He is touching me, my hair with his soft hands that smell of some kind of exotic fruit as he hums some weird song to me. I am amazed at how calm I am with him, an older man. An older man that looks this good and I am keeping my cool, not getting over excited or anything of the sorts. My head is on his lap, my eyes closed as he leans over me, now actually singing to me. 

"You are such a good little boy," he says when the song is over, his fingers still laced in my hair.

I shake my head. "You don't know me that well." Pain enters my chest.

"Don't put yourself down, my little G-Dragon."

"G-Dragon?" 

"That is your new name," he whispers, kissing my forehead than the tip of my nose and before he presses his lips to mine, I wake up, my heart fluttering in my chest like a bird stuck in a tightly cramped cage.

"Honey! Honey! Are you okay?" I hear my friend yell from outside the door before she scampers in and jumps on my bed and into my arms. "What happened? Did you have a bad dream?"

I shrug, hugging her to me, Gaho barking off the bed. I shush him and laugh.

"No." I shake my head. "It wasn't bad."

"Oh?" she squeaks, looking at me in the eyes. "Was it about a boy?"

"Maybe." I laugh nervously, blushing a little.

"Who!?"

"Uh...you don't know him." I get out of the bed, helping her to her feet. "Hey, I will be leaving soon." I run a hand through my blond hair and sigh, stupidly wondering if ever I will be able to actually know Top. But, he was only interested in my voice, a man like that could not be gay. It's not possible. 

"Okay!" She smiles and kisses my cheek before leaving to let me change.

I remove my shirt, and with slow hands, I touch my chest, eyes closed. If I was a girl I bet i could get him without a problem. But I am no girl. Maybe if I was, so many people would not have left me over the years. A perfect little girl. Something I will never be. I dig my nails into my ribs, the pain to agonizing to explain. Tears form in my eyes as I sit on the bed, refusing to let go of my skin. I deserve this pain. I deserve so much more.

(sorry that the chapters are so short! I am just trying to get a story setting and stuff lol, stay with me everyone!)