You were grateful for Cam and Gemma. After your mini pity session, they didn’t push about “Junie” anymore. While you knew they were still riddled with curiosity, they didn’t try to worm anymore answers out of you. You weren’t sure you could handle that at this point. Every incident would be too perfect a mixture of the truth that made up your reality and the fantasies the unchecked part of your mind could come up with.

Part of you wished that he really was just “Junie”, a guy in your class who you could take long walks with, discuss the homework and plans after graduation with, someone who would take you for another ride on the back of his motorcycle without you panicking that the other students might recognize him. If only things could be that simple. Then you might actually consider changing your mind.

Letting out a groan that probably caught the attention of several other perusing students among the shelves in the library, you put your head down, using your hands as a pillow for your forehead. If anyone was staring you, at least they would just think you were struggling in a class or stuck on a transition sentence for your paper rather than the actual crisis you were facing.

You’d done very well this past week at keeping your distance from Junmyeon. In class, you sat a few rows back, closer to the middle rather than right up front. The first time you did that, Junmyeon had frowned at you, but then simply went on with his lecture for the day. If he ever wanted to speak to you after class, you didn’t give him the chance, making sure that you were in the first wave of students out the door before he could call after you.

The lack of contact between the two of you kept your mood at an all-time low, but it was a two way street. The fact that he didn’t purposefully seek you out just proved that you were probably right about him and that woman and you were just a nice little distraction or simply a friend for him to share the burden of his secret with. It was your lot in life, apparently. Didn’t mean you had to like it.

After another hour or so of struggling to concentrate on your homework, you gave up. Packing your study tools into your bag and double checking that you hadn’t left something important behind, you told yourself that as soon as you got home, you could take a nice long nap and shut out the real world for a little while. You left the table so some other poor student could take advantage of the late hours and free Wi-Fi and headed for the door.

Outside, the feeling of fall was starting to creep into the air. Only the very edges of the leave were starting to change in color, but it was still a noticeable change. A cool breeze caressed your cheek as if comforting and telling you that everything would be okay by winter. You really hoped that was true.

When you walked in through the door and into your apartment, you were relieved to see that you were alone. Dropping your bags off in your room, you quickly headed for the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water before lying down on the couch. You spent about fifteen minutes just scrolling endlessly through your phone, occasionally sipping on the water as you tried not to accidentally dowse yourself. Soon, you were yawning and you didn’t even try to fight off the urge to go to sleep. Flipping over to your side, you adjusted your head on the throw pillow and went to sleep.

It was a few hours later you woke up to Cam quietly trying to tiptoe through the living room towards her bedroom. You sat up, stretching out your stiff limps and letting out a high pitched moan.

“Hey,” you greeted groggily.

“Hey,” Cam greeted back guiltily. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

You waved it off. “It’s fine. I needed to get up anyway.”

Putting down her bag, she started shuffling through the fridge to find something to munch on. “Hey, by the way, I’m going to have a study session come over tonight. We’ve got a big test coming up that none of us are really prepared for.” Cam straightened up a little to look over the fridge door at you. “As long as that’s okay with you.”

You nodded as you hopped up off the couch. “That’s fine. I’ll just go to a shop so I’m out of the way.”

Cam rolled her eyes. “I’d remind you that you wouldn’t be in the way, but I know that if you stayed, you’d just be in your room the whole time freaking out about how there were a bunch of people that you don’t know sitting between you and the kitchen.”

“Am I really that predictable?” you asked with a pout.

“Yes,” Cam laughed, a little bit of sympathy sprinkled in with the teasing.

It was no use in arguing that you would have been perfectly fine staying in your room because Cam was absolutely right. You were too awkward and anxious and the idea of people turning around and staring at you every time you emerged from your room was already making you break out in a sweat.

Grabbing your bag you told her, “Just text me when you’re done!”

“Will do!”

Careful not to trip down the stairs, you eagerly left the apartment building, combing through the file cabinet in your head that held all your favorite coffee shops. The sun was already beginning to set so you decided on the closest one that sat just a few blocks down the street.

After ordering your favorite special that was thankfully still up on the chalkboard menu, you set up your laptop and pulled out a notebook to take over one of the tables close to an outlet. You didn’t actually plan on doing any homework; this would purely be a session of messing around on the internet and avoiding responsibilities for future you to take care of. 

Over the course of the next hour, you tortured yourself with online shopping that you would never actually follow through on and giggled over a few of your favorite musicians and their entertaining interviews. You were actually having a very good time in that little shop. It was the first time that you didn’t have to think about class or a specific professor or how messed up that part of your life was getting. For a little while, your mind focused on nonessential things, creating plenty of endorphins to keep your mood up.

Then it all came crashing down.

In the middle of watching a music video that you’d already seen a hundred times, Junmyeon came strolling into the shop. He didn’t seem to notice you – which was a good thing considering you probably looked ridiculous trying to duck behind your laptop screen. His eyes didn’t stray into your direction once as he approached the counter and ordered a coffee to go. You watched him as he paid for the coffee, waited for it to be made as his back stayed facing you, and then breathed again once he exited the shop.

Straightening up, your good mood was now shattered. For about five minutes, you just sat there, staring at nothing. You were currently mulling in two conflicting moods: on one hand, you were a little relieved that he didn’t come over to you, but on the other…. Did he really not see you at all? Were you really that invisible?

Frustrated, you slammed your laptop shut, creating a loud slam that definitely caught the attention of the barista and a few other patrons scattered around the room. You packed up your notebook and headed out the door in a hurry. It wasn’t quite safe to go home yet, but you needed to get out of the shop. Maybe you could just walk around and burn off some of this pent up energy. With determine steps, you waltzed out of the shop and onto the sidewalk surrounded by the night air.

“Why are you avoiding me?”

You nearly jumped out of your skin at the unexpected question. Whirling around, your eyes widened at the sight of Junmyeon leaning against the wall, sipping on his coffee while he waited for your answer. When you didn’t speak, he tossed the coffee into the trash can just outside the door and stalked up to you. With a raised eyebrow, he said, “Well?”

You gulped. With that smolder that he may or may not be knowingly giving you, you knew one thing for sure: you were in major trouble.

**

Junmyeon couldn’t understand for the life him why you were avoiding him. Yes, there had been a small misunderstand with Soomi from what he gathered, but he didn’t think that it entailed blowing him off. The few times he’d tried to track you down after class, you’d disappeared like smoke in the air. You were too quick for him, which was saying a lot considering he was gifted in above human speed.

It was by pure luck that he decided to wander along the city streets after staying late to grade the latest quizzes he’d given out the day before and just so happen to walk by the very coffee shop that you were currently patronizing. He stood there, looking in through the window for a minute or two, debating with himself on whether or not to go inside and talk to you. Perhaps cornering you would be a bit unfair. In the end, he compromised with himself, deciding that he would go in, order a cup of coffee, and just see what your reaction to his presence would be.

At this point, he really shouldn’t have expected anything different.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw you duck behind your laptop screen. He sighed internally. Why did you feel the need to hide from him like this? He wished he could rewind time and make it so he drove a little slower or took more time at the museum so the two of you missed Soomi. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel the need to keep such a large distance from him.

With stooped shoulders, he took the beverage he didn’t even really want and left. But he wasn’t giving up that easy. 

He gave himself ten minutes. Ten minutes to lean against this wall and sip on the coffee, waiting to see if you’d leave the shop. If you didn’t come out of the door within that time frame, then he’d walk away and try to talk to you tomorrow instead.

You came out in five.

It was hard to keep his smirk down when you walked right past him. “Why are you avoiding me?”

At the sound of his voice, you jumped several inches off the ground, even letting out a barely audible squeak. Spinning on the balls of your feet, you turned to face him, eyes huge in horror that you’d been caught.

When you stayed silent, Junmyeon took one last sip of the coffee before tossing it in the nearby trash can. His predatory wolf was gaining traction in the control area, causing him to walk up to you and raised an eyebrow as he asked, “Well?”

You swallowed nervously before lying, “I haven’t been avoiding you.”

Junmyeon sighed, taking one step back to give you a little room and hopefully let your system calm down. Your own reaction was bombarding all of his senses; your heart racing in his ears, your scent attacking his nose, the itch to feel your skin against his fingertips. He wanted to just pull you in, but he pushed himself away.

“It certainly feels like it,” he mumbled, taking his eyes off of you to stare down at the ground.

“Professor, I-”

Junmyeon’s head snapped up. “Why are you calling me ‘Professor’ again?”

“Because you are my professor,” you replied, your voice quieter than a mouse and not very strong behind your argument.

“Well, I’ve asked you to call me Junmyeon when we’re outside of class,” he scolded. It was frustrating how you were trying to put this wall up when he’d already worked so hard to tear half of it down. “Shouldn’t you respect my wishes in this instance?”

You blew air out between your lips in a cute, pouty fashion.

“You’re right,” you sighed. “I’m sorry. And… you’re right. I have… sort of been avoiding you….”

He was happy that you were being honest with him, but, “Why?”

It was silent as you chewed on your bottom lip, mulling over your answer. “Well… you see… my friend saw us driving off together.”

“Oh.” Junmyeon frowned, getting worried. This could be bad. “So, they knew it was me?”

You shook your head frantically. “No! I- I may… have lied to my friends and said that I was secretly dating the guy on the motorcycle and that his name was Junie.”

Don’t smile, Junmyeon. Don’t smile.

It was a struggle to hold back the grin that he so desperately wanted to let spread across his face. “But I’m the guy on the motorcycle.”

You stared at him like he’d just offered to tap dance right there in the street. “Yeah. I know.”

The grin was starting to crack through in the corners of his mouth. “You could call me Junie.”

“No,” you deadpanned. Without warning, you started heading down the sidewalk.

“Hold on!” Junmyeon brought you to a stop with a gentle grip on your forearm. At least, he hoped it was gentle. When you turned to look at him, you didn’t seem like you were in pain or hurting.

“What?” But you were definitely annoyed.

“Let me walk you home,” he offered. “It’s not safe after dark.”

“I’m not going home,” you informed him with crossed arms. “One of my roommates is having a study group over and I prefer not to be there when there are people I don’t know in the living room.”

Junmyoen couldn’t fight the laugh that pushed itself out of his throat. Somehow, you could stare down a werewolf with no problems, but were terrified of strangers. “Still, you shouldn’t wander around this time of night. Where are you headed? I’ll at least walk you there.”

You just shrugged. “I don’t exactly know where I’m going from here.”

Junmyeon sighed. Of course you were just headed in a nondescript direction. Looking around, he suggested, “Why don’t we go over to the park for a little while? Would that be okay?”

For a second you hesitated, glancing around as if someone might jump out and spot the two of you. Finally, you sighed, “Alright. I don’t have anything else to do.”

He let that comment slide off of his shoulders. Something beyond lying to your friends about who it was on the motorcycle was causing you to act this way towards him. It was obvious that you were still bothered by something with Soomi and you were just refusing to tell him. As much as he wanted to push and get the answer out of you so he could firmly deny it for your own ears to hear, he knew that pressing the issue would just make you run away more.

There were no words exchanged between the two of you as he guided you across the street and to the little park that sat near the university. There wasn’t much to the plot of land beside an open grass field about a block long and lots of trees and benches that decorated a path to walk or jog along. There was only one jungle gym and swing set for the children a small pond for ducks to call home.

Junmyeon led you to the path, where the two of you continued to walk silently, glancing around every so often but never making eye contact with each other. He offered at one point to carry your bag for you, but you simply refused, claiming that – while it was carrying a laptop, charger, and a notebook among other things – it wasn’t very heavy.  The two of you came to a more secluded part of the path, where a bench was surrounded by bushes and trees and signs to hide the occupiers from other park goers unless they passed right in front of the sitting area. Taking advantage of the opportunity, Junmyeon suggested that the two of you rest on the bench and this offer you gladly accept, much to his relief.

“(y/n)?” he finally spoke up, gaining your attention as you looked over at him.

“Yes?”

Junmyeon allowed himself a little half smile. “Thank you.”

You furrowed your eyebrows, confused at his sudden show of gratitude. “For what?”

“For not running away.” He meant it for right in this moment, but from the way you were nodding, you were taking it for a different meaning.

“You’re not scary,” you giggled. “There’s nothing wrong with being different. Besides, I went looking for you in the woods that night anyway. It’d be a little counterintuitive if I had ran away.”

“That is true,” Junmyeon chuckled. He was thankful that you had decided to venture out into the woods that night in search of him. It made part one of this whole process a lot easier. But it seemed, in order to make up for the earlier ease, part two had to be twice as hard.

He wanted to just let everything out. He wanted you to know everything little feeling that was brewing up inside of him and hope that you’d accept him. But the words just wouldn’t come out. There was something that was holding him back and he couldn’t figure out what it was. Maybe there was another to let you know how he felt without outright saying it.

“Junmyeon?”

The sound of his name pulled him out of his head, bringing his focus back to the present. “Yes?”

“Am I just another a person to you?” The concern and doubt in your eyes nearly felt like a stab of wolfsbane to his heart.

“(y/n), you are one of the most precious human beings on this planet to me,” he answered honestly. Well, mostly honest. You were in fact the most important person to him in the world. “If I’ve done anything to make you doubt that, then I’m sorry. I’m so grateful that you found me in the woods and that I don’t have to hide from you. That’s a rare gift for someone like me.”

Your eyes were starting to gloss over and you even let out a small sniff as you smiled up at him. “Thank you for telling me that. I’m sorry, I just needed a little bit of reassurance.”

Why you needed to be reassured, he couldn’t fathom, but he would make sure that you didn’t need to doubt it ever again. He let his hand fall on top of your head, sort of patting it in a comforting motion.

But then he froze. Your eyes were staying on his face, occasionally flickering down to the area where his mouth resided. The wolf was egging him on, urging him to lean forward and find out how you tasted. And he was listening to it.

You didn’t put up a hand to stop him as the space between you two shrank. A tiny little voice in the back of Junmyeon’s head told him that he shouldn’t be doing this, not yet, but your heart was accelerating at his closeness, the pheromone scent drifting off of you telling him that this was more than okay. That you wanted this, too.

He rested his forehead against yours, closing his eyes as you did the same. He was so close, only a little more-

Crunch.

Junmyeon snapped back as his ears picked up the approaching steps. The look of disappointment that you were trying to hide was killing him. He wanted to apologize, maybe go ahead and steal that kiss anyway, but he held himself back. The two of you sat there awkwardly as another couple walked by with their small terrier leading the way. They both waved, being friendly, but only Junmyeon waved back. Your phone chimed and you kept your focus on that.

“It’s Cam,” you told him. “Her study group is gone. I’m going to head back now.” You stood up and Junmyeon jumped to his feet before you could disappear.

“Let me walk you home,” he insisted. Just as you opened your mouth to protest, he added, “At least to the end of the block. Just so I know you got home safe.”

You sighed. “Okay. That should be fine.”

It seemed that silence would be a constant third wheel for the time being. You didn’t speak to him until you reached the corner of your apartment building.

“Thank you for walking me home,” you whispered. “I’ll see you in class.”

“Good night, (y/n),” Junmyeon replied just as quietly. He watched as you headed for the front entrance and then disappeared into the apartment complex.

It was a lonely stroll back to the university and back to his car where he would head back to the farmhouse and probably to a chaotic pack. He was still kicking himself and praying that he didn’t shove himself back several paces when he’d made just a few inches of progress. It was like he was self-sabotaging and he couldn’t figure out how to stop.

Once in the car, Junmyeon groaned and laid his forehead against the steering wheel.

What. An. Idiot.