651 words       |       Angst, Drama       |    Lu Han/Kai

"So...you love me." 

He nods, gripping on the edge of the table tightly. The table is between me and him, and it’s so small but the distance is vast between us.

"I do." he replies.

"Bu not enough to stay." You continue, looking past him, staring at the blank expanse of the wall.

"No." he agrees, biting his lip. You sigh.

You're tired.

The two of you were too different yet too alike; with each wound you inflict on each other, you continue to hurt; you dig deeper and deeper until every wound would scar and until even a faint brush would remind you of the memory of hurt and sorrow and of the knowledge that sometimes things are not meant to be.

And now you're full of scars and wounds that had never healed; they continue to scrape with every skirmish, with every battle you force unto yourselves; and even now you're still bleeding, your body trying to force him out of your system.


It's ironic how you're standing here once again, in this place which had witnessed the start of your relationship; and now, this place will see the ruins of your once thought out fantasy.

You used to dream you would spend eternity with him.

Not anymore.

"Alright," you say easily, marveling at the way the word rolls off your tongue; it seems so easy, like you're simply brushing the sand off your skin; like you're shedding clothing that had once fit you perfectly like a glove.

He nods again, turning on his heel and going to the bedroom, hauling his things into suitcases you thought would never see the light of day.

You're tempted to laugh, but what comes out is a bitter cry.








"You're leaving." you say, sitting on the couch, as you hear the clinks of the wheels of his suitcases. You don't look, because you want to avoid tempting yourself from rushing into his arms, asking for his forgiveness, begging him to stay.

You're tired, but not ready to say goodbye.

"I am." his voice is soft, morose, like in any second he's going to cry. You will yourself to be strong. This wasn't helping you anymore; you were just killing each other piece by piece in every argument, in every fight.

"I---" you say with difficulty, clearing your throat. "I---Take care, Jongin."

"Okay." he says, and even without looking you know he has already started to cry.

"Lu Han." he says it so brokenly, your name spilling from his lips like a dying wish.

Despite the promise you made to yourself, the first tears had started to fall.

You turn in your seat to see him standing behind you, looking small and vulnerable as he looked down on his feet, fists tightly curled on his sides.

You stand up and crush him to your body, allowing yourself one last grievance---he falls into your embrace automatically, and it makes you cry even harder, knowing you used to fit like a puzzle.

"Jongin." you sob, curling your arms around him even tighter. You crush your lips to his--one last time-- and it reminds you of a memory.

The memory of you once laughing as you exchange kisses; the memory of you exchanging promises of forever and eternity; the memory of you carving your names in the sand.

The waves have washed it all away.

You extract yourself and smile tearfully at him; he wipes away the tears from your skin; and you're reminded of how much you had loved him, and love him still.

"Goodbye." he whispers, but it seems so loud to your ears.

"Take care." you repeat yourself.

He goes to the door and takes one last lingering look of you.

"Lu Han." he says. 

"I'm sorry."

You smile sadly, raising your hand in a weak mockery of a goodbye.

The door clicks shut.




This place had never felt more desolate.

Tried writing in first person POV. I hope it came out okay. /bites fingernails.

also, I'm sorry for doing this to otp. but. angst. angst is wonderful. and I'm feeling angsty. so yeah.

Please read and comment<3