"Give me your phone."

It is late already when everyone decides to call it a day.

They bring Minhyuk and Kihyun to the door.

Hoseok reaches out for Kihyuns phone when the latter puts on his shoes.

"Here."

With a smile, Hoseok takes it. "I'm going to put in my number and call me so I have yours."

"I want hyungs number." Jooheon whines.

"Nope. Only I get it." Hoseok answers nonchalantly and calls himself.

Changkyun smiles mischievously. " I already have it."

Hoseok glares at him. " I'm going to delete it later."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Don't test me."

"Guys guys.", Minhyuk says with arms wide spread. " Since Hoseok already called dips on my Kihyunnie, you can all have my number. We'll make a kakaotalk group and won't invite them."

"Hyung~~~" Jooheon beams at him and everyone, except Kihyun and Hoseok build a circle around him to exchange numbers.

Kihyun chuckles and shakes his head in disbelief. when he looks at them.

Hoseok moves closer to him.

" Maybe I shouldn't have told them about the date."

"Maybe."

Kihyun takes his phone back.

"I'll text you.", Hoseok says, hands in his pockets. "Make sure to answer me."

"Of course I will."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Okay…"

"Oh my God, it is time to go.", Minhyuk makes a gagging sound in the background and pushes Kihyun out of the door. " Bye guys. See you soon."

Kihyun waves over his shoulder and wants to see Hoseok once more but Minhyuk forces him over to the elevator too fast. Minhyuk waits until they are outside in the cool night air before he links their arms and winks at him.

" Successful day, isn't it?"

"Yeah…" Kihyun can't contain the stupid grin on his face and as soon as they are around the next corner they take each others hands and jump up and down in crazy glee.

" I'm so excited for you, Hyun!"

"I'm so happy I could die! He asked me out on a date!"

"He asked you out on a date!"

"What should I do?!"

They jump for a bit more until the first people start to stare at them and then continue their way home, out of breath but happy.

"How did he ask?" Minhyuk asks eagerly.

" Well… all of sudden he said something about the situation being ridiculous and then he asked. My heart literally skipped a beat."

"He must have been so nervous."

"I was nervous." Kihyun emphasises.

"Did you decide on a day already?"

"Not yet."

Minhyuk puts an arm around his shoulder and gives his friend a squeeze. " I'm so happy for you. Really."

"The date didn't happen yet though. It could go terrible." Kihyun shudders at the thought.

"Doesn't matter. I'm just happy you found a nice caring, exorbitantly good looking guy to go on a date with. Such a great thing. No matter how it goes, today we'll be happy."

Kihyun breaths in deeply. " Yes… I guess it is."

" It is. Trust me. So terribly great.", he hugs him once more before he pulls Kihyun further down the road. " And now let's get our asses home. It's cold and I want to watch one more episode of my show before I go to bed."

Soon they arrive in the next subway station and Minhyuk leaves Kihyun next to the  entrance to recharge his subway card at the close automat.

Kihyuns mobile vibrates in his pocket and he pulls it out a bit too fast to be cool. But who cares anymore when Hoseok is texting.

Kihyun smiles stupidly when he opens the message.

From: Hoseok
You're home yet?~ ~

To: Hoseok
We're at the subway station. Minhyuk has to reload his card.

From: Hoseok
You're feeling okay now?

To: Hoseok
Perfectly fine ^-^/

From: Hoseok.
Still hurry up and get home~~ it's cold outside. You can't get sick. You have to go on a date with me ~~

To: Hoseok
You will keep reminding me of it? ㅋㅋ

From: Hoseok
Until I see you again~~

"Who is Hoseok?"

Kihyun winces when someone peeks over his shoulder.

"Chihwan!" he yells and almost hits the guy in the face.

"Who is Hoseok?" the other guy asks once again, a slight pout on his lips.

Kihyun pulls his mobile to his chest, taking a step back. " No one you need to know."

"Are you cheating on me?"

Kihyun rolls his eyes. " There is nothing to cheat on because we aren't even close to being a couple. And now please excuse me. I have to go."

He spins on his heel and walks over to the automat where Minhyuk is still waiting for his turn.

"Kihyun!"

"What?!"

" I thought we could talk for a bit." Chihwan catches up and adjusts his pace.

Kihyun stops abruptly, turning over to face him. " Chihwan. Once and for all. Stop doing this to yourself. I know you find it funny and it gives you some kind of creepy satisfaction to make me angry but stop it. I don't like you that way. And right now I frankly don't even want to be in the same room with you. So leave me alone, okay? Please."

Chihwan shuffles his feet, gaze averted to the ground." I was just trying to act nice."

"You were acting like a creeper. Don't read people's messages without their consent."

"Hey Chihwan, still trying to get into pants that aren't meant for you?" Minhyuk appears next to Kihyun.

Kihyun isn't sure if he is glad about the support or should be worried because Minhyuk and Chihwan never liked each other to the extent that fist were flying when they were younger.

" Minhyuk. Great to see you."

Oh, sweet sarcasm.

"Why didn't you tell me he is still bothering you, Kihyun?"

" He's just talking to me."

"See. He's fine with it." Chihwan beams at them and Kihyun glares. " No I'm not. So please stop from now on. Let's go Minhyuk."

" Keep away, Chihwan." Minhyuk threatens.

"What if I don't?"

Kihyun pinches the bridge of his nose in annoyance when they get closer to each other.

Boys will be boys?

When will the day come they won't be?

" Want to see what happens if you don't?"

"Bring it on!"

"Minhyuk. We're leaving. Now!"

Without further ado he takes Minhyuk by the hand and pulls him away.

" Can you stop being in each others face as soon as you see each other?"

" Can he stop being a creeper?", Minhyuk throws back as they make their way down the stairs to the trains. " Why didn't you tell me he is still bothering you?"

" As I said, he is just talking crap."

"That he does for sure.", Minhyuk huffs. " Woah. So annoying."

"Calm down, Minhyuk. Let's go home and forget about him."

 

OOO
 

Ten minutes after they arrive home someone calls Kihyun and he is surprised when he sees it is Hoseok.

" Hello? Is something the matter?"

"Kihyun…", Hoseok says lowly. " Why do you have a stalker called Chihwan?"

"One moment please." Kihyun says and covers the mobile with his hand.

"Lee Minhyuk!"  his voice booms through the house. " How the hell does Hoseok know about Chihwan?!"

Minhyuk appears in the doorway of his room, a half eaten carrot in his hands. " I texted the others in our new chatroom that they should never ever tell Hoseok about the psychopathic stalker that keeps following you around."

"Minhyuk…", Kihyun cries, his forehead against the cool metal of the fridge. " What is wrong with you?"

Minhyuk shrugs. " Why are you mad at me? I told them not to tell him. It is clearly not my fault."

"Run or I'm shoving a frying pan up your ."

With a shriek Minhyuk claps the door shut.

"Hoseok.", with a deep sigh Kihyun is back on the phone. " Please don't take this too serious. I don't know what Minhyuk wanted to achieve by this but he was clearly exaggerating."

"There is no psycho following you around?"

"Well… he is not a psycho…"

Hoseok gasps. " So there is someone following you around?"

"Yes and no… but… Hoseok. Why are we having this conversation?"

For a moment he only hears Hoseoks breathing in the back.

" Because I got worried." he mumbles then.

And Kihyuns heart successfully spills once more.

" I'm sorry for worrying you a lot today."

" You really did...but nothing has been your fault so you are forgiven."

"Thanks."

"Back to the stalker. I might don't look like it but I can kick his to Siberia if you want me to."

"You definitely look like it."

"I do?"

"Yes. But on the inside you're a cinnamon roll."

"Hmm.", some noise Kihyun can't make out on the other side. " I can deal with cinnamon roll. But I'm not sure if I can deal with this guy. You promise me he is not dangerous?"

"Dangerously stupid but I can handle it."

"You tell me if something is wrong?"

"Okay."

"Promise."

"I promise."

"Good.", Kihyun almost sees Hoseoks bright smile in front of him and he can't help but to beam at the wall.

" Do you have time to meet on next Wednesday? Around 6?"

Kihyun thinks for a moment. "Sounds good. Where?"

"That I don't know yet. I need to think of a great place to go."

"I'm good with everything. We don't have to do something special."

"You're cute, Kihyun."

Hoseoks mouth becomes more and more dangerous for Kihyun and his blood pressure.

"I need to hang up now.". Hoseoks says. There is a voice in the background Kihyun can't really place because it is too quiet.

" I need to tell Changkyun that you're fine and nothing happened.", he scoffs. " That boy is totally fixated on you. How did you do this?"

"Caramel coffee."

"Make it for me once."

"I will."
 

 

OOO
 

 

 

"Insulin?"

"Yes."

"Blood pressure pills?"

"Yes."

"Mobile?"

"Yes."

"Charger?"

"Yes."

Minhyuk nods in approval.

" I think you're good to go.", he pulls Kihyuns scarf a bit tighter around the others head. " It's warm enough?"

"Minhyuk… I'm going out with Hoseok. This is not the first ascent of the Kilinamjaro."

"You going on a date does feel like something world shaking though."

"I believe I should be offended by that, shouldn't I?"

Minhyuk turns him to the door and gives him a small pat on his backside. " Go. Hoseok must be waiting for you already."

" He texted me five minutes ago."

Minhyuk waves at him from the door. "Have fun Kihyunie. Don't do anything I wouldn't do… wait...there isn't a lot...just...Don't do anything I would do on a first date you hear me!?"

"Yes, Mom!" He waves one last time at Minhyuk before he hurries down to the first floor, taking two stairs at once.

Outside he looks around and soon spots Hoseok under the light of a street lamp close by.

"Hoseok!" He hurries over, almost stumbles over the trash can along the way in all of his excitement.

Hoseok brightly smiles at him. " That happy to see me?"

"I…" Kihyun averts his gaze, all of sudden aware of how crazy he acts.

Hoseoks chuckles.

" Hello, Kihyun."

For a short moment his hugs him.

Kihyun wants to stay a bit longer in the embrace but far too early Hoseok releases him.

" You have everything? Insulin? Blood pressure pills?"

"What I have is a sudden déjà vu."

" Minhyuk already made sure you bring everything with you?"

"More than once."

Hoseok laughs and nods down the street. " Let's go then."

"Where to?" Kihyun asks when he follows him, hands on the stripes of his bag.

" I thought about going to the light festival at Cheonggyecheon . I have never been there before. How does it sound?" he asks and Kihyun notices the slight nervousness in his eyes.

" Sounds great." he beams and hopes that Hoseok doesn't feel too nervous because frankly, he is tense enough for two.

They make their way over to the next subway station and soon sit in the warmth of one of the trains. Or better, Kihyun is sitting on the last free seat while Hoseok stands in front of him, seemingly super content with it. Kihyun didn't want to sit but Hoseok forced him in the end. He can be so persistent from time to time.

"How was your day?" Kihyun asks.

Hoseok sways his head. " It was… a blur."

"A blur?"

"Yes. Boss was a and did everything wrong and in the end I had to save his again but today I didn't care because my thoughts where somewhere else." His trademark wink and Kihyun slides further down in his seat to hide his blush.

But Hoseok notices.

Of course he does.

Because his eyes are on Kihyun and nothing else. Kihyun notices when Hoseok always knows what he needs, be it a tissue or a hand to help him out of somewhere as if he had never done anything else.
Hoseok knows when he is too cold and pulls him into a coffee shop, sees when he is lost and guides him with a gentle hand on his back, looks back at him when he almost gets lost in the huge crowd at the light festival. His hand reaching out for Kihyun so he can easily take it, his smile when Kihyun once again is mesmerized by his beautiful face.
Hoseok is there.
With all the warmth and affection he can come up with and Kihyun knows pretty early that after this evening he is done for good.

If he hadn't been already.

But who wouldn't be happy about being done for such a beautiful human being?

And as handsome as Hoseok is,  Kihyun can't remember ever having met a person whose inside have been this beautiful to him.

" Do you like it?"

Hoseok takes another bite of the ramyun he ordered and nods intensely. " It's so good."

They became hungry and Kihyun suggested a small ramyun restaurant close to his apartment in which he occasionally eats with Minhyuk.

Who would have known ramyun is Hoseoks religion?

Hoseok takes another bite of his ramyun and beams in glee. " So good!"

Kihyun chuckles. " So we went to the right restaurant?"

Hoseok shows his thumb, totally engrossed in his food.

" Are you from Seoul?" Kihyun asks while he takes his chopsticks and starts to eat himself.

" Around Seoul. I came here together with Hyunwoo after High School. We met in our second year and became friends."

" So how did you end up living with Changkyun, Jooheon and Hyungwon?"

Hoseok makes a sudden mess, as if Kihyun just said something totally unexpected. He wipes away the stain with a tissue. " I know Jooheons older brother. He asked me to look after Jooheon. At that time he was already friends with Changkyun and Hyungwon and because those two didn't have a place to go we took them in."

" I see." Kihyun says slowly.

He had hoped that after listening to Hoseoks answer, all of his questions would have been answered but he still didn't get the information he was so curious about.

" Is something the matter?" Hoseok asks with big eyes when he feels Kihyuns gaze on him.

" I was wondering about something."

" And that would be?"

" The night... we first met. What was the reason for you to act the way you did? You seemed... nervous that night. Almost fearful."

Something changes in Hoseoks stance. From one second to another his adorable beam disappears, replaced by a serious expression. He puts his chopsticks away.

" I guess I'd be curious, too, if I was you."

" You don't have to answer me though." Kihyun says in a hurry, having noticed the change in his behaviour.

Hoseok shakes his head. " I want to see you again."

" What... does that have to do with it?"

" I want to be honest with you from the beginning. Hiding important things from the beginning... it never ends well."

Kihyun can't remember having ever looked into such sincere eyes.

Almost... hypnotising.

" I just worry." Hoseok continues.

" Why?"

Hoseok takes a sip of his coke, only slowly sets it back on the table. " I'm worried you will turn away from me. I'm scared your thoughts of me will change."

" Why don't you try first?"

Hoseok studies Kihyun for a second, seems to come to a decision then and runs his hand trough his blonde hair.

He leans back into his chair.

" What would you say if I told you I.... or better... we were involved in illegal business until a while ago?"

" I would ask you what kind of illegal business."

" That's a good question."

The ramyun are long forgotten.

" You see.", Hoseok support his elbows on the table. " When Hyunwoo and I came to Seoul, things were pretty harsh for us. We didn't have money and we pretty easily ended up in bad circles. We started to do some delivery business. You know, the bigger ones in the business don't like to get their hands dirty. We kind of... did well. Some guy - you don't need to know his name- he took us in and we took care of his delivery businesses. To put it briefly, he gave us the goods and we brought it to the recipient. I'm not even sure what it was that was inside all the time. Weapons, drugs, the usual stuff you can think about, I guess...", he shrugs, eyes wide all of sudden. " We never did drugs though of hurt people, of course! " he adds hastily.

Kihyun is surprised about the amount of worry in his dark eyes.

Is he that scared of being rejected by Kihyun?

" You said it was until a while ago?" Kihyun asks further.

Hoseok nods. " Yes. You see, we did that a few years, earned a lot of money. That is how we could buy that apartment. Then the boys came to us. Jooheon is actually the younger brother of a gang leader. That's how we ended up working together, just like with Changkyun and Hyungwon. But you see, even though we just delivered  goods and didn't take part in anything else, things sometimes got pretty dangerous. Of course, we got lots of money out of it but one day that didn't seem to be important anymore. The boys... I really love them and I wanted them away from it. That night, when we first met. Some things went wrong actually. And after that we decided together to quit things and do normal stuff. Getting  back on track. I actually really learned about marketing, that wasn't a lie. Yeah... that's it."

He ends his talk, clasps his hands together and restlessly plays with his thumps while his gaze wanders from Kihyun back down to the table.

" Why do you seem to worried all of sudden?"

" Do I seem like it?", Hoseok chuckles awkwardly. " Then I'm sorry... I just feel, so vulnerable all at once..."

" Because of what I am going to say?"

" Actually.", Hoseok hangs his head. " Yes..."

Kihyuns heart only softens the more.

"Do you…", Hoseok looks at his folded hands, voice almost a mumble. "Do you by any chance feel different about me now?"

" How do you expect me to feel by now?"

Hoseok looks so helpless all of sudden. " I'm not sure. Scared? Disappointed? It is not one of my greatest achievements. "

Does he?

There is something inside of him that makes him feel uncomfortable. He doesn't like the feeling at all but as he ponders about it further it becomes clear to him that nothing about his view on Hoseok changed.

Sure. He would have loved to have heard another story. Puppies, kids, not drugs. But people have their stories, and Kihyun himself is by far no angel. If Hoseok knew what kind of people he knew back in the days...

No.

It really didn't change anything

He feels drawn to Hoseok like he did before.

" No. There is nothing like that.", Kihyun says slowly, when he made up his mind. "I'm only worried."

"I told you that you never have to worry about me an--"

"Hoseok." Kihyun stops his rant. For a moment he looks at Hoseoks hand on the table, contemplating about being brave or not. Then, slowly he reaches over the table and takes Hoseoks warm hand in his.

" You could never scare me. You just… don't have it in you. I'm worried because I don't want you to be in danger, not because of what you do."

" I promise you, Kihyun. I told you about everything and we quit. For good."

" Thanks for telling me all of this. And I believe you. " Kihyun squeezes his hand a bit tighter. .

Hoseok stares at their hands as if he is hypnotised , his lips slightly ajar as if he wants to say more.

For a moment, Kihyun is worried that he will repel him, whatever reason it may be.

His fear was unreasonable.

Hoseoks finger tighten their grip around his hand, showing Kihyun that he won't let go that soon.

" You're amazing, Kihyun."

" I tend to think differently."

" No. Seriously.", the corner of his lips curl slightly. " So many other people would have left by now. But you're just sitting there as if I just told you about my basic studies."

" It is not like I'm too happy about it, too be honest. But who am I to judge you. If you promise me you've never done something worse to anyone."

" I didn't! I swear!"

" I believe you.", Kihyun can't help but to chuckle when Hoseoks face turns pale.  " I really do believe you, Hoseok. And this changes nothing."

 

 

 

 

OOO

 

 

It is late and they are on the way back to Kihyuns apartment.

Kihyun didn't want Hoseok to bring him back home because it is a detour for him but Hoseok acted like he couldn't hear him at all and here they are.

They are still holding hands, slightly swinging them as they walk down the street.

Both of them still haven't talk about what it is by now, their relationship. Kihyun thinks the question has time to be answered and right now he doesn't want to destroy the comfortable silence between them, or worse, let go off Hoseoks hand.

" Did you have fun today?" Hoseok asks when Kihyuns home comes into their view.

" I did. You?"

Hoseok smiles brightly and squeezes his hand.

That is enough answer for Kihyun.

" Favourite anime."

They have played the question game for quiet a while now.

Hoseok puckers his lips and ponders about it. " Definitely Kiss him, not me."

Kihyun snorts. " Shoujo it is?"

" With my whole being."

" To each his own."

" My turn.", Hoseoks rubs his neck as he comes up with another question. " Cornflakes and then milk, or milk and then the cornflakes?"

Kihyun gasps in fake agony. " Of course cornflakes and then the milk. If you do it the other way around we need to part ways this instant."

" Who do you take me for, Yoo Kihyun?"

 " Did you ever have a blackout after drinking too much?" Kihyun continues.

Hoseok nods. " New years eve 2015 and I'm completely sure it was Jooheons plum brandy."

" Jooheon seems dangerous."

" He is. Don't be fooled by his dimples."

They stop at the traffic lights.

It is late and no car can be seen but both of them are in no hurry to part ways so every delay is welcomed.

" Where are your parents?" Hoseok asks next.

The light turns green and they start to cross the street.

" Abroad. For a few years now. I'm not necessarily close to them so the occasional video call on my birthday is enough for me. How about yours?"

Hoseok smiles sadly, his thumb running over Kihyuns back of his hand. " I've never met my Dad and Mom died when I was 18."

" Oh… I'm sorry…"

Hoseok brought up the parents but Kihyun nevertheless feels like the worst idiot around.

Hoseoks seems to notice his distress and reaches out to even out a strand of hair that sticks out on Kihyuns head.

 " I can deal with it by now. She had cancer for a long time so it was almost a relief when she could finally go."

A cold shiver runs down Kihyuns spine.

"A relief for her and for me."

He feels sick all of sudden.

Hoseoks mother died after a long time of sickness?

Hoseok had to witness… he already went down this way, staying by the side of someone sick  and he himself… Kihyun....can never promise him that he won't end up the same way?

"Kihyun?"

How could he ever expect that of him?

"Kihyun, hey …."

How could he… now that he knows….

"Kihyun!"

With a start Kihyun snaps out of his thoughts.

"What's wrong?", Hoseok cups his face with one hand. "You're so pale all of sudden."

" I'm sorry… I…"

"Kihyun. What's wrong?", Hoseok chuckles, but it is far from happy, streaked by a sudden uneasiness. " Is it something I said?"

Kihyun shakes his head to get back into reality.

He manages a smile. " I'm sorry...I was lost in my thoughts I guess."

Hoseok doesn't look too convinced.

" You can tell me."

" Tell you what?"

" You can tell me if you don't want to meet anymore..", he takes a deep breath. " Wow... saying that was harder than I thought."

"No no!", Kihyun denies as fast as he can. " It was great, really. I enjoyed every minute of today. I just… thought about something I shouldn't have."

" Do you want to share that thought?"

" Another time, okay?"

Hoseok studies his features for a moment and the agrees. " Alright. This worries me a lot but I don't want to pressure you."

Kihyun takes both of his hands in his.

He himself is surprised about his sudden boldness.

" Thanks for today."

" So…", Hoseok starts. " Could you…"

"Yes?"

"After today… could you imagine…us...?"

" You... want to... be with me?"

Hoseok seems to be taken aback by the questions.

"Am I that great in hiding it?"

"Hiding what?"

" Now I get what Minhyuk meant with oblivious. Come here."

Hoseok pulls him closer by his hands until Kihyun finds himself in his warm embrace. Hoseok sighs in content, even goes as far as nuzzling his face into Kihyuns neck. " I really really really want to be with you, Kihyun. I thought I made that clear all this time."

Kihyun only slowly responds to the embrace.

First he turned into a pillar of salt, that close to Hoseok, not knowing how to handle the sudden proximity because Hoseok already manages to take his breath with smaller gestures and this... this is so much more. His body is acting on his own when he places a soft kiss on Hoeoks cheek, his lips lingering a bit too long on the soft skin.
He is not sure where he got all that courage from, he who blushes all the time around Hoseok and is more of a nervous mess than anything else.

Maybe because he hates the uncertainty in Hoseoks voice.

Maybe because he wants the other to go home with the thought that he cares about him a lot.

He takes in Hoseoks smell, already addicted to it.

Still, the nagging voice in the back of his head won't disappear.

" It was great. You were great. Still, we should think about it and don't rush anything."

Hoseok holds him a tiny bit closer. " I don't want to. And I don't need to. Don't say those things after kissing me."

"Hoseok."

"No.", the other whines. " Don't bring up cons. I don't want to hear it. I want you."

Oh, how happy this makes Kihyun.

But the voice  won't leave, telling him to let the man run, run far away from him so he won't have to suffer when Kihyun will.

`Don't live in what if's all the time'

Minhyuks voice joins the other, and Kihyun knows deep down, that his best friend is right but he is in too much uproar to decide on anything.

" You know, I'm sick." Kihyun softly pushes Hoseok away so he can look into his eyes.

" I know. I don't care. I have a bad past. You don't care."

"Still. Promise me to think about it."

"How long?"

"How long do you need?"

"I don't need to think about it. You're the one telling me to." Hoseok slightly pouts. Kihyun reaches out for him but stops the last second and pulls his hands back.

"I just want you to be sure, Hoseok."

"Kihyun.", Hoseok bends towards him, studying his features. " Something is bothering you. I can see But I will trust your promise that it has nothing to do with me."

"Thanks."

"Sleep over it. And then tell me. Okay?"

Kihyun nods.

Hoseok reaches for his hand again. " It is not because of my past?"

Kihyun shakes his head. " It's not."

" Okay..."

Once again Kihyun finds himself in his embrace.

" Sleep well, Kihyun. And talk to me soon."

" I will. Good night.

And they part ways.