It was a very busy month for them all. Though they have finish their promotion, they barely get a time to see each other. Sooyoung, Yoona, Seohyun is so busy with filming. Yuri is in process to recover after she injured her leg. Sunny get a bunch of invitation to do a variety show. Taeyeon and Hyoyeon is busy with their own things. Tiffany get an opportunity to learn acting, so she was far away from them all. And after i got some issue with SM, i bring myself to stand on my own. Making my own albums, manage my company and of course i make a time to spend with my sister. But truthly speaking, i really miss them all. Was it funny if i said i miss Taeyeon's nagging, Fany's loud voice, Sunny's aegyo, Hyoyeon's bluntness, Yuri's kabbness, Sooyoung's habit which is eating, Yoona's chodingness and maknae's clinging? All this time, never been missing one day to think about all of them. Though it's been almost 4 years, the memories is still there. I'm trying hard to get rid the memory but it seem that is already in the respective place.

I still remember our time when we get to practice all over the night and we just get like 2 or 3 hours to sleep. When we wake up, we have to get into the routine all over again until we get into the stage. It was very tiring and we always think to give up but we get thru that when we face it together. We admit sometimes we get into fights but we always make it up because we couldn't stand to mad to each other for very long time. I miss my girls, will they still want to see me as their family or just a stranger? I really want to meet them but how and where to start?

"Unnie, are you alright?". I was snapped from my thought with a slight tap at my shoulder. I give my sister a smile and gesture her to sit beside me which she gladly did.

"Yes of course i am Soojung, why?".

"Well, i was calling for you and didn't get any response. So, i thought you must think about something serious. Am i right?". As Soojung said that, i sigh deeply.

"Soojung, i really miss them.....so much. I thought about meeting them but i was afraid".

"And may i know why?".

"Though it was our company mistake, i couldn't help but blame myself. I know i suppose to be more brave and stood with my decision to stay but everything was in mess that time. Our dream to perform at Tokyo Dome as 9 was just a dream to me. I fail to defend myself and i just walk toward the front door without looking back though the girls keep calling for me. And you know what happen next right?". I caress Soojung head as she lay on my lap.

"Unnie, i know how you feel and i was there when it happen. But unnie, i'm sorry to said. Isn't that was Taeyeon unnie's fault? I mean, she suppose to be there for you and defending you because she was the leader after all but i don't see her effort to get you back to the group", she express herself and i chukle at her.

"Soojung, let me show you something". Soojung get up form my lap and i walk toward my closet and take an old box. 

"Before you blame any of the girls, look at this box first". And without a second thought, she walk toward me and start to look at it and i just play with my phone. I scroll my gallery and smile slightly when i see the picture of them. When will i meet all of you girls? After a while, Soojung look at me and she was nearly crying. I pat her head and she burst into tears.

"Unnie, why you never told me about it? The letters, the postcards, the presents, the simple note and everything that coming from all of them. You just let me released my anger to the unnies for years but never once you blame them after what happen. Did you reply any of their letters?". I just shake my head and release a deep sigh.

"Thats why i'm afraid Soojung-ah. It's not like i forget any of them but i don't even know how to face and speak with them anymore. What should i do?".

"Sica unnie, you know them very w