Hurt.

That was what Joohyun felt when she saw Seulgi was talking to another girl. She felt betrayed—mostly sad— because she thought Seulgi said that she loved her like she did. She might have a mental illness, but Joohyun could remember the thing that precious to her, and that included Seulgi.

She kept her pace fast, even when Seulgi didn’t stop to call her. Until finally, the latter’s warm hand grabbed her wrist.

“I only look at you, okay?”

That was when Joohyun broke down into tears.

“Why are you crying, Hyun…Oh my God.” She heard Seulgi said.

She did not actually know why she cried at that moment, it was just suddenly her mind was thinking about something else that she disliked the most.

She was afraid.

Afraid that Seulgi would leave her for another girl that prettier than her—that a lot more normal than her.

Flashback.

Joohyun was playing with her favorite bear doll—because it was from Seulgi—, she was sitting on the floor, with her parents sitting on the couch, happily watching her.

She turned her back to see both of her parents were smiling at her.

“When Joohyun grow up, Joohyun wants to be with Seulgi,” she blurted out.

And from the corner of her eyes, she witnessed her parents’ smile slowly disappeared. She was not sure why, but she just followed when her mother bent down right next to her and led her to sit on the couch between both of her parents.

Her mother gently combed Joohyun’s hair with her hands.

“Joohyun…” She hated that tone. Her mother always used that tone whenever she had bad news for her. That tone sounded so dry, and Joohyun hated it so much.

“Seulgi is not like you,” and there it was. Joohyun knew where it would lead. But she busied herself with the doll, unconsciously clenched on it.

Her father caressed her hair, giving her a gentle smile that full of concern. Her father did not talk much, but she always knew exactly what inside his mind.

With a trembling voice, she replied.

“Are you saying that Joohyun can’t be with Seulgi? Even when Joohyun becomes an adult?”

Her father sighed.

“My dear Joohyun…You’re already an adult.”

She knew.

Joohyun was aware of it. She just did not know why her brain didn’t seem to get it. She was confused. Her clench was going tighter around the doll. She also didn’t know when,