“Oh man this is hard. Harder than I thought it would be. “

Time struck 11.15 pm when she got home. Tired as it is , she left her bags at shoe rack. Turn on the lights, she stood there quietly looked at her living room with her cute mongness. One push  the curtains that closed the windows while she was away opened gracefully showing the magnificent city view from the top floor. With puffy eyes, she was sniffing and make herself a cup of coffee.

She brought the coffee to the windows and sat on the floor facing it. She sip on it quietly while reminiscing the day.
Today was devastating. Probably the hardest day of herlife on entertainment bussiness. She knew this day will come. She knew because everything had been discussed and prepared. But when the day were actually arrived suddenly she regrets it all and wanted to take it back. Her chest were litterally in pain. She thought the coffee will help her ease the suffocating feeling but it couldn’t.
So she put the cup away and lay silently on the floor still facing the view. She closed her eyes but not sleeping. She was waiting.

...

The click sound from the door signalling someone was entering the appartment. She smiled while still closing her eyes. The heavy step accompanied by heavy breathing approaching her. But she was nowhere to be seen because the couch blocked her from the sight.

"Jihyo-ah" he whispered.
"Oppa" She answered and sat right up. She wait till he comes.

Gary walked slowly and found her behind the couch already looking up at him. Still with puffy eyes but now also with messy hair. He put down her bag that she left at the front and go down at her level. Jihyo's eyes followed his movement. His eyes was red.

Gently he her cheeks and found out that she was no longer crying. They looked into each other’s eyes intensely and without speaking she understand. Now it's his time to cry.

Tear beads fell one by one. He was squirming but not the one he made when he joked. This one looked really painful.
She pulled him instantly and hug him really tight. He didn't make a sound when he cry and that sounds more cruciating. Without her knowing she was, too, crying again. Feeling his pain. Feeling his lost. Feeling the heaviness of what they just lost.
He fell into her lap and continue sobbing. He was never a cry baby but this time he didn't want to held it up. He got her. He got her stood by him.

"I never thought will be this hard Jihyo-ah" he said with a broken voice. "I knew this was going to be difficult but not this way. How come I took this decision? How dare I let everyone down?". Seeing and hear him say that pain her the most.
"You didn't oppa." She comforts him. She his hair and kissed his head. "You did not let anyone down. This is the best for us. They're all understand. " She lied. Not everyone understand.
The Oct 31st will probably the most memorable day for them. For Running Man. For monday couple and all their fans around the world. The date where Monday couple born and end.
How ironic is it?.

...

They cried till no more tears left on their eyes. Both of their eyes swollen like melon and their noses red as cherry. Gary still lying peacefully on her lap and Jihyo keep his hair. Both gazing through the window see the world. Their sleeves and Jihyo's jeans was wet because they wont wipe the tears. So they just let it flow.
Crying together is better than crying alone. They used to be crying alone. Back in the days when they knew they love each other but couldn't do nothing to be together. Both are suffered because of the fate made them meet in the same place but that very same place prevent them to be with each other. Again. how ironic.

That was when Jihyo took a step. She wanted to be happy. She needed to be happy. And be in his arms is the happiest place she could ever wish for.

Gary felt the same way but he was torn between the show and Jihyo. Both are the most precious treasure for him. He was affraid if they ever go out and something go wrong,one of them will need to leave the show. The love for her keep him going but also killing him slowly. He wanted to be happy. He needed to be happy. And make her happy is the only way it is.

When Jihyo finally took his hands and confessed was unforgettable.
"Why are you the one who confess? That should be me babo ya" He said with tears on the edge. Hold her close, suddenly felt that all his worry and fear all this time were nothing and wondered why he was such a fool. He felt too coward to say anything to her. To say that everything he said on the early episodes was real and came from his very heart. Every word of it.

"You already did oppa" She cried in his arms. "Six years ago".

...

So there they was. Dating while filming. A crime maybe but nobody knows. Until HaHa asked them directly in front of everybody on one of the episodes. He asked out of curiosity and Gary answered jokingly. But he knew his hyung. After filming he pulled him when nobody see them.

“I know hyung. Do not try to hide it”

Gary and Jihyo knew they can’t hide it for too long. One night after filming they admit the truth. No surprise. They all knew this day will come. Even Jae Suk who always professional told them to go on and live happily ever after. They can’t thankful enough for the family they got there.

Months passed. They keep getting stronger and stronger. The bonding they have seemed cannot be replaced with anything. They knew they meant for each other.
But he had one more thing in mind.

Music.

He seemed to struggled with time for Running man, his singing career and Jihyo. The job on entertaiment show make him lose his focus on what he really did for living. Music. He need more time to make music. To write and produce good music takes so much energy and time. And this year is when everything becomes too much.

Jihyo notice that and she tried to support him any way possible. Untill he came with an conclussion that triggered their first argument as a couple.

Gary love the way things going but sometimes it was getting out of hand. His passion on making music never dyed out but the time and circumstances did not let it burn. He needed to refocus and the only way to do it is to let go the one he holds dear.

Running Man.

Gary hated how things will turned out. It was the best six years of his life. After all this time he couldn't just let go that easily. That was the place he met her. That was the place he met his family now and after (with Jihyo). This was not easy. His life was never easy.

Her beautiful eyes turned round and her face looked pale when she heard him. She was  speechless. They argued at first and she tried to make him reconsider but Gary was dead serious. She couldn't imagine Running Man without Kang Gary. Nobody could. But she loved him, that's why she supported him. Whatever comes they will face it together.

That was the hardest decision. And nobody knows except for them. Because it will sounds like the desicion was made out of selfishness. It probably is, but they already put everyone before themselves for six long years. So they keep quiet until Gary ready to tell the production.
The other member were shock by his sudden decision. Directors and the other members pursued him to stay. But they all know his passion for music.

He was sorry for the fans. He truly was. The postings from SNS was breaking his heart. They stopping him. Try to change his mind. He was losing it all this time but he knew he needed to be strong. Like Jae Suk said

"We can't play on the same playground forever"

Gary and Jihyo prepared for the worst at the final day. Mentally and physicly. She determined not to cry at the last filming. She will still see him after all. But the heaviness on the air overcome her. The atmosphere on the set were so overwhelming and make all of them tearful. Gary did his last mission with strong heart and determination. He tried his very best for the very last time.

Holding his tears feels exactly like holding his breath. It was so hard and painful. Yoo Jae Suk, Ji Suk Jin, Kim Jong Kook, Haha and Kwang Soo tried to put their best smile at the last recording. All of them hate to see him go. Fans out there waiting for them for the last good bye. After this there will be no more goodbyes.

Gary was already on the edge when he read the letters from the other members. Without anyone notice Jihyo hold his hands to soothe him.

"Smile oppa" Jihyo said. "You can do it"

He put his best effort for the fans. Until it ends he keep apologizing for his departure. At least his heart was ready to take it all in, remember Jihyo will console him later.
Last picture was incredible. Gary promised to still give the best wherever he goes. He even still threw a fit of laughter by saying they all will be invited on his wedding with Jihyo.
The best part of his life had end that night. But his new journey with Jihyo will begin at that very moment. At the 6th anniversary of their so called bussiness couple, they took a new step towards the new future as a real couple in front the whole world.

...

Both of them now laying on the floor with Gary spooned on Jihyo.

"When will you ready to tell the world oppa? Jihyo broke the silence.
"I don't know, when do you think?"
"Oppa, jongmal.."
Gary chukled and inhaled her scent, holding her closer from the back. Jihyo closed her eyes feeling the moment and turned around facing him. His eyes now so swollen too. Jihyo let the soft laughter and touch his face.

"Stay here" she whispered. Gary nodded and kissed her.
"But I prefer bed than this cold tiles". She laughed

They both laughing out loud on that cold floor where they just cried like babies. That night felt so long. That night they mend their broken hearts by the presence of one another. Held each other till no more gap between them and let the time flew past their old selfes, begin their new chapter together. Unseperable.

*This is my other version of "After".I know I already made the last one "completed" because I thought I won't continue but your feedbacks were more than I expected. I was planning to post this a little bit later but the sadness overcome me like waves. I'm sorry if it sounds too cheesy. I need to let it out of my system. Thank you for reading and enjoy our very last ride with Gary. FIGHTING!!
*And please bare with my grammar.