OST: With You by B.A.P

2016

Sometimes, there is no other choice but deciding to do the unthinkable.

That was what Irene had in her head that fateful night- no, early morning, in 2016.

Joy had her last filming of WGM that day. It was 3 AM then at Red Velvet’s dorm. But she hadn’t stopped crying! She really hadn’t!

All her unnies already tried calming her down, hugging her, giving her water, ice cream and chocolates. Yet nothing worked.

While Joy was at this state, no one could sleep. They were all getting increasingly worried, thinking she would be sick if this went on.

Irene had been pacing in the dining room for a while by then, as Seugi and Wendy sat on the couch looking at her. They all looked really exhausted. Yeri was in the bedroom with Joy, still trying to calm her.

“Will you stop pacing around, you’re making me dizzy” Wendy protested, holding her head.

“I guess there’s no other way” Irene declared, reaching for her phone and taking a deep breath, then calling her manager.

After her manager picked up, she instantly said, “Give me Yook Sungjae's number. This is urgent.”

Seulgi and Wendy sat ramrod straight when they heard it.

“Unnie, you’re calling Yook Sungjae?” Seulgi asked in terror.

“Ne. I think there’s no other way. I don’t want Sooyoung to be sick.”

Irene set her phone on speaker mode and dialled the guy.

He wasn’t picking up.

“Maybe he’s already sleeping?” Wendy suggested.

“Aish, how can he be sleeping when uri Sooyoungie is so sad? I’m going to—“

“Yeoboseyo. Who is this?”

The three girls were shocked because he answered it.

“Oh. Yook Sung Jae-ssi. This is Irene.”

“Irene-nim???”

“Ne. I’m sorry for calling you in the middle of the night.”

“Ah, it’s ok. Is.....Is Sooyoung alright?”

Irene fisted her left hand and continued pacing.

“No, she’s not alright. She hasn’t stopped crying. Even until now.”

“What??? She’s still crying?”

Irene then shut her eyes. “I know this is a lot to ask. But could you please come here? Sooyoung is—she’s in a horrible state. We never saw her like this. We’re worried about her. Maybe you—“ Irene paused, then took a deep breath. I’d do anything for Sooyoung, she said inside her heart, including asking Yook Sungjae to come to our dorm in the middle of the night, if that's necessary.

“Can you please come to our dorm and calm her down?”

Sungjae was silent for a second. “C—can I do that?”

“Yes.”

“Is it alright to come to your dorm at this hour?”

“I’m the leader and I’m the one asking you. This is urgent. Please, can you come?”

“I’ll go. Just text me your address.”

“Ne. Manhi gamsahamnida. Drive safely.”

“I’ll go now, Irene-nim.”

**************************************************

Around twenty minutes later, Irene opened the front door for Sungjae.

He was wearing jeans and a black hoodie, looking as worried as possible.

He bowed in a hurry. Irene, Wendy and Seulgi returning it.

“Thank you for coming although it’s very late” Irene began.

“It’s alright. I can’t sleep as well.”

Seulgi and Wendy exchanged glances, somehow feeling glad that it’s not only Joy who was suffering on her own.

“We haven’t told her you’re coming.”

“Where is she?”

“Still in her bedroom. Yeri is with her, she’s been trying to help her, but Joy just kept on crying and crying. It’s as if someone she loved died. We really can’t bear seeing her like this.”

All along, Irene led Sungjae to the door of Yeri and Joy’s room.

“Is it alright if I come in?”

“Please help her. I’ll be grateful if you can—“

Sungjae already opened the door before Irene finished speaking.

Yeri was sitting on the bed, rubbing the huddled figure.

Yeri looked up when she heard the door opening, then she froze when she saw it was Sungjae, with her unnies behind him.

Joy was completely covering herself with the comforter.

Yeri got up from the bed and bowed to Sungjae. He nodded, before his eyes focused on the curling figure on the bed.

He could hear cracked sobs.

Irene pulled Yeri by the hand, and the girls left the room after closing the door.

Slowly, Sungjae walked then sat on the bed. He then carefully pulled the comforter.

What he saw then broke his heart.

Joy was curling on the bed in a fetal position, sobbing like she’d never feel happy, ever again.

“Aigoo, Sooyoung-ah, why are you crying so much?”

Joy stopped crying due to severe shock.

She turned and saw him sitting on the bed beside her.

“O—Oppa?”

Her face was wet with tears, and her eyes were swollen.

“Eyyy, you’re all swollen” he exclaimed, reaching for her cheeks to wipe her tears.

“W—why—am I dreaming?”

“Aniya. Irene-nim called me.”

“And you came just like that? Oppa, what time is this?”

“Almost 2.30, I guess.”

“Oppa, you shouldn’t come” she said weakly.

“How can I stay silent when you’re crying so much like this?”

She sat up, “Still, how could you come when it’s so late?”

“Yah, is that the problem here? It’s not the time to be concerned about me! Your face is all red and swollen from crying!”

“Mianhe.....”

“Why are you sorry? I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Sooyoung-ah, I didn’t know you were crying this sadly.”

She really still couldn’t believe the situation was real. Her virtual married couple, Yook Sungjae, was actually there, sitting on her bed, looking as if he would cry too.

“Stop crying, aigoo. I can’t stand it. Come here.”

Sungjae finally pulled Joy by the hand and she willingly collapsed into his arms.

Somehow, the nearness made her cried again.

“Aigoo..........” Sungjae cooed, holding her tight, then rubbing her back as if she was a crying baby. “Why are you crying this much? Didn’t you hear what I say earlier? I don’t want us to end, Sooyoung-ah.”

Joy choked and held him tighter, “But how? It will be so hard to even meet.......”

“Why would it be hard? I’ll visit you at least once a week.”

“Gotjimal..........”

“What???” he pulled her away to an arm’s length. “Why are you saying I’m lying?”

“You’re just saying it now but—“

“Yah, you don’t trust me?”

Joy then sat straight. Her hair was messy, her eyes were swollen and her cheeks damp.

This was the messiest Sungjae had ever seen her, but for him, she never looked prettier. He just found out she cried for hours because she was too sad, worried that they’d change. How could he not fall for her harder?

“Oppa, are you being sincere?”

“Park Soo Young, I’ve never been more sincere in my life” he promised solemnly.

“We can still see each other?”

“As long as you’ll let me, I won’t stop seeing you.”

“........what if we become too busy?”

“Being busy is a good thing. As long as two people want to, they can find a way.”

“........did you take any of the magic gummy bears before coming here?”

Sungjae froze for a second, before bursting into a loud laugh.

Hearing that, Irene said from outside the door, “I think she’s ok now.”

“Thank God” Wendy let out.

“Unnie, are you going to let them stay there?” Yeri asked.

Four pairs of eyes stared at Irene, their “mother”.

“I guess I will.”

“.......is it ok to trust Sungjae-ssi this much?” Wendy asked, worried.

“What are you talking about, he’s a good guy” Seulgi replied.

“Ne. Sungjae-ssi is a good guy. He won’t do anything over the line” Yeri stated. “I’ll just sleep with Unniedeul”

“Right. Aigoo.......I’m exhausted.”

The four members of Red Velvet then all filed to the other rooms, sure that Sungjae already got everything under control.

***************************************************

Meanwhile, in Joy’s room:

“How can you mention the magic gummy bears in this situation?”

“You—you’re acting too greasy.”

“I’m worried because of you! I’m only saying what’s necessary!”

“.........ahrasseo.”

“Ahrasseo? That’s the only thing you can say?”

“What else do you want me to say?”

“You can say “I’ll always love Oppa”.”

Joy cringed until she curled her hands.

“Ah, cham. I come to a girl’s place in the middle of the night like this—aigoo. This is all your fault.”

“I didn’t ask Oppa to come!”

“You’re the one who can’t stop crying!”

“But I was really sad!!!”

“Ahrasseo, ahrasseo. You’re not wrong for crying” Sungjae quickly said, his hands arranging her hair to look more presentable. “Aigoo, aegi-yah. You cried so much.”

“Ne, I cried so much. I’m tired.”

“Was it hard?” he asked in a baby voice.

“It was hard” Joy admitted.

“Have you eaten anything?”

She shook her head.

“Aigoo, were you that sad?”

Joy nodded forlornly.

“You were that sad to part with such an awesome guy?”

Her face turned annoyed in an instant.

“Ah, mwolla, I’m cooking ramyeon!”

“Ohhhhh, cook for me too!”

****************************************************

Five minutes later found Joy in Red Velvet’s dorm kitchen, cracking eggs to a big pot full of ramyeon, barefoot and in her pyjama, as Sungjae chopped vegetables and added them into the pot.

Soon they sat side by side at the dining table, eating ramyeon from the pot.

“Ahhh, this is really good!” Sungjae commented happily.

“I’m so hungry! Omo! Why am I so hungry?” Joy asked herself, taking another big helping of ramyeon and putting it in her small bowl.

“You didn’t eat anything, Silly. That’s why you’re starving.”

“Oh. Maja. Ah, I was crazy!”

Sungjae laughed. “Yah, you do realize you’re talking about yourself, right?”

“Ne. I was too much.”

He chuckled then patted her head fondly.

After that, only slurping sounds could be heard. Apparently not only Joy, but Sungjae was also starving.

***************************************************

“Will you cry again if I leave you?”

Joy looked at him and nodded.

“Aigoo, Sooyoungie. What should I do with you?”

“Just don’t leave me. That’s all you need to do.”

“You’re the one who shouldn’t leave me. Your fanboys are millions.”

“As if Oppa doesn’t have fangirls.”

They were lying on her bed under the comforter, and he was hugging her.

“Don’t smile to other guys.”

“..........I’m Red Velvet’s Joy. I need to smile to my fans.”

“Don’t wear y clothes.”

“...........I have to follow the concepts of my group.”

Sungjae sighed heavily.

“I’ll bear it.”

Joy laughed at that.

“I’ll also smile to other girls and be y.”

Joy elbowed his chest at that.

“Oppa, you can’t play with other girl group members.”

“There are so many pretty and young girl group members these days.......”

“Oppa” she warned in a scary tone.

Sungjae chuckled.

“Ahrasseo. I’ll only look at Joy Red Velvet.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Oppa?”

“Hm?”

“What if I have to act like I don’t know you?”

“........that will be hard. Do you have to?”

“I’m not sure yet. But all my sunbaedeul who are dating act like they’re single in public.”

“........ahrasseo.”

“Really?”

“As long as you’re with me, I can stand pretending to be strangers. As long as........in real life, you’re mine.”

Joy became quiet, then stared at her couple ring.

“I guess we can’t wear this anymore.”

She took it off, and Sungjae also slowly took off his ring.

“We don’t wear our rings anymore, but we become officially dating.”

“Oh. That sounds cool.”

“Be with me, ex wife.”

“Ne, I’ll be with you, ex husband.”

“Forever and ever?”

“Forever and ever” Joy promised.

“Good. Now, kiss me.”

“What???”

“Aren’t we dating? Then you can kiss me, right?”

“Why should I do it first?”

“You never mind doing anything first.”

“But how can I kiss you, first?”

“You can’t?”

“I definitely can’t!”

“Fine. Then I will.”

Joy didn’t really get it. One second he was lying beside her, another second, he was already on top of her.

He held his weight with his arms, but his eyes were different. He wasn’t the cute Sungjae at that moment. He was the all male Sungjae, and he knew what he wanted.

She wasn’t even thinking of how to act. She completely froze.

But it was different. She wasn’t standing on an amusement park with him, where she could move back as far as she needed to. And she was definitely not on a couch, she couldn’t fall to the floor even when she wanted to. She was on a bed, and he was on top of her, and she couldn’t escape anywhere.

Sungjae moved, and she could see his face zooming in closer. She could even feel his breath fanning her face.

And then he kissed her forehead.

She heaved a sigh of relief when he pulled away.

“What? Are you glad I just kissed your forehead?”

She smiled and nodded.

“But I’m not stopping there” he announced.

“What? Op—“

He bent down and kissed both her cheeks, very gently.

“Sooyoungie” he called.

Her eyes flew opened. “You’re very pretty. Aigoo. How can a girl be as pretty as you?”

She wanted to say he’s being unusually cheesy, but her voice died in .

“Thank you for today. I think you’ve shown me how much you love me by crying so much.”

“I’m sorry, I’m so bad in expressing myself. I love you though, you know that, right?”

She nodded at that, somehow her tears started to fall again.

Sungjae caught all her tears with his thumbs.

“And don’t worry, Oppa will never leave you.”

With that, Sungjae bent down and gave Joy her first kiss.

Joy had lots of worries about it. But in retrospect, it was as easy as breathing. She was glad, he was leading, as he held her face and gave her sweet pecks on her lips. His lips were warm and gentle. It wasn’t scary. It was Sungjae Oppa, afterall.

Seconds later, she hugged his neck and he lied fully on top of her.

He gave everything he got and kissed her with all the pent-up longing he felt. The frustration of hanging between reel and real, all the emotions he felt for her, and finally the relief of knowing he had her heart completely after all.

After he pulled away, he lied beside her and hugged her, as she leant on her chest.

“Go to sleep. I’ll be here until you sleep.”

“........then I’ll never sleep.”

“You have work tomorrow. Be a good girl. Sleep, now. I might not be here when you wake up, but as soon as you text me, I’ll call you. If I can’t call you, it’s just because I’m busy, but I’ll always call and text you when I can.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Ahrasseo.”

“Oppa?”

“Hm?”

“Sing for me.”

“Aigoo. What are you, a real baby?”

“Ne.”

“What should I sing?”

“Anything.”

“Ok, I’ll sing Rising Sun.”

She slapped his stomach.

“Yah! Are you hitting me?”

“You’re unbelievable!”

“I can’t sing Rising Sun?”

“No. Sing me something sweet.”

“Shall I sing our song?”

“Ok.”

He then began singing their song, Young Love, holding her.

She fell asleep after he finished the chorus.

“Park Sooyoung, you’re a real baby” he declared, rubbing her back gently. “But what can I do, I love you because of it.”

Sungjae stayed for sometime more, before he slowly got up from her bed.

Leaving her room, he then slowly walked to the front door.

When he let himself out, he leant his forehead on the door. A half of him didn’t really want to leave.

But he had to. He also needed to work the next day.

And he was telling the truth. He was determined to never let her go.

*************************************************

Author’s Note:

I was really sick two weeks ago. And I’m also disgusted with what’s happening in Kpop right now. One day, I saw on twitter somebody posting a clip of BtoB members turning their backs as Red Velvet members climbed into a bus. I thought, “Oh God, such kind Kpop male singers! So guys like them really do exist in Kpop?”.

Forgive me, with everything’s going on, I was losing my respects to Kpop guys. I know I’m generalizing everything, but I guess I was really feeling down.

That clip made me watched Sungjoy’s WGM.

I’ve always been a fan of Yongseo couple, and I’m still shipping them until now.

Sungjoy are not Yongseo, but they were sweet and cute in their own ways.

I really like their youth and sincerity.

Joy was really pretty and caring, also she’s as cute as a baby. I feel that she can be really brave with Sungjae because he makes her feel comfortable.

Sungjae was really shy at first, before changing to a relentless prankster. Sometimes he frustrates me, but then I found out that he’s been that cheeky only with Joy. In other variety shows, he’s always the sweet and cute Sungjae. But with Joy, he so much.

He’s also really cute and sincere all along. There were a lot of times when he was like a baby as well, but he could also explode with manliness.

From all the episodes, I really love when he visited RV’s practice room and ran to hug Joy. Also the scene when they were washing the towels in the narrow bathroom. He’s y when he’s all bold and daring, but it’s the way he looked at her on that scene that melted me.

I’ve always like RV, but my bias had never been Joy, so I don’t know much about her. I also only knew Sungjae from Goblin and knew barely anything about him.

But for sure, from now on, I’ll follow them loyally.

May Sungjae be together in real life. I ship them. They’re so lovely and great with each other.

And I’ll definitely write more about them.

Thank you for reading, see you next time.