Jonghyun, Taemin, and Key were woken up in the morning by the appa bursting into the room looking panicked. It took all of two seconds for him to locate Jonghyun in what was technically Key’s bed and calm down, but it was enough to put the boys on alert. Jinki sat heavily on the foot of the bed Key and Taemin were snuggled into, his head dropping into his hands momentarily before he looked up at Jonghyun, then over at Key and Taemin, then back at Jonghyun.

“Did you have a bad night?” Jinki finally asked. Jonghyun nodded slowly, his hands going to Roo automatically as the small dog moved closer to him. “Alright then...just next time, someone please let me know if someone’s sleeping in a place other than their own bed. I almost had a heart attack.”

“Mianhae appa...” Jonghyun said softly. Jinki shook his head.

“Don’t be sorry. It’s perfectly fine.” Jinki said, getting up. “You guys can go back to sleep if you want. I have to run some errands before we bring Roo in for her evaluation, anyway. I’m going to be gone most of the morning.”

“What do you have to do?” Taemin asked, a yawn catching up with him a moment later.

“Just have to pay some bills and do other crappy things that come with being an adult. Don’t grow up, ok guys? Just stay sixteen forever.” He said, and Key snorted.

“De, appa.” They said together, and he smiled.

“I’ll let Roo and Eve out for you guys, ok? Just remember to bring them in later.” He said, calling Roo over before heading out of the room. The boys settled back into their beds, each intent on going back to their dreams. Not a single one of them was still awake when Jinki finally put the car in drive and headed into town.

Jonghyun woke first, maybe two hours after Jinki left, and sat up slowly. He glanced over at Key and Taemin on the other bed, then eased himself off the one he had claimed the night before and quietly made his way out of the room. He went down to the kitchen door and slid it open, watching Roo and Eve run into the house, then closed it again and went to sit on the couch.

The entire night he had been plagued by nightmares, waking up time and time again calling out for Minho. The dreams had left him in a puddle of tears more than once, and Key had groggily moved from his place with Taemin each time to comfort him even as the images continued to flash through his mind while his eyes remained open. Sometimes it was a faceless woman, sometimes it was a dark-eyed man in a suit, but no matter who it was, their intent was the same - stealing him away from his family. Even sitting in the sunlit living room, Jonghyun was haunted by a feeling of danger.

He knew he could fix it all by telling them what was going on, but something stopped him every time he tried. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he didn’t feel like he could tell them. He felt that, somehow, he had made this mess himself by not speaking up earlier, and now he would just have to deal with the consequences. Worse than that, though, was Sangho’s words and implications. He was weak, too weak to handle anything without someone standing behind him and pulling the strings, speaking for him and taking care of him.

He shook his head, thinking back on how he was when he had first been caught. Always afraid, always trying to protect himself from the people around him. Then Minho had managed to break through his defenses, pulling along Key, Taemin, and Jinki, and all of his issues had spread to involve them. He remembered telling Key that the reason he acted the way he did was because of the others inhabiting their room, and he almost laughed. It was more and more true each day, and he didn’t know how to go back to relying on himself. He wasn’t sure he wanted to.

He stayed where he was, so deep in thought he didn’t even notice when Key came down the stairs until the other was sitting on the couch beside him. He looked up, surprised, and Key bit his lip before reaching out and hugging him. Jonghyun took a moment to react, but then he returned the embrace, finding comfort in his friend, his brother. It was almost enough to crack his fragile defenses and make him admit to everything, but he refused to let himself, and instead squeezed Key tighter.

“What is going on with you, Jonghyun?” Key asked, and Jonghyun shook his head.

“I can’t tell you. M...mianhae.” Jonghyun said, sounding regretful. Key seemed surprised by that answer, and he leaned back slightly to look at his hyung.

“You know I’m here, though, right?” Key asked, and Jonghyun nodded. Key sighed. “Well, let’s get you dressed, ok? Appa should be back soon, it’s almost noon.”

“De.” Jonghyun agreed, standing with the umma and heading up the stairs to his room.

Key, who had announced only days prior that he was done dressing the older boy, now dug through Minho’s dresser until he found a long sleeved shirt, and he held it out to Jonghyun with gentle eyes. Jonghyun took it, sliding his own shirt off silently and pulling Minho’s on. There was a faint scent of him on it, and it nearly brought Jonghyun to tears. He didn’t want to leave the house today, or maybe ever again. He could feel his anxiety rising up inside of him and the more he thought about even coming close to the door the more upset he got. Key approached him with a pair of jeans he had managed to wear out to the perfect fit, but he didn’t take them.

“Jjong..?” Key said softly, but Jonghyun didn’t look at him. A moment later they heard the sound of Jinki’s car coming into the driveway, but Jonghyun only wanted to get away from the windows, from the doors, from anything that even hinted at being dangerous to his suddenly fragile mind. “Jonghyun, are you ok?”

His only response was silence, and within a minute or so Jinki was in the doorway. He stepped in the room silently, seeing Jonghyun was in another world, and he approached his son with gentle movements. Jonghyun didn’t move a single muscle, even as terrified tears began sliding down his face. What was this? There was a term...a phobia he had been diagnosed with...what was it? A...agoraphobia! Fear of open spaces, crowds, windows, doors. Why did it chose now of all times to act up? Jinki slowly put his arms around Jonghyun, and he watched as his son leaned on him, then gripped his shirt with trembling fingers.

“Are you going to be alright?” Jinki asked. Jonghyun felt his stomach roll and he shook his head. “What’s wrong, Jjongie? Did something happen?”

“I...I can’t do it...” He said. Key watched on from his place on the side, overwhelming concern taking over even as Roo ran into the room, nudging at her owners ankle with her soft head.

“What can’t you do?” Jinki asked, gently coaxing the words out of his son.

“I can’t go. I can’t go outside today. I can’t.” He said, his eyes still wide even as he pressed his face against his appa’s chest. He wanted to hide. Why couldn’t he hide?

“I have to bring Roo to the evaluation, Jjongie. Do you want to stay here with Taemin and Key?” He asked softly, and Jonghyun shook his head. “Do you want to come?”

“I want Minho.” He whispered brokenly. Jinki felt like he was going to join his son in crying at that moment, and Key’s eyes were damp as well. “Can I call him?”

“Of course you can.” Jinki said, looking around for Jonghyun’s cell phone. He located it on the bedside table and flipped it open, dialing Minho’s number and handing the phone to Jonghyun.

It wasn’t easy, and it was far from calm, but after twenty minutes - Jonghyun’s longest phone call to date - Jonghyun and Roo were in the passenger seat of the car. Jonghyun had his hands over his eyes, his body trembling as Jinki clicked the seat belt in place, and Roo was desperately trying to calm him down. Once the car was started Jinki flipped through the radio stations until he found one he knew Jonghyun liked, and he ran his fingers through Jonghyun’s ever growing hair before starting to drive. He knew they were running a little late, but he didn’t worry himself too much over it as they pulled into the parking lot.

“Are you gonna be able to carry Roo?” Jinki asked. Jonghyun nodded, finally lowering his hands and turning to the backseat to call the sweet girl forward. His eyes went to two takeout boxes on the seat first, though, and blinked in surprise. How many times had Jinki gone out to eat in the time he was gone? He shook his head, leaning forward and pulling Roo into his arms. “You ready to go in?”

“D-de...” Jonghyun said, not moving to get out of the car or even unbuckle himself. Jinki reached over, hitting the release, then pushing his door open. He closed it firmly, then went around to Jonghyun’s side and pulled his door open. Jonghyun seemed startled to see the appa there, and looked up with big eyes. “Mian..”

“It’s fine.” Jinki said, watching Jonghyun get out and head toward the building quickly. Jinki shook his head, closing the door and following him in. When he got inside he saw Jonghyun standing in a defensive posture, Roo in his arms and nudging his chin softly as a woman spoke in quiet tones with a kind face to the nervous boy. “Jonghyun?”

“Appa!” He said, his tone relieved. Jinki approached him, his hand going to rub Jonghyun’s back automatically. The woman looked up at Jinki with a smile, then back at Jonghyun.

“Oh, there we go. Are you feeling better now?” She asked. Jonghyun looked down, feeling embarrassed.

“He’s having a bad day.” Jinki said. She nodded.

“Is he an only child?” She asked. Jinki smiled widely - there was nothing he liked to talk about more than his boys.

“He’s the oldest of four. All boys. The youngest just turned sixteen a few months ago.”  He said proudly. She looked surprised.

“How old is he?” She asked, pointing to Jonghyun. Jinki pet Jonghyun’s hair softly.

“You wanna tell her?” Jinki asked. Jonghyun shook his head, and Jinki smiled apologetically. “He’ll be 17 in two months.”

“Really?” She asked, her eyes wide. Jinki nodded, knowing Jonghyun looked closer to fourteen.

“They’re all adopted.” Jinki explained, and Jonghyun moved closer to him suddenly. Jinki’s eyebrows raised up and he slid his arm around Jonghyun’s shoulders.

An hour and half later, Jonghyun was in tears. Roo very nearly met the requirements, but she fell short in just one area - knowing the difference between work and play with a harness on. Jinki had him pulled off to the side, his hands wiping at Jonghyun’s face. He didn’t want to leave Roo there, even if it meant he could bring her anywhere after.

“You’ve got me, you’ve got Taemin, you’ve got Kibum, and you’ve got Minho.” Jinki said, and Jonghyun nodded. “You’ll be ok, and she’ll come with me to pick you up from school on Wednesday, ok?”

Jonghyun started to nod, but then what Jinki said actually sank in. School. Monday and Wednesday. Two more days when he would be completely alone, completely vulnerable, not even his cell phone in case Sangho did show up, and the situation was too much for him to handle. He moved forward, his arms going around Jinki’s waist silently. Jinki’s eyebrows went up, and he hugged Jonghyun with a concerned expression.

“Jonghyun?” Jinki said, and Jonghyun stayed silent, just holding onto him.

“I’ll be ok.” He finally said, nodding. “Can we go home?”

“Yeah. Yeah, come on.” Jinki said, looking up at the trainer. She give a thumbs up, nodding in understanding, and Jinki guided Jonghyun out to the car.

The ride home was quiet, with Jonghyun picking at his jeans in obvious discomfort. He was so intent on removing any invisible lint that may have been on his pants that he almost didn’t notice the long black hair on the seat. He picked it up, his eyes slightly wide. It had to have been two feet long - much too long for anyone they knew. Had someone broken into Jinki’s car? He started looking around desperately for other signs, hints of anything gone missing, but everything seemed intact. Jinki glanced over at him after a moment, a confused expression on his face.

“What are you looking for?” He asked. Jonghyun stilled. He didn’t see any signs of anything missing, so he saw no reason to worry the appa. It could have been a stray hair that had blown in while the door was open anyway.

“N-nothing.” He said, sitting back. Jinki looked unconvinced, but he changed the subject anyway.

“Are you going to be ok at home with just Taemin and Key tomorrow night?” He asked. Jonghyun looked up, his eyes wide.

“Are you going somewhere?” He asked.

“A friend of mine wants to meet for dinner. I can cancel if you need me to stay home.” He offered, and Jonghyun shook his head. He didn’t want to get in his way of having a social life.

“Just promise you’ll answer your phone if we need you.” Jonghyun requested, and Jinki smiled.

“Always.”

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So, Jonghuyn's on a backslide. It's gonna get worse before it gets better, fair warning. Also, why did everyone stop commenting so suddenly? Did I manage to piss you guys off? It's gonna get better, I promise. <3