"You, my dear friend, are an idiot,” Audrina groaned, a perfectly manicured hand pinching the bridge of her nose while nursing a glass of milk and Jack Daniel’s in the other. As ritual, it was Wednesday night which means its girl’s night with Audrina and Tina. I found myself sitting haphazardly on the carpeted floor of Tina’s house across the way from a disapproving Audrina and a slack jawed Tina after explaining my reasons for why I had been seemly avoiding Jaguar and Jungkook’s noticeable absence from my life for the last five days. I haven’t seen Jungkook since Saturday nor have I heard from him since, no text messages, no random movie nights, and worst of all whenever a ball flies over to my side of the fence, it has been Hoseok who would come and retrieve the ball. It was all quite odd; the days were filled with productivity, turning out three chapters for my novel but there was still a notable void that was slowly growing larger. I missed Jungkook and that was a notion that frightened me greatly. I had always found solace in being alone before meeting Jungkook and his friends, yet these days I have come to find the solitude unbearable and uninviting.

      “I don’t think I did anything wrong, Audrina,” I defended, “I only stated the reality of the situation, I was saving us both from the heartache.”

Tina snorted into her glass, “are you sure about that, Mily? Because it sounds like you broke the poor boy’s heart.”

       “He seemed fine when I told him, maybe he was just a bit caught off guard but he took it well! He even said he would see me around!” I nearly shouted in my own defense.

        “What other choice did he have,” Audrina objected, “you basically told him he was worthless to you and you weren’t even going to bother giving him a chance. He’s a man who was just stripped of his pride by the girl he fancied, he wasn’t going to cry or argue with you, you made yourself very clear to him, Mily.”

A tense pause came over the once jovial evening, drawing it to a crashing end. My heart sank into the pit of my stomach as Audrina’s words were digested, leaving a bitter taste of harsh reality in my mouth. I hadn’t imagined that in so few words I might have told Jungkook he meant so little to me when the reality was the exact opposite, Jungkook was my first kiss, the first boy to take me out on a date, and the first boy to actually take interest in a boring bookworm like myself. Jungkook was the sun who woke every restless nerve in my body with just a single word and I was just a pale, fragile flower in a garden full of vibrant, prettier ones who the sun would -no doubt- take more interest in them eventually. Finding myself facing the similar maybe and what if questions; maybe I was a bit too harsh on him, what if he hates me now? Maybe I should apologize to him.

      “We’re just worried about you, Mily,” Tina inserted, reaching her hand across the glass coffee table to place it over my forearm, “we only want to see you happy.”

I glanced back at her, giving my best attempt of a smile but falling short as the unshed tears stung my eyes, “I think I better go,” I stated, wiping off a rogue tear that slipped through the barrier while I stood from my spot.

       “No, Mily,” Tina said, “Don’t go, not like this,” she pleaded sending a harsh glare to Audrina in the process, “you know Audrina can be an when she drinks whiskey, she didn’t mean what she said, right, Audrina?”

Pulling my bag and car keys, I headed towards the front door, “she’s right, T, I’ve got to go, I’ve got a lot on my mind right now and I don’t think it’s best for me to be here.”

      “Mily,” Audrina called running up from behind me and taking my hand in hers, “I’m sorry, Mils I didn’t mean for that to come out as harshly as it did. Please don’t go, we haven’t even started karaoke yet.”

 I shook my head, gently removing my hand from her grasp, “I’m not mad at you, Audrina, I’m more disgusted with myself. I wouldn’t exactly be the best company tonight, so I find it best if I just have a moment to myself and clear my head.”

Audrina pulled back and nodded in the acknowledgement that asking me to stay was a lost cause, “drive safe, Mily.”

The drive back to the house was swift and silent as I turned into the cemented driveway of my home but dreading the thought of another lonely night. Glancing at the time on my watch, the night was still young; seven minutes shy of being eleven which meant nearly all the decent places were closing for the night leaving the only viable options of bars and night clubs which I always found to be unappealing. With a restless sigh I exited my car glancing momentarily at the house next door; noticing the absence of Namjoon’s car which meant Jungkook probably took it to work since he was always scheduled to work on Wednesday nights. I hastily ran up the steps and unlocked the front door before my thoughts could linger any further on the starry-eyed boy. It would do me no good to think of him and sulk, my attention was needed elsewhere which was why I currently sat before my laptop typing away as the fourth chapter of my novel came underway.

                “She felt like she was living in a romance novel as every so often he would twirl her around then quickly pulling her back into his arms that felt like a protective barrier between her and the rest of the world.” I paused as I reread the first sentence then on to the rest of the paragraph.

             “At first she was uncomfortable with their proximity, assuming the closer he held her the clearer he could hear her heart pounding against her chest and the symphony of butterflies fluttering about in her stomach. Staring into his warm eyes gave her the reassurance and confidence she needed that he too felt similarly and thus allowing herself to rest her head against the crook of his neck. Instantaneously, Jungkook-” I froze in place as I read his name aloud, shocked with the realization that I had mistakenly written Jungkook’s name instead of the love interest’s name which was Jonathan. I furious tapped the delete button and corrected the mistake making sure to proof read the rest of my draft to guarantee there were no more Jungkook sightings.  I pinched the bridge of my nose as I leaned back against my desk chair willing away what just happened. I was thankfully roused out of my self-pity thanks to the buzzing of my cellphone against the mahogany desk, but cursing internally at the name displayed across the screen.

    “Jungkook?” I answered, glancing at the time on the upper right corner of my laptop, wondering what on earth the boy could possibly want at 1:00 in the morning.

    “Noona” the boy spoke, dragging out the last vowel like a long note in a song, “bogoshipda,” he slurred in what I assumed to be Korean, the words he spoke unknown to me.

    “I can’t understand what you’re saying,” I replied, worry seeping into me as he spoke again.

    “Noona, saranghaeyeo~” he giggled, but it did little to subside my concern when the reality of the situation dawned on me.

    “Jungkook, are you drunk?” I questioned, listening to the thumping music that was playing in the background,