Chapter 16
Who I Am(A/N KEVIN. DONGHO. KISEOP. ELI. SOOOOO HOTTTT~OMG, THEIR TEASER VIDEO, ME=MINDED ~ ALSO B.A.P’S COME BACK WITH POWER! OMG, HAVE Y’ALL SEEN THE TEASER FOR POWER? SO FREAKIN’ HOT LIKE TOTAL MIND , BRO~ ZELO’S Y PINK HAIR AND JONGUP’S, DAEHYUN’S, HIMCHAN’S, YONGGUK’S Y BROWN HAIR AND YOUNGJAE’S Y BLONDE HAIR THAT LOOKS LIKE KEY’S HAIR IN LUCIFER EXCEPT IT’S ALL BLONDE!)
^Excuse my rant, I have severe Fan Girl Syndrome(AKA FGS.)
I just want you baby here right now now now
Saranghago ittan marya
Binggeul binggeul binggeul binggeul (ni juwireul) binggeul binggeul binggeul binggeul
Binggeul binggeul binggeul binggeul (oneuldo) binggeul binggeul binggeul binggeul
(Bingguel Bingguel – U-KISS)
-Chunji’s POV-
They stared at me, “Chanhee, what did you say?” mom asked, shaking her head. “I don’t think I heard you right.” She said in a disbelieving tone. “I’m gay, Eomma, I kissed a boy, I like boys.” I said, my eyes were cold but honest.
“Chanhee….what….the ?” Dad whispered, “Jiyong, watch your language!” mom said weakly, her eyes were terrified and confused. I met those eyes and nodded, “I’m gay, that’s why me and L. Joe were fighting, you guys know he’s a big homophobe.” Things went eerily silent for a while, my parents and I just staring at each other until my dad expressionless voice cut the glass.
“Get out.”
I stared at him surprised, so did mom, “What?” I asked weakly, “Get the out of my house, you ing !” dad exploded and angrily pointed at the door, “Jiyong!” mom cried, “You can’t kick him out!” dad glared at her, “I can and I am, get out, Chanhee.” “Appa…please…” I whimpered, “I will have no sinners in my house, get out before I get my gun out.” The look in his eyes tore my heart apart and I hesitantly moved myself numbly towards the door. I opened the door and looked back at them, desperately hoping my dad would laugh and say ‘just kidding!’ but he didn’t, he just gave me a heartbreaking look. “Eomma?” I whimpered, trying one last time. She bit her lip and looked away from me and said quietly “Go on, Chanhee, leave.”
I left the house, the place where I grew up, deeply loved by my parents, now I was on the streets, deeply hated by them. Tears came to my eyes but I forced them back violently, a dry sob escaped my throat but I bit my fist to stop the others from leaving. My shoulders were shaking and all I wanted to do was lie down and die. My chest hurt so bad that I fell to my knees and wrapped my arms around myself, all of this on my front lawn, or what used to be my front lawn, now it was the lawn of a childless couple. “Ow.” I whimpered as my chest started to throb in pain more, “OW!” I beat my fist against the grass and tried my hardest to stop the flood that wanted to flow out of my eyes. I looked up the road where my best friend of 16 years was killed. My vision got blurred as the tears built up in my eyes, I wiped my eyes and forced myself to stand up on my week knees, I couldn’t stay out here all night. I had to find someplace to stay before it got dark, breathing in choked gasps; I headed towards Christine’s house.
-Dara’s (Chunji’s Mom) POV-
I sat in the living room, barely managing myself from crying. “Dara, are you okay?” Jiyong asked and that was it, that was all I could take. I burst into hot tears and buried my face in my hands. Chanhee… “What did we do, Jiyong?!” I screamed, wishing so desperately that we didn’t kick him out. We watched him walk away, we watched him scream, we watched him cry…. “He’s gay; I do not want a in my house!” Jiyong cried angrily, “He’s our son! Jesus Christ, we kicked our son out in the middle of the night!” I shrieked, wrapping my arms around myself as Chanhee had done. “I want have Chanhee back in this house if he loves boys! I won’t have it! Do you want a as a son?!” I furiously shook my head “No! I don’t want our son to be gay! But…I can’t stop worrying….Jiyong, what if something happens to him?” I asked worriedly, “Let it be a lesson to him.” I looked up at the wall where the picture of Chanhee we took last year hung and busted into a new round of fresh tears. “Oh, Chanhee! Why does it have to be our Chanhee?!” I sobbed, “Were we bad parents to him? Did we do something that made him gay?” Jiyong shook his head, “No, it wasn’t our fault, Chanhee’s gay, that’s that, let’s get to bed and we can figure out everything in the morning, okay?” He gently led me upstairs as I cried over our lost son.
-Chunji’s POV-
I rang Christine’s bell and her mom answered, “Oh, goodness, Chanhee, are you okay?” she asked worriedly, “I-Is C-Christine home?” I whispered, she nodded and put her arm around me and led me upstairs to Christine’s room. She knocked on the door and Christine opened it, “Chunji!” she cried, “What’s wrong?” her mom removed her arms around me and Christine took my hand and led me over to her bed, she sat me down and I wrapped my arms around her tightly needing someone to hold. “Eomma, can you let us talk?” she asked anxiously and her mom nodded and shot me another concerned look and shut Christine’s door. “What’s wrong, Chunji?” Christine demanded, I opened my mouth to tell her and immediately exploded into sobs. She held me tightly as I cried, I hated crying in front of people, and it seemed like I’ve been doing that a lot lately, but I had never broken down as hard as I did now. I cried for a while and it was hardcore sobbing. “Chunji, you’re scaring me, what happened?” Christine said with fear in her voice, my sobs slowly turned in choked gasps as I tried to settle myself and breathe, I shakily explained everything that had happened and found myself crying more as I did. Christine eyes watered as I spoke and she hugged me tightly, “Oh, god, Chunji, you can stay here, let’s ask my mom if she’s okay with it first, okay?” she said gently. She grabbed my hand and led me downstairs where her parents were sitting on the couch watching something on Netflix. The sight of them made me break down a little more, they still loved their daughter, Christine deserved love, she was straight. As I began to cry again I slapped my hands over my leaking eyes in embarrassment. “Eomma, Appa, can Chunji stay with us? He…something happened between him and his parents.” Christine said but I shook my head, “No, tell them, Christine, I won’t right staying here, unless they know the whole story.” I whispered, so Christine told them, and wrapped her arms around me as I cried again. “I’m so sorry, Chanhee, of course you can stay here, I’ll help you guys set up a mattress in Christine’s room.” Mrs. Kwon said with a warm but sympathetic smile, she hugged me tightly and left to Christine’s room. Christine patted the spot next to her on her bed and I crawled in next to her, I looked into her eyes and said “Is it wrong that I’m gay, Christine?” She shook her head violently, “No, it’s not, Chunji! They’re just homophobic idiots that are blind from the bible.” I sighed “Can you come with L. Joe, Changjo, Ricky, Niel and I tomorrow to talk to C.A.P?” she nodded “Of course I will, Chunji.” I started shaking and she held me tightly, “Thank you so much, Christine, I wish you knew how much this means to me, you’re such a great friend to me.” I whimpered and squeezed my eyes shut begging for sleep. Christine started softly singing Lullaby for a Stormy Night, and I swallowed down the lump in my throat. Eomma use to sing that to me when I was little and afraid of storms and Christine knew it. Her voice was soothing and I tried to imagine myself five years-old, during a storm and lightly crying, that everything was okay and my parents still loved me because I was straight, that this was just a stormy night that would turn into a beautiful day, but as I fell into the dark abyss of sleep, all I could think about is that this was only the beginning.
(A/N Okay, you’re mad at me, I KNOW! I haven’t updated in like 3 days, I know, I , but did y’all enjoy it? Lol, I started this chapter on the 19th but got too lazy to finish it so I just did bit by bit. COMMENT PLEASE! Bye, bye, I have U-KISS waiting for me, lol, no, I wish. COMMENT!)
Comments