Warning: Angst is in this, sorry.

"I like you." Baekhyun said with a straight face and serious tone "this is a joke, right?" I ask as anxiety rushes through my body as i feel sweat drip down my palms '' i take a deep breath and and close my eyes.

"I'm being serious i like you." He says again as he walks forward to me, touching my hands ever so gently with his slender fingers "I get it if you reject me I just hope we can still be friends." He asks again as he faces me with a smile sending shivers down my back.

This, just got a whole lot harder.

"Tao, T-tao are you there?" He asks knocking me back into reality, this wasn't the first time someone confessed to me infact it was the fourth time this year.

"I'm okay with it if you are." I tell him as I see his eyes light up and his smile trying to hide away from me as he grips onto my hands this time, hard as it was the only way to take his excitement out.

"Y-yeah, heck yeah! I would like that alot." He said as he fist pumped the air making me laugh, "so...how are we going to tell the others?" I ask worries on their opinions about me and my uality preference but now it's not only me.

"I don't know, do you want to?" He asks as he looks into my eyes. "Yeah, i mean i wouldn't mind it." I say as I look down to my shoes, staring at it as if i was even slightly interested in it at all.

"Okay then brag ahead." He asks letting go of me and with a smile pushed me towards Kris who was my best friend who i knew since year 4. "Kris I have something to tell you." I tell him but clearly saw I wasn't able to get his full attention yet.

"Kris, im dating someone." And at those words, those simple words his eyes widdened and looked at me in what I wasn't able to make out, his face unclear to me even though I've known him for so long.

"You must be kidding." He asked slightly laughing, as if waiting for me to laugh yet i didn't, it wasn't some petty joke or dare this time.

"Im dating Baekhyun, Kris." I continue waiting for him to reply or do something, atleast something but he didn't. He just stood there for a minute or two while the information was sinking in he shot up "YOU'RE DATING BAEKHYUN! I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE ENEMIES!" he asked as he grabbed onto my shoulders and shaked me violently.

"I-i know but it just happened, he confessed and i accepted." I told him.

Soon i was bombarded with questions, some that didn't need answers others that i thougt were okay to answer just to shut him up.

"When did you guys start liking each other?"

"Why now?"

"When did you realise you liked Tao?"

"Do you even like him back?"

"How did this even happen?"

"How long has it been since you guys started dating?"

I was quick to answer but only the questions I knew the answer too.

As the others knew some teased others would just watch and smile as Chen and Chanyeol pushed me and Baekhyun together sometimes forcing us to either hug or say "I love you" yet failed every time.

"Come on, stop being so stubborn you got a Baekhyun now hurry up and kiss!" Chen said slightly groaning as he watched Baekhyun's face go a bright pink and walk away while covering his face while I just shook my head or hit them lightly on the arm.

"Stop hanging out with Lay, you're being unloyal." Sehun said or more like teased as he saw how intimate me and Lay were, as I hugged Lay and Suho goodbye with Kai being sassy and crossing his hands as he looked away with a "hmfph." Making me back away and smile.

"I'm breaking up with you Baekhyun." I said only to see Baekhyun's tears threaten to fall down his pretty, rosy cheeks "I'm sorry just, you don't seem well with me, what I mean is that while im being a little you accept me and I hate it. I feel so selfish and I feel like im misleading you when i don't want that."

"Please don't cry." I tell him as i try to wipe his tears away yet it's only to be slapped away with his hand as he covered his crying face. "How can you expect me not too!" He yelled at me while i feel so sad for him, was it pity I was feeling? Or was it because I couldn't say no?

"Im sorry." I tell him as I once again look down to my shoes, we only lasted 1 month and a few days. 

Three days later we got back together, with the help of Luhan, Xiumin and Kyungsoo i realised i loved him.

As we became closer I told him everything, my brother who went to jail, my family who sells weed, my long story of depression, social anxiety, anorexia and insomnia while some stupid stories of the past like how I got a scar on my forehead that i cover up using makeup.

He also told me about everything, his family's dark past of killers and thiefs, how he used to do busking, almost being sold for child ion, watching as his father stabbed his mother who thankfully made it alive. I was the first and ony person who accepted his past and knew about his past.

Lily, that was her name, the girl who also loved him yet knew him longer, loved him more, was always there for him. I felt small and weak compared to her yet Bakehyun always reminded me, that he loved me and for that i never thought of anything.

I was blind, so blind as to what was happening yet everyone knew but never told me, to afraid i not only would break but it was best that way. It was to late now.

Soon Baekhyun started acting weird, acting like someone I would never like, then like that he left with no goodbye, no warning, no nothing just a simple leave and told me over phone. I was so frustated at him for doing that but I had to make up am excuse to cover him, because I loved him.

As we talked over phone he told me things, how he got eye surgery, dyed his hair, changed his hair style, changed his name but also changed his personality.

I forced myself to love him, i was so mad and upset at him yet i loved him too much to let him go.

"Baekhyun let's break up, I know we won't last and this is the best for everyone and I kow you ain't upset because you have so much other options so I'm nothing." I texted him over phone as I got sick of it. Got sick over the same answer to the constant problems not only me but our friends, no my friends had. "That's not my problem."

"Okay, that was easy." He replied and that broke my heart yet what did I expect? Him saying he loves me and won't stop loving me like he promised or ask if we could still be friends. God im so confused.

Why did he have to change so much? Just when I realised my feelings he had to change into someone he said he never would be.

"Don't you want answers." Kris asked but I shook my head and smiled a little yet on the inside I as breaking slowly "I don't want to waste time on useless like this, I don't need to stress over about all this." I told him "but he just texted you saying "I didn't like you for a long time when we we're dating, i was thinking of breaking up but nah" is that really how you're going to end it?!"

"Kris, I've been constantly forcing myself to love the new him but I can't, not anymore he has put me in so much pain and im not a toy! I ain't his play thing that's there for him whenever he's desperate, I'm not gonna be that person who tells him everything only for him to use it against me, I'm not as weak as to always think of him only to make me cry! Kris, I just want to be happy and not cry over my first person I've dated, im so done with him making me feel pain, I don't care if he loves someone else because I've moved on just it took longer then him, and to think he was the first to confess heh, im so pathetic."

"Tao..." Kris says as he pulls me in a hug, "shh it's okay to feel ty, if you want that then promise you won't cry over him, promise me you will find someone else who is better, promise me you will make Baekhyun wish he was still with you. Forget about him and stop thinking about it because that only complicates things."

I nod as I grip on t-shirt as if I'm trying to hold onto what's left of my sanity "I promise." I whisper loud enough for Kris to hear and he smiles at that "good, now get dressed we're going out with the others to help forget about this." I let go first and walk to my closet, it's been a long time since I've went out.

Tao forgot what it felt like to be free, to be single and to be happy, after a long time he learnt to deal with it and forget about the past, he still talks to Baekhyun but it is very rare, sometimes he would be quick to leave saying he was super busy when really he just didn't want to talk with guys who will think he's a toy, no not again, never again.

A/N: this is based of my love story except I changed some things like the dark pasts but mental health is true, I wrote in this in one go because im extremely passionate about this, why I used Baektao? Well that's because my ex gf was shorter then me and acted like Baekki (before she changed) and so I used Baekki, this kinda shows how I've progressed in the break up but the ending isn't true though it is something I'm going for it to finally let go and be free also I see alot of fanfics with the characfers still mopping around and so I decieded, why not do this for a change I'm strong enough to do this without crying i guess.