“So, as you chose to get help almost in time, we want you to decide for yourself. Do you feel strong enough to be transferred into the open clinic or would you rather stay here at the closed one for the time being. The only relevant difference is that you can leave from the open clinic more easy but most therapies and other activities are quite similar.”, the psychologist sitting opposite to me, explained.
I looked to my side trying to figure out what my parents thought, but I could only see the worry and stress, evident on their faces.

After I had out the other day, a doctor had decided to call my parents over and explain the situation. Not that it was necessary, as I was actually an adult already, having turned 18 over one and a half year ago. But after seeing my medical records it must have seemed like the best thing to do as I was still unconscious and couldn’t give any information myself. Still.. Waking up to your crying mother and an anxious and worried father really . Especially when all you worried about over the last days and weeks was actually, to not worry your parents…

In the end it was always the same. I would do what my parents wanted me to do, or if they didn’t say anything, what I thought they would want me to do. And as an open clinic was for the patients with mental issues not as ‘serious’ as the ones treated at the closed departments, I decided to stay at the open clinic. Hoping it would convey a feeling of my ‘accident’ being not too serious so my parents could stop worrying. That was really all I cared about at that time. Not to worry others and not being a nuisance to them.

Maybe these kinds of thoughts and their similarity to his ones were, what first created that kind of connection between us. Maybe it was just our love for music. And maybe it was just coincidence and two lost hearts looking for a fellow to share their burden with. But now that I think about it, I don’t care what it was. I am just thankful as I still can’t believe how sometimes, in our darkest hours, a single (gummy) smile, or friendly word can change everything. And I can only hope that as much as he helped me, I was able to help him.
As I will keep the memories of shared tears and smiles, of invisible wars fought together, sunlit days and lightless nights spent in each other’s secure embrace, dear to my heart, I hope he will do the same and someday we might be able to look back to these dark days and can just see the good, the light and the warmth it gave to us and maybe, just maybe we can be thankful for this time and the lessons it taught us.

_____

I hope you like this next part as well!! I am really happy that you seem to like this story!! I never expected to have any subscribers. Especially not after the first upload. i hope it's not too long without any Yongguk.. I promise he will appear more from now on! And again please excuse any mistakes, english is not my first language.. Also I got sick and can't concentrate too well so I am not sure when I will be able to upload again. But it will be next week for sure!! So have a nice weekend and stay healthy (unlike me -.-') ~