The other girls couldn’t have been happier with the news and were delighted to see Yoona slowly become more and more like herself again. The Super Junior oppas congratulated her as well, save for a certain, definitely upset fishy dancer. Yoona brushed the thought of him off as much as she could and tried to focus on her relationship with Nichkhun as well as her career.

SNSD was hugely successful once again with their second album Oh! and the girls’ schedules were filled everyday.  Sometime in the spring, Yoona, Yuri and Seohyun sang with Nichkhun, Taecyeon and Chansung in a commercial and Yoona was quite happy to spend time with Nichkhun.

However, when Yoona was alone in her room, in the dead of the night when Nichkhun had already fallen asleep, the memories came back. Memories of how she and Donghae were together, just like how she was with Nichkhun now. No matter how hard she wanted to forget…she missed him dearly and still loved him. No matter what, Yoona still loved Donghae.

Yoona ran into him from time to time- it was inevitable since she still loved her other Super Junior oppas dearly and tried to visit them as often as she could. Whenever they did encounter each other, they did their best to ignore the other’s presence. When they had  to communicate with each other, it was in the most formal terms possible. The other Super Junior members, obviously aware of the uncomfortable and tense atmosphere, tried various methods in getting the two to at least speak to each other. Leeteuk and Eunhyuk-oppa especially kept on dropping hints to Yoona that Donghae wanted to talk to her, but she simply ignored them.

In the beginning of December, Yoona got a call from Nichkhun.

“Yoona!”

“Nichkhun-oppa! How have you been?”

“I’m great. Listen, Yoona, I’ve been thinking. SNSD isn’t too busy right now, right? How about you take, say, a whole night off next week and come with me to Incheon- we’ll have our own room…”

“Together, Nichkhun?”

There was a slight pause on the phone and Yoona could just imagine her boyfriend smiling sheepishly. “Yeah.”

Yoona giggled and said, “Oh sure, oppa! I have to go now, bye! Love you~”

“Love you too!”

After hanging up, she got a text from Leeteuk imploring her to visit him at Super Junior’s dorm. Yoona hurried there as quickly as she could and when she arrived and found Leeteuk, she told him excitedly about her plans with Nichkhun.

“It’s going to be great, oppa! I get to spend the night with him!”

“Wait, wait, wait a second Yoona. Did he say that there would be one room for the both of you?”

“Yes…why? What’s wrong with that?” Leeteuk had an uncomfortable, knowing look on his face. “Well…it’s just…you guys are running the risk of getting caught by the media and…wait, just one room? If it’s one room, that means there’s probably only one bed as well…”

“So what? I- Oh my god, OPPA! That’s just dirty! And Nichkhun couldn’t possibly be thinking that…”

“Yoona, I’ve talked to Nichkhun before. He’s more enamored with you than you think he is. And…I want to protect you, Yoona. I don’t want you making decisions you’re going to regret.”

“Well you know what, Leeteuk-oppa? Maybe I am ready. Maybe I’ll give it up to Nichkhun and it will be the best decision I ever made.”

There was the sound of chairs being bumped into and Yoona and Leeteuk saw Donghae hastily making for the door and they knew that he had heard everything. Without even realizing what she was doing, Yoona went after him.

He wasn’t far down the hallway when Yoona shouted, “Donghae!” thus breaking the nearly year-long period of silence between them. He stopped for a moment, then continued to walk on as if he hadn’t heard her. Frustrated, Yoona ran after him, calling his name again.

Suddenly, an agitated Donghae snapped and shoved Yoona against the wall, trapping her there with both his arms. Trembling and near tears, she looked up into his eyes and was shocked with what she saw. He hadn’t been getting enough sleep lately, so the bruise-colored bags under his eyes were becoming much more noticeable. He also hadn’t been eating a lot, so his cheekbones were starting to become visible. But what scared her most was that she could easily see the haunting, wild, raging and, most of all, pain, in his eyes.

They stayed that way for a minute longer when Donghae let out an exasperated sigh and left. Just like that.

The weekend had finally come and Yoona couldn’t have been more nervous. Nichkhun was already at Incheon and had told her to take the 6:00 PM train to meet him there. As she waited for the train, she felt as if she was actually leaving and never truly coming back. If she met Nichkhun at Incheon, it would truly be the end and the memories would be forever buried.

The announcement for the 6:00 PM train sounded throughout the station. Taking a deep breath, Yoona got up, her hand clutching the ticket almost shaking.

Just then, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her slim figure and she was immediately overwhelmed with a familiar, warm scent.  Yoona was so stunned, she dropped her ticket on the ground and didn’t budge from his hold.

“…What are you doing here?” Yoona asked quietly.

“…I couldn’t just let you go off like that.” His head was resting on her shoulder, his breath tickling her ear.

“…Oppa, stop it. It’s over, according to you anyway. You can’t just waltz back to me and control what I’ll do with my life.”

“I’m not forcing you. If you want to go with Nichkhun, just go.”

Frustrated, Yoona was faced with the decision of staying in those warm arms, the ones she knew so well, or break free and get on the train.

“6:00 PM train to Incheon leaving in 2 minutes.”

“6:00 PM train to Incheon leaving in 1 minute.”

“Well?”

Yoona said nothing and left the ticket on the floor alone.

Since Yoona wasn’t expected to be anywhere that day, she really had no other choice but to follow Donghae wherever he wanted to go. There was no mistaking the awkward silence between them, afterwards Donghae insisting that he hadn’t planned on getting her by himself, that Eunhyuk had yelled at him and Leeteuk had begged him. Yoona, not really listening to him, stared out the window of the car.

Yoona sent Nichkhun a text:

“Sorry oppa, I can’t make it. My manager called and told me I’m needed in the studio. I didn’t know about it until today. Sorry again  :[“

“So, uh, how are things going with Nichkhun?” Yoona noticed that he was gripping the wheel so hard, his knuckles were white.

“Fine.”

He snorted. “What kind of answer is that? Things aren’t really that fine are they?”

“He’s busy! We’re ALL busy!” Yoona snapped at him.

Donghae turned to her and she noticed that a ghost of his familiar smile was on his face. “Well…I’m happy for you. I’m happy that you’ve found your own happiness without me.”

Suddenly, Yoona unlocked the door and opened it while the car was still in motion. Donghae yelped and slammed the brakes, dragging Yoona back in the car. “Im Yoona, have you lost your mind?!”

“How the hell can you say that, Donghae?!” Yoona was nearly screaming. “How can you just say that without even thinking about what’s happened?! How can you say you’re happy for me when I know you’re dying inside? When I still remember you telling me how much you loved me? When…when I still love you. So much.”

Yoona found herself crying once more in his presence. She only heard him mutter, “Why do you still drive me insane. To hell with this…” before the car parked on the side of the street and she felt herself get gathered up in his arms and his lips on hers.

 The flame of passion in his kiss grew with every passing second. Yoona completely lost herself, indulging in something she had thought she lost so long ago.

The radio was playing English songs for a change, something Yoona noticed in the back of her mind as Donghae’s lips continued to devour hers:

“I wrapped it up and sent it,

With a note saying “I love you” I meant it.

Now I know what a fool I’ve been,

But if you kiss me now, I know you’ll fool me again.”

Hours later, he was sprawled over her, the sheets rumpled, a bed spring definitely broken in Donghae’s bed and she was listening to how exactly his heartbeat was matching hers. “This…is a mistake,” she heard him say in a low voice.

“It’s a mistake I’m not regretting.”

“No seriously. What happens if Nichkhun finds out?”

“Who said he’s going to find out?”

Donghae grinned fully, the first time she had seen him do it in a year.

It was about four in the morning and there was practically no one outside. Donghae was walking Yoona back to the dormitory, occasionally glancing at her and giving her a small, secret smile.

“Yoona!”

She turned around and to her shock, saw Nichkhun running up to her.

“Hey- I got your text, it’s alright I…”

Then, he noticed she was with Donghae. Almost right away, he understood what happened.

“You son of a .”

Nichkhun walked over and shoved Donghae into the wall of a nearby building. The latter responded by punching the former in the face. They proceeded to engage in a skirmish while Yoona pleaded for them to stop. When it seemed like they weren’t going to listen to her anytime soon, she walked over herself and tried to yank the two apart.

Nichkhun accidentally knocked her away with his elbow. At that point, they were both by the curb and when he knocked into Yoona, she stumbled into the street. Right then, a delivery truck was driving down that street and was headed straight for Yoona.

Yoona was too shocked to scream or get out of the way.

What happened next seemed to go by so fast, it was as if time itself had warped.

There was an impact but to Yoona, it didn’t seem like she was dead from it. There was a whooshing of air, as if something knocked into her and they were flying momentarily before crashing onto the other side of the street.

She opened her eyes and saw that the something underneath her that protected her had been Donghae. Yoona realized that at the very last minute, he had sprinted across the street, shielded her from the truck and both of them had been knocked onto the sidewalk on the other side.

When she couldn’t say anything, Donghae smiled slightly and leaned up, kissing her lightly on the lips. Then, he suddenly winced and fell back down. Yoona gasped as blood trickled from his mouth and she realized that her hands were covered in blood. Donghae’s blood.

Yoona had been born a person who could not stand waiting for long periods of time. Waiting for news on Donghae’s condition was amongst the worst experiences she had ever had. All the members of Super Junior, DBSK, SHINee and her fellow band mates in SNSD had rushed to the hospital when they heard the news. Now they all crowded in the room outside the ER, waiting anxiously.

She had spent the past two hours crying to Leeteuk and Eunhyuk. Now, they held both her hands while Yoona was completely silent. Nichkhun was there as well, keeping his distance from Yoona.

“Yoona.” She turned to face her best friend who was holding something in his hand. It was a photograph of her and Donghae together. However, it was one that Yoona had never recognized before.

“This was a picture one of your anti-fans took of you together. She has an obsession with Donghae and stalked him- and one day came across you two together. She sent the picture to him and threatened to expose both of you to the media. Donghae couldn’t eat or sleep for days because he was so torn on whether he should keep openly loving you or protect your career. In the end, he valued you over his own happiness and tried to let you go for your own sake.”

Yoona’s mouth hung open. Eunhyuk poked her and she saw that he also had something with him. He offered it to her and she picked it up. It was a locket- when it opened, “YoonHae” was inscribed inside it.

“Donghae was going crazy. Sometimes I’d wake up in the mornings and find him by the window. He had stayed up all last night and was just staring. He had never ever fallen out of love with you, or lied about his feelings. He only lied when he said he wasn’t in love with you. This…was the Christmas present he was planning on getting you last year before everything happened.”

Yoona held the two objects together in her hand- and she wept.

The ER doors opened and Yoona automatically stood up. A doctor came out with a somber look on his face.

“Yoona!” She turned and saw Nichkhun trying to catch up to her. “Oh hey, Nichkhun-oppa!”

“You look nice today. Are you visiting again?”

She smiled and said, “Thanks, oppa. And yeah I am- the flowers are for him.”

After that traumatizing day, Nichkhun called her later and apologized profusely- and broke up with her. Yoona didn’t mind- she was honestly quite thankful he was still in her life as a friend.

“Isn’t he getting discharged today?”

“Yes. The doctors said it was incredibly lucky he wasn’t hit in his vital spots.” Nichkhun looked away, an embarrassed and guilty expression on his face.

“Ah, yeah…you get going, Yoona. I’ll catch you later.”

When Yoona checked into the hospital, she was surprised to find that Donghae had already left. She went outside, bouquet of flowers still in hand and called,

“Donghae! Donghae-oppa! Damn it, Lee Donghae, where are you?!”

She squeaked when he clapped his hands on her eyes. “Right here, you silly girl.”

She brushed his hands off and turned to face him. “What are you doing out of the hospital already?”

Donghae cocked his head and said, “Well, I figured since I was getting discharged today, I might as well get out as soon as possible. And…I couldn’t wait to see you.”

Both of them turned bright red. Yoona said:

“…Leeteuk-oppa and Eunhyuk-oppa told me…about why you tried to reject me. Oppa, why didn’t you tell me about it?”

Donghae suddenly became interested in the flowers planted by the hospital.

“Oppa, come on. Tell me.”

“…Because I thought it was better if you forgot about me. I felt that if I hurt you so much, you would never ever think of loving me ever again because I didn’t deserve it. I wasn’t able to protect you or our relationship from being threatened.”

“Well, I loved you. I thought of you even when I was with Nichkhun. I still love you, Donghae.”

Tears in her eyes, Yoona offered him the bouquet of flowers and whispered,

“Merry Christmas.”

He accepted it, then pulled her in a tight embrace. Planting his lips on hers, it was a sign that said he clearly didn’t want to let her go.

“Merry Christmas to you too, Yoona,” she felt his lips murmur in between the kiss. 

A/N: didja like it? :D

update! midterm exams are over! cee-cee shall be returning a regular posting schedule! 8D uhm. i haven't decided when/how but expect updates from my current series very soon. please check it out! it has lots of different [het] pairings with the main focus of the story on seohyun/kyuhyun :D ALSO! if you've never read it, please stop by and check out x3_strucked's fic It's Not My Fault I Fell For You- it's an awesome comedy :DDDDDDD

see you then! this is all for the yoonhae fics for now btw. you'll see different pairings in the next oneshots to come :DDD