"Hey, you won't come with us? It's lunchtime already, you're probably hungry after the activity in physical education class."

"I'll pass. I think I prefer to nap. I'll just eat later."

"Again? You've been skipping lunch lately.. Ugh. Fine then, but promise you'll eat later?"

"Yea promise. See you Fany-ah"

" 'kay, see you later Yuwree"

There wasn't even a minute passed but here I am standing in front of my locker looking at a bubbly girl skipping, no, more like hopping her way out of the dressing room. It wasn't new for me to lose my appetite even after a long tiring rounds of volleyball. I just really want to nap that's all, but I'm still grateful for Fany for her concern. I met Tiffany long before when we were still kids. I was always the "protector" in our relationship cause she's too timid and shy even before but I guess we switched places when we entered university. Well, I think I prefer to think Tiffany not as my "protector" but as my "mother" I mean, seriously lecturing me everyday but still, that's her way of showing love so I'm okay about it.

I sighed. "Must be nice to have that kind of energy and joy ... Well, better change. I stink already"

After that I walked my way straight to the rooftop. There wasn't a rule that students are not allowed here in this place but I guess they just didn't like the idea to walk till the 8th floor just to sit or eat here even how beautiful the sight would be.

But I guess I'm thankful for that. It gave me permission to hold captive and obtain this place just for me. This place is quiet, not crowded, perfect for people who wanted to think, perfect for people who wanted be alone... People like me.

Don't get me wrong, I have friends. Noisy, hyper friends to add to it. I enjoy people's laughter and company, I really do. It's just that, I don't seem to understand anything anymore. I feel so confused with everything. Everything in this life seems to hold and pin me down in one place, not letting me go to take a step forward. Holding me to a complete halt, blindfolding me with gray silk to which gives me the ability to see all things in gray, black and white even how colorful it seemed to be to others. 

' I lost the ability to enjoy little things.

I lost the ability to smile from the heart. 

I lost myself.'

Three same sentences conquered my mind again. Everyday these never failed to pop on my head as everyday I see students come in and out of this school, holding lunches or books in their arms, walking side by side their friends, talking and smiling happily, enjoying every single details of their life. 

Definitely, this place, the rooftop, is a perfect place...

A perfect place to hide myself from this unfamiliar world.. 

A perfect place to be alone.. 

A perfect place to just nap and escape this peculiar dimension called "reality"..

As I lie down, place my headphones on my ears, close my eyes ready to step out of this world.. A voice ringed my ear. So soft and yet strangely loud for me to hear even with the loud music booming across my eardrums.

I opened my eyes to see where the voice came from but there were no other soul visible on the rooftop. There was just me and the open door. I lay back down and gazed on the gray sky which had always been there with me, remembering the simple yet soft words spoken to my ear. 

I closed my eyes, wishing to see the origin of these lovely words when I wake up and slowly I drifted to sleep, words playing back..

"Do you need someone to talk to?