Usually Seungri makes Jiyong’s own half feel whole and that’s the reason he manages going through this live he’s living. Though he likes to see himself as an independent human being not many days pass without him feeling the need in his body, in his heart, for the younger man to wrap him up in strong arms and a warm chest. When this happens, in this position, Jiyong is able to forget even the worst of thought, the most of stress and it’s nice knowing such a person is in his life for whenever he needs it.

Tonight, however, he feels nothing. He’d arrived home in a state of numbness he’s never experienced and hadn’t managed to notice his lover in the living room. Taking off his shirt he’d folded it neatly instead of throwing it in the wash and placed it on top of his toilet to put away later. The shower he’d taken hadn’t managed to warm him no matter how much he kept raising the heat and so his last resort was to go straight to bed even if the time said no more than 7pm. 

Seungri joins him not many minutes later, already wary of Jiyong’s mood but slips into bed with him nonetheless. They tangle themselves up in each other. Jiyong feels like his insides are ice. Nothing seems to heat him up and he goes to stand from the bed, but Seungri catches his wrist before he walks too far, “where are you going, hyung?”, he asks voice dripping with concern.
   “I’m just going to grab my shirt from the bathroom”, he answers and from his own ears even his voice sounds distant.
   “I put it in the wash, hyung”, Seungri answers, tugging a bit for Jiyong to lie back down, oblivious to how disheveled Jiyong suddenly feels. And then his face crumples. He crumples. Tears and snot are everywhere, Seungri’s arms desperately tugging him in as Jiyong sobs into the chest of the other man, “it’s okay, it’s okay hyung we’ll be okay”, he repeats like a mantra but Jiyong can’t seem to collect himself for more than two seconds a time only to start crying all over again.
   “The.. the shirt”, he starts, voice cracking, “it smells like him, I was gonna keep it”, he coughs a bit and Seungri pulls back, face pained at Jiyong’s words as he tries to dry away the tears still falling.
   “I’m sorry, hyung”, but Jiyong doesn’t answer.

The next morning Jiyong wakes, headache massive, to a small present, obviously from his lover, on the bed. When he opens it he laughs wetly at the bottle of perfume in his hands. Seunghyun’s perfume. He’s ridiculous, but the scent of his hyung floats around in the air as Jiyong sprays it. His heart feels lighter. Two years without Choi Seunghyun suddenly don’t feel as infinitely long.

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Not going to lie, I feel a bit emotional at Seunghyun enlisting today, and so this happened...

우리 탑, 어서 들어오세요, 화이팅 갑시다 x