Because life isn't always full of rainbows and happiness. Slight angst but eventual fluff.

'Why? Is it because I'm never good enough for you?'

No.

'You're always busy! When will you free some time to talk to me rather than talk to me in your free time?'

I was wrong.

'I can't do this anymore! I'm sorry but I think we should end this.'

Please don't.

'Goodbye Sana.'

'NO!' Sana shot awake in her bed. Her breathing was shallow and beads of sweat had collected on her forehead. The blankets and squirrel plush had landed on the floor from the girl's struggling. She ran a hand through her messy hair and sighed.

It was 4 am, an ungodly time to be awake but she was. The sleeping pills had worn off and now she was back in her never ending nightmare.

Sleeping pills and alcohol was her best friend for the past six months. She would either be at the clubs, hooking up with girls and getting drunk to get her mind off a certain other girl or lay awake in bed, memories of her past taking over her mind. There was even a period of time where she hated coming home because it was cold and empty. There was no one to greet her; no one to ask her how was her day, no one to show affection to.

It shouldn't be affecting her this much, not after what she had done. It was a selfish and thing to do, neglecting her girlfriend for work.

Her girlfriend, who had waited up for her to come home every night. Her girlfriend, who had always sent her texts, reminding her to have her meals, her girlfriend, who never complained when she had to cancel their plans last minute for meetings that cropped up.

Her girlfriend, who loved her more than anything in the world.

Sana picked up the squirrel plushie and its furry cheeks. Now she understood what people meant, that money can't buy happiness. She should have had a balance, to earn a living and pamper her rather than focus on only earning to provide a carefree future for them.

'I was wrong. So wrong.' Sana hugged the plush tightly to her chest and clamped a hand over to prevent her painful sobs from escaping.

'Sana! Congratulations! Your proposal scored us a deal with that play-hard-to-get client! I think boss has another promotion in store for you!' Her co-worker clapped her on the back when she stepped into office.

'Really? That's great.' She forced a smile.

She would trade her promotion to get her back.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

'The usual?' Jihyo asked when she saw Sana plop down on the bar stool.

'Yeah. Thanks.'

'You know, drinking so much can't be good for your liver.' The bartender said as she prepared Sana's drink but the lady remained silent.

'You should talk to her you know? I have her contact.' Jihyo said as she placed the drink on the countertop.

'She wouldn't want to see me. I'm probably the last person on earth she would want to see.'

'Oh come on.. It's been six months. You've been drinking like a damn alcoholic, popping sleeping pills and having nightmares for six months! I'm not asking you to get together with her again. I'm asking you to find closure.'

Sana gulped her Campari and Soda.

Jihyo pursed her lips and scribbled down a number on the napkin before sliding it to Sana.

'Please. Do it for yourself.' Jihyo said before moving to prepare drinks for another customer.

Sana stared at the number on the napkin along with an address.

Maybe it was time for her to face up to her problems.

'Get lost.' Was the only thing she said before slamming the door on Sana's face but the lady was quicker.

'No wait! Please, just hear me out! I'm sorry!' Sana pushed against the door with all her strength. Good thing she was wearing sneakers instead of heels.

'You said that six months ago. I think I heard enough.'

'Please, just give me one chance! One chance and I'll get out of your sight.' Sana begged and she almost fell to the floor when the resistance on the other side of the door vanished.

The apartment looked exactly the same as how Sana had remembered it but its owner was completely different. Her hair had changed from copper blonde to brown ombré and she appeared more stoic and cold.

'Sit.' She said but it sounded more like an order.

Sana slowly lowered herself onto the couch where they would often cuddle and fall asleep while watching movies.

Do not let your emotions overwhelm you, she reminded herself.

'Well? I'm listening. Get it over and done with.' She spat harshly. Her arms were crossed and she had tilted her body to slightly angle herself away from Sana.

'First, I would like to say I'm sorry.' Sana began and was immediately met with a scoff but the other girl did not say anything so she took it as a cue to continue.

'I know I made a lot of stupid mistakes back then. I had taken you for granted. I had taken your love for granted. I had just foolishly assumed that no matter what, you would always be there by my side. I didn't think of how you would feel when I would cancel our plans because of meetings and I didn't even bother apologizing after the first few times because I took your good nature for granted too.' Sana bit her lip and looked at the girl who remained emotionless and unmoving.

'I was so dense that I only began to realize how much you meant to me when you were gone. None of the promotions and salary raises can make up for your absence. None of the praises I got could make me feel as happy as I felt with you.' Sana's voice cracked, thick with emotion.

'I was told a few days ago that I might get another promotion but I wasn't even happy. I couldn't bring myself to even cheer. Instead I just wished that I can trade hat promotion in for you. I shouldn't have focused just on the future. I should have appreciated the present moments too. I was wrong to neglect you, wrong to have such severe tunnel-vision on the far future.' Sana sniffled.

'I miss us. The silly pillow fights, the movie nights, how we would fool around with each other. I don't expect you to come back to me but I just want you to know that I'm so sorry. So, so sorry.' Sana bowed her head to hide her tears that seemed to be flowing with no end.

The room was silent except for the sound of Sana's inconsistent intake of breath as she tried to muffle her cries with her hands. Her chest ached and her head ached but she deserved it anyway.

'I hate you.' Was the first thing the girl said and Sana felt like she was shot in the heart.

'I hate you so much.' She clenched her teeth and Sana could only nod.

'You made me fall for you, go crazy about you then you dropped me, left me alone for six ing months and now you come and drop this bull in my house?' The ombré haired girl seethed. 'Who do you think you are to do this to me? To play me like I was a toy?'

'I'm sorry.' Sana croaked, more tears streaming from her eyes. She definitely looked terrible now.

'You. I can't stand you.' The girl got up and walked away. Sana thought it was the end and she would have to walk herself out when the girl suddenly returned and sat down beside Sana on the couch.

'You and your irritating way with words.' She grumbled as she pried Sana's hands away from her face to reveal her wet and bloodshot eyes.

'You and your annoying face.' She dabbed the tears from Sana's eyes and wiped her leaking nose.

'I was supposed to stay angry at you. I was supposed to stay angry at you. After all you did to me.' She tossed the tissue into the trash and gave Sana a few more fresh pieces.

'I thought I could stay angry forever. But the moment I see your face, all my resolve crumbled. I hate you for having so much control over me and I hate myself for falling in love with you.'

'Mina..' Sana's voice wobbled and fresh tears slipped down her cheeks.

'I hate you so much that I love you.' Mina gently placed her hand on Sana's wet cheek.

'I'm sorry.' Sana sobbed again, this time burying her face in Mina's shoulder. The girl didn't push her away but began to rub her back in an attempt to sooth the sobbing lady.

'I don't deserve you. I really don't.' Sana mumbled after her cries died down.

'I'm glad you know that.'

'I won't make the same mistake again.'

'Who said you are still my girlfriend?' Mina asked and Sana almost burst into tears again if Mina didn't press a finger on her lips.

'I'm just joking. I know you won't. I can tell you've learnt your lesson.' Mina the girl's hair before leaning in for a kiss.

'I missed how your lips tasted like.' Sana shyly admitted.

'Now you can have it again.' Mina smiled.

'Did you still keep it?' Sana asked as she rested her head on Mina's lap.

'Hmm?'

'This.' Sana twisted the ring around her ring finger. 'I mean, it's perfectly fine if you tossed it away. I completely understand.' She sniffled.

'It's here.' Mina replied and pulled a chain out from inside her shirt.

'You still kept it.' Sana said in amazement and reached up to touch it.

'Of course. You turned me into a fool.'

'Should I be sorry for that?'

'No. No you shouldn't.'

'Someone looks happy today.' Sana's co-worker wiggled his eyebrow at her.

'Yeah yeah. Don't you have work to do?'

'I'm just taking a break from all that typing. I don't mind hearing a juicy story while I rest my fingers.'

'The only juicy thing will be your head when boss sees you slacking. Get to work, man.' Sana rolled her eyes before sitting down in her seat.

Today was a new day, and from today onwards, she would always have something to look forward to at the end of the day; getting home to spend time with her girlfriend.