Chapter II: Some Nights

Some nights, Hyukjae dreamed of a y woman wearing only lingerie, a very alluring and tempting sight, wants to have some fun. But, most nights, he dreamed about him and Donghae. What if they were not friends at all and Donghae didn’t ask him that stupid question?

‘I want you to be my best friend. Do you want to be mine too?’

It happened on their first foundation day after a year of knowing each other. Donghae was catching up his breath while holding both Hyukjae’s shoulders on each sides and then he thought Donghae was about to confess his love for him but it didn’t happened. It never came.

So, he said ‘yes’. As a matter of fact, his brain agreed to it but not totally his heart.

Yes, he likes Donghae more than what they’re both offering all these years: the “so called” stupid friendship they’re having. But, it’s the closest thing that would connect both of them to each other that time. The very closest thing that was possible at that moment.

But of course, his best friend doesn’t know that, only his other best friend Sungmin who’s his childhood best friend only knows his secret crush on Donghae way, way before freshmen years…

“Minnie, you’ve seen that guy over there, the brunette one beside the genius guy with his game console attach on his hands?”

Hyukjae poked his best friend who’s beside him while listening to the speaker on the stage.

Sungmin’s head turned to gaze at the one his best friend is pointing to and there he found two cool and handsome men with just about a few feet away from where they were standing.

“So?” he replied.

“Isn’t he handsome and cool?” Hyukjae stated, giggling.

“I thought you’re not gay, Hyuk. He’s handsome and cool but you know he’s not my type.” Sungmin commented and turn his head on the front after.

“Because he’s my type,” Hyukjae replied and giggled once again after taking one last look at the man who took his heart away and turn to listen to the blah-blah-blah’s of the speaker again.

Hyukjae had a hard time all these years. Of course, he knew Donghae’s moves for him. But, he’s too scared that when the time comes he opens his chest for Donghae to see, their friendship would crush into pieces. Even though Sungmin already said that Donghae might love him back, he wasn’t too sure to sacrifice the three years of hard work of learning about a certain fish named Lee Donghae.

He even thought Donghae will be better off with someone else. But, just thinking about a girl clinging on his arm made his blood boil down in jealousy. Hyukjae doesn’t have the right but, deep inside, those glares he gave to those girls that surrounds him all the time he wasn’t with him is genuine. He’s owning Donghae and silently muttering ‘He’s mine’ to everyone who dares to come close to him.

Hyukjae also knew he was stupid. Kyuhyun already slapped that to him, right? But, for some reasons, he just doesn’t have the heart to confess. He was too shy to even ask.

Some nights, he would tell himself that the next day he would return Donghae’s cheesy moves to him like, calling him ‘baby’ as well. (I know that sounds cheesy, right? Cheese balls overload.) And some nights, he would tell himself to let it go and protect their friendship.

Okay. He knows he’s super stupid already. But, it’s just the way his brain works. It is how he’s been made of, to make both of their hearts suffer. To worsen the case and wound it deep even more.

Three years have passed by so quickly, Hyukjae never thought the time would passes by so fast, he needs to act, well, fast. He has to do it right before it’s too late. He has to act now or else, Donghae will be snatch away with some that will waste Donghae’s time.

Tonight, he will make a promise to himself. Tomorrow, everything’s going to change. He would be finally opening up and just let his feelings flow so that someday, Donghae will finally see through him.

Tonight, he will not be a ‘pabo’ anymore just like Kyuhyun always say.

Tonight, he will dream about him and Donghae…holding hands while walking to school.

A smile formed on his lips as he bids himself a good night sleep.

~<3~

A/N: i'll edit this tomorrow because it's already late. It's morning here already. i need to sleep. Some bad news though. I might drop this story or i'll finished this story soon, not making it longer. whatever. i'm groggy and i'm depressed for some reason. gome.