-POV of Seungcheol-

To wake up seeing dad and Jeonghan together, reminded me of the time back in middle school when I broke my leg during a soccer match. I can still remember clearly how the paramedics carried me on their stretcher and took me to the hospital. It was the day I thought I would last play soccer. I felt very sad, but Jeonghan was right beside me, holding my hand and rubbing circles as the paramedics made sure I don’t worsen it.

During that period, Jeonghan felt like a family member, he was merely on their house, he spent more time looking after me, making sure I eat well, teaching me the latest topics in class. We played video games, ate snacks and cuddled up. But this time, no cuddling, just Jeonghan being here.

“Jeonghan, tell me, why did you leave me?” I’ve asked him the first question that popped into my mind when I saw him in the subway. He looked at me, his pupils shaking, was he nervous?

“Seungcheol, you need to rest”

“Then go away, I don’t need you here, go to Jisoo”

“Seungcheol, stop”

“Stop what?” I felt a little mad, why is he being like this when he couldn’t even save my number.

He shrugged, playing with his fingers. “I’m sorry for leaving, I’m sorry for not saying anything, I’m sorry that you have to cross paths with me again, I swear to God, I mever wanted it to turn out this way” he apologized, tears slowly escaping his eyes. I might seem mad but I still care, although a bit dizzy, I sat up and wiped his cheeks.

“Don’t cry, I’m sorry”

“It’s my fault Cheolie” my inner self was celebrating, he called me the pet name he made.

“Jeonghan, please, just tell me why and I won’t bother you, tell me why and I’ll leave you alone”

“No, I don’t want you to leave me”

“Jeonghan wake up, you can’t have me and Jisoo at the same time”

“Why can’t I?”

“You can’t sail on two rivers at the same time”

He huffed his cheeks, pouting and wiping his eyes. “I-I left because we moved to Seoul, I was a coward Cheolie, I thought leaving you like that will hurt less than continuing our relationship while miles away” he explained, sniffing and squeezing his thighs. So that was it, he just didn’t want to continue a long distance relationship. As much as I wanted to punch him and call him an idiot, I was wrong too. I was a coward too. I didn’t dare look for him, even on SNS, I shut my world away from people, I didn’t try hard enough.

“Is he better than me?” I asked him

“Cheol, I can’t compare the two of you”

“Jeonghan, tell my heart to stop beating for you, it hurts so much Hanie” I looked at him, I couldn’t stop my tears, all the emotions I worked hard to bottle up came exploding.

“Cheol, I’m so sorry” what hurts most was he hugged me.

“My Cheolie, my Cheolie, shh” he rubbed circles on my back, I wrapped my arms around him tightly.

We stayed like that. God knows how much I’ve been longing for this hug. It felt like home, Jeonghan always felt like home. I’m a lost pup and I finally found m