn’t understand what you were saying.

“Jagi! What’s wrong?”

You tried to speak through your sobs but just ended up choking on air.“The…the water…choking…oh my god.” Hyukjae just held you closer as you cried.

“Shh…everything’s fine. There’s no water and you’re not choking. You’re fine.”

“Hyukkie…I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“You have to waste all this time looking after me. I’m so sorry. I’m trying to be normal again…I really am…I just…”

“Hey…no one said that you weren’t normal. You’re just a little stressed over what happened. And I’m going to help you get over that…I promise.”

And he kept his promise. Hyukjae was able to negotiate with his managers to divide his schedule among the other members. Donghae and Shindong helped the other members with choreography, Heechul filled in for him on Strong Heart, and Sungmin took his spot on any variety show that he was supposed to guest star on. So Hyukjae was able to have the entire 2 weeks with you without having any disturbances. The managers let the fans know that he was taking care of you and you even received some “get well soon” cards from very supportive ELF. You realized how lucky you were to have Hyukjae and that made you feel like you couldn’t burden him for too long. So you forced yourself to get passed all of the stress and visions that you were having. After the 2 weeks were over you insisted to Hyukjae that you were completely fine and you put up a pretty convincing act. Even though you were having nightmares, you simply held in your screams and managed to keep your shaking to a minimum. He didn’t really believe you but you always told him that it was just him worrying too much. You even begged him to let you go back to work. And when he didn’t agree you called his mother and convinced her that you could go back to the bakery. With his mother at his back, he reluctantly let you go back while he resumed his normal schedule. You knew that he told his mother to watch you very carefully so you tried to pull yourself together whenever she walked by, and as soon as she was out of sight you would run to that back as you clutched your chest and gasped for air. You couldn’t let anyone know that you were still very damaged from the accident so you let yourself cry for about  5 minutes before you had to pull yourself together. But that became harder every time you would see a young child walk through the door. You would shake as you would see their smiles and laughter and you tried your hardest not to break down every time one of them looked at you.

One time you couldn’t hold it in any longer and you dropped several plates on the floor the moment you saw a kid crying and running to his mother. Ms. Lee came rushing in at the sound and saw you just standing around the mess with your face pale. She tried to snap you out of your trembling state and cleaned everything up as she sent you to the back. The moment the mess was sorted out she rushed out the back to check on you. She told you that she was going to call Hyukjae to come pick you up but you begged her not to. You tried to explain that the floor was just slippery and you lost your balance but she still didn’t believe you.

“Umma please! I swear that it was just the floor.”

“Sweetie, then why are you crying like this and why was your face so pale?”

“I’m still a little emotional…nothing else. There’s no reason to disturb Hyukjae at a time like this.”

“Mina…Are you sure you’re fine? I mean it was only a couple of weeks ago that you were…”

“I’m still in the process of healing. I’m just trying to forget everything and once I do that then I’ll be fine. Calling Hyukjae and making him worry is not going to help. He’ll just make me feel like I can’t do this by myself.”

Your mother-in-law just walked up to you and gave you a warm hug. “Don’t ever be afraid to ask me or Hyukjae for help. Understand?”

You nodded and waited for her to leave. As soon as you were sure she wouldn’t hear you, you began to cry again. “I do need help…but I don’t want to be a burden.” You continued to cry and somewhere along the way of all your thoughts, you made up your mind that this was just something that you were going to have to deal with. No one could know what you were going through, especially Hyukjae.