Chanyeol woke up and found Baekhyun wasn’t there beside him anymore. Chanyeol frowned. It was out of habit that Baekhyun woke up before him. It was always him to wake Baekhyun up, something wasn’t right here.

And honestly, Chanyeol felt a bad feeling for this.

He quickly pushed the blanket and got up from the bed, rushing outside. But all he could find was nothing. The living room was empty, so were the bathroom and the kitchen.

Where the hell is he?!

Chanyeol started to panic. He couldn’t find Baekhyun anywhere in this apartment room he didn’t even know where the tiny boy was. Baekhyun didn’t say anything to him last night. As long as he could remember, the boy was drifting to sleep after they had made love.

Frustrating, Chanyeol went to his own room, hoping Baekhyun was there. But still, he found nothing. “Where are you, Baek?” he whispered to himself. He felt like crying now. He looked around, it might be Baekhyun left something to him; some hints that would tell him what was going on.

And he was right.

There was a letter on his desk, which he was sure it wasn’t there last night. It must be from Baekhyun.

Chanyeol took the letter, opening it.

Chanyeol, I’m sorry for leaving without telling you anything. I just can’t tell you straight forward, I didn’t even brave to tell you what did happen.

I’m going back to my apartment, Yeol. I met Kyungsoo yesterday, and he told me that he wants to come back to me, he wants to be mine again. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about this.

Thanks for everything, Yeol. I’m so happy I could meet you. Thanks for sharing your apartment with me. Thanks for hugging me when I was scared. Thanks for cheering me up when I was sad.

Chanyeol, thanks for saving me.

I will never forget you.

Sincerely,

Baekhyun

Chanyeol couldn’t believe what he’d just read. Baekhyun left him. Baekhyun was back to his old love. After all this time, after what Chanyeol did to him, after what they did last night, he left.

And a single tear dropped to his cheek.

“Stupid…” Chanyeol whispered. “Stupid Chanyeol, why are you crying? You must be happy, Baekhyun finds his happiness now. Don’t cry, you stupid!”

But the tears wouldn’t stop flowing.

Chanyeol fell to the floor, sitting while crying his heart out, enfolded the letter in his chest.

He was deeply in love with Baekhyun. He was crazy in love with the boy who now was going back to Kyungsoo.

Just if only he could tell Baekhyun how he loved him. Just if only he could tell Baekhyun that he didn’t want him to leave him.

Just if only he could.

Be happy, Baekkie. Be happy. I love you, so you must be happy with anybody you want to be with, even though it’s not me.

***

“Eh? He left? B-but… how could he? I mean, after all the things you two did together…” Luhan and Sehun couldn’t believe it when Chanyeol told them that Baekhyun was leaving already.

“I don’t know… but I’m happy if he’s happy. I think being with Kyungsoo is Baekhyun’s most happiness, right?” Chanyeol said with a smile on his face.

But both of Luhan and Sehun knew it was just a force smile. Chanyeol was broken. They could look it clearly how Chanyeol really care about Baekhyun, they knew he loved Baekhyun with his whole heart, and it might be really hard that Baekhyun left him.

Sehun took the letter that Baekhyun left for Chanyeol, reading it fast before putting it again on Chanyeol’s table on his living room. He sighed. If he were Chanyeol, it might have hurt him a lot.

“Look, Channie…” Luhan stretched his hand, pulling Chanyeol’s hand and holding it tightly. “Tell me, are you really okay with all of this?”

“Yeah, nothing’s wrong with this, right? Baekhyun’s happy, me too.” Chanyeol chuckled, which was made Luhan sighed in frustration.

“Everything is wrong with this, Chanyeol! Look at you! You look pathetic! You love him, don’t you? You don’t want him to leave, right? You want him to be yours, to be by your side, you need him! I can see your eyes are swollen right now, you’d already cry for a whole day, right?” Luhan paused to pull Chanyeol into his warm embrace. “For God’s sake, Chanyeol, don’t push yourself like this. I know you’re sad, I know you’re broken. You might lie to us, but you can’t lie to yourself.”

Chanyeol couldn’t say anything. But somehow, tears started flowing down his cheeks. Luhan was right, he was definitely right.

“I love him…” he whispered. “I want him back…”

“Tell him, Chanyeol. I think he loves you too, he’s just… confused. You know he used to love Kyungsoo so much, and you never tell him that you love him…”

But all Chanyeol could do was shake his head weakly. “No…” he said, pulling off from Luhan’s embrace and forcing a little smile. “I don’t want to make him more confused. He must be happy with Kyungsoo…”

“But—”

Luhan wanted to argue, but Sehun touched his shoulder, shaking his head. He then looked at Chanyeol and said, “It’s okay if that’s what you want.”

“But, Sehun—”

“You can’t force him to do what you want him to do, Honey,”

“But it’s for Chanyeol’s sake! No, it’s for Baekhyun’s sake too! They love each other!”

Sehun patted his boyfriend’s head, smiling. “No, Luhan. Just let Chanyeol do what he wants to do.” he said before turning his head to Chanyeol. “We’ll help you to forget him.”

“I don’t know if I can forget him, though…” Chanyeol mumbled.

“You can, I know it. You’re the most cheerful person I’ve ever known, so I’m sure you can forget him and back to your old self. Right, Lulu?”

Luhan sighed. “Yeah…” he said half-heartedly. “I still want you to go chase Baekhyun and drag him back to your side, though, but I won’t force you. If you want to forget him, okay, I’ll help you.”

Chanyeol smiled, wiping his tears and looking at his best friends. “Thanks, guys. I’m lucky to have both of you here,” he said.

Luhan pouted, hugging Chanyeol tightly. “You will always have us by your side. We won’t leave you, ever.”

Chanyeol closed his eyes, burying his face on Luhan’s shoulder.

***

It’s been two weeks since Baekhyun left and everything went bad for Chanyeol. He couldn’t smile like he used to, all of his smile know was just a force smile. Even though Luhan and Sehun always tried to cheer him up, it didn’t bring any difference.

No matter how many Chanyeol said he was okay, in fact he never was. He was still broken he couldn’t even fix it anymore. He needed Baekhyun, he missed him so much he could die. He wanted to run away from his feeling for Baekhyun. It hurt him badly.

And this evening, the situation wasn’t changing for Chanyeol. He walked inside his apartment after work, sighing that he realized that this place was full of memories of Baekhyun. A month wasn’t a long time, but it was enough to make Chanyeol suffered from his precious memory with Baekhyun.

Is this what you felt when you broke up with Kyungsoo, Baek? God, I don’t know it really hurts even just for walking inside my own apartment, and it’s all because of memories of you.

Chanyeol locked the door and went to the living room, sitting on the couch. If Baekhyun was still here, they must cuddle now while watching Baekhyun’s favorite cartoon.

Chanyeol smiled as he remembered how Baekhyun loved that favorite cartoon he didn’t even understand the story.

Are you watching that silly cartoon now, Baek? I bet you are.

Suddenly, the phone on his pocket pants vibrated. He quickly put it out and saw who was calling him.

“Mom?” he said as he frowned. He pressed the answer button. “Yes, Mom? Yeah, I’m fine, I’m sorry for not calling you, I have… such a hard days. Yeah, I’m okay… what…?”

Chanyeol gulped.

“Okay. Yeah, I got it, Mom. I’ll be back by tomorrow morning, okay? Yeah. Yeah, love you too, Mom,”

Chanyeol sighed when the call was ended. He then typed a short message for Luhan.

My father is sick and I have to go back to my hometown to take over the company. I’ll be back by train tomorrow morning. I hope I can meet you two before I go.

Message sent.

***

Luhan looked like he was going to cry soon when he and Sehun came to say goodbye to Chanyeol. “I’ll miss you so much,” he said, looking down as he bit his lower lip, tears slowly dripped from his cute eyes.

“I miss you too, both of you,” Chanyeol said, patting Luhan’s head. “Take a good care of Luhan, Sehun. And take care of you too,”

“Of course. You too, Chanyeol. Don’t forget to call us once you arrive, okay?”

“Yeah.” Chanyeol smiled, extending his long arms to embrace his best friends. “Thanks for everything, you guys.”

“We’ll meet again, right? You’ll come here to visit us sometime, right?” Luhan asked between his sob.

“Of course! There’s no way I won’t come here!” Chanyeol replied, releasing his arms from Luhan and Sehun. He pinched the crying boy’s cheek gently, giving him a soft smile. “Don’t cry, I’ll visit you when I have a spare time,”

“Promise me?”

“Promise.”

Sehun looked at the taxi that Chanyeol ordered. “I think you should go now, Chanyeol. The taxi is waiting for you already, and you won’t be late to take your train, right?”

Chanyeol looked at the watch on his wrist. “Ah, you’re right. It’s time to go, I think.” he said. “So, goodbye?”

Luhan and Sehun gave Chanyeol the last hug before letting him went inside the taxi. Chanyeol waved his hand at them when the taxi started moving.

Chanyeol sighed. It will be hard to leave this town when he already used to live here, but he was sure it will be harder to live in the place that full with the precious memory of his beloved one.

Hesitantly, Chanyeol took out his phone, typing some short message.

I’m gonna leave this town in no time. My father is sick he can’t handle the company anymore. The one who has to take over the company is me, so yeah. I wish I can meet you again sometime.

He just wanted to press the send button, but then he changed his mind.

No, Baekhyun doesn’t have to know.

***

“Yes, Mom, I’m in station now. The train will depart for five minutes…” Chanyeol rushed inside the crowded station, not wanting to miss the train. He almost ran when he heard an announcement that told all of the passengers had to get on the train now, and Chanyeol was sure it was his train. “Yes, I’m going to—CRAP!”

Thanks to his clumsiness, Chanyeol was slipped by his own leg and dropped his phone. And thanks again to someone who stepped his foot on his phone and broke it.

Again, the announcement was heard. Chanyeol had to get on the train, there was no time to take his phone back.

Good, Chanyeol. Prepare yourself to get scold by your mom for dropping your phone and making her worry like hell.

Chanyeol sighed. He didn’t have any chance but got on the train before he missed it. So he quickly got on the train and sat on his seat. He threw his gaze outside as the train started moving.

Goodbye.