Your heart was still racing when you closed the door to your apartment. Raising your hand to your chest, you felt the drum beat keep a steady pace that was well above its normal rhythm.

He’d almost kissed you. He’d almost kissed you.

That had to be what he was doing, right? With the closed eyes and forehead touch? And, oh, god, did you want him to kiss you. How many times had your imagination fluttered in that direction when you weren’t keeping it in check?

Gemma and Cam were lounging on the couch watching some drama on the television and hadn’t caught on to your presence until now. The former tilted her head at you, frowning.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, jumping up from her spot and walking over to you. Out of instinct, she reached out and placed the back of her hand against your cheek. “Why are you so warm? Are you getting sick?”

You shook your head adamantly. “No, I’m fine.”

Taking a step back, Gemma smirked. “Okay, I know we silently agreed to not bring it up anymore, but did something happen with Junie?”

“O-oh, n-no, I, um, I just – no, you see-” Coherency apparently was a skill that had now left you entirely. An efficient enough lie couldn’t be conjured up and you were stuck as a stuttering mess.

Cam was giggling into her mug over on the cough, smartly pressing her lips together and keeping her comments to herself.  You threw her a glare, but stayed quiet, knowing that whatever biting remark you could come up with would just come out choppy and useless.

“Did he kiss you?” Gemma asked excitedly.

Chewing on your bottom lip, you shook your head. “No. But he almost did.”

Your admission cause Cam to accidentally swallow her drink down the wrong pipe, throwing her into a coughing fit. When she was finally able to breathe again, she screeched, “What do you mean he ‘almost did’?”

You started fidgeting with your fingernails, absentmindedly digging out the nonexistent dirt from underneath them. “Well, he was leaning in, but then a couple walking their dog came by, so he pulled back.”

Gemma and Cam gave you identical dumbfounded looks. It was actually quite comical, but you were able to hold back the chuckle building in your throat.

“So, basically, what you’re saying is that he didn’t want to be seen kissing you? Like he was embarrassed?” Cam inferred with a particularly curtly tone. She even slammed her mug down on the side table for emphasis.

You wanted to argue that that wasn’t the case. At least, you were pretty sure that wasn’t the case. They didn’t know that “Junie” was actually your professor and if he’d been seen kissing a student by the wrong person, he’d be in boiling hot water. And even if you were brave enough to confess that little secret to Gemma and Cam, you couldn’t be entirely sure how they’d take it. Cam might smirk at the sneakiness and forbidden aspects of it all, but you could only guess how Gemma would take it. You’d didn’t think she’d exactly be jumping up and down with excitement.

“I don’t think he was embarrassed,” you said meekly. “I think it was just the surprise at the couple’s presence. We were at the park and there wasn’t anyone else there at first.”

“Hm,” Cam pursed her lips, giving you the feeling that she didn’t entirely believe it. “Okay.” She narrowed her eyes at you. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. I was just a little flustered, that’s all. I wasn’t expecting it.”

Gemma patted your head gently. “Okay. Just let us know if you need us to kick his .”

That truly managed to make you laugh. While you could see Cam really trying to throw a punch at Junmyeon’s face, you couldn’t imagine for a second the gentle Gemma trying anything to physically harm him. She’d probably instead start lecturing him on the possible psychological damage his actions could have caused you. That was much more her style.

“Thank you,” you smiled at your friends. “But I’m okay. I promise. He’s not going to do anything.”

You actually believed that last sentence. What happened back at the park was probably just a fluke, brought on by the heavy subject the two of you were engaged in. Junmyeon probably didn’t actually want to kiss you because he liked you in that way. He had a mate to find, remember? It was easy to get caught up in the moment. That couple was actually your saving grace, keeping the two of you from doing something you would regret. Yes, that was it.

At least, that’s what you would keep telling yourself.

**

Junmyeon was anticipating seeing you in class today. He wanted to see you again. He wanted to see if he could get you to agree to meet up with him, maybe take you for a run in his wolf form. You’d turned him down last time, but maybe he could persuade you.

Just a little bit of alone time, that’s all he was asking for. A place where you wouldn’t be interrupted, where he wouldn’t be scared of being seen by the wrong person. A place where he could build up the courage to try and kiss you again.

Maybe his plans were getting too elaborate.

He was sure he was getting close to being able to tell you everything. Hearing the way your heart was beating as he leaned in last night was a beautiful melody that he would never get tired of listening to for the rest of his life. And you would have let him kiss your lips. That was the strike that lit up his little match of hope after you’d been pulling away from him.

There was a lightness in Junmyeon’s steps as he headed towards the classroom. Sure, he was an idiot, but wasn’t everyone a fool in love?

Yeah, he could definitely say he was falling in love you. He felt elated when he could make you smile. He loved watching that sparkle in your eye when you were mesmerized by his family’s artifacts. The way you would clam up when you were flustered or the way you could read into the cultural significance of the fairytales he was lecturing on. You paid attention and listened to him on a level that he wasn’t used to. He wanted to get to know every single facet of who you were and fall deeper in.

You were already there when Junmyeon walked into the classroom. He nearly exploded when he saw that you were back in your front row seat, materials out and ready to start the period. No one else was around you and the other students that were scattered among the room were too busy talking to each other or scrolling through their phones to pay too much attention.

As calmly as he could, he walked up to you, earning your curious gaze when he reached the long, curved table where you sat.

“Can I see you after class?” he whispered. When you nodded, he simply smiled before walking back to his desk.

He was practically bouncing with anticipation throughout the whole lecture. It was a stupid thing to be excited about, but he couldn’t help it. Part of him always expected to be rejected whenever he asked you about staying back or meeting up with him. But you never told him no once he was finally able to ask. You would avoid him at times, not giving him the chance to say one word, but hopefully those times were behind him.

As class came to an end, you continued to just sit there in your seat as all the other students filed out. Junmyeon busied himself at his desk, pretending to go over lecture notes and piling up the quizzes he’d collected at the beginning of the hour.

“You wanted to see me?”

With his back still to you, Junmyeon smiled widely. Your voice was quiet and unsure and he couldn’t help but find it adorable. Turning around after he was able to get his face under control, he started, “I was, um-” he cleared his throat. Smooth, Junmyeon. “I was just wondering if you had any plans Friday afternoon.”

You frowned guiltily. “Well, yeah, actually I do. Midterms are next week, so I’ll be spending the weekend studying. I have a big test on Monday.”

Junmyeon deflated. He’d completely forgotten about that crucial part of the semester, second only to finals. “Oh, right. Hm.” Racking is brain, he tried to come up with some sort of solution. The next meeting outside of the classroom would have to be on your terms. “May I see your phone?”

“M-my phone?” you stammered.

He chuckled. “Yes. The cellular device you used to talk and text.”

By the look on your face, you didn’t entirely appreciate his comment, but you fished your phone out from your back pocket, unlocking it before handing it over. Junmyeon quickly added in his contact information before giving it back to you.

“There,” he sighed. “Now if you find yourself a little bored or needing a break from studying, you can get ahold of me. I’ll be free all weekend, if you change your mind.”

Your eyes were wide, filled with innocent surprise. “Okay…. I’ll, um, let you know. I should head to my next class now.”

“Of course.” Junmyeon watched as you hurriedly ran up the steps, tripping only once as you dashed away. The chuckle bubbling up in his chest couldn’t be held back anymore as he piled the papers scattered on the desk together and left the lecture hall.

Since he didn’t have another class until later in the afternoon, he headed back to his office to get started on grading the ever growing pile of quizzes that he’d been putting off. It took him a good hour and a half to get through the multiple classes’ worth of grading and plug the results into the school’s site. His eyes were beginning to glaze over and he was already looking forward to when he could head home.

Knock, knock, knock.

Junmyeon perked up at the sound. Did you, perhaps, change your mind to come see him?

“Come in,” he called out, hurrying to clear out the papers from his desk.

But it wasn’t you that slowly walked through the door.

It was Soomi.

Standing up from his desk, Junmyeon rushed over to the door, glancing up and down the hallway to make sure it was empty from any nosy gossipers before closing the door and turning back around.

“Soomi, I told you-”

She put up a hand to stop him. “I’m not here for that. I’m here on business.”

“Business?” Junmyeon frowned. He walked back to his desk, sitting down taking off his glasses. “What do you mean?”

Soomi didn’t sit down, opting instead to keep standing, arms folded across her stomach. She sighed. “Nia had a vision.”

Junmyeon couldn’t understand what was so important about those four little words. “Who’s Nia?”

“She’s my trainee,” Soomi explained. “She’s one of the few among the witches that can receive visions without casting a spell.”

“They just come to her?” Junmyeon didn’t like where this conversation was headed.

“Yes,” Soomi confirmed. “Poor thing still isn’t able to completely handle them when they come on nor be able to control them. We’re working with her on them, but it’s still touch and go.”

Junmyeon nodded sympathetically. “And what did Nia see?”

“Something is coming.” The way Soomi lowered her voice and stared at Junmyeon made the hair on his arms stand up.

“What’s coming?”

Soomi shook her head. “Nia couldn’t see. It all came in flashes, she said. She couldn’t get a clear grasp on what she was seeing. But there was strong emotion with it. Fear, terror, the need to protect. She collapsed after it was over, the vision was so forceful. Something is coming for the pack and you must be prepared.”

There wasn’t anything Junmyeon could really say. A vague notion didn’t give them a good foundation on how to proceed. Until there was more information, there was very little they could do to prepare.

“I appreciate the warning,” Junmyeon sighed. “I’ll talk to the boys. I’m sure it won’t be anything that we can’t handle. We did take out a pack of hybrids.”

Soomi kept her gaze down, her lips as if she were trying to get the words she was holding back to slip out. She rounded the desk, carefully hopping up to sit on the now cleared table top. Taking Junmyeon’s hand in both of hers, she stayed quiet.

Junmyeon wanted to pull away, to tell Soomi to please get off his desk, but the gentleman in him just couldn’t find a nice way to say it. He’d instead let you say your piece and leave.

“Junmyeon,” she whispered, “I know you’ve found your mate, but that doesn’t mean my feelings for you just go away. I don’t want anything happen to you.”

“I appreciate that, Soomi.” Out of politeness, he squeezed her hand, before starting to pull away, “But, I think-”

“Junmyeon- oh.”

.

**

Why did it have to be you?

Why did you have to make stupid decisions? Let yourself hope on useless things?

It had seem at like a good idea at the time. Yes, Junmyeon had give you his number, but it felt a little silly to text or call when you could just… see him.

So, after your second class of the day, you headed off to the professor’s building, telling yourself that if he wasn’t there then you would text him. You were sure you could carve out the time to spend a little of Saturday afternoon with whatever he’d had in mind. At first, you’d thought that maybe you’d see if Saturday morning would work, but you knew that if you did block out the morning from him, you’d be too tempted to spend the entire day with him.

When you reached Junmyeon’s office, you hadn’t been thinking that he might not be alone. The sign outside his door didn’t indicate he was with another student so, like an idiot, you just opened the door. And your heart didn’t just sink.

It cracked into a million pieces you didn’t believe would ever be put back together again.

Soomi was sitting on Junmyeon’s desk, holding his hand while looking down at him with that look you knew all too well.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled. “I should have knocked.”

Junmyeon jumped up from his seat. “No, (y/n), wait-”

You didn’t stick around to hear whatever explanation he’d felt the urge to give you. You didn’t need one. It was none of your business and you needed to get out of there before either of them saw you break.

Once out of the building, you didn’t stop running. Only when you reached the crosswalk off of school grounds were you finally forced to stop. Bouncing on the balls of your feet, you wanted to just sprint out into the street to get to the other side, in case someone actually decided to come after you. The chances of that happening were slim to none, but you let the thought linger anyway.

Safe inside your apartment, you threw yourself down on your bed and let the tears flow free.

For the next several days, you just stayed there in bed. Not even the urgency of midterms could coax you out of your room and onto campus grounds. You only crawled out of bed when your roommates were gone to use the bathroom and grab snacks so you didn’t starve to death. Other than that, you simply lied there and stared at the wall, playing the scene of Junmyeon and Soomi over and over. Your phone rang several times, but you never answered it or even bothered to look to see who it was. You had a pretty good inkling and you didn’t feel like talking to him.

“(y/n)?”

It was Friday night and Cam and Gemma had more than caught on to the fact that something was wrong. Both of them tiptoed into your room and sat as carefully as they could on the bed.

“Hey,” Gemma greeted softly. You barely peeked out from under your covers. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

You shook your head, too ashamed that you were falling into the same pattern of hopelessness that you’d experienced your freshman year, only this was a hundred times worse. Back then, you saw the light at the end of the tunnel, you just had to pick yourself up and walk towards it. This time you felt like you were lost in a cold, dark cave with no idea which way led out.

“We’re going to go to a party,” Cam informed you as she rubbed your leg in a motherly fashion over the covers. “I think you should go with us. Maybe take your mind off of whatever happened?”

“I don’t think a party is the solution,” you grumbled.

“Not a solution,” Gemma chimed in. “Simply a momentary distraction. Why not show the world that you’re strong and don’t let temporary setbacks or people who aren’t important keep you from living your life?”

With a huff, you flipped the covers off of your top half, letting you stare at your friends. “I’m not a huge supporter of drinking away your problems.”

Cam shook her head, “That’s not-”

Flinging up into a sitting position, you stopped her, “But, this one time, I can give into to the idea and live a little like a college student for one night.”

The grins that grew on your roommate’s face were scary and almost made you change your mind, but you couldn’t go back out now. You’d tried the wallowing around in bed doing nothing and that didn’t really work to ease your pain. So why not try the other extreme? You’d already had your heart broken. What was the worst that could happen?