“Sica, you forgot this step. This, like this.” Hyoyeon said while demonstrating the dance.

                “Really? Sorry.. I think I kept missing that one. Can I see that one more time, please..” I beg her to repeat the moves.

                Tomorrow  we’re going to perform on stage. I’m not feeling really nervous, though. I guess it’s just normal since I AM an idol. But really, some dance moves seem not familiar in my mind. I’m learning dance moves so fast according to the members. And that is one thing I’m proud about. The fact that I’m a less burden to the members makes me glad.

                I still can’t even remember a single thing. I can’t recognize my parents, my friends, and memories of my childhood. Sometimes I feel some familiarities in some places. Like on stage and in the office or broadcasting places. It’s not like I remember them, those are just some close feelings I get. Weirdly, I can’t seem to find this kind of familiarity in my house, or in the dorm. I can’t even feel secure in my own room. I wonder what really happened to me.

                Every two days, I must see the doctor so they can see my progress on remembering anything I should remember. But I can’t even imagine how is it to remember them.

                “All right! We’ve finished our practice. Good job girls!” Taeyeon said it out loud. Like really, LOUD. But she’s cute, though.

                “Aah, so tiring..” Yuri sighed.

                “Is the practice always like this?” I asked Sunny, in the corner of the practice room.

                “Hmm? Like what?”

                “I mean, aren’t we wasting too much time playing around in the middle of practice? Is that because you all want to make me comfortable?”

                She laugh softly. “No, it’s not like that. We’re always like this. Well, we end up finish late though. But it’s fun, isn’t it?”

                “Hmm.. But I think it’s better if we practice first, then playing around. So it wouldn’t be so tiring..”

                “Woah! Taeyeon! You should hear what this kid saying!” She suddenly talk loudly to Taeyeon who’s been in the center of the room. “She’s sounded like our Hyunnie now..” She said while laughing.

                “What is it, Unnie?” Seohyun, whose name being mentioned asked in curiousity.

                “Ya! Why should you saying it out loud!” I try to cover jokingly.

                I think after one month seeing each other, practice together, and doing so many things with them makes me somewhat close to them. Especially to Sunny. I just find it comfortable to be with her.

                But really, the members say that I changed. Well, my attitudes don’t seem to be same as before. I became more serious and mature.

                And that makes me wonder..

Having different attitudes from before, is it a good or..

..a bad thing..?

--

                “Sica! What are you doing?!” Taeyeon screams to me. Loudly, again..

                I came to dorm early this morning. I seem to have nothing to do. And I kind of uncomfortable at home. So here I am, making my breakfast. “What? I just made something to eat. You want some?”

                “Are you sure? You’re bad at it. Can’t you at least remember that?” she sighed.

                “Really? I feel confident, though?” I said while smiling at her.

                When it’s done, the members are already gather at the table, watching me prepare the food. Except for Sooyoung and Seohyun, who’re not stay in the dorm anymore, same as me.

                They all stare at me as if I am their research subject. Then, their attention goes to the foods I placed on the table.

                “It looks good, though…” Yoona said unsure.

                “Just try it. Really, I’m confident with this.” I said while eating mine.

                One by one, they tasted it. I can see their surprised face. Did I do something wrong?

                “Woah! You seem to surprised us these days! How could you make a fine kimchi fried rice. I can’t even bear to eat it before.” Taeyeon’s got really amazed.

                “Yeah, really. It’s not like you at all,” said Fany.

They say I can’t cook. But now, I can make a fine kimchi fried rice. Judging from their expressions, I must be really bad at it before. Or else, how can they be surprised like that?

Well, losing your memory definitely isn’t a good thing..

But it seems not a bad thing for me, huh?

--