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{1}

“Oh my God!” I tripped over myself and fell back, my thoughts singed to a blunt as a woman crouched over me, holstering her gun by her waist. “What was that?!”

“I’m sorry; I didn’t really think that this building was occupied, are you hurt?” she placed her hands on my shoulders and I crawled back. This lady is nuts pulling a gun out of nowhere!

“You don’t just pull guns on people! I could’ve died if you shot me!” well that’s a lie. But she thinks I’m human and that would hurt nonetheless. Wait…it’s a girl… I looked up and gasped. They sent me a woman? Belle put that much effort into creating a woman for me?! But I’m not gay! She tilted her head as different emotions showed on my face.

“Are you okay?” she asked, easing her hand on my arm. Oh she’s close. I blinked. Yes Belle did take some time on her, it shows. Pretty was an understatement; stunning was an understatement. This madwoman was beautiful despite her being dripping wet. She was Asian; she had facial similarities with Han and Yi. Her healthy, diamond shaped face was framed by a mess of mesmerizing long black hair. She had big, almond-like eyes that I could perfectly imagine scrunching up in a smile. And now that I thought about it, her voice was pretty alluring, as it was on the lower side. This is what Lee said, taller, husky voice, and eye smile…but a woman? This was definitely a first and I wasn’t sure what to do. I noticed something cool and metal touch my neck and looked down, noticing a necklace. The tag read: T. Hwang. “I’m Tiffany.”

“Taeyeon,” I mumbled, still not really in my right mind. I’m not gay, is this for companionship or do they expect me to fall in love with her too? I leaned back and notice the burns on her arms and legs. “What happened to you?” I took her forearm, carefully examining the burn. They didn’t look bad but they seemed fresh and raw.

“To be honest I can’t remember much…I landed in the water and swam to shore before seeing this house…” she mumbled, confused about her whereabouts like they usually were. I sighed and managed to stand up, holding her up to confirm my suspicions about her height.

“Sit down, I’ll get something for those burns,” I told her and she sat on my hanging chair while I opened a nearby kitchen drawer, pulling out my tube of gramen. I walked back over with the ancient green gel and gently rubbed some on each wound, feeling content when she sighed. They always appealed to the caregiver in me first, even if they never intended. Gramen cured pretty much any flesh wound known to man so I wasn’t surprised she was already feeling better.

“Thank you,” she murmured and I hummed. “Do you know what this place is?”

“I should, I’ve been stuck here for a while,” I said and she raised an eyebrow. Okay, yeah, that’s attractive. “Let’s just say that it’s better for you the less you know about this place. But don’t worry, nothing will hurt you.”

“I don’t think I need you to tell me that,” she smirked, patting her gun, and I managed to smile. “But that still doesn’t give me a reason to trust you. How do I know that you don’t just hang out here and prey on unsuspecting people like me?” it was hard to explain to the previous men what this place was, and according to the Neaimos, most people have given up on the belief of deities and magic.

“You can trust me if you want to, but you won’t be able to leave even if you had the energy to swim for a hundred miles. You’ll always end up back here with me.” I left out the part where I knew the way to get her off the island.

“Are you trying to tell me that this place is magic?” she wondered and I shrugged. The woman rubbed her temples. Even frustrated she’s pretty. “I’m gonna lie down, if you try anything, I can still shoot you.”

“What am I going to try?” I rolled my eyes and watched as she claimed my bed, rolling in it with a stretch. Who is this girl?

I made my way down to the beach, squatting beside Peter’s grave. I let out a deep breath as I encircled my knees in my arms. “It’s a girl…her name’s Tiffany,” I spoke, hoping that he’d be able to hear me. Peter embraced the fact that I wasn’t human. I told him many things about my imprisonment and of the other Neaimos. “I don’t know what they’re thinking now; all of this power might be wearing down on their minds. She’s pretty…but that doesn’t mean I’ll fall in love with her. The first thing she did was pull a gun on me, first impression already made,” I grumbled, rubbing a velvety flower petal between my thumb and forefinger. She’s cautious and crazy, but she’s cute too.

It’s barely been a month; I was still attached to Peter. He might’ve been stupid and immature but he listened and kept me company. Before him, I sent Richard away back to his family when he lied about having one. Betrayal hurt immensely, I understood why the Neaimos disassociated themselves with me, but did I deserve to be deceived and lied to for an eternity? I wonder how Tiffany will hurt me. Will I fall in love only to learn she’s straight? Will she have a wife or husband or some form of significant other? Will we become friends and will she betray me? Will I kill her? There were many ways any relationship could fail. Am I not safe from women as well?

Tiffany appeared out of the corner of my eyes and I looked up at her as she approached. “Bill said that dinner’s ready.” I was impressed.

“You weren’t scared of him?” I didn’t know how to cook human food as a goddess; I sustained myself on divine food, so I was given the invisible servant to tend to mortal needs. He rarely spoke. The previous men never met Bill besides Peter, who was greatly impressed by all of the food he prepared.

“I was at first but everything on this island has been pretty freaky so I just rolled with it,” she said and I stood, kissing my fingers and waved it at Peter. I’ll be back. “All magic aside, this place is beautiful.”

“Yeah, but I’ve gotten pretty used to it,” I noted, looking around. They always told me that the island was like a dream with its soft white sand and crystal clear blue water. I was glad the place was easy on the eyes, but after the loneliness and heartache I experienced on the white sand I didn’t have much desire to sit there anymore. “You’re very easy to talk to.” I remembered how hard it had been to gain the trust of other mortals who were too confused to understand their surroundings, but Tiffany seemed trusting, perhaps a little too trusting.

“I’ve been trained to distinguish threats, I’ve concluded that you’re not one,” she smiled and I felt a little lightheaded. Pretty. “If you wanted to hurt me you could’ve done it, especially with the things that have happened here, I’ve also concluded that you’re capable of it.”

“Thanks for trusting me,” I smiled and she hummed, opening the door for me when we came back to the house. On the small table was a bowl of steaming pasta with shrimp, mushrooms, and peppers while Bill set out a little pyramid of ambrosia squares for me. “Please eat; I’ve heard that Bill makes pretty good food.” She grinned at me more and my heart pumped. Oh my God. I tried to hide behind my emotions by taking a bit out of a square, enjoying the taste.

“What are you eating?” she wondered and I stared at it, thinking about how to explain ambrosia.

“It’s a special kind of food meant for people like me,” I told her and she leaned in closer.

“It looks like beans,” she said.

“Well, it’s hard to explain, but it tastes kind of sweet and rich and makes me feel warm inside,” I popped the rest in my mouth and she giggled. I haven’t heard a cuter sound in my life.

“You’re really cute, you know that?” Oh my God she just called me cute. I must’ve really missed Peter, or everyone, because my face started burning with the simple compliment. Oh my God, am I really attracted to a woman? My blush went harder. “The next time Bill comes around I am going to squeeze the life out of him, I swear, this is the best thing I’ve ever eaten.”

“Good luck, he doesn’t like hugs,” I managed to say and she grinned. Her smile was infectious so I smiled back. I’m gonna kill you Belle.

____

“Taeyeon.” I groaned and pressed my fingers into my eyes, trying to draw out the sleep. What’s happening? “Taeyeon-ah, get up,” Tiffany insisted, shaking my arm. No name calling or else I’m going to have a heart attack. But I kept my mouth shut on that topic.

“What do you want? Make Bill get you breakfast, I keep telling you I can’t cook,” I grumbled, tugging the blanket up only to have it yanked off of me. I groaned and felt around for it.

“A girl is here to see you.” Not another one! I rolled over and swept my hand through my hair. “Her name’s Belle.” What. I sat up and blinked as Tiffany pointed at the door for me to see the waving blonde. Please, acting as if she doesn’t want to tear my insides out. Well then I’ll wave back at you, .

“Stay inside, I’ll talk to her,” I told Tiffany and she sat on the bed while I hurried out the door, coming face to face with Belle for the first time in millennia. I’m glad you’re shorter than me. I hope Tiffany can’t hear us from there. “What the Hell do you want?”

“She’s pretty isn’t she? Have you told her that you’re falling for her yet?” the goddess wondered, straightening out her sweatshirt. I pushed her back and she laughed, walking down the steps as I tried to put distance between us.

“What the is wrong with you? Peter died and then three weeks later you bombard me with the companionship of the first female mortal I’ve ever seen and the confusion of my uality that I didn’t know that would bend—?!”

“So you are bending,” she nodded. I tried ignoring her and made my way to the edge of the tide. “It’s good to know that my hard work didn’t go to waste.” This girl is going to be the death of me.

“What, you didn’t think that I’d be attracted to her?” I kicked the sand.

“I knew you’d be attracted to her but I wasn’t sure of whether you’d develop feelings for her. You’re a goddess, after all, but mortals always groveled at her feet.” Why is Belle so set that good looks can rule the world? Just because it’s her specialty.

“! Belle! This isn’t right! Am I not safe from any man or woman that washes up on my shore? You can’t even give me a friend, it has to be someone I fall in love with?!” I yelled and she frowned.

“Yes it does, because that’s what we agreed on when we decided your punishment: isolation and unrequited love. I give you pain and I give you heartache for a reason; you can’t get it through your ing skull that you haven’t regained our trust! Earn it and then we’ll see what happens,” she tapped my chest and I swatted her hand away. Belle always hated me, even before my betrayal was known. She hated me for overpowering her lover, who had no grudges against me, simply because she wanted more power. I was surprised she was compliant with the Neaimos Ruler.

“You loathe me! It’s not my fault I’m more powerful than Grayson! You and your little circle just wanted my out of there so Nero could take the position as Ruler,” I snapped and she crossed her arms.

“Nero is better than you, let’s admit it,” she began and my jaw clenched. “He knows what we want as a collective, not just himself.”

“I am not selfish,” I spat, my veins rippling with adrenaline. Calm down, no storms, do not create a storm. I managed to stabilize my anger by placing my hand over my heart, squeezing it tight. Where is that butterfly knife when I need it?!

“You are selfish and because you haven’t figured that out yet I will keep sending guys and girls to hurt you until it finally sinks in,” she said. I backed away from her, rubbing my eyebrows. “I only came here because Lee threatened to send Tiffany underwater. She’s like my child; I can’t let her die from his hands.”

“Go hurl yourself in Kolasi,” I growled.

“You’re lucky we didn’t do that to you!” she pointed and I managed to ward off a stray lightning bolt before I struck her down. Dammit I didn’t even notice that my own storm is appearing. “Let’s be honest though, when you’re angry you throw some mean bolts, like Uncle.” I turned away from her, clenching my arms. I tried to stop the brewing clouds and rumbling thunder. That man is the ultimate betrayer, throwing me under the bus like that. I don’t want to be anything like him.

“Taeyeon,” Tiffany’s arms fell to my waist and her lips brushed my ear. I didn’t even notice her. I couldn’t help but melt a little in her arms. She was so warm it felt unreal. “It’s getting dangerous out here, let’s go inside.” My nerves calmed down. Damn look at the influence she already has on me. I breathed deeply and nodded.

“Nice seeing you again, Belle,” I let Tiffany pull me aside as I scoffed.

“You too, Cousin,” she waved, her voice dripping with just as much sarcasm, and I turned the woman beside me around just as Belle snapped her fingers. I took multiple deep breaths before pulling Tiffany’s arms off of me, no matter how much I wanted them.

“I need some space, you can go inside.” I need Peter, Tiffany’s only been around for several days, I can’t depend on her so much, especially when I know that in the end she will leave me. But when did that ever stop me before?

“That girl was your cousin?” she asked, changing the subject, and I let out a deep sigh. The Neaimos are pretty much made up of all my cousins.

“Yeah, we’re cousins,” I nodded solemnly.

“You share blood, why are you guys fighting so much?” the question was so personal but then she held my chin and fighting her wasn’t an option anymore.

“We have trust issues, I did something bad and she did something bad and we can’t forgive each other,” I sighed and rubbed her shoulders. “Please, just go back. I’ll be there soon.”

“Is there something special in that corner of the beach?” she wondered and I stiffened. “You always sit there…” she’s very observant, I like that a lot. She can’t know about Peter, how would she think of me, knowing I murdered him?

“Yes, there is something special there, but I can’t tell you. Don’t worry about it, I’ll come back inside soon and then we’ll explore some more.” Tiffany enjoyed looking around the island and she was pretty talented at mapping out the terrain. She seemed to have another aspect of my type: the desire to explore.

The young woman eventually let me go after kissing my hand and she walked up the steps. I slid over to the familiar patch of flowers and sat down. “First Lee and then Belle, I don’t think anyone ever visited when you were here,” I stared at the grave. I could still imagine his face, sleeping peacefully beneath the sand. My heart lurched and I closed my eyes. Am I selfish? Am I selfish for wanting love, for actively searching in the mortals that appear in my life? “Did you think I was selfish, Peter?” He would probably say that I am for asking so many people to spend eternity with me. Maybe that’s what’s wrong with me: I have to stop falling in love so easily.

All it took was a pretty face and I was gone, blinded by their strengths and pushing away their flaws. I’ve spent years believing that each man was suitable for eternal companionship, but how many of them were actually compatible for that? None, because I loved each of them more than they loved me. I buried my face in my knees, feeling emotional. Am I selfish for wanting to spend my life with someone? Desperate maybe, but is it selfish? I didn’t want to think that I was selfish. It was their fault for imprisoning me on this island for so long. I crave company; it’s the only antidote to this poison. Whenever I was alone I always felt the weight of my past loves, they pressed down on my ribcage and trembled in my nerves. The scars on my little heart opened up, every lie and deception rushed passed the floodgates until it was impossible to hold back. I need to stop falling in love. I could start now. Yes. Tiffany was a woman; I wasn’t falling for her I was just attracted to her and that was a foreign experience. I don’t have to love someone I find attractive. I don’t have to fall in love. Maybe then I can regain the Neaimos’ trust and leave my island; maybe then I can find someone to love forever.

I stood up and brushed off my pants. It’s settled then. I have to try; I have to try to refrain from falling in love. Without love, I wouldn’t be able to hurt when she left me and I wouldn’t selfishly want her by my side. I might be lonely, but I know what loneliness is. “Anything to stop this pattern,” I nodded to myself and looked down at Peter. I kissed my fingers. “I miss you.” I didn’t mean to confess that out loud but I did. I never meant to hurt him, I wish he knew that. I wish he knew that he would be the last love I would have on this stupid island.