Lu Han hears the roll of a chair before something hits the back of his chair, followed by the soft flesh of Jongdae’s back against his and the light thud of the back of Jongdae’s head against his. In the office, Lu Han and Jongdae sit in their desks with their backs facing towards each other, and it’s ideal to them, because they can just swivel their chairs if they want to talk to each other. And as of now, the familiar groan Jongdae lets out has him snickering. “What’s your problem?”

                “This week hasn’t been going well for me.” He responds. Lu Han continues his typing on the computer and lets out a hum.

                “Yeah? How come?” He asks.

                “I have a lot of work with the programming.” Jongdae says. “And I had to sleep late for the past few days. You know that’s not my thing. Sleeping late really made me screw up, like, I can’t think straight.”

                “Oh,” Is all Lu Han says. “ to be you, ain’t it.” What Lu Han does for a living always puts people off, their eyebrows raising and eyes widening, saying he doesn’t look like the type. Lu Han doesn’t mind it, he hears it often enough that he’s gotten used to it. Seeing people shocked is always a thing for him, and he’s not sure why. It’s probably because of the way people get flushed just by finding out what he’s capable of, but there’s also a part of him that thinks that maybe everyone is just underestimating him. Same goes for Jongdae, so it’s safe to say that he’s not alone.

But oh well, Lu Han does give very bad first impressions. He hears another groan, and Lu Han thinks he probably didn’t say as many things as what Jongdae had hoped. He leans forward to his desk and turns around to face Jongdae. “Get laid.”

                Jongdae’s lower lip juts out and he looks down at his feet as he thinks. Then he swivels his chair around and meets Lu Han’s eyes. “You think I should go to a club?”

                “Yeah,” Lu Han replies with a smile and a shrug. He holds his hand out to hold Jongdae’s shoulder and shakes him gently. “Look, I promise I’ll even go with you this time.”

                “Really? What about later?”

                “Yeah, I think my schedule is–” He stops mid-sentence as he remembers something. “Wait, sorry, I can’t. I have to take a friend of mine out for shopping.”

                “Fine, we’ll just do it some other day.” Jongdae only says, before he moves his chair back to his desk. Lu Han turns to his computer again, where he’s fixing Zitao’s online dating profile. It still needs more fixing, Lu Han thought, and a smile spreads across his face when he thinks about the conversation he just had with Jongdae.

                Yeah, Zitao should be fine with a one night stand.

~

“Oh dear Taozi,” Lu Han begins with a sigh, taking the clothes away from Zitao’s hand and putting it back on the rack. “I thought I grew up with you long enough to spice up your taste in clothes.” Lu Han had been quite excited about taking Zitao shopping. He was already in Zitao’s apartment when he came back from work, and Zitao isn’t at all worried about how he thinks Lu Han’s going to drain all the money out from his wallet, he’s more worried about how Lu Han got inside his apartment in the first place. He’s pretty sure he locked his door before he left for work in the morning.

                “I don’t like your taste in clothes,” Zitao says, scratching the back of his ear.

                Lu Han gasps dramatically. “My taste in clothes is unique.”

                “I’m not saying it’s not,” Zitao says. He looks down at the pants in his hands. “Hey, are you sure about these pants?”

                “What about it?” Lu Han blinks. Zitao sends him a disapproving look.

                “Didn’t you see how these pants looked on me? They’re too tight.”

                “That was the point,” Lu Han says, turning to the rack of clothes once more. “You need your thighs to look plush and squishy,” He hands Zitao another piece of clothing.

                “They make me walk like a penguin,” Zitao amends, taking the flannel from Lu Han’s hands. Lu Han pushes him to the dressing room again, and he makes sure to lock the door in case Lu Han gets in. Lu Han and Zitao have been with each other long enough to know each other’s butts, but Zitao still deserves a bit of privacy if it means Lu Han’s going to criticize him in any way possible.

                “Hey, trust me,” He hears Lu Han call out from outside. “You’re going to have to go through all this if you don’t want to be single.”

                “Being single wasn’t such a big problem to me in the first place.” Zitao responds. Zitao is patient enough to wait for his future lover to come crashing down at him, no matter how long it takes for fate to decide it’s time.

                It seems that Lu Han knows what he’s thinking. “Well, at some point you can get tired of waiting, you know.” He hears him sigh.

~

Jongdae finds himself sprawled on the apartment floor, a bag of chips beside him as he stares at nothing in particular. The past few weeks has him stressed out, and he had to agree with Lu Han, he needs to get laid. It would’ve been much easier if he has a boyfriend, but he’s at the point in life where he’s not up for being in a relationship.

                He thinks back about his first boyfriend, a particular Kim Junmyeon and his pocket full of money. No, Jongdae didn’t love him for his money, it was simply because he liked complements being thrown at him, like he was worshipped. Junmyeon was awfully cheesy, but he still loved it, and their relationship lasted a solid six months because Junmyeon gave him so many gifts, and Jongdae never gave him anything but his love and smile. Junmyeon was too good for him.

                His second one came two years after his first, and it was with a tall man named Yi Fan, or Kris, or Kevin, or whatever. This man is probably into himself more than Jongdae, and while in the relationship Jongdae questions why the man asked him out in the first place. This relationship lasted 4 months, much too soon for Kris and Jongdae wonders who can put with him for more than four months if he can’t even put up with him that long.

                His third boyfriend was a cute one named Kim Minseok. He really loved Minseok, but Minseok takes everything far too seriously. Jongdae is a sassy one, and Minseok takes his sarcasm to his heart, constantly being offended and resulting in Jongdae apologizing him. Despite that, the relationship lasted one year, and Jongdae came to realize that if he were to have someone love him, that someone has to be someone who can undestand him and can match with his snarky comments.

                And after that came more relationships, one even lasting for just a week because the man’s only using him to get his girlfriend back. It sends shivers down his spine and something in his stomach drops now that he thinks about getting a boyfriend. He hears the click of a doorknob before it creaks open, and Jongdae doesn’t even bother looking up, seemingly familiar with the way Baekhyun’s feet drag against the floors when he walks.

                “Hey, I’m home.” He hears Baekhyun call out to him, like he’s a pet that’s waiting for his owner to come home. He sits up immediately and turns his attention towards the door, where Baekhyun is taking off his shoes. He sighs and lies back down on the floor. Baekhyun doesn’t have alcohol in the apartment so Jongdae stuffs himself with chips, or any food he can find in the fridge, which are mostly his because Baekhyun is the type of person to hog all your food.

                “How was your day,” It was not a question. Jongdae does not expect an answer, simply because he’s exhausted, stressed out and he’s not interested.

                That line was seemingly familiar to Baekhyun. Anyone who hadn’t spent several years with Jongdae would probably get him subjected to an hour of how their day went, but that’s not what Jongdae wanted. Baekhyun’s been with him for as long as he can remember, and normally Baekhyun takes Jongdae’s habits as a joke, only shrugging and laughing it off. But when it comes to times like this, he knows what to do, and Jongdae should appreciate that. “How many coffees did you have?” Baekhyun asks.

                “I didn’t.” He frowns, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. “Dude, who eats chips with coffee? That’s just strange.”

                “Those are my chips.” He hears Baekhyun say. Shoot.

                Okay, so maybe he’s the type to hog all your food. He keeps forgetting that he’s in Baekhyun’s apartment, not his own. “I need to get laid.” He says, changing the topic, eyes fixed on the crack on the ceiling. Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, and he expects that it’s because he doesn’t hear him. “I need to get laid.” He repeats, and suddenly his view of the crack on the ceiling is blocked by the ugliness that is Baekhyun’s face. He scowls. “Did you hear me?” He asks, pushing his hand into the bag of chips to pull out a chip and throw it at Baekhyun’s face.

                “I did.” Baekhyun replies, taking the bag of chips away from Jongdae’s side. “My chips.” He says, and Jongdae doesn’t even bother taking it back. “Why the sudden need to get laid?” Baekhyun asks.

                “I’m stressed out, man.” He says, picking himself up from the floor to walk to the couch where Baekhyun is sitting. He figures that Baekhyun’s going to say something to him about it, but he doesn’t. He has his phone in his hands and Jongdae flails his arms in the air, hoping to get Baekhyun’s attention, but the other ignores him, so he lets out a huff as he joins Baekhyun on the couch, pulling his legs up so he can hug it. He stretches his leg out to poke at Baekhyun’s thigh with his toe, and even that didn’t get his attention.

                Jongdae tries again until Baekhyun finally gets the idea. “What do you want me to do about it?” He asks, finally tearing his gaze away from his phone.

                “I don’t know,” Jongdae shrugs, turning to the television. “Find me someone.” And immediately, he sees the corners of Baekhyun’s lips curling into a wide smile. He turns his head again and Jongdae notices that his smile is a bit devilish, sly. He pokes his thigh again. “What–”

                “I have a friend who’s up for a one night stand.” He tells him, “I can talk to him if you’d like.”

                Jongdae suspects that there’s some sort of ulterior motive but he shakes it off his head, turning back to the television as he waves a dismissive hand at Baekhyun. “Yeah, fine, whatever.” 

a/n: hope you guys enjoyed!!