You would think that Christmas when you’re 15 is not so different from the rest of the Christmases you’ve had.

Maybe not; if only my crazy parents weren’t mine and Jiyong wasn’t my bestfriend.

It’s been tradition in our family to have Jiyong come over for Christmas while I skip over to their house for the New Year. I’m not sure how we started this tradition but I recall it was a mutual decision on our part that if we wanted to be bestfriends forever we’d spend holidays with each other’s families.

My mother went all-out on her decorations this year. Replacing our old tree with a bigger one and draping the stairs with garland. Even our yard is sparkling with all the lights and snow present.

Dinner was fantastic. My tummy actually hurts from eating too much. We moved to the living room where we exchanged presents. I received a new book from my brother, lip gloss from my sister and a laptop from my parents. I was thankful for all their gifts especially my parents’.

As the night was winding down, Ji and I decided to drink hot chocolate. We were sitting on the bottom step of the stairs, talking about the gifts we received and decided that it was a good haul this year.

I then proceeded to give him mine; a scarf that I have crocheted myself.

“There, this will keep you warm and toasty.” I said as I fixed it around his neck.

“Thank you, Dara. I’ll wear this always” he said with a huge smile on his face.

“Now close your eyes for my gift.” he instructed me.

I closed my eyes and felt him attach something to my wrist. When I opened my eyes, I was already wearing a charm bracelet. I noted that the charms were all related to me: a rabbit, a dragon, a sneaker, a star.

I was touched by his gift and looked at him happily. “Thanks, I’ll be sure to treasure this.”

In that moment we were lost looking at each other with a happy smile on our faces. Then I started feeling awkward. What now?

“Oh look a mistletoe!” I heard my Mom say, pointing above Ji and me.

I looked up and indeed there it was, dangling above us, mocking us with the tradition it was well-known for. I inwardly groaned.

“Well? Aren’t you gonna kiss her Ji?” My father asked.

Thanks Dad! I thought with sarcasm. Really! Is he letting a boy kiss his beloved daughter?

I looked at Ji, all red in the face. Was he mad or embarrassed?

I looked back to my parents looking at us expectantly. Maybe they thought they were helping me with my first kiss. Well they didin’t know Ji beat them to the punch 7 years ago. If only I could tell them. I felt my own cheeks heat up as well.

“Do it already.” I murmured to Ji.

“I’m sorry, Dara” I heard Ji murmur as he neared his face to mine.

I closed my eyes, waiting. Then I felt warm lips brush my cheeks as light as snow but leaving me with warmth as potent as hot chocolate in winter.

I opened my eyes and was met by Ji’s deep brown eyes. 

I thought I heard my parents groan and complain that it wasn’t a real kiss but they left us alone to retire to their room down the hall.

The silence was deafening. What did just happen? Did he just apologize? Why did Ji do that? I was trying to process my thoughts about the kiss. It was different from his kiss on my lips where I was caught surprised or on my forehead where I felt safe and comforted. This kiss on my cheeks made me feel warm.

I didn’t want to feel weird around him. “Say something.” I urged him.

“What do you want me to say?” he asked, a smile playing on his lips.

Was he toying with me? “I don’t know. Tell me anything. What are you thinking right now?” I asked.

“Merry Christmas!” he blurted.

“W-what?” I asked, confused.

“Merry Christmas, Dara” he said, proceeding to resume drinking his hot chocolate as if nothing happened.

Okay. We’ve done this before. If he’s not saying anything then neither will I. We finished our hot chocolates, talking about our plans for the new year.

I saw him to the door as he was leaving, fixing the scarf on his neck.

As he turned to his house, I called out to him. “Hey Ji!”

He turned towards me, his brows raised.

I’m not sure if kisses need to mean anything. Maybe kisses were just kisses. No need to read too much into them.

Or maybe some kisses should be taken as they are. A kiss to disprove cooties, to congratulate, to comfort and a kiss under the mistletoe just means...

“Merry Christmas”