PART 12

You know, it applies to everyone, that when something too good happens to you, your brain immediately doubts it and refuses to believe. Not many beautiful things happen to me, or ever goes my way. That’s maybe why I’m standing right here, staring at a white wall still trying to process everything.  People were buzzing around the place but it felt like my brain retired and abandoned the cavity of my head. A certain spot on my cheek was still tingling and burning though and I don’t think I ever want to wash my face ever again after getting kissed by Kim Taeyeon.

“Hey?” A voice said ever softly and I wondered how many times had she been calling me before I’ve finally noticed.

“Y-yes?” It was still too unrealistic for me to take in as I turn my head to face Taeyeon, her eyebrows knitted together into something I can’t really understand. Since when have I ever understood her anyways?

“Are you ok?” Her eyes studied mine intently and her lips were pressed together in a grim manner.

“Are you not happy?” After some delay, she spoke again, worry dripping from every word.

“No, that’s not it!” I answered almost immediately. I was happy. I was so happy there were no words that can ever describe how I’m feeling right now.

“It’s just,” My hands brought the glass of orange juice to my lips. “This is still hard for me to believe.”

“Does that mean I did well in surprising you?” I shyly glanced her way and nod.

“It’s just…you’re not pranking me or anything?”

Taeyeon’s eyes widened a fraction but she was quick to hide it.

“No. How can you say that? I’m not that type of person.” She was right. I should’ve known better than to ask such stupid questions.

“I really do like you. I know I’ve said some things before that might make you think otherwise but please forget about it.” She sighed.

The tip of my ears turned pink again and as a reflex, my eyes casted down onto the marbled floor to hide a smile that was blooming on my face.

“Ok…” Once again, my voice was high-pitched. My fingers went down to straighten my dress for no particular reason and I picked my head back up to peek at Taeyeon. My eyes darted away from her when I noticed she was still having her eyes on me.

“W-why are you staring at me like that?” My mouth rambled as I felt her stare burn a hole into the side of my face. I began to walk around the place and I could hear her footsteps behind me. I can’t stay long with Taeyeon. My heart will die.

“Why? Why can’t I stare at my girlfriend?”

“H-huh?” I answered, flustered at what she just said. My face turned from pink to red in a second.

“What? Aren’t you my girlfriend?” She chuckled lightly and I didn’t have the guts to face her. I drank some more from the glass in my hand, praying my blush will go away soon.

“Oh look you’re blushing!” Like adding fire to the fuel, she blurted out and my huge eyes glanced at her to see that she was suppressing a smile.

My teeth clamped on my bottom lip as I just stayed silent. It’s not fair how she can read me like an open book and are aware of my weak spots.

“I’m not!” I was clinging onto the last string of my reputation and Taeyeon simply laughed at my futile protest. Her laugh was short but it only aggravated the blushing mess I was stuck in.

“I’m sorry I was just joking.” Her lips pulled up into a dainty smile and she pulled me to go see another set of the display.

For the rest of the time, Taeyeon never once left my side and we stopped in almost every piece, with her being my personal guide, giving the backstory of every single painting. I found out she’s been into this field since a toddler and basically a child prodigy – which she rejects again.

“I’m not a child prodigy or that talented as everybody thinks.” She leaned forward to inspect a painting of a lotus and blinked. Her hands were held behind her back as her head tilted.

I watched what she was doing.

“It takes a lot of practice. It takes a lot of practice and commitment to get where I am today.” She finished off.

“I see...” She flashed a smile at my way and her gaze went down to my empty glass.

“Do you want more?” She was just too caring in so many ways.

“I’m ok.” Shaking my head lightly, I noticed we were back at a certain place.

“What do you think of this?” She hesitantly asked and her twinkling eyes washed over me.

My head gazed up to myself hanging from the wall and it did feel awkward staring at this with Taeyeon.

“I love it.” It was simply three words but it made her smile and her orbs lightened up.

“You have no idea how excited I was for today.” A dreamy smile made its way onto her face and I watched her closely as she turned and our eyes met.

“I couldn’t wait for you to see it.”

Tiny subtle butterflies awoken from a deep sleep and fluttered in my tummy.

“I’m glad you love it.”

A huge smile broke out across my face and I partially wanted to break down into horrendous wails and tears of glee.

-

The ride back home was relatively pleasant. It seems like I’ve seen a different side of Taeyeon. The whole car ride, she was quite talkative and well, I could see it in her eyes, she was happy. The way her eyes kept flicking towards me and how she was much more animated. Perhaps she was trying to get me out of my comfort zone because well, I was still tense and rigid like a ing rock. Although well, I am a little relaxed now.

“And there was this time when she kissed my cheek and smeared chocolate all over my face.”

Another new thing I’ve learned about Taeyeon was that she was very fond of kids. Exactly the opposite of me. I can’t help it. Kids, they just hate me.

I normally do dislike kids and well, any topics related to them but now that Taeyeon was telling me about her 7-year old niece, I didn’t mind at all. I actually find it rather adorable.

“Can I see her sometimes?” I asked and immediately, she pulled out her phone and there was a picture of her niece and her as her lock screen. I held her phone in my hand and instead of glancing at the little girl; my eyes were glued to the Taeyeon that was in the picture instead. Her golden locks were only by her shoulder and her cheeks were marred with chocolate as she grinned into the camera.

“Isn’t she cute?” I glanced at Taeyeon and chuckled nervously.

“Yes.” I answered although I haven’t spared a glance to Taeyeon’s niece yet. It was then that I ripped my eyes from Taeyeon and paid attention to the tiny kid that was also equally grinning into the camera. Her rosy cheeks were smeared with chocolate just like Taeyeon and her huge clear azure eyes were staring at the camera widely. Her thick eyebrows looked perfect and her short curly black hair came spiraling down in beautiful curls. Topping her head was a Mickey Mouse bonnet that I used to have one too when I was young.

“She’s beautiful and her eyes are so blue.” I knew why Taeyeon was so fond of this little girl.

“And very smart too. Her dad’s German.” I could feel Taeyeon throw a glance towards me. So that explains the exotic bright blue irises.

“She loves going to school and she would call me almost every night to recite her twinkle twinkle little star.”

“That’s so sweet.” I smiled faintly and was caught off a guard when Taeyeon asked me, “Would you like to meet her?”

I jerked in surprise as I processed the question. Meet her? Then Taeyeon will know how terrible I am dealing with kids.

“I’m not good with kids.” My eyes casted down to my knees and my cheeks heated up lightly.

“That’s ok. I’m sure she will love you.”

They always say that but the minute I get there, things turn 180 degrees.

“Um…I don’t know…” My eyes darted to my unattended right hand when I felt Taeyeon’s hand had shifted and wrapped her fingers around mine. My heart went on another beating spree as my whole body tense up.

“Don’t worry. I will make her love you, if I have to. Let’s meet her this Tuesday.” I didn’t pay attention to her words. All I knew was our hands were touching. Her hands were burning against my skin and I tried to be as normal as I can.

“Ok.” I gulped.

Taeyeon smiled a little and her fingers squeezed my hand lightly. Oh my heart.

“…Are you happy?” She was looking straight ahead, and her face no showed no expression.

“Yes I am.” I retorted without any hesitance.

“Really? You don’t look like it.” She mumbled and my eyebrows furrowed defiantly.

“I am!” My voice slightly went up in determination to prove her wrong. I kept my eyes on her and she stayed silent before she let out a small laugh.

“Ok I believe you.”

I couldn’t really think properly with her thumb caressing my hand from time to time, her touch feathery and light. I still couldn’t believe everything.

“So…” That came out breathy and shaky.

“Hm?” She hummed and I took a deep breath.

“We are dating?” I felt stupid for asking such questions but my guts wanted a second confirmation.

“Yes.” I instantly blushed. Her answer was so casual and I envied her for never turning into a blushing-stuttering mess like me.

I stayed silent, not knowing how to answer to that.

“Why? Do you still think I’m joking?”

“Yes.” I answered deliberately and shot her a cautious glance. Is she going to get mad?

She hummed and I waited for her to reply but she only stared out at the road, her thumb stopped moving against my skin. Panic began to seep in, thinking I just made her upset.

Her hand shifted from my hand and for a moment, I dreadfully thought she was going to pull away but she was just only repositioning her hand to lie on top of mine.

Silence.

“How do you want me to prove? Should I kiss you again right now?” She finally said and I almost choked on air.

My eyes widened and my heart gradually gained speed.

“W-what?” That was insanely high-pitched. I was aware of my face and ears being on fire.

“You don’t believe me don’t you?”

My heart gripped tighter when she slowed the car to a stop at the side of the road and turned her full attention to me, her arm propped lazily on the steering wheel.

I scrambled for words but failed horribly. Oh my gosh.

“I…” I trailed off and tried hard to maintain our eye contact. Her brown eyes were staring a little too intently for my liking. Her eyebrows quirked up, waiting for my reply.

.

“I…uh…” I would love to be kissed by you again, was what I wanted to say but hell right I can totally say that with my microscopic guts.

“No. No it’s ok.” I finally sighed and broke the eye contact. The cool air hit my hot face and I brought my eyes to my hands. I could still sense her gaze on my face and I was praying for my blush to go away, and my heart to obey and be like any others.

It was after a moment that the car finally functioned and the silence between us just got bigger and bigger. From the corner of my eyes, Taeyeon kept flicking her eyes to me or maybe it was just my hallucination. The rest of the ride, my mind wandered and drew out the possible outcome if I were to let her prove herself. It’s not like I can ever ask for it anyways, so it’s better to just not regret.

The silence was tense and strange and I wished I could read what was going through Taeyeon’s mind.

It felt like it was my fault for bringing her mood down. I wanted to apologize and break the silence but due to too much debating and contemplation, it was too late.

“I’ll walk you to the porch.” She unbuckled her seatbelt and that was all she said before she opened the door and I did the same.

My lips squeezed together in a thin line as I gripped my purse and walked to the door with Taeyeon beside me.

“Thank you for bringing me back home.” My voice was small and I bravely lifted my eyes to her level. I bit my lip hard when I felt her eyes were pinning me down again. Her way of looking made me feel almost , exposed and vulnerable. I waited for her to say something but her lips never moved and so, we just stood there, an arm length away from each other.

My ears caught a tiny sigh slipping from her and before I knew it, she had leaned forward, pressing her lips to my forehead.

Her vanilla scent washed over me and before the whole thing can sink through my frozen brain, she had already pulled away.

“I really do like you.” Her voice was so gentle; almost a whisper and I do believe her. My eyes stared at her. A small smile painted on her face.

 My forehead was searing uncontrollably.

“You’re blushing again.” Her teeth bit on her bottom lip to suppress a smile and I didn’t know what to do but bring my head down.

A melodic giggle came from her.

“So cute.” She said and that made my insides crazy. Holy .

“Look at me.” Her face leaned down trying to see my face and I reluctantly showed her my flaming face.

Her big eyes took in my face and soon, they smiled lovingly.

“Can I have your number?” I looked at the phone that was loosely held in her hand.

“S-sure.” My fingers typed in my phone number shakily and I managed to give it back to her without dropping it.

“Thank you and have a very good night.” She began to turn around and walk off but to only stop and turn back.

“Girlfriend.” She added and winked.

-

My eyes fluttered open at the sounds of rain beating lightly on the roof. Outside the window, the sky was dark grey and the glass rattled lightly from the impact of tiny but powerful raindrops.

I reached for my phone, almost like a reflex and moaned at the time. It was 7 in the morning although the sky outside said otherwise. I was absolutely not ready to leave the confines of my bed. It was partially my fault though, staying up last night to replay certain scenes over and over again in my head.

My lips smiled a little as I went through the chat I had with Taeyeon last night; the only evidence to proof last night was not a dream.

I read every message twice and soon, a grin was straining to rip my face apart.

“Hahaha oh my ing gosh.” I pressed my forearm hard onto my eyes and laughed some more.

I put on a straight face but to only giggle uncontrollably again.

“I’m turning crazy.”

I sent her a good morning text, after much consideration and left the comfort of my mattress to shower.

I usually hate Monday mornings but I’m looking forward to telling everything to Jessica.

-

Remember when I said I was looking forward to today? As I stare at my sheets dripping with water, I take what I said back.

My index finger and my thumb pinched the tip of the paper as a look of horror marked my face.

“ no.” I groaned as I stared hopelessly at my drenched assignment. A few of papers had slip out of my folder and manage to have a perfect landing on a puddle, made from the heavy rain earlier.

I stood and looked around at the campus bitterly. Such a wonderful way to start the day.

“Woah someone’s busy.” I didn’t bother to greet Jessica as she dropped her bag onto the table with a thud and sat beside me.

I gave out a grunt as I touched the pieces of paper I had arranged on my table to dry out. It was my sketch I had to do for a class and the teacher will roast me for sure. There goes 30% of my grade. Down the drain and shoved out into the depths of the sea. Never coming back.

When Jessica saw clearly what I was doing, she laughed and I glared at her.

“Shut up and help!” I threw a book to Jessica.

“Help me flap.” I continued flapping the book I was holding over the soaked papers.

“Ew no way.” She flicked the book to me. “I’m here to hear about what happened last night.”

My nose cringed at her Cheshire grin. This girl deserves a beating with a cactus.

“I’ll tell you when I’m done with this.” I said simply and I ignored her icy glare.

“I want to hear it now.”

“Well too bad.”

“Tiff.”

“Jess.”

She growled.

“Stop. You’re not a dog.”

“I’ll rip your assignments into pieces.”

I stared at her.

“You’re not serious.” How old was this girl?

“Oh yes I will.” She bared her teeth and went for my precious papers but I managed to hold her back.

“Ok OK! For ’s sake!” I screamed earning a few looks from the other students.

“I hate how things always go your way.” I huffed and smoothed out my blouse.

“Can you tell me now?”

“Be patient!”

“I’ll rip-“

“I’m telling!”

I stared in horror at the devil beside me. She’s turning crazier every day.

“Well,” I paused and raised my eyebrow at her daunting expression.

“Don’t give me that look.” I hissed but she only rolled her eyes in response.

“Well she invited me to her art gallery ope-“

“I already know that part! You told me that already! Skip!” She barked and I gave her the wtf look.

“She painted me.” I said shortly and laughed at Jessica’s priceless expression.

“She confessed and now, we are dating.” Saying that out into the opening and admitting it again, I couldn’t help but blush a little.

“Your eyes are going to roll onto the floor.” I commented and snickered at how wide Jessica’s eyes were.

“No WAY!” There comes her siren-like voice and I only laughed harder at her huge reaction.

“Tiffany don’t lie to me!” She flailed her arms and I was laughing louder and harder by the second.

“I’m not lying!” I managed to say between laughs. And for the rest of the period, I didn’t get to listen to any of the lecture because of Jessica bugging me every minute trying to squeeze out every little detail. Not that I mind. I enjoy talking about Taeyeon.

-

The last time I saw Taehyung was just a few days ago but it felt like ages. And it even felt longer since the time he discovered his sister’s photos sprawled all across the floor. Many things had happened since that day and we never talked since then aside from seeing each other from afar.

I didn’t know what got into me but as I caught sight of him from the distance, my mouth acted faster than my brain.

“Taehyung!” Almost instantly, his head whipped to me in response to his name.

His face portrayed surprise as I forced myself to walk to him, every step getting heavier and heavier.

“Taehyung.” I looked up to match his eyes. I sighed.

“Hi…” He said and it was more awkward than I thought it would be.

“Can we talk?” I chewed on my bottom and he glanced at his friends that were a few feet before him.

“Sure.” He gave me a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. They used to always do.

-

“What did you want to talk about?” He pushed his hands into his jeans and sat down onto the wooden bench in the school’s garden. My feet remained rooted on the ground.

“I just want to apologize…I mean…” I couldn’t really make my thoughts turn into words so I finished it off with a sigh.

“I don’t want us to be like this.” I mumbled, hoping he understood what I was trying to say. Taehyung sighed and I waited for him to say something.

“I know. I know and I’m sorry too. It was just too much for me to take in, you know? Like I didn’t expect it, you know?” From his tone and use of words, I could tell her was frustrated and my heart clenched at the sight of his desperate eyes.

“I’m sorry.” It was all I can say. I didn’t know what to do. I never planned for things to turn out this way at all.

“It’s alright. I understand.” He ran a hand through his hair and abruptly stood up.

“Still friends?” I inspected his hand that was held out, waiting for me to shake.

My lips quirked up and I instantly reached for his hand.

“Friends.” He smiled and again, it didn’t reach his eyes.

“I need to go now. B-ball practice.” He fixed his bag and I called out after him.

“Yea?”

“Thank you.” I said and his eyebrow knitted in confusion.

“For not telling Taeyeon…” I answered him and he only nodded, a faint smile gracing his lips.

“See you later?” He asked and I nodded. Well, that wasn’t that bad.

-

The ice cream shop was tiny and empty, except for a lone lady sitting at the corner of the place. I was supposed to meet Taeyeon’s niece today.

In my hand, was a Mickey Mouse I had stopped on my way here to buy. Let’s pray she likes Mickey Mouse. I went into safari and my fingers clicked on the screen.

How to make a kid like you?

I read it again and tapped the search button.

“This is stupid.” I muttered under my breath but my eyes were scanning through the various webpages that popped up anyways. I clicked on one and read through the 11 steps of making a kid like you.

They were ridiculous and basically very obvious advices and soon after that, I went off Google.

“Please like me.” I said a small prayer and eyed the doll I was gripping lightly.

“Don’t let me down Mickey.”

My neck whipped so hard to the door when the bell rang, indicating there’s a customer. I calmed down. It was just a teenage boy.

I was sweating and the thought of seeing Taeyeon again was also adding to my nervousness, despite us being…girlfriends. Gosh I want to giggle like no tomorrow at the mention of that.

My eyes followed the teenage boy who was by the counter, picking his favorite flavor. He’s lame. You know why? Because he doesn’t know how lucky I am. Like bruh, I am Kim Taeyeon’s girlfriend! Ok maybe I’m quite ridiculous.

Thinking about it in an ice-cream shop was quite eccentric but I wanted to tell everyone. I don’t care whether they know or don’t know who the hell Taeyeon is but I want to go up and announce into their face Kim Taeyeon is my girlfriend.

I want to publish it into magazines and newspapers as well as webpages. I wanted the world to know. I wanted everyone to be aware that Kim Taeyeon belongs to me.

My fantasy ended short after the bell jiggled again and soon came Taeyeon with a little girl by her side. The staffs stared at Taeyeon and I couldn’t help but smile.

Ya’ll be drooling and be jealous because she’s mine.

I really want to slap myself for my conceited thoughts. I’m really going nuts.

As Taeyeon get closer, it finally soaked in that her niece was here and horror fell upon me. I gazed at the puny doll-like kid as she held onto Taeyeon’s hand. That pink dress just adds to the cuteness.

My shoulders were tense and I must’ve looked constipated again. I made eye contact with those blue alluring irises and she stared wide at me.

Smile. ing smile Tiffany. But none of my facial muscles moved. my life. But then, I almost fell off my seat when her eyes turned into crescents and a toothy grin was sent my way.

This kid was so cute I can’t oh my gosh.

Automatically, I gave her my best grin hoping it didn’t look forced, or frightening.

“Hi.” Taeyeon greeted and smiled, melting my heart. She looked so hot today. Well, everyday anyways.

“Say hi Alessa.” She looked down to the adorable kid and I followed her gaze.

“Hi.” Her voice was small and she waved a tiny hand at me.

“HIIII.” was that too energetic? I hope not.

Taeyeon who was watching the interaction only chuckled and placed a seat down next to me. Well I don’t think I have to mention this but yes, my heart was overreacting again. Doesn’t it always do?

“Have you been waiting for long?” She asked and I shook my head. Alessa was staring at me with her bright blinding eyes as she placed herself on Taeyeon’s lap. The sight was so cute.

“I’ll go order. What flavor do you want?” I returned my attention back to Taeyeon.

“Y-yes? Oh uh…rum and raisin.” I said.

“And you princess?” She asked Alessa and I pouted mentally. I wanted to be called that too. Ok I was being immature.

“Chocolate!” Alessa squealed and I watched as Taeyeon got up and left the table. I peeked at the little girl beside me and scrambled for something to say.

“Hello.” Why did she have to leave me alone with Alessa?

“Are you Aunt Tiffany?” She asked and I nodded. Feeling brave, I shot out a hand and tucked a loose strand of dark hair behind her ear. She didn’t push me away, spit saliva on me nor bite me. s going well so far.

“Yes.” I returned my hand back and placed it on my lap.

“Aunt Tae was talking about you the whole time on our way here.”

“Really?” My lips lifted up and I gazed at Taeyeon’s back view that was by the counter.

“And what did she say?” I asked softly and watched as Alessa jutted her lips out. Her red cheeks puffed out as she was probably trying to remember things.

“She said I was going to meet the greatest person in the world and that she has a really pretty smile.” Alessa announced proudly and my tummy did somersaults. My eyes flicked to Taeyeon again. Did she really say all those things?

“Is that so?” I combed her hair softly with my fingers.

“And-and she said-“

“Here’s your ice-cream!!” Taeyeon came back with a grin and handed us our ice-cream.

“What were you guys talking about?” She looked from me to Alessa and I stayed silent.

“About you!” Alessa said and I faced away to cover my blush.

“Really? About me?”

“Yes! About how you were saying Aunt Tiffany is the greatest and prettiest-“

“H-hah?! Alessa shhhh.” She immediately covered her niece’s mouth and it was her turn to blush. I giggled when her ears heated up.

“Don’t listen to her.” Taeyeon said and she was flustered. I could tell from her tone.

“It’s true!” Alessa’s muffled voice escaped Taeyeon’s palm and Taeyeon pulled her hand away when Alessa her palm.

“She also said-“

“Alessa eat your ice-cream. It’s melting!” Taeyeon brought the cup to her niece and I couldn’t help but stifled a laugh. I really wonder what else she said but Alessa was already busy eating her dessert.

“Sorry.” Taeyeon gave me a sheepish smile and I only nod, returning her smile. The rest of the meeting went exceptionally well and that was the first time ever in my life that I got along with a young person.

My heart burst when Alessa squealed as I handed her my little gift. Taeyeon was right. She was mature for her age and also intelligent. I listened to her reciting her twinkle twinkle little star and admired Taeyeon’s proud expression.

Soon, it was time for Alessa to go and I watched how Alessa climbed into the car and Taeyeon shut the door before turning around to face me.

“See? You actually are good with kids.” She commented, her lips lifting up.

“Well, this is the first time I got along with kids.” I admitted and noticed how Alessa’s ear was pressed onto the window probably trying to eavesdrop.

“I can tell Alessa really likes you.”

“And I like her too.” I wanted to ask her whether she really told Alessa all those things but sorry, my guts were nowhere to be found.

“Um…well…” We both turned to the window of the car when Alessa knocked on it, her face looking impatient.

“I got to go, I guess.” Taeyeon chuckled and I did the same.

“See you tomorrow?” I asked and she nodded, sending me her attractive grin.

-

I walked out of my bathroom with my pjs as I collapsed onto my bed, the soft mattress swallowing me. I wiggled to get under the covers and grabbed a pillow to press against my chest. It feels so nice to be in bed, under my thick duvets and smelling the familiar scent of myself.

I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and turned off the lights, leaving only the lamp on. I then yelped when I saw a message from Taeyeon.

Hey.

It was just hey but my mood did drastic changes.

Hello!

I typed back and waited for her reply.

Today was fun.

She couldn’t see me that, I was fully aware but I nodded anyways.

Yes it was.

I laid still waiting for her reply and when it finally came, I was surprised.

Can I call you?

I read it twice thinking I read it wrong but no. That’s what she sent and of course I agreed. Soon, my phone rang and I picked it up in a heartbeat.

“Hello.” Her voice came through the line and my heart skipped beats.

“Hi.” I controlled my voice so it won’t turn into a squeaky tone. My heart pounded against my ribcage as I listened for her reply.

“Hey.” She said and chuckled at our amusing conversation. I could listen to her chuckling all day.

“Um…so why did you call?” I couldn’t help but question her. We usually only text.

“I wanted to hear your voice.” It was only a short statement but it made my tongue become heavy in my mouth. Why was she so good at just making things that would be hard to say sound so casual?

“O-oh…” I sat up and leaned on the headboard. My hand reached for the pink book that was always under my pillow and flipped it open.

“Yea…” The static cackled as she let out another laugh.

“I miss you.” I blurted out and I have no idea where my bravery came from. Isn’t it just normal that everyone tends to be braver through phone calls or texts?

The line went silent for a second before rustling came. Maybe she was shifting. With bated breath, I wait for her reply.  

“I miss you too.”

“What are you doing?” Damn I was daring than usual. My index finger circled the surface of my diary and I flipped to the back of the book where I had glued her pictures.

“Looking through some reports but I’m done now- What are you doing?”

My eyes gazed at the book on my lap and I thought it was better not to tell her what I was doing.

“Nothing. Talking to you.” I answered simply and dragged my finger across one of her photos.

She hummed on the other side and I racked my head trying to find something to say. Then something went across my mind. Something that has been gnawing me nonstop.

“Taeyeon, does Taehyung know about us?” I noticed the silence that followed my question.

“No. I was planning on telling him but I…” There was more rustling and I waited for her to finish her sentence but she only sighed.

“Why?”

“He likes you, you know that right?” That question took me off guard. So Taeyeon knew about it? Well, Taehyung was quite open about it in the first place and plus, they’re siblings.

“He likes you and here I am taking you away from him. I don’t know if I should tell him or not.”

I understood her problem. And I also didn’t know what to do if I were her.

I only hummed.

“Let’s not talk about that.” She said and I got it that she wasn’t comfortable with the topic.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked and my hand was writing the word ‘something’ on the surface of the new page I was on.

“Yes?”

“Were you surprised when I confessed?” I saluted myself for being able to pop that question.

“A little, although I was kind of expecting it.”

“Really? Was I that obvious?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“Hm you can say that. Why?”

“Nothing. What was your first impression of me?” I dared to ask. I could never imagine myself saying these to her face to face so I better take the advantage now. Ask everything that’s been bugging me since the first time I met her.

“Hm…first impression? I would have to say Taehyung’s girlfriend? I’m sorry.” She laughed loudly across the line and I pouted.

“I see.” I glumly said.

“How about you? What did you think of me?” She asked after she had calmed down. My cheeks turned red.

“Actually…” I trailed still debating whether I should tell her this or not.

“Actually I’ve seen you even before we met at your house.” I said and chewed on the inside of my mouth.

“Oh? Really? Where?”

“That time you came and picked Taehyung up. I was there with him.” I admitted revealing my stalker-side.

“And what went across my mind back then was the word hot.” I really have no idea how those words were even flying from my mouth nonstop. I just said directly to her that she was hot.

“Really?” Her tone went up questioningly and I regretted saying what I just said. She must be smiling on the other side.

“Yes.” I said.

“Thank you for telling me that. I’m happy. Actually, my impression on you would be clumsy.”  She said and my mind did flashbacks to my first slip in the bathroom in her kitchen and my second slip when we were at school and I ended up flashing her my cleavage.

I stayed silent and she added “Clumsy and cute.”

Maybe she just added cute so I could feel better.

“Um…can I ask another question?”

“You sure are curious tonight. But please do so.”

“How did…how did you er…I thought you weren’t into younger people?” This was the question I’ve been wondering ever since she confessed.

The static cackled again and I strained my ear to clearly hear her.

“That used to be true. I’ve never dated people younger than me. You’re the first one that broke my record. I didn’t know how it happened either. It just kind of did. Does there need to be a reason?”

“I guess no.”

“Are you still doubting me?”

“No! No of course.”

“Good because I like you. I like you I like you I like you very much.”

A smile came onto my face and tiny butterflies fluttered in my stomach.

“Thank you and I like you too.” I kept my diary away and placed my head down onto the pillow. I wonder when I will ever tell her about this secret diary. Maybe not now, or anytime soon.

I let the phone lay on my ear as I shut my eyes. I wish I could smell Taeyeon right now. That was a erted thought but I sincerely longed for her vanilla scent.

“You smell really nice you know?” Okay that was out of the blue.

“Me? I barely use perfume.”

“Really?”

“I smell like nothing.” She stated and I shifted to lay on my right side instead.

“That’s weird. Maybe that’s just your smell…if that even makes sense.” I laughed and she laughed too.

“Are you sleepy?”

“No.” I lied. “Are you?”

“I am but I don’t want to sleep.”

“Why?”

“Because I know I’ll only start missing you again.”

I could feel the organ between my lungs pulsate at those words of confession.

“I see…” Kim Taeyeon, what was she doing to me?

I wanted to ask her about her previous love life but I didn’t dare to so I just settled with a different question instead.

“Do you paint people often?”

“No. No, I don’t.” I smiled at her response.

“You should sleep now. I don’t want to keep you awake.” I answered and she unwillingly said yes.

“Good night and dream of me.”

And that night, I did. I dreamed of the familiar vanilla scent and the warmth wrapped around my shoulders. And I dreamt of Taeyeon's glowing onyx orbs smiling humouristicly as she leaned and kissed of head and that felt like forever.  

-

YES I'm finally done writing this long- chapter. Thank you for reading and I've been very busy this week since school just started. T^T I hope everybody would like this update. And tell me if there's any mistakes! x