ACT ONE

Seungkwan and the Seven Humans
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The curtain lifts up and reveals an affable Hoshi and a tepid Vernon, both wearing suave formal suit and tie.

"Moshi moshi, it's me Hoshi." Hoshi said, grinning at his own humor.

"SEVENTEEN's back again with a new play for you guys!" he said. The audience whooped while the werewolves howled. Hoshi's grin widened.
"This centuries' play is" he waited, while drum rolls played on cue. The audience played along holding their breaths, as if they didn't see their huge gaudy posters stuck almost everywhere. "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs!" Trumpets were heard and more cheers ensued. "Revamped" he quickly added as if he remembered something.

As the noise died he added "We've received a lot of messages, love, support and wishes from our international fans over the years. When we read it we think 'Ah! What can we do for them? Something must be done.' And so, we've decided to keep another narrator" he gestured towards Vernon "who'd translate it all into English. It was one of the way we could express our gratitude for all the fan art." The audience murmured appreciatively. Some fans however were a bit jealous to see the coven favoring leprechauns and mermaids over them.

He looked at Vernon, signaling him to speak.

"Wazzup." Vernon coolly said with a nod. Females in the audience cheered with young witches blowing kisses and writing Vernon's name surrounded by pink hearts in the air magically with the help of their wands, jealousy diminished as they could now ogle him the entire play unlike last time where he got only five-minute screen time. Knowing Seungkwan, Vernon remained impassive towards the affection thrown at him.

"Without further ado, let's start the play!" Hoshi said enthusiastically and took his seat located far right, few steps close to the right-wing. Vernon followed him.


The lights dimmed and only the stage was bright. The set showcased an elegant bedroom.

"Once upon a time, in a kingdom far away, there lived a Queen." Hoshi said.

Jeonghan entered from the left-wing, wearing a long purple flowing gown with a red belt and ruby encrusted crown on his head. The audiences were momentarily stupefied by his beauty and murmured phrases of admiration.

"Her beauty was incomparable. An entity born to be envied, coveted and reverenced. Vanity was her Achilles heel. Her inner want to be idolized never ceased, she was the most beautiful woman in the kingdom. Anyone who dared to challenge her otherwise seek nothing but death." 

Thunder storms could be heard. Dramatic classical music was played. Jeonghan moved about imposingly, slower than his usual fast vampire speed.

"There was a Queen. She was pretty. If you're prettier then you die." Vernon translated eloquently.

"She had an instrument, a veracious one who'd answer all her questions - a magical coffee machine."

 

"Wait what?" the entire audience and members backstage asked in unison.


Chan just smacked himself on the forehead. 

 


Meanwhile in the right-wing.


Jun kept pacing back and forth. 


To a normal human it would seem as if he was standing still but an experienced vampire like Seungcheol knew better. He was moving at a speed that would be considered fast by vampires. And that is something to say. Everyone except Seungcheol shrugged it off as nervousness.
Seungcheol had seen him nervous before and this was next level. This was fighting the main boss level. It was as if the butterflies in his stomach were on steroids.

"Not steroids but 'GO-GO DRINK' or something" Wonwoo replied hearing the other's thoughts.

"He had what?!" Seungcheol exclaimed loudly, Wonwoo jumped at the intensity.

"Yeah, I heard Seokmin convincing Jun to drink it." he said.

"SSSSEEOKMIIIINNN" Seungcheol screamed. No good, that boy is up to no good. Ever since the soonseok couple has been united, they've caused nothing but trouble to him and everyone around them and as the coven leader Seungcheol had to take the responsibility of their mischief.

"Present hyung!" Seokmin grinned.

"You gave Jun what?" Seungcheol hissed in anger, dragging Seokmin in a corner.

"I-I-I , uh, gave him a drink to help him relax and get in the role." he glanced at Jun who was now sitting knees to his chest with hands wrapped around it, truculently rocking back and forth and gulped "It's uh, not working yet but when it does, he'll be alright."

"Oh, the drink is working alright." Seungcheol snapped. "You see that?" he pointed towards Jun "That's the effect of 'GO-GO DRINK'."

"Huh, b-bu-but the owner! The owner guaranteed me ah-an-and even my centaur friends have taken it many times they've-"

"On vampires it doesn't work." he said exasperatedly. "'GO-GO DRINK' makes them crazy and psychotic. Even amiable, tolerant vampires turn into savage beasts."

Seokmin's eyes widened in horror. Both of them looked at Jun who had started to mumble something which sounded like nefarious incantation to their ears. Scared, they held hands and stood in that position, not daring to look away or to speak.


"What do we do now hyung?" Seokmin whispered. 

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Comments

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Exo_Hunhan_Fangirl #1
Chapter 7: Sigh......my life......is SO NICE!
Exo_Hunhan_Fangirl #2
Chapter 4: I just couldnt stop laughing! Hahahaha! Om ing god........... but isnt Jeonghan suppose to be the mother? Why daddy?
julee22 #3
http://seoulatte.tumblr.com/post/145523322299/hanwooz-outright-crushed-his-dreams

So this just happened
EpicLolipop #4
Omg i have actual tears in my eyes i didnt expect anything of this but i was mentally dieing of laughter
julee22 #5
Chapter 7: MAGIC COFFEE MACHINE ON THE TABLE!
Igivenosugas #6
Chapter 6: HAHAHAHAHA, OH I THINK I LOST MY VOICE! Sorry Seungcheol, but Woozi's the KIng of Agyeo!
Igivenosugas #7
Chapter 3: HAHAHAHAHA, Oh My God!! WONWOO?! PFFFT *faints*
raebmonster #8
Chapter 7: This story entertained me so much X'D omg it was so funny :'DDD
XiaoGuang
#9
Chapter 7: one word for this fic: awesome!
one word for you: genius!
really... I never thought I'd find a fic like this. this is so funny! and you can use your words very well. wow, wow... I love you very very much!!! *throw my heart at you lol*
please make another seventeen fic (with a lot of jicheol) like this ne??
I'm craved for comedy!seventeen au :3
thanks for writing this awesome fic, you genius author-nim! :D
wildrose88 #10
Chapter 7: Cuteeeeeeee cuteeeee cuteeeee oh my godddd this is golddddd i love you