"Tell me what's been happening, what's been on your mind
Lately you've been searching for a darker place
To hide"
-TOM WALKER, LEAVE A LIGHT ON

There’s an eerie aura surrounding the place, Wonwoo notes as he looks around. Doctors and nurses were oddly quiet, and the fluorescent light of the tiled white hallway is dimmed down, barely lighting the floor. His hands were clasped together atop his lap, shaking as the scene from earlier replayed in his mind.

“I’m going to abort it. This is not good for me. This is not good for anyone.”

“I’m begging you not to. Please reconsider! This is an innocent baby’s life we’re talking about!”

“It’s not going to survive!”

“Don’t call it like that! Like it’s an animal or a parasite!”

“It is a parasite! This ‘thing’ would kill me!” clammy hands clutch at his flat stomach in a hard manner, attempting to somehow inflict some damage inside.

“No! Stop!” he screams, reaching for both of the other man’s wrists to restrain him. “WEN JUNHUI!”

Ugly sobs whacked through Junhui’s body as he collapsed down on the floor. Fat tears rolled down from his eyes down to his chin as he curled up onto the floor. “I don’t want it, Wonwoo. It would kill me. Mama wouldn’t like it. Papa would disown me. Wonwoo, please.”

Wonwoo crouched down to his friend’s level and reaches out to cup his face with his cold pale hands. “Jun, Jun listen to me, okay? You don’t need to abort the baby, Jun. We can keep it. I’ll help you keep it. Minghao would understand. Minghao would help us, hm? Mingyu would too. We’re going to be here for you, okay?” he tells him.

“I don’t want to lose my parents.” Junhui sobbed.

“You’re their precious son, I’m sure they would understand, Junhui—”

“No, Wonwoo, you’re the one who doesn’t understand. T-they didn’t tell me that I’m a carrier. They lied to me and told me I’m not one because they don’t want a carrier for a son! When Mama was pregnant with Fengjun, I watched her pray every day and night, asking God to let her have a son who isn’t a carrier.” Junhui says in a quiet voice, but enough for Wonwoo to hear and understand despite the accented Korean.

Wonwoo didn’t know what to reply to that.

“Don’t tell Minghao, please, huh? I want you to be there with me at the hospital. I don’t want him to know.”

Wonwoo’s feet trembled and he tried his best to shake his head to somehow erase that memory. A shadow casting over him helped do the trick for him, although it lingers at the back of his mind. “Thank you for coming.” He tells Minghao as he looks up at him.

He feels bad for betraying Jun and telling his boyfriend to come to the hospital, but he knows that keeping it from Minghao is worse than dampening his friendship with Jun.

Minghao sits beside Wonwoo, a deep sigh escaping his lips. “For how long he has been inside?” he asks worriedly.

“It’s for about an hour now. Male carrier abortion takes longer than female abortion.” Wonwoo replies with a dull tone. “I should’ve just kept him home. I should’ve tied him up, I’m so sorry.” He then turns to Minghao with glassy eyes, tears just building up. “We’re only in our third year, what are we doing killing someone who has done nothing to us?”

The Chinese male keeps his eyes on the tiled floor of the hallway, shrugging his shoulders lightly as if it’s the most normal thing to do, when in fact, that’s the only reaction he can give out. It’s partly his fault as well, experimenting like that without any kind of protection. True that neither of them knew that Junhui could produce, but that doesn’t give them the stupidity to not use any kind of protection or means of care. Wonwoo was right, he should’ve just restrained his best friend. But even so, even if Wonwoo and Minghao is a part of Jun’s life, that doesn’t mean they get to make decisions on what to do with Jun’s life.

“He has had enough people telling him what he should and shouldn’t do. Things and events he’s forced to do and join because of the leash his family has on his neck. I know that it’s wrong—that—what Mr. and Mrs. Wen is doing is wrong. What we’re doing right now is wrong. Wonwoo, he’s already suffocated as it is, I don’t want him to die.” Minghao finally turns to Wonwoo, emotions hidden on his face, but threatening to burst. “We can have him and the baby alive, but they won’t be living. The baby would most probably be in foster care if the officials or his parents found out. Jun’s parents would be more strict and I don’t want the love of my life, taking drugs again or pressing a blade on his wrist.”

Wonwoo stared speechless. Minghao knew all along.

“Let’s give him what he wants, just this once.”

“Patient number 536, Mr. Moon Junhui?” the nurse calls from outside a ward. Wonwoo and Minghao immediately stood up and walked towards her.

“How is he?”

“As we have relayed to Mr. Jeon and Mr. Wen before the surgery, there are certain risks to performing a surgical abortion on male carriers. He bled a lot during the process due to his fragile womb, resulting to damage. We’re sorry to tell you this, but he won’t be having any children anymore in the future. He’s still a bit groggy from the anesthetic, but he’s able to form coherent words now. You may stay with him inside but try not to be too loud. His emotions may be all over the place.”

Minghao only resorted to a dumb nod, forcing himself to listen even though he wanted nothing more than to run inside Junhui’s ward and hug the life out of his boyfriend, who’s probably panicking alone inside.

“Is there anything more we should know?” Wonwoo inquires and the nurse nods. “Okay then, I’ll listen.” He tells her and then turns to Minghao. “You can go inside, I’m sure he needs someone right now.”

“He didn’t want me to know, doesn’t that translate to he doesn’t want me inside?”

“I know him more than you do.” Wonwoo counters.

“You’re hurting my pride.” Minghao mumbles before he smiles dimly at Wonwoo, getting the courage to enter the ward and appro