I shook in my seat as the stylist adjusted my mic that had nearly clung to my cheek. I fidgeted with my hands and I must have come off super panicky because she squeezed my shoulders and wished me luck. It's normal to have a little anxiety attack every now and then before performances, for me at least. But this wasn't anything close to it. I was freaking out. If I had the chance I'd flee the building, but then I'd be letting everyone down. And I'd be giving up. I'm tired of giving up.

After the stylist was finished with me, I hopped out of my chair and left the room. I needed to find a restroom and calm my nerves. I passed by countless idols, not that I noticed any of them. That's when I bumped into a young woman who rushed past me nearly knocking me to the floor. I turned to see her jogging down the hall. I was only able to see the back of her head, her brown waves jumping up and down her back. She didn't look familiar. How dare she just run past me like that? I had no time to cause ruckus. I continued my path until I found the restroom.

To calm my nerves I usually rehearse my moves just to be sure I've got them down. I stood in front of the mirror and blew in and out accordingly. 

"You'll do fine." I spoke to my reflection. I managed a smile but who was I fooling? What if I forgot the moves? I can't depend on my fantasies again. I calmed my heart rate by pacing back and forth and then began practicing. I watched and I was satisfied with how cool I looked; of course not as cool as Ga In but I wasn't supposed to. She was the spotlight. I was her back-up. 

I kept doing so until I heard the intercom call for B.A.P. I squealed and fixed my curls, blowing my bangs out of my face. Then I scurried out of the bathroom. I couldn't miss B.A.P. I couldn't miss Zelo. Not for the world.

I joined Yoosung and Nami backstage before I knew it and watched as Yongguk appeared. He recognized us immediately and smiled big. His smile was so cute I had to do everything I could not to spazz. Yoosung and Nami waved coolly. I watched as one by one the members passed me, greeting me and wishing me luck. The last to walk past was Zelo who looked hyped to go out and perform for his fans. I seemed to lose my voice and I watched him. Next thing I knew I was pressed onto him. I'd been pushed by Yoosung perhaps. My face flushed red and I recoiled as quickly as I allowed myself to.

"Ah, mianhae!" I bowed several times, but he only chuckled. I stopped and raised my eyes to him. He was gleaming at me.

"Noona, eh? Ga in's back-up dancer? No problem, good luck tonight! Cheer me on and I'll cheer you on as well?" he smiled big, his white teeth shining brightly at me. I nodded slowly, unable to respond. I was utterly disappointed in myself but give me a break. These things don't come easy.

"So yeppeo." he poked my cheeks before seeing himself off, still smiling. When he went out on stage he'd turned from a cute Maknae to a bad boy. Like always. I held my cheeks and stood frozen, my eyes wide. Yeppeo?

"Ah, see? He called you pretty!" Nami cheered for me. Yoosung grinned and boasted about how I should thank her later. 

"You owe me." she simply stated after much thought. I turned to her and as upset as I was with her before, I couldn't love her enough for what just occured.

I watched as Zelo mastered his dance moves like he'd practiced them in his sleep. Here I go living in my fantasies again. I kept my eyes on him the whole performance through, screaming along with the sea of fans out below the stage. Yoosung eventually had to plop her hand over my mouth and hush me. 

B.A.P. ended their "Hajima" and the fans went wild. The members blew kisses and thanked the crowd for coming out. Then they returned backstage. Yoosung and Nami congratualated them and Zelo passed by me again. I decided to say something myself before I got pushed into him for a 2nd time. 

"Congrats to everyone. And you too Zelo. You guys did great. Like always." I looked down and pressed my fingers to my lips, smiling. Zelo laughed and thanked me enthusiastically.

"I can't wait to see you go up. Even if you're just a back-up dancer. I'll be cheering for you more than Ga In." He whispered this in my ear so sweetly I thought I might fall over. I watched his lips that were near my cheek. I wanted to so desperately touch those. I nodded and laughed nervously. He sensed the nervousness and backed away quickly.

"Mian." with another smile, he was gone. 

I turned to my friends and fangirled to my heart's content. They nodded and hugged me. They were oh so very proud of me. I might have overdone it but in the end I'm still a young girl. I waited for the hosts to anounce the next performer as I gained my composure back and stood with my friends, peering out onto the stage. 

"And we welcome you NS Yoon G and Jay Park, with "If You Love Me!" the fans went crazy, maybe even crazier than when B.A.P. crossed onto the stage. Who was this Yoon G? I asked my friends and they shrugged as well, curiosity have strucken them as they watched the stage go dark.

Ga In appeared next to us drinking a bottle of water. I'd been wondering where she was this whole time. Nami greeted her but Yoosung was too busy gawking at the stage. 

"Wah, she's y." Yoosung breathed out. I hadn't torn my eyes from Ga In ever since she arrived. Her make-up pasted on her face just perfectly and her hair had fallen without one strand out of place. She her lips and handed the water bottle to an employee that passed her. It was a middle-aged man who's face lit up to see Ga In take notice of his presence. She was merely using him favorly, but nontheless he took the bottle without hesitation and thanked her. I laughed at this, but muffled it with my hands. Ga In's face looked troublesome.

She was as well looking out onto the stage. I turned back to it to see what all the cheering was for. Out on the floor was artist Jay Park with some girl who pressed her body against him, dancing seductively with him accompanying her. She looked familiar.

I gasped when I watched her turn her back towards my view. It was that girl who bumped into me earlier. I'm sure it was an accident. Was this Yoon G? When she twirled her petite frame our way and met eyes with not me, but the person next to me, I turned to see Ga In looking down at the floor. Now that I mention it, Ga In had been looking at Yoon G this whole time. Did they know each other? 

Yoon G's performance ended and she bowed to her fans. Jay Park hugged her and parted ways, leaving the other end of the stage. Yoon G came straddling our way, dripping with sweat. Ga In cleared and watched as she approached us. She smiled and grabbed the towel someone offered her. It was the same man who took Ga In's water bottle with gratitude. His smile was equivalent to if he'd won the lottery. He must have loved his job.

"Ga In-unnie." She whined cutely, grabbing onto her arm. Ga In's eyes widened and she stepped back startled. Yoon G pushed me out of the way by trying to squeeze next to her side. Nami gasped at the sight and Yoosung mouthed 'what the '. I moved out of the way and glared at this Yoon G. I already didn't like her. Even if earlier was an accident, this wasn't. 

"Ah, Yoon G." Ga-In managed a cute eye smile and nodded, untangling her arm. She smoothed out her outfit and contently listened to the witch squeal and boast about how prettier Ga In had become. 

"I didn't think it would be possible for you to become even  more beautiful than you already were. But you surprise me all the time, do you not?" I could only see the back of her head but I assumed the way she said this had some hidden meaning. I watched Ga In blush and- wait. She was blushing?  I did not like this. 

The hosts out on stage called for Ga In and it was our cue to leave. My body heat radiated and I was no longer nervous. I was annoyed. Time to show this little Yoon G witch how to properly seduce the audience. Ga In watched me. I looked away and smiled at my friends, wishing them good luck. That twinkle I saw in Ga In's eyes last night, it was no longer there. I might have been delusional the whole time.

Yoon G wished Ga In luck and swooped her arms around her, caressing her. She was shorter than Ga In, so she buried her head in her neck. I was getting impatient with this. Ga In awkwardly waved her off after Yoon G pulled herself away. Then we all headed onto the stage.