How had things ended up like this…?

I was currently sitting on my floor, curled into myself as I watched Ji Eun flirt with Taehyung. “Gross,” I mouthed to Ji Eun as she rolled her eyes. I had kind of hoped to just squeal over how adorable Nam Joohyuk was in Weightlifting Fairy with Ji Eun, but here we were, the four of us in my tiny dorm. I looked over to where Jimin was leaning against my desk, eating his second pack of gummy bears. “I want some,” I mumbled under my breath. Too bad I was too nervous to move from my spot and grab mine.

Why am I like this?

I reached into my sweater pocket and took out my headphones, connecting them straight into my phone jack and only putting the left bud in my ear.

Sweet solace.

“Where are you? and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
This sick strange darkness
Comes creeping on so haunting every time”

This song always reminded me of Jin. I missed him more and more each day.

I sighed and stood up despite the uncomfortable knot in my stomach, willing myself to walk over to where Jimin was. A tiny voice screamed in the back of my mind what a mistake that would be, but I needed to stop being such a nervous wreck, especially in my own dorm!

“Will you come home and stop this pain tonight?
Stop this pain tonight”

I walked over nonchalantly to where the snacks were on my desk and shuffled through the bags, trying to find mine. Why did Jimin and Taehyung have so many bags?! I continued to sort through them until I spotted a familiar green shade of plastic. “Finally,” I whispered to myself as I found the gummy bears buried under Ji Eun’s ice cream. I should probably put that in the mini fridge-

“Don't waste your time on me
You're already the voice inside my head
I miss you, miss you”

I squeezed the pack of gummy bears in my hand before hurriedly taking my phone out of my sweater pocket and pressing next. I should have deleted that song from my phone a long time ago, but I could never bring myself to. It was one of the only things that constantly reminded me he was real.

I put my phone back in my pocket and headed to an empty corner of the room, plopping down on the worn wooden floor and ready to open my gummy bears when I felt a presence next to me. I glanced away from my pack of candy to see that it was Jimin, calmly sitting right next to me. 

What the flying .

My dorm may be small, but there were still plenty of other places for him to sit. I ignored it for the time being and opened my gummy bears.

A mix of a sigh and a moan came out of my lips from delight, forgetting that Jimin was sitting right next to me. I cautiously looked over to my right where Jimin was playing with the rings on his fingers. I observed the way he twirled them around his fingers, entranced by how cute his hands were. Were hands even supposed to be cute? Was that a thing? He peered up at me from under his lashes, his eyes widening when he notices I was staring at him.

"Like what you see?" He said with his usual smirk. "Oh, uh, I was just observing your nervous habit," I retorted as I hid my small embarrassed smile into the sleeve of my sweater. "What do you mean?" He replied, his brows coming together in confusion. "You twist the rings around your fingers. It's quite fascinating to watch, actually." He stopped and looked down at how his thumb and index finger were wrapped around a ring. "Oh."

Was he blushing? The room was dimly lit, but if so... Oh, how the tables have turned.

A huge giddy grin threatened to spread across my face. I'd never made someone blush before. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone has one." I quickly recovered, hoping my observation hadn't made him uncomfortable. "Yeah? Then what's yours?” He asked in a playfully challenging tone. I should have kept my mouth shut, but since I felt like I'd exposed him, I guess it was only fair to tell him mine. "I bite the inside of my bottom lip and tap things with my fingers," I said in a rush, regretting the fact that I brought up the subject in the first place.

"You were wearing headphones at the club and you’re wearing them now," Jimin said while looking at me dead in the eyes. "Doesn't that count?"

I stared at his rings and then back up at him. "Yeah, well, I guess I'm just a very anxious person." I gazed at the floor, the wood's patterns swirling together as memories came back to me in flashes. I put the gummy bears down, gripping the inside of my arms painfully tight.

“Take that out of your ears and learn to listen when people are talking to you!” Jin’s dad yelled as he yanked the headphones out of my ears. “Go take out the trash! dammit!”

“Dad, leave her alone! She’s just sitting down and minding her own business!” Jin shouted back, coming down the stairs from his room.

“I wouldn’t have to yell if you both weren’t so ing useless!” He screamed, kicking the couch where I was sitting before opening the front door and slamming it shut.

“I’m sorry, I’ll go take it out,” I whispered and got up slowly, feeling my body shake a little at what had just happened. “Hey, hey, listen. Look at me.” Jin gently said, grabbing me by the shoulders. “I’m going to get us out of this hell one day, I promise. Trust me.” I nodded and hugged him tightly.

I trusted Jin with my life already, there was no need for him to ask.

“What are you listening to?” Jimin asked, bringing me out of my