@ladiiAJxoxo...as i was rereading your request just after i finished...i realized you said that both Sica AND the baby dies....damn T-T um um. i could write a different story if you really want. i'm sorryyyyy D: it's just that after reading your request (not very clearly) i just came up with this whole oneshot and started writing like crazy. mianhe for my incompetency T____T

ah...would you still like to read it anyway? (SORRY ONCE AGAIN. I'LL REWRITE ANOTHER ONE IF YOU WANT TT__TT) you can also feel free to request again...but i wanted to show you this story anyway since its jongsica anyway.... :x

Jonghyun heaved another sigh as he searched once more through the stack of files. The sound of papers rustling was the only thing that could be heard in his empty, spacious and lavishly decorated office. It was about three in the afternoon and golden sunlight streamed through the large windows, as though coaxing him to get outside and enjoy the fact that spring was on its way. But Jonghyun refused to leave his office until he finally found that number he knew for a fact that Kibum gave him.

When he was just about to give up, a sheet of notebook paper, crinkled at the edges, surfaced into sight. To anyone else, it would have looked like an opportunity to practice good recycling habits, but to Jonghyun, it currently looked like the most valuable thing in the world. He sighed, “Thank God,” whipped out his blackberry and punched in the number that had been messily scrawled onto the piece of paper.

Heart pounding, he waited anxiously as he pressed the call button. As the line continued to ring, flashbacks of her smiling face, her infectious laughter, her body, her voice, the way she used to make the world look a little less dark, everything about her came rushing back. Jonghyun thought: If Kibum got the right connections…and this number is valid…she might come back.

There was the sound of the other line picking up and a male voice with an American accent asked in English: “Hello?” Jonghyun’s heart leaped and in the best English he could muster, he carried on a conversation with the person on the other end.

His hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as he eased his BMW out of the parking lot and drove down on the familiar route home. Home, to Jonghyun, meant returning to a large, gated mansion with state of the art security that was in one of the nicest parts of Seoul. Home used to mean coming back to a brilliant smile, shoulder-length honey-blonde curls and open, porcelain arms filled with the scent of apricots.

Jonghyun felt that creeping urge to rip out a pack of Marlboros and have a good smoke, but he calmed his nerves as he remembered how he had quit for her and how he was going to stay clean for her. Instead, he immersed himself in memories of how she used to respond whenever he planted butterfly kisses on her neck, how she used to squirm from embarrassment yet stare at him with heated gazes that clearly begged for more.

So lost he was in thought, he nearly ran over a normal citizen on the street. Jonghyun slammed on the brakes of the shiny BMW which just missed the man by a few inches. The man cursed him off and, slinking down in his seat, Jonghyun lightly tapped the gas pedal and drove on.

When he returned to the mansion, Jonghyun gave the maid that opened the door for him a curt nod, and then immediately hurried off to the room like he always did. Her room or, rather, her sanctuary.

Jonghyun got to the password-locked door that could only be opened by through verbally issuing the password to the voice sensors of the lock. Jonghyun uttered, a small lump forming in his throat:

“Suyeon.”

His voice was automatically recognized and with a click, the doors slid open and Jonghyun stepped into the cavernous, beautiful room that was her sanctuary.

Most of the room was bathed in golden light from the slowly waning afternoon sun. The little colored glass pieces that hung in parts of the room sparkled and shone little bursts of colors on the rare and beautiful plants placed all throughout the room. It was a strange and magical place to live in, yet Jonghyun wasted no time stopping to admire the room. He strode quickly over to a man in a white coat sitting at a hardwood desk by the side taking notes.

When the man looked up and saw Jonghyun approach him, he got up and bowed very low.

“Jonghyun-gakha,” the man addressed him respectfully.

“Jinki-hyung…how is she?”

As usual, a small seed of hope germinated inside his heart, but one look at Jinki’s expression immediately crushed it. “She’s…relatively the same as yesterday. Her health is rejuvenating rapidly and she is much more active than before. However, her mind…she is still unable to recognize faces at first sight very well or think things through rationally, and her memory has not returned yet.”

Jonghyun nodded slowly, his eyes downcast. Jinki put a hand on Jonghyun’s shoulder and said in a low voice, “Don’t lose hope, Jjong. Things may seem bleak now, but everyone is here for both of you. We’ll help you bring her back, I promise.” Jonghyun swallowed and held out his hand. Jinki smiled a bit and clasped it, bumping his body into his in the handshake they always did in secret.

Jonghyun took a deep breath and approached the slightly raised platform of cushions that was at the other end of the room, next to the ceiling-high windows. It was this area of the room that was most ornate and the most fantastic. Two slender trees grew from a tiny garden next to the platform and a sparrow flew from branch to branch, chirping occasionally. A small fountain bubbled nearby.

She sat on one of the many cushions on the platform, her back with honey-blonde curls that cascaded down past her shoulders facing towards him. She had on a simple, flowing white dress and completely bathed in the sunlight so that she glowed with golden brilliance. To any random person looking on, she probably seemed to be the most fantastical thing within the realm of this strange wonderland.

Jonghyun took extreme caution not to startle her, but there was no need- her attention was completely fixated on the rotating mobile of a sparkling rainbow that hung on the tree branch nearest her.  It consisted of jewelry- in fact, it was a hanging collection of every piece of valuable gem Jonghyun had ever given her as a gift.

“Pretty colors…” she murmured, her glazed eyes still totally focused on the shimmering lights.

Jonghyun cleared his throat and said in a soft voice:

“Hello, Jessica.”

She turned around suddenly. Jonghyun felt a stab of pain surge through his heart as he recognized the confusion that danced through her eyes every time she saw someone.

“Hello…who…who are you?” she asked in a dazed, somewhat sing-song voice.

Jonghyun swallowed once more and managed a smile just for her. “Silly, Sica. It’s me, your husband. Jonghyun. Remember? We got married to each other.” He stood there while he watched his words slowly but surely register in her mind. After a while, Jessica gazed at him with wide eyes, like a child who finally understood mathematics or how to read.

“Oh…! Jjong, welcome back…how…was…how was work?”

Jonghyun let out the breath he had been holding and he smiled genuinely. “It was alright,” he said, making sure to speak slowly so she could understand. “Did you have fun today?”

“Ah…not really…I was so lonely, Jjong…no one was here to play with me. I miss…kids…I miss being a kid…I just wish we could…” Jessica came to a sudden halt in her words which totally startled Jonghyun. Before he or Jinki could blink, a tear slipped out of the corner of her eye, then another and another until they were pouring from her eyes and she began to sob heartbrokenly.

Jonghyun immediately gathered her up into his arms and tried his best to calm her down, saying, “Shh…Shh…it’s okay, Sica, I’m here, it’s going to be alright…”

“My child…” he could hear her choke out in between her wails of sorrow. “My baby…the one who looked just like you, he’s gone, he’s gone just like that…”

“Jinki!” Jonghyun cried out desperately. The doctor quickly approached Sica and said in a voice which Jonghyun could hear the strain of worry and tension in it:

“Jessica...Jessica, please, calm down. Take a deep breath. It’s me, Jinki-seosang. Just lie down, keep taking deep breaths while I go get medicine for you.” Feeling restricted and utterly helpless, Jonghyun could only sit by Jessica’s side, occasionally murmuring to her to soothe her and caressing her face.

Finally, Jinki had administered the pills to her and Jessica was asleep in his lap. Overcome with longing and love, he lightly brushed his finger across her cheek and bent down to kiss her on the forehead.

“You don’t like her being on drugs all the time do you, Jonghyun?” Jonghyun looked up at Jinki. They had known each other since they were young and Jinki had always had a knack of reading his mind.

“I just feel hopeless…like I can never help her enough.”

“It’s been a while since she’s had a fit like this…it proves that she is recovering, but the process is likely to be very slow.” Jonghyun was silent for a while as he kept his gaze on her. Flashbacks of the time when she was so happy, so alive and bright that she had attracted him right from the beginning and it had been love at first sight, at least for Jonghyun.

Jinki spoke up: “That reminds me- did you call the number that Kibum found for you?”

“Yes- it got through. Apparently, Dr. Charles Radcliffe studied abroad for a time in Seoul and met Kibum there. He told me he was definitely interested in reviewing our case…”

“But…?” asked Jinki.

Jonghyun sighed, “But…he says he requires we go to the U.S. for special treatments. Financially, it’s no problem for us…but, I just don’t want to tear Jessica away from the only home she’s known. I can’t imagine what would happen if I did.”

About two hours later, a buzz came through one of the many intercoms in the mansion, indicating to Jonghyun that there were visitors. A few minutes later, he was letting Krystal and Tiffany come in through the immensely tall doors and embracing them both.

“We thought we ought to visit,” Tiffany said, kissing Jonghyun on the cheek. “We both left work early and somehow, we ran into each other on the way there and decided to come visit Unnie together,” Krystal informed him as she hugged him affectionately.

When Tiffany went to the bathroom for a few minutes, Krystal looked him in the eye and asked, “Is…Is Unnie still in her…condition?” Jonghyun nodded solemnly and asked, “Would you like to see her?”

Krystal opened to say something, but instead her breath hitched. “I want to. Even though I saw her two days ago. I’m just afraid...of her not recognizing me again. You know how it is, Jonghyun. It’s painful for us, the ones who love her most, that she has such a hard time remember who we were. I just wish…” She broke off hurriedly.

Jonghyun shook his head and said, “Don’t worry too much about it, Krystal. Come…it’ll make you happy to see her now anyway. According to Jinki, she’s doing much better than before.”

Jonghyun and Krystal sat to the side, mugs of tea in hand while Tiffany was on the platform with Jessica. They were further away so they couldn’t hear the conversation, but Jonghyun could make out the hand motions and facial expressions somewhat. He could see Tiffany talking to Jessica, who still had a clueless look on her face. Tiffany seemed to be enunciating every word, pointing to herself then Jessica.

After about a minute, a smile broke out on Jessica’s face and she offered her hand to Tiffany. Jonghyun could practically hear the words she mouthed to her best friend: “So you’re my friend, right? I’m so happy! Would you like to play?” Tiffany brought her hand to her face and Jonghyun assumed she was crying. However, when she turned slightly, he caught a view of her profile…and a small, hopeful smile played on her lips.

“…I heard you plan on taking Unnie to America to be treated by some high-class doctor.” Krystal’s voice snapped Jonghyun back to attention. He wasn’t even shocked at this point since there was no other way she could have found out.

“Jinki-hyung told you, huh? He beat me to it…”

“How long did this Dr. Radcliffe say you two had to stay there for?”

“…Depends. He first wants to meet us to see how serious Sica’s condition is.”

There was a pause before Krystal asked, “So were you planning on asking me how I felt about it?”

“It seems only fair to consult you first. After how I’ve pretty much screwed everything up…”

“Stop it, Jonghyun. You did not screw anything up…”

“She used to be so happy, the radiant sun to my day,” Jonghyun was on a roll now. “After I came into her life, after that one night I can never take back…I must be the worst piece of scum in the world, all I can do is throw money around…”

“Jonghyun! Please!” Krystal nearly shouted. Jonghyun stared at her. The Krystal he knew usually never raised her voice to get a point across. She sighed and said, “Jonghyun…I don’t think you know this…but Unnie was so happy the day she met you. She came home smelling like sea salt and when I asked her what happened, she told me she met the most amazing guy on the beach- that was you. Sure you two had rough moments- but whenever you overcame them, Sica-unnie would tell me all about it with that infectious grin that always comes on whenever she talks about you. I will never blame you for what happened- it was no one’s fault. I’m sorry she lost the child but I want both of you to get better. Besides…I…I miss the way Unnie used to be too…”

This time, Jonghyun definitely heard her voice crack and realized she was crying. “Silly girl,” he murmured, tousling her hair like he used to do when she was younger. “Of course I’ll bring your sister back. I’m not perfect, I know…but I will never, ever abandon her. I’ll go with her myself to the U.S.- I’ll have Kibum and Minho be in charge while I’m gone. And I’ll keep in touch.”

Krystal smiled and gave him a hug. “You really are the best husband Sica could ever have wished for,” she whispered into his ear.

Tiffany approached them with tears in her eyes. She leaned into Krystal and Jonghyun heard her say, “Krystal…your sister is calling for you.” A bright hope shined through her eyes and they glistened with tears as she rushed to her older sister.

Later on, Jonghyun lay on the cushions with Jessica cradled in his arms. She was still intensely focused on the jewels that dangled above them.

“Ah…ah! Jjong! I remember…I…I found something!” Confused, Jonghyun sat up as she searched excitedly through a box that was next to the platform. Jessica, smiling brightly like a child, took out a familiar photo album and displayed it on the cushion proudly.

Jonghyun stifled a gasp as he realized that it was the photo album dedicated to their wedding. He rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating- but sure enough, the curly silver cursive that read “Jonghyun & Jessica: Together & Forever in Love.” He thought she had accidentally destroyed it months ago in one of her fits…she had kept it all this time?

“Look, Jjong!” She pointed to a picture of a laughing Jonghyun who was carrying an embarrassed yet smiling Jessica up a flight of stairs bridal style. “Oh…they look so happy…don’t they look a lot like us, Jjong? Wouldn’t you love to be happy like them?” Jonghyun gazed at the assortments of pictures and a wave of memories he had locked away came roaring back.

There was a picture of her on the beach, wearing the very same simple white dress she was wearing now- the same image that have captivated him from the start. That radiant, carefree smile- the same one she had given him, even when she found out he was the heir to one of the largest corporations in Seoul- still told him: “I don’t care- I still love you.” There were other pictures friends had taken of them on dates and of course, there were various pictures of the wedding.

It had been the absolute best moment of his life, when he had simply swept her off her feet and kissed her, the first kiss between husband and wife. The cheers, the smiling faces, the confetti falling lightly above their heads- none of that registered in his mind except for the beautiful, lovely woman he was so fortunate to marry.

As he gazed at her now, he realized that, despite the dark bags that could be found under her eyes, despite how her cheekbones stuck out from her bad health…She’s…she’s still the same. She’s still there. There’s still hope. I love her.

A confused look crossed Jessica’s face and she uttered, “Jjong?”

Seconds later, he had cupped her face into his hands and kissed her with just as much passion as he did the day he married her. It took all his will to control his urges, but in the end, he simply embraced the woman he fell in love with and still loved as tightly as he could, vowing to never let go.

Pressing her head close to him, he whispered, “Jessica…Suyeon…I’ll bring you back. I promise. We’ll go to the U.S…you’ll be cured. I’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy again. Even if you forget me, I’ll never forget you. You are so precious to me…” With that, he kissed her forehead again and closed his eyes, letting sleep take him into the world of dreams where they reunited with the child they lost.