If you met Kim Hyuna, the first thing you noticed was her beauty. You noticed the way her long, black locks shimmered under sunlight, and how her silky skin could be compared to the milky way. You'd notice that there wasn't an inch of fat on upon her perfect proportions. When you first met Kim Hyuna you'd notice the way she carried herself with such unwavering confidence that made all hush in her captivating presence.

If you met Kim Hyuna a second time, the first thing you'd notice was that her confidence seemed like infuriating arrogance. You'd notice that her smile wasn't kind, and the way she seemed to brush people off. If you met Kim Hyuna a second time you began to feel small in her presence. Because when she'd greet you with that hardened look in her eyes, you'd feel like an ant- an annoyance she accidentally stepped on.

If you were lucky enough to meet Kim Hyuna a third time, you'd begin to feel sick in her presence. But if you were able to look past her suffocating sense of superiority that wrapped around you like a vice, you'd notice that her not-so-kind smile never quite reached her ears. If you were observant enough, you'd notice that she felt small to her own arrogant self. If you met Kim Hyuna a third time, you'd notice her eyes, the color of the afternoon sun shining through a glass of whisky, never quite had any light in them.  

And if you met Kim Hyuna any more times than that, your fantasy of her would completely crumble.

If you were one of the few souls able to get close to her, you'd know that Kim Hyuna died on December 22, 2012. Or at least that's what she'd tell you, for Kim Hyuna was very much alive in the flesh. And with a look in her eyes that seemed so disconnected from the world, Kim Hyuna would tell you that her soul had died on that day along with another's, and that she was nothing more than skin stretched across brittle bones. 

If you were one of the unlucky few to get close to Kim Hyuna, you'd know that she had too many missing pieces to put her back together. 

Chapter One

September 4th 2014

When Hyuna met Kwon Jiyong there was nothing special about it. She didn't quite remember much about their encounter. There was no sparks flying when looking into each other's eyes. She didn't notice the small details of his face or little gestures he made. There was no coy smiles and sly flirtations. He wasn't some random hero on the dark streets who saved her from crude men. No, their was nothing particularily special about that day, besides the fact that it was her best friends birthday. It was a cool night in the busy streets of Seoul. Hyuna had been wearing a short club dress that didn't  shield her from the fall wind. She didn't quite remember the color of the dress. Was it red? It must have been. That was her favorite color after all. 

"Ah, it's cold." Gayoon complained, grabbing onto Hyuna's arm for warmth. "At least we're finally here." 

Club Ellui 

The bright, flashing letters of the nightclub made Hyuna involuntarily scowl. 

"Hyuna-yah, why do you already have such a scary look on your face?" Gayoon teased. "It's not like you've never been to a nightclub before. Besides, it's only T.O.P sunbae's birthday." she nudged her friends side to lighten the mood. 

What Gayoon said was true. If anything Hyuna frequented clubs and bars a bit too much. But that was exactly it. His birthday. T.O.P. Choi Seunghyun. The best friend that she hadn't seen in over a year. Hyuna had never missed his birthday in the ten years that she had known him. What exactly was she supposed to say when she saw him? Hey, sorry that I left Korea for a year and a half without telling you, but happy birthday. 

She sighed deeply. 

"Yah, quit thinking so hard," Gayoon demanded with a poke to the forehead. 

Hyuna was quick to defend herself. "I'm not-

""What if he gets angry? What if he's still hurt? What if he doesn't wanna see me?' you're thinking these kinds of thoughts, right?"

Hyuna quickly snapped shut at her friend's spot on prediction. "I-

"Hyuna-yah," Gayoon took of Hyuna's hands in her own, giving her a stern look. "T.O.P sunbae would never have those kinds of mean thoughts towards you. You're his best friend of ten years after all, right? I know that he misses you as much as you miss him."

Hyuna gave her friend a tight lipped smile. "Thanks, unnie." 

And with newfound confidence, Hyuna entered the club with her friend. The flashing the lights of the club and sea of swarming bodies temporarily blinded her, and before she could completely recover, Gayoon had took her by the hand and began to drag her across the club towards the stairs to the upper V.I.P floor. The bouncer easily let them pass when he recognized Gayoon, and still holding Hyuna by the wrist, she began to drag her up the stairs as if she was afraid that if she let go the younger women would turn around and run away- which wasn't a far fetched thought. 

The upper floor was a large balcony that overlooked the rest of the club below.  Hyuna noticed that it had more of a calm vibe to it. There was no writhing bodies or hollering, just people sitting on expensive couches drinking ridiculously expensive cocktails in their ridiculously expensive club attire. It was obvious that the area was reserved for idols and the wealthy. 

Hyuna had to admit it, she didn't personally know most of the people here. Nor did she know all of them either, but they all clearly knew who she was with the way they looked at her with such surprise in their eyes. She had yet to publicly announce her return to Korea. Of course one of the pitfalls of being a celebrity was the fact that everyone knew who you were.

It may have seemed ridiculous to say that she didn't know Choi Seunghyun's friends when she had been close to him for the better part of a decade, but she wasn't necessarily lying when she said that either. It wasn't as if she didn't know who they were. Being an idol herself, she had met several of them in passing at music awards or had seen them on T.V. But Hyuna had never appealed to the idea of getting to know any of Seunghyun's friends. Hyuna wasn't someone who was enticed at the idea of getting to know anyone outside 4minute, period. She especially wasn't close to any of the members of BigBang, and had only talked to them in passing- as ridiculous as it sounded. 

Hyuna wasn't quite sure why she avoided the members. They were close friends that Seunghyun had cherished very much since even before they debuted 8 years ago. Maybe that's why she avoided them so much. Because when her brother had introduced them ten years ago, her twelve year old self had quickly stuck to him like glue, and for awhile it was just the three of them. Until that fantasy was broken when Seunghyun told her that he had been a trainee at YG for the better part of  three years, and that he was debuting as an idol soon. 

She didn't know why, but for some reason, Hyuna had felt betrayed when Seunghyun had told her that. He was four years her senior, but the pair got along really well. Seunghyun was never popular at school. He was chubby and didn't work well with others, and often ran away from school. His mother and teacher had become tired of him running away from school and eventually began to hide his shoes. Maybe that's why he got along so well with Hyuna's twelve year old self.  Because on those days he ran away from school barefoot on the asphalt street, Hyuna had been patiently waiting for him by the Han River with a different pair of shoes in hand.

Hyuna would laugh at his chubby figure out of breathe, and then with their arms linked they'd head to their favorite shop to eat jajangmyeon. Her brother would quickly find them after school in the corner of the old shop stuffing their faces, and would scold Seunghyun from running away from school for the millionth time before joining them. 

Yes, maybe that's really why they got along- because Hyuna found Seunghyun's awkwardness endearing and didn't care if he was a little chubbier than the rest of the kids. She didn't care that he was too strangely self conscious of his body to show more than his hands, or that his dream of being a famous rapper seemed far fetched and childish.

And when she learned that he was to debut in a year, she felt devastated. Seunghyun began to slim down and he began to spend less time in the noodle shop. Hyuna often found herself waiting by the Han River until sundown, only the furiously stomp home alone. It was like the little world the trio had built for themselves had suddenly became too big, and to be honest- Hyuna had resented Bigbang for that. Admittedly, when she was younger she was jealous that Seunghyun had found friends that accepted his awkwardness and strange tendencies- which only served to fuel her anger. It was like the little things she had adored about him weren't so special anymore. 

Of course, as Hyuna grew she eventually got over her petty jealousy. She was proud of Seunghyun, and nothing made her more happier than seeing him perform on the stage he had always dreamed of on T.V. 

And maybe if life had been kinder to Hyuna, and fate had played out differently she would have exchanged more than a 'hello' to the members that her best friend cared about so much, but it hadn't been. 

"Ah, there's T.O.P sunbae." Gayoon's words snapped Hyuna out of her reminiscing. "Sunbae!" Gayoon called out to catch his attention, once again pulling Hyuna along with her. 

The tall figure who had been chatting with some friends, turned his head in their direction. Hyuna unconsciously tensed up. He looked the same as the last time she had seen him a year ago, though his hair was longer and dyed a bright blue. "Gayoon, you made it." He quickly noticed the familiar face standing next to Gayoon as he approached the pair. His eyes widened, as his jaw dropped to the floor. "Hyuna?" 

"I'm back," she said lamely. 

Before she knew it, she was swept into a bone breaking hug. But as quickly as it happened it was over, as Seunghyun held her at arms length to look at her, as if to confirm that she was actually real. "Daebak. I can't believe this little Podo is back."

And with that, the tension that Hyuna felt disappeared immediately at the use of the old nickname. She smirked. "Yah, why are you still using that ridiculous nickname ChimChim."

"Yah!" he yelled with a smile. 

"Ah, since I wasn't here last year I thought I would get you something extra special." Hyuna handed the small box with a ribbon on top to her friend. 

"What's this?" he asked curiously. And with a satisfied smirk, Hyuna watched as his eyes bugged out of his head at the sight of his present. "Aish, I can't take this. It's really too expensive." 

Hyuna shooed her hand at him. "Is money really something you need to complain about? Besides, I know that you really like watches. And if you try to give it back to me I'll be mad, because that watch is limited edition and sells quickly. Do you know how long it took me to find one?"

Seunghyun smiled warmly at her. "You being here is more than enough of a great present for me." 

Hyuna felt bashful at the compliment. "Aigoo, quit saying such weird things. It doesn't suit you."

He laughed, "does it? Come sit and have a drink. We have a lot to catch up on." 

Gayoon was quick to comply, and once again Hyuna was dragged along to a table surrounded by a curved leather couch.

"Guys, look who's back," Seunghyun announced to those at the table. 

"Ah, Hyuna-ssi? It's been awhile." 

Hyuna could feel her body stiffen at the voice, and recognized it's owner to be the one and only Taeyang. Her eyes scanned the faces sitting at the table and recognized them as all the members of Bigbang, as well as Tablo and Jinusean. 

"Ah..." she didn't quite know what to say. 

"I didn't know you were back in Korea," Seungri commented before beckoning with a friendly smile. "You can sit down ya know, we don't bite."

Gayoon quickly pushed Hyuna to sit down before taking a seat herself. And unfortunately, Gayoon had pushed her to sit right next to the infamous G-Dragon. Out of all the people in the group, she disliked him the most. Seunghyun had known him the longest and had told her how they were middle school friends before he moved away. Hyuna felt like there was a special part of Seunghyun he knew about that she didn't, and she really didn't like that.

His hair had changed from the last time she saw him- it always did. This time it was dyed a pale blonde with both sides of his head shaved. He smiled at her. "Annyeonghaseyo," he greeted politely. "Haven't seen you in awhile. How've you been?"

Hyuna blinked. The two never exchanged more than simple pleasantries for the past 7 years, and now he was striking up casual conversation with her with a too friendly smile on his face that irritated her.

 Hyuna simply turned away from his annoyingly smiling face to take a sip of the martini Seunghyun had placed in front of her. "Fine." 

"Ah, that's good. You're still dating Siwon sunbae?"

She didn't quite know how to respond to such a question coming from him. "Uh...yes," came her curt and cold reply. 

"That's good," he repeated. 

And so that was how the rest of her night went. Jiyong not knowing how to take a hint that she really did not want to be buddies with him, and the others attempting to strike up conversation with Hyuna, and Hyuna giving terse and blunt replies while she continued to sip on her martini, hoping the alcohol would block out their annoying voices. Frankly, she didn't appreciate their fake attempt to act like they were happy that she was back. Nor did she appreciate them prying into her personal life.

So Hyuna did what she knew how to do best. She drank herself into oblivion. 

Ah, that was quite a long first chapter. I never had originally planned on it to only be 1000 words long, but I kinda got carried away with details and it ended up much longer than I expected it. I was pleasantly surprised when I logged into my account and found that people had already subscribed and commented before I even released the first chapter. I'm glad that my description was interesting enough, so thank you all so much! I don't have an editor so I apologize for any grammatical errors I made. This story won't be a fast paced one. Frankly, I'm more focused on character development more than making them fall in love quickly. Also, the fact about TOP being chubby, reclusive, and running away from school is actually true and I thought it would be a cute thing to add. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this fanfiction of mine <3

Podo (grape)

ChimChim (a nickname Hyuna gave Hyun when he was chubby)