Their start in the survival show was far from pretty. Being an already debuted idol did not make it easier, instead, the pressure and expectations drove the members into a rocky and bumpy road. Due to a poor song selection, they could not show their potentials in both singing and dancing, resulting in the four of them being placed in low ranks. More than their ranks, Minhyun was more worried of Baekho. His playful and smiling boyfriend was gone, replaced by a serious man with a stressed out expression on his face. Seeing his boyfriend's condition made Minhyun's heart filled with sorrow since he was unable to comfort nor lessen the older's pain.

Minhyun could feel Baekho's distress clearly. After all, he had been together with the older for more than 8 years. He could also see JR and Ren's struggle to survive and maintain their relationship. The youngest could not adjust to the show well at the start, and the leader could not help the youngest much without making it too obvious. Although it was hard for him, Minhyun had to keep his ground, creating a stable foundation for the team to survive. He needed to be strong and endure the hardships for his team's future. After the first rank placement, he was placed in C by himself while the others were in D. In his opinion, they deserved better, since some of the contestants who performed worse than them were placed in higher rank. But he also understood the role of expectations that they should have performed better since they had the experience.

During the first week, Minhyun tried his best to focus his mind on practicing, hiding his personal issues deep inside his heart. But then, seeing s' suffering, especially Baekho's, made him lost his focus. He felt really guilty when he could not perform well on the reevaluation. On the bright side, he was placed in the same rank with Baekho. Things got harder when he was together with his lover. Their desire to hold each other was too strong to resist. Not being able to see his lover was a torment, but being able to see the older without the ability to show their affection was worse. People already cursed on them for appearing and not performing well, Minhyun could not make things worse by revealing his relationship with Baekho. The longing in Baekho's eyes stabbed Minhyun deeply, crushing his heart.

One night, he could not repress his feelings anymore. He was really on the verge of breaking down due to the constant exhaustion and pressure. His patience was wearing thin and he could not wait any longer until they return to their dorm. After the other contestants were asleep, Minhyun searched for Baekho, signaling him to go inside the bathroon where there was no camera. He went inside first, waiting until the door was opened and a man entered the small cubicle. Baekho closed the door behind him, turning the lock so that no one else could get in. Baekho slowly approached his boyfriend who was sitting with his head between his knees.

"Hey, are you okay?" Baekho carefully asked the younger. He knew that Minhyun must have had his reason for taking this risk instead of waiting for their break in three days.

"I'm so tired Baekho-yah. Our first performance is in front of our eyes but I feel like I'm giving up." Minhyun looked at Baekho sadly, his face full of exhaustion. He did not even have the strength to stand and hug the older like what he usually did whenever they saw each other. Baekho came closer to the younger, patting him on the back.

"I know. You've been doing great. But I can't let you stop fighting now, Minhyun-ah. We need to do our best no matter how hard it is. Think of Aron hyung, JR-ie, and Minki who are also trying their best to protect our team. Think of Nu'est, our second family and home. Think of me. We need you, Minhyun-ah. That's why you can't give up now." Baekho took Minhyun's hand, reminding him of the reasons they were all fighting in this hellish place. Baekho was also tired. He believed that everyone there must be tired. He had caught some trainees crying about how hard the program was, and he always tried his best to console them although they were competing with each other.

"I know that I've promised you before that I will never give up. That anything can not be as bad as Nu'est's disbandment. But now that we're really here, it's really hard. We can not show our talents, our ranks keep dropping, and we're getting more hate lately." Minhyun's voice was about to crack. He did not cry, he was too tired to, but inside he was crying. Except for JR, they did not do well on the reevaluation. Minhyun started to think that maybe this was the end, that they better go their separate ways.

"Hey, we still have more performances to go. More chances to prove ourselves. We can still make it. But we need to focus." Baekho said softly. He also had been unable to put his mind entirely on the competition as he kept thinking about the negative possibilities and his past regrets. He realized that he needed to concentrate on the present as thinking about the past and future would not help him win this challenge.

"You're right. All of us are having it hard. I can't just whine and give up that easily." Minhyun started to smile weakly, staring warmly at his source of strength. "You'll always be there with me, won't you?"

"Always." Baekho smiled back to the younger. "Do you want to sleep now? Or do you want to spend the rest of this night in a toilet?" Baekho laughed at his own joke. Minhyun chuckled at the older's low sense of humor and left the room, embracing the next day with new determination.

Things started to go well after the group evaluation. Minhyun got the chance to form an ultimate team, earning himself the nickname of CEO Hwang. He always had a good eye for talent, and he took the chance to use his ability. Of course he wanted to take all of s, but he knew that doing that would make them getting cursed at. At the end, he only chose JR since he needed a rapper and a leader for his team. JR took the spotlight after being his team's leader, his selflessness and caring attitude made people respected him and calling him Nation's Leader. Baekho captured the audience with his y manly charm, the same charm that made Minhyun fall for the y bandit. Ren also performed very well, his beauty fitted well with his group's concept.

He also got to know the other trainees, most of them younger than he was. Since almost all the members of Nu'est were the same age, he had no experience of caring for someone younger than him. The trainees he met were like little brothers for him. All of the other members also seemed to get close to the other trainees. Kwon Hyunbin was especially close to him and JR. They spent a lot of times together that Hyunbin even got to know Ren and Baekho. By chance, he was placed in the same team with Hyunbin again during position evaluation. He cared a lot about Hyunbin, but never in the romantic way. However, he liked to do some skinship with Hyunbin to tease his boyfriend, who unfortunately, was not the type to get jealous easily.

Unlike his leader who was really obsessive about the maknae, Baekho was never the possessive type. Of course, Minhyun was grateful that the older trusted him so much but sometimes he wanted to see his boyfriend's jealousy just to feel the older's love for him. So far, his skinships with Hyunbin had never bothered the y bandit, Baekho even took Hyunbin as one of his dongsaengs. Instead of getting a jealous Baekho, he was the one getting jealous when Lai Guanlin shared his mic with his lover in a romantic way. Different from Guanlin's usual awkward charm, he was really manly and fierce when he put his face dangerously close to Baekho to share the mic.

"So, are you interested in younger men?" Minhyun started the conversation with his lover during a short break from the show. They got to return to the dorm, where Aron hyung was welcoming them with hugs and homemade food, which the older claimed to cooked himself.

"What?" Baekho asked Minhyun with a confused face, not getting what the younger meant. He was lazing around in Minhyun's room, enjoying the short relaxing time.

"You blushed when Guanlin put his face close to yours." Minhyun accused the older. Guanlin's action did not really bother him, but Baekho's reaction did. The older's cheeks were as red as tomatoes.

"You're jealous, aren't you?" Baekho smirked, pleased to see Minhyun's jealousy, which he did not get to see often. He never thought that his lover would be jealous about him and Guanlin.

"Am not. Now answer. Did you or did you not blush?" Minhyun looked at the older with a stoic expression, waiting for the answer. He was annoyed at Baekho's smiley face that appeared whenever the older was teasing him.

"I did." Baekho answered with a teasing smirk. Minhyun immediately used his pillow to hit the older, wiping the smile from Baekho's face, who started begging instead. "I'm just kidding, Minhyun-ah. Stop hitting me. Please."

Minhyun stopped hitting the older, but kept holding the pillow as a threat. It was funny how such a scary man, who even made Daehwi shivered, could look so terrified of his lover and a pillow. "I was just shocked at the sudden interaction, that's all. Woah, you're really scary Minhyun-ah. I will never try to make you jealous again."

"Good. No blushing and no excessive skinship. Understood?" Minhyun used his cold glare to the older, who nodded immediately before hugging his boyfriend tightly, replacing the cold glare in Minhyun's eyes to his usual warm gaze.

"Yes ma'am. I want to stay in this position forever." Baekho said, inhaling his lover's scent. Minhyun hummed quietly, reciprocating the older's hug. They kept their position for a long time, trying to make up the lack of skinship in the PD101 dorm. Their lips were about to touch when their room's door was opened harshly.

"Can you guys help me? JR is sulking again saying that I get too close with the other trainees. He's been silent for 3 hours already." Ren appeared with a long sigh. Baekho laughed loudly as he had just experienced the same thing, putting his hand for a highfive with Ren, who looked confused. Minhyun hit the older before going outside with Ren to talk to JR.

"You're lucky that I'm not sulking for more than one hour." Minhyun glared at his boyfriend. Baekho only laughed before giving his boyfriend a heart and followed Ren and Minhyun outside to tease JR. 

P.s. Thank you for reading and subscribing this story~ Special thanks to AliceinWonderland25, Kangbandit, Japanesegirl34, and purpleviper for the comments ❤